Disclaimer: Nothing is mine. Though, if it was...

NOTE: Just so everyone knows where I stand, what with everything coming at us this season (and possibly future seasons) I am wholeheartedly Snowbarry. And I shall remain on this ship, come what may, too.

YOLO, my friends!


::Making Amends::


Cisco and Wells are both long gone, now.

And yet, when Barry moves into the main foyer of STAR labs, the faint glow of a lamp light does not surprise him in the least. Looking in the direction of said golden glow, the young man can just make out the outlined silhouette of the lone inhabitant left within the complex's walls, moving in the lab room at the opposite end of the foyer.

Barry swallows, knowing that the heavy feelings of guilt and remorse curling in his abdomen are truly well deserved.

He has faced meta-humans that can turn to iron, can poison him in an instant; can even shoot lightning from their very finger tips. And yet.

And yet.

The hammering of his heart as he makes his way to the room drowns out everything else. Just as he nears the threshold to the small lab room, Barry idly wonders if she can hear his approach.

But then he is standing in the entry way, his shoulder nearly brushing the door frame and he realizes that the young woman in question is far too distracted to notice she is no longer alone. He looks over her profile, committing it to his memory before he can stop himself.

Caitlin Snow is half-bent over the desk on the far wall, sitting at the very edge of a high chair, and scribbling on some kind of chart with practiced ease. The pen moves across the page almost as fast a blur as Barry is when he runs. His eyes moves from the paper, after a moment's hesitation, up to the doctor's face.

His breath catches, and it takes him another moment to remember to exhale.

Her bottom lip is sucked in, being nibbled on lightly by even, white teeth. Her eyebrows are furrowed in concentration, and her long, heavy curtain of wavy dark hair spills over one shoulder and brushes against the surface of the desk.

What seems to be at odds with her severe focus, however, is her state of dress. Her usual crisp, professional attire looks as weary as Barry feels; the sleeves of her blouse are rolled up to bunch at her elbows, her skirt looks as if it has decided to start collecting wrinkles as if they have gone out of style, and her shoes...

Barry blinks.

Caitlin is not wearing any shoes. She must have decided to take them off, thinking she was truly alone- Barry can see the high heels paired on the floor neatly at the end of the table. Leaving her feet perfectly bare.

Naked.

Something shifts in Barry; he isn't quite sure what, but seeing Cailtin so unguarded, so very relaxed, seems incredibly... intimate. Another heavy feeling tries to make an appearance in Barry's abdomen, but he shoves it down instantly, before he can have a chance to properly analyze it.

Probably for the best, in any case.

Barry clears his throat to get Caitlin's attention- any longer going unnoticed and he is liable to abandon any vestiges of remaining dignity to leave and avoid having this conversation.

Startled, Caitlin's head snaps up, her pen slipping from her fingers and rolling off the table. It clatters onto the floor, the thwack sounding unnaturally loud in the otherwise heavy silence.

Barry watches as Caitlin's mouth flutters open and shut, her dark brown eyes- always so open and expressive despite her ongoing efforts -exhibiting nothing but genuine surprise.

"Barry," Caitlin starts, sitting up properly. Her hands fall into her lap, clasping together into a tight ball. She looks over at the clock on the wall; 1:12 am. "You're still here. It's pretty late."

She turns her gaze back to him, a hint of question peeking through.

Barry sighs heavily, lowering his head and burying his face into his hands. He needs to apologize, and now. A soft groan escapes from his lips in dismay when he realizes he has no idea how to start.

There's much he has to atone for.

Now or never, the thought dances through his mind.

All intentions of apologizing scatter, however, the moment a pair of incredibly soft, warm hands grip both of his wrists. The hands pull Barry's hands away from his face, leaving his surprised gaze to find Caitlin's concerned one.

Why didn't I hear her move? Barry thinks stupidly, and then belatedly remembers her current shoeless state. Caitlin's hands move from his wrists to cup his face, her slender fingers so light and gentle on his skin they feel like a gossamer's touch.

