AN: Just a one shot dealing with two characters that a number of people seemed to think paired up very well together, this didn't really fit in with any of the main story, and if you're not familiar with either God Rising or Taming of the Beasts, then this story won't make sense to you. This was a fun one to write, I don't really write much in the way of romance OR comedy, so if you hate this story, well don't hold it against the rest of my work, this was an experiment, branching out from the usual types of things I write and not intended to be continued.

I would of course...appreciate reviews, but if you hated it, 'constructive' criticism is best because I'd like to improve my approach to this kind of interplay between characters, and just saying 'suck story' doesn't help me get better. Know what I mean? :)

Its set shortly after the Taming of the Beasts (a story that is nearing its conclusion as of this writing) and involves the climax of tensions between Vanysa & Demiurge that are built up slightly in the final days of the Beastmen arc.

Vanysa was grinning ear to ear. It wasn't unusual for her, in fact it was quite the norm for the bubbly but brilliant shining little sadist. When the Sorcerer King had discharged her from her duties after the services she'd rendered to him in the Beastmen Kingdom, he'd handed her enough money to start a hundred sandwich shops, and he'd kept his word about letting her have that wonderful pot that let her fry foods. So when she stepped through the gate and found herself back in the capitol she was in an optomistic mood.

She knew just the place she wanted to live now that she was done. Her village was gone, her friends and family dead...but she did have a lovely panda skin coat and a whole lot of money, which meant a whole lot of options. So with that she went to the merchant district and went to the guild hall. It was ornately decorated but not extravagant, tasteful would be the word she chose. Various tables were set up around the place with groups of merchants talking, drinking, laughing, it was a very social environment.

She approached the counter where a pretty young woman stood writing on a piece of paper, she had short hair done up in a bun behind her, it was cream colored, much like her skin, and she had sharp green eyes, she had a small chest and was dressed in semi-formal tan and white attire. When Vanysa approached the woman set aside her writing and folded her hands on the counter. "Yes, how can I help you today?" Her voice was clipped and professional, but her expression was not especially warm.

Vanysa by contrast, had her customary toothy smile on as she sat her pack down on the counter. "Hiya." She said in her bubbly enthusiastic voice that had charmed so many before. "I wanna buy a house in this district, do yah got anythin fer sale?" She asked.

The woman's mouth formed a small frown, though Vanysa was not badly dressed, it was not the sort of clothing usually worn in the merchant district, the woman looked her over thoroughly and said with a growing disinterest, "I doubt we have anything in your price range."

"Ah think yah do." Vanysa said, "Cause everthin is in mah price range."

The woman was just about to inquire as to what she meant when Vanysa turned her pack on its back and swiftly undid the bindings, and out tumbled numerous sacks filled with coins.

"See? Tole yah!" She grinned at the woman whose jaw dropped as the coins spilled out. Nor was she alone, merchants at the tables knew the sound of clinky shiny coins better than they knew the voices of their lovers and children...and for some such men, the sound of clinking coin and chattering lover were the same thing.

Vanysa's eyes took on a clear expression and she said, "Now about my new house...?"

The woman stuttered and gasped as she tried to recover her mental equilibrium, "Ah, yes, yes of course!" She rushed to a back room and came out with several papers.

"Tell me what you want, and we can go see them immediately, I'll escort you personally to any one you want to see!" She said with great enthusiasm and emphasis, striving to make up for her earlier dismissive tone.

"That's better." Vanysa said and she began to flip through the papers one by one, setting aside some and cycling others back through to the bottom, she read quickly now, faster than she'd imagined possible when she first began to learn, and she soon narrowed it down to three homes within a short walk from where she now was. "I want to see these." She said firmly, laying out each document in front of the desk clerk.

"Of course, the owners left keys for us to enter them at need, we can go now if you wish, only allow me a moment to call in an assistant to cover for me." The prim looking woman said with a considerable amount of respect now in her voice.