Her thumbs rest just below the hollows of his eyes.

"What's wrong?" she inquires, and Barry instantly recognizes her doctor's "no nonsense" voice. She moves a bit closer, trying to look closely at Barry's eyes. Being even shorter than usual without her heels, Caitlin rises to her tiptoes for a better look.

Her movement is unexpected, and with Barry still having his face down, he is caught off guard when her nose clumsily bumps against his.

"Whoa," Barry takes a step back to give them space. His nose tingles pleasantly, and he feels strangely winded.

"Oops," Caitlin replies, though she still seems preoccupied with trying to diagnose the meta-human. "Barry, you need to stand still so I can see if your eyes are dilated. Why did you wait for so long before letting me know you weren't well?"

Barry is at a loss.

Not well? What is she-? And then it hits him; when he had buried his face and groaned from his inability to own up to his wrongdoing, Caitlin must have mistaken that as him being in pain.

It's this realization that cinches it for Barry. After his heartless words towards her, using her worst vulnerability to attack her- only for her to turn right back around and instinctively try to help ease his own suffering now.

Something thick lodges deep in his throat, and he has to clear his throat twice. She deserves so much better.

He owes it to her.

"I'm sorry," he blurts, his earlier remorse returning with a sudden vengence and making his chest feel uncomfortably tight.

Caitlin nods sharply.

"You should be," she starts matter-of-fact, and Barry swallows his pride to await his due tongue lashing. "Who knows if there are long-term side effect on your brain, or even your entire nervous system, for that matter. When it comes to meta-humans, especially, you cannot be so lax about your health and wellbeing, Barry-"

"Huh?" Barry interrupts, peering down at her, utterly confused. Caitlin stops short. Her brow furrows.

"What?" she asks. If Barry doesn't know any better, he would assume she sounds almost defensive under his stare. "It's true- we don't know the long term effects on your body. Are you hurting anywhere?"

Her fingers flutter to his temples, brushing the sensitive skin. So light, they almost tickle. "If you are having any residual headaches, there are massage therapies that can-"

Barry shakes his head, raising his hands to cup both of Caitlin's. Her skin is reassuringly warm and soft against his own. He pulls her hands down to hold in the space between them.

For the first time since he's stepped into the labs this late with one intention on his mind, he feels his lips quirking lightly into a grin. Caitlin Snow; caretaker extraordinaire.

Honestly, the one constant in his life right about now.

And then he's peering deeply into her eyes, his mind suddenly flashing back to earlier. The look of betrayal open and raw on her face before she's turning quickly to hide from his view and skittering away from him, wounded.

The fledgling smile disappears as fast as it comes.

"I-I'm sorry. For earlier. What I said to you- it was unforgivable." Barry swallows. He can literally see when undertanding fills Caitlin's face, and her mouth forms a tiny "o". "And if there was any way I could take what I said back..."

I'm so sorry. So sorry.

Though, to her credit and Barry's ultimate relief, she does not pull herself away or look repulsed. In fact... Barry narrows his eyes at her countenance.

Caitlin ducks her head slightly, nibbling once again on her lower lip. Her eyes dart everywhere but back to Barry. She looks almost chagrined.

"Cailtin?" Barry inquires slowly. He's still waiting for his telling off.

"What you said earlier..." Cailtin starts. Then stops. She seems preoccupied, before sighing softly to herself and lifting her head to stare calmly back at Barry. "It wasn't unforgivable... "

She narrows her eyes.

"It was painful to hear," she clarifies, and continues even as Barry opens his mouth intinctively to reply. "But... you weren't wrong in a sense."

Now Barry is wholly confused and he mindlessly tightens his grips on her hands. When she winces, he soothes her by rubbing his thumbs on the backs of her hands in apology.

She sends him a grateful smile and elaborates.

"Barry, you must know that I care about you." Her head tilts just slightly, her eyes narrowing. "Right?"

"There isn't a doubt in my mind," Barry reassures her, feeling the certainty in his chest at his words. And there isn't- the first person was her, when he had woken from his coma, and throughout the last month and a half, who hasn't treated him any different- whether being normal (and sometimes admittedly an insufferable) Barry Allen, or donning on his altar ego of The Flash.

Caitlin sees both sides of him, and treats him the same, regardless.

Caitlin nods. Then something unreadable clouds her face, making her brow furrow slightly.

"I was thinking about what you said, and I can only come to one conclusion."

Barry's heart starts hammering again, and he feels the hint of dread coming on.

"And... that is?" he asks. Hesitantly. Absent-minded, his hands once again grip Caitlin's tightly, his fingers curling over hers with steeled resolve. He's not sure if he'll actually be able to let go once she gives him the ultimatum.

"I will certainly forgive you," she tells him, and the grateful smile is tearing across Barry's lips before he can stop it. The relief that washes over him is so overwhelming that, for a moment, the meta-human feels wonderfully lightheaded.

And then Caitlin opens her mouth and continues to talk.

"Only on one condition."

Barry licks his suddenly dry lips. "And what is that?"

"That you can find it in yourself to forgive me."

"For what?" Barry blurts stupidly.

Caitlin measures a look at him.

"You may have been speaking out of anger," she says calmly. "And maybe the intention behind it was to hurt me, but that does not mean there wasn't any truth to what you had to say."

Barry's mouth turns dry as ash, and he squeezes his eyes shut. Damn it. She has always had the superpower to see right through him- to know him better, at times, than he knew himself.

"Caitlin, I-"

She holds up her hand to stop him. Her eyes are bright, intense, and Barry knows instantly that she will not stop until she says what needs to be said.

"I lost Ronnie, yes. And I still feel the pain of that everyday. I don't know if it will ever truly go away." Caitlin gauges his reaction to see him paying rapt attention, and he nods for her to continue. "And I fear that the care I have for you is being received as me seeing Ronnie when I look at you."

Barry's jaw clenches and it feels like Caitlin has just reached into his chest and literally wrapped his heart in a tight grasp. Damn, how does she do it? Read him so well?

"I'm so sorry," Barry says again, his eyes falling to his feet. He feels ashamed that his irrational irritations made him lash out at the person who deserves it least- even if said irritations have been bothering him as of late, nonstop.

Caitlin shakes her head, a soft hint of a smile touching the corner of her lips.

"Don't be." It's her hands squeezing his reassuringly now. "You feel how you feel- and I want you to know that the care I exhibit, when I dance on your last nerve with my hovering and make you want to tear your hair out because I just don't know how to take a hint and close my mouth when it comes to your safety..."

Caitlin's eyes are full of shy mirth when she glances at the slow smile twisting Barry's lips at her words.

"That is for you, Barry Allen. You and no one else. Please don't ever doubt that again, okay?"

Barry doesn't know how to respond but to pull Caitlin towards him impulsively.

A soft "oof" escapes the petite woman when she finds herself being wrapped into an unyeilding hug. Her front is meshed tightly to Barry's and when his arms wrap around her back and she feels Barry's face turning to bury in the space between her chin and collar bone, her heart feels at peace.

"You have my word, Caitlin. Never again." His voice whispers in her ear.

She feels content, and a soft hum escapes her. She does not hesitate to return the hug, her fingers curling into the fabric of Barry's shirt at his back.

Her eyes do widen, however, when she feels the ghost of what she suspects as Barry's lips brushing so lightly against the hollow of her throat. Her heart flutters briefly off-rhythm, but before she has time to analyze it fully, Barry is pulling back.

His hands lower to rest lighty at her waist, and her hands move to rest lightly on his forearms.

"I still want to make it up to you, though." Barry insists, his grin turning into a mixture of goofy relief. Caitlin's answering smile can only be called teasing.

"Well, I did have a few experiments I was considering and you could be of use..."

Barry thrusts his arms out at her, crossing his hands at the wrists as if about to be arrested.

"I'm all yours, Doctor Snow." He tells her breathlessly.

The full smile returned his way reassures Barry that he has just said the right words.


END.