Vanysa wasn't one to argue over so short a delay, and she had to pack her coins back into place anyway.

So within a few minutes they were both ready to go, the first home was two floors high and had a fine cherry veneer to most of the exterior, however at a closer inspection Vanysa found that there simply was not room for a garden in the back the way she'd hoped. The next home they visited had room for a small garden, however the room she wanted to turn into a library was much smaller than she expected, so that was out as well. Finally they came to the third home, this one was a surprise. She walked in and found a large open great room, just beyond it was a large dark stained double door, before it was a fireplace that had been painted a smokey gray shade. As she walked through the double door she found herself in an eight sided room with shelves around most of it, save for three spaces for chairs. "I've found my library." Vanysa said with a grin.

The rest of the tour of the home was more perfunctory than anything, confirming that there was space to host guests who might stay with her, and an adequate space for her to prepare meals, it had its own space for dining apart from preparing food, and she was not unhappy to find that to be the case. Between the two areas was a stairway that lead down and outside, and the prim woman walked behind her as Vanysa found a small stone walkway that lead to the back of the home, there was ample space for a garden, and as she stood in the center of the open area, she flung her arms out and laughed at the sky. "Ah found mah house." She said with a broad grin at the prim woman, who seemed to finally crack a smile against her will at the enthusiasm of the bubbly enthusiasm of the most unusual Vanysa.

"Less go back an sign stuff, I wanna move in ta day!" She said, back to her bouncy ways, the woman was somewhat mystified by this odd back and forth behavior between one form of behavior and the next, but if the coin was good then the house was hers, that was the extent of her concern.

Within a short span of time they'd returned to the merchant guild headquarters, papers were signed, coins were counted, and the pack was still very heavy when she was done. Vanysa happily took the key in hand and giggled as she held it up to her face, her expression grew haunted and she spoke to no one in particular, the clerk saw the change come over her, but before she could say anything, Vanysa started to speak. "When ah was lil, all ah wanted was a place a mah own, ah slep in ah house...but it was nae ours, a mean man owned it, made mamma do thins to get to stay there, an ahl ah thought bout was 'avin a real place ta live that couldn't nobody take from me, didnae have ta be a manor, jus a lil place with walls, a bed a mah own, an maybah space fer someone else to share. When the beastmen came, ah had already thought ah found that someone ta stay with, an we were even workin ta buy a lil plot a land ta build a home, but he got ate in fronta me, beaten by a minotaur, an then ah saw a rat man eaten his face...that was the last expression ah saw...was on 'is peeled away face...an ah thought...thas what ah get, this appened cause ah had hope, cause ah wanted somethin more than ah was born ta have. By the time ah got free, ain't nuthin left of the pain, ah didnae even care bout gettin ate too, ah just wanted the curse ta end. An it did...just nae the way ah thought...a god broke that curse..." Her voice began to grow clear as her eyes went sharp again, "A god broke that curse," she said softly, repeating herself again as she stared at the key in front of her face, not really seeing who was listening, "He gave me an education, my self respect, my dignity, and I couldn't give anything near as valuable in return but what I thought of as the worthless life of a peasant lower than the dirt, and I learned that my life was as valuable as I was willing to treat it...and now here I am...I have a home...a future...a life to live, all thanks to him, its just...so unreal."

She looked at the key in her hand with moistening eyes and impulsively reached out and hugged the prim looking woman, "Thank you." She said, "For your part in making my life whole."

The woman had, against her better judgement, listened to the blonde girl talk, and as she had, she felt the horrors of what the girl had endured, so when the impulsive hug came, she felt a swelling warmth for her part, and she returned the hug. When it broke, she said with a smile that was actually sincere, "Good luck, and congratulations on your new home. I assume though, you don't want to sleep on the floor? I can arrange for a good furniture dealer to stop by...?"

Vanysa shook her head, "No, I've got a demon to see about that kinda thing." She gave the clerk a cryptic smile and went back to her work as Vanysa made the walk back to her new home and ascended the steps. She took a deep breath and inserted the key into the lock. She turned it slowly, almost afraid it wouldn't open for her, as if it was all going to be taken away and turn out to have been a dream. But it did and it wasn't and she stepped through the door, closed it, locked it, tossed her pack aside and began to cheer happily and clap her hands.

When she was done, she took out the scroll she'd gotten from Demiurge and used it, "Hiya, ahm ready fer a concert ifn you are." She said, "Oh, an ah got a house, yah said when ah did, the Sor'cer King wanted to lemme see some stuff fer it?"

A moment later the gate opened in her home and through it stepped a well dressed demon in a suit. "Hiya Demiurge." She said and bounced over to him.

He pushed up his glasses closer to his face and let a smile form that had chilled the blood of many an unfortunate. "And hello to you Vanysa, so this is your new home." He sighed and shrugged, "Its not exactly Nazarick..."

Her voice turned serious as her eyes went clear, she pulled a somewhat pouty expression and folded her arms and turned sideways away from him. "Well no, but what is, you can't compare this world to that paradise, besides, it might not be much, but it is truly mine, bought and paid for and I can do what I want with it. Hmpf."

Demiurge laughed, "I suppose that is true, and the offer of Lord Ainz stands, if you want it furnished, he said he had...'lots of extras from a gatchadrop' and you were welcome to a few if you wanted them...still stands."

She looked at him cockeyed, "What the hell is a gatchadrop?" She asked.

"Well that I don't really know, apparently it has something to do with a game the supreme ones played sometimes, and it gave up small items that they didn't really need. One of them said it was like fap material, better to have it than not, so they kept it all...and no I don't know what that really means either." Demiurge shook his head with a sigh. "Arguably it is my second greatest frustration, the supreme beings created all of us from nothing, they imbued us with power, knowledge, personality, our very souls are of their making, and they came to the world they made for us so often...but we know so little about them."

"Even Lord Ainz?" She asked curiously.

"Yes, even he, he rarely speaks of his time in the otherworld, and it would be presumptuous of us to ask him of it." Demiurge said.

"Why don't I?" Vanysa said with a cheery smile, "I'm not one of his creations...well...not really the same way anyway." She said, touching her cheek thoughtfully as she looked up, "I mean I guess in a way I am, I wouldn't be who I am without him, so I'm kinda one of his creations, but...not like you are, so maybe he wouldn't mind if I asked a bit."

Demiurge paused at that, "How...interesting an idea." He said, "We'll come back to that, for now I am to show you what is available for your use."

"Then can we make music?" She asked, a sadistic grin on her face as she took his hand and looked up at him.

Demiurge had rarely felt awkward in his life, but...her infectious enthusiasm, gave him...impulsive and pleasant thoughts that he wasn't entirely familiar with.

"Of course." He said, "I had a song in mind today that I thought you might enjoy, it can be easily duplicated on...human instruments."

She giggled, "How wonderful!" She said with her eyes both sadistic and full of life looking up at him, "And they deserve it?" She asked.

"Very much so. These are prisoners from the empire, two slavers and a child killer. I am to...show them the error of their ways before I take them to work on the farm." He said, and Vanysa wiggled her entire lower body in excitement.

"Oh this will be fun!" she said, "Something to look forward to! Will Neuronist be joining us?" Her eyes danced with happiness and she rose to her tiptoes and leaned in towards the demonic guardian.

"No, she has herself occupied with something else I'm afraid, so it will be just the two of us." Demiurge said in a self depricating sort of voice.

"Perhaps...Lord Ainz would care for a song, I do so love to see him pleased." She said, and cupped her other hand in his, "And we do make such marvelous music, surely he would be delighted!" Her voice was filled with eagerness, but again Demiurge had to disappoint her.

"I'm afraid not, he is away from the tomb, so you will merely have my company to enjoy today." He gave a humorous sigh and she went from holding his hand, to jumping beside him and wrapping her arms around his entire left arm.

"An ahm right happy ta enjoy it mr. musical demon demiurge." She said as her sweet peasant voice returned and a strange morphing of sadism and cuteness shone in her eyes, she reminded him of a cat that had caught a small animal to torture before eating it, and it was impossible not to like.

"Then, lets go to Nazarick." He said, and they stepped together through the gate.

When they arrived in Nazarick they found Pandora's Actor waiting for them on the other side. He bowed with a hand over his heart and said, "Per the instruction of Lord Ainz, I am to provide whatever the lady Vanysa requires for her home, within reason, where 'reason' is to be at the discretion of Lord Demiurge."

"So...yer'a takin me shoppin?" She said at him with a wicked smile.

"I suppose I am." He said, "Then lets be off to it, lead the way Pandora's Actor."

He wheeled about with military precision and lead them into the treasury, Demiurge noticed that she walked indifferently past all the coins, arms, and other treasures.

"Are you not impressed with all that the supreme ones have amassed?" He asked, unsure if he should be offended on their behalf or not.

"Oh of course, its amazing how wealthy Lord Ainz is...but...I just don't care about money, its only a thing that is used to get other things." She said indifferently as she clung to his arm as her voice returned to its educated state, "I had a lot of wants a long time ago, they were all torn down, and in the end only two things remained before I met Lord Ainz. A home and someone in it with me, since then I've had my wants grow, I want to serve him well and show him I was not a waste to educate, but also..." She looked to her right and up at his face, "I want to make music...like the music I once made when those others did things to me, but I don't want to be them, so I want to do it on those who deserve it. Does that...make sense Lord Demiurge?" She asked uncertainly.

"Wanting to prove yourselves to the supreme ones is something any guardian would understand, submitting to their will completely is what we live for, its probably why you're still alive, I overheard what you said the first time you met Albedo & Shalltear, supreme submission to master of Nazarick is entirely right, and your desire to honor him properly by holding back nothing of yourself is a reflection of who we all are. While they might not 'like' that you were making such offers, they'll never argue again that you shouldn't." He said as they walked impassively past treasures that, with only a handful, would have been more valuable than the entire treasury of a single nation.

"Gee, an here I was'a thinkin they didn like me." She said with a half a pout.

"I don't think they do...but try not to be offended by it, they each want Lord Ainz and make the same offer you did, they may understand it, they may even praise the sense in it, but don't expect them to become especially fond of you. You're still a human, and not part of Nazarick, even if you are something of a 'pet' to the supreme ruler." Demiurge said instructively.

She let go of his arm and then with two fawn like bounds leapt in front of Demiurge, leaned forward, and laughed, "Oh a pet am I, does that mean I should wag my tail more often?" She laughed, swung herself around, and shook her hips, prompting Demiurge to laugh, "Not if you want to endear yourselves to those two." He said.

She looked back over her shoulder, "Well I know one dirty demon it does endear me to." She said and flashed him a sweet smile and sadistic eyes, and then she reclaimed his arm as if she'd never let it go.

How long such behavior might have gone on can never be known, because a moment later they arrived in the book repository section of the treasury, and Pandora's Actor snatched a book from the shelf and brought it over to them. He held the book out and said, "Touch the image and you will see it appear, touch the image again to return it to its place, touch and hold the image when you have made a selection mein guten frau."

She looked at Demiurge uncertainly, but he nodded and she eagerly flipped open the book and touched a picture of a chair, before her appeared something as ornate as a throne, intricate carvings and bright gold fabric. "This is an Edwardian style chair, please, sit." She grinned like a kid in a candy store and took a seat as Demiurge stood beside her and placed one hand on the back of it.

"It is a very nice piece, but does it make you feel comfortable?" He asked. "It, as with most pieces, is enchanted, this one is one that enhances openness and is meant to relax guests."

Her eyes went wide, enchanting furniture was incredibly rare and very expensive, and this was just being given to her? "Ah cannae take this? Ah didnae do that much for the supreme one...ah'd feel bad bout takin somethin this nice..." She said looking down, but clearly not wanting to get up out of the chair.

Demiurge patted her shoulder, "Nonsense. For Lord Ainz these are mere trinkets to be given to those to whom he favors, they are as nothing, and he has spoken of how often you made him laugh, and to him, that is a great treasure indeed, the burden of leadership is a heavy one, and in bringing him laughter, you bring him relief, if this were excessive, I would deny you without hesitation or mercy, no matter how you pleaded for it, but this is nothing." He said. "If you wish it, it is yours." The demon added.

She grinned. "Aight ahl take it!" she said. And so it went with one item after another, till they came to the bed, for that, she climbed on and then said to Demiurge, "I won't know if it feels right until someone else is in it, so..." She gestured to half the bed and arched an eyebrow at the archdemon.

He blinked. "You want me to try it out with you?" He asked with surprise.

"Well, yer takin me shoppin aintcha? This is what'appens when a man takes a woman shoppin, he goes along with her silly requests an makes 'er happy. Yah wouldnae want me gettin somethin less than perfect wouldja?" She asked devilishly.

And that was how he found himself laying on the bed with a sadistically inclined and musically gifted human girl. "So Demiurge," she asked as he lay next to her, she looked over to see if Pandora's Actor was still there, but they were alone and left to their own devices, "do you like girls?" She asked.

It was such an odd question that he wasn't quite sure how to answer. "I'm an archdemon you know. I generally see humans as prey or tools for the supreme one."

She pouted for a moment and rolled onto her side and looked at him, propping her head up, she asked, "Do yah wanna torture me? Hurt me? Kill me? Make me scream an suffer an beg for death?" Her voice was casual, shockingly so, as if she were asking about the meal preference.

"You're one of Lord Ainz's servants." He said.

Her eyes became cunning and intelligent again, "That isn't really an answer Demiurge, you know that. That is why you would refrain from doing it if you wanted to. I'm asking if that is what you actually want to do to me. Given the opportunity, would you have me begging for the mercy of death?"

It was a bold question, and he knew she was right, his answer hadn't been a proper one. "I do like making music with you." He said.

She sighed. "Archdemon or not, you are very...very male." She said and looked around, a door closed in the distance, indicating they were now completely alone.

She rolled and flipped herself overtop of him and sat up, holding her hands on his chest. It caught him by surprise, though he could have been quick enough to stop her, it hadn't occurred to him to want to do so.

"The truth Demiurge. If Lord Ainz gave you permission to do anything at all to me, anything...no matter how cruel, how depraved, and how much I begged for mercy...what would my sadistic music making partner in pain choose for my fate? We've eaten many meals, we have played many songs, but always behind the music I have wondered...do you simply wish me to sing as they do? Even if its terrible...I have to know, and I have to know now. I cannot wait for knowledge any longer, and I will forgive and accept any answer you give as the truth without complaint...so long as the wondering stops." She said, her voice beginning firmly, and slowly softening to a whisper, and as her voice grow lower, so too did her body, until her breasts were barely an inch from his chest and she added...

"Tell me archdevil...what do you REALLY...want to do with Vanysa in your power..." Her fingers roamed his chest and her eyes were wide and locked with his, searching for the truth within.

"This." He said impulsively, and grabbed her golden mane close to her scalp, and he pulled her the rest of the way down, pressing her body against his, and crushing her lips to his own, his tongue dueling with hers in a match that neither could lose and both would win as her arms went round him as she consented to his embrace. She laughed as they tore into one another's clothing, "Ahl be takin this bed, that be for damn sure, jus gotta break er in first!" He could not say anything back, as her lips had covered his and stolen away his words...they were much like his clothing in a sense anyway...unnecessary at the moment, and in the way.

-The End-

AN: If you enjoyed this story and want to show your appreciation for it, you can donate a dollar or so to this charity organization: bdgiving dot org.