Five high schoolers sat around each other in a circle.
"What are we doing here?" Kagura asked her friends.
"Shouldn't we have gone home a while ago?" asked Yomi.
"Hey you guys."
The five girls turned towards the door to see Tomo, who began to sing.
"We're just some high school squares
A jock, a nerd, one just stares!
And no matter what it's based off of
It's just a big rip-off!
Singing in high school
Seems to be the thing that's cool
So I'll do it until popularity wise I'm number five!
Chiyo's kind of cute
Kagura has boobs
Sakaki does too
It's weird, it's lame, but Osaka has all the fame!
Singing in high school
Seems to be the only rule
To be popular, who am I tryin' to fool?
No need for originality
I don't have imagination see
And this pose uses up all of my creativity…
It's all schlock!
So what do you think?"
"It wasn't very good," said Kagura.
"Yeah," said Osaka.
"Indeed," Yomi agreed.
At that moment Yukari walked in through the door, she was surprised to see students in her classroom. She walked over to the six of them and opened her mouth at the same time as Tomo, when a strange song filled the air.
"When they see me rollin'
They hang ten
Patrollin' to try and catch me shippin' with nerdy!
Wanna see ship with me nerdy!
Wanna see me shippin' with nerdy!
They wanna, wanna see me ship with nerdy!
They wanna see it, to try and make their fanfics sturdy!
Wanna see me ship with nerdy!
To make their fanfics sturdy!
Wanna see me shippin' to make their fanfics sturdy.
But that's somethin' I would I never do
She's a girl I would never screw!
I'd rather roll with, a gangster
Or someone who might do somethin' dirty
Not gonna ship with nerdy!
Never gonna ship with nerdy!
Yeah I'm never, never gonna ship with nerdy!"
"Who sang that?" asked Osaka, "was it Tomo or Miss Yukari?"
"I could tell you," said Kaorin, "but it's just that….
I know, I know, but if I try to tell you y'all won't hear me.
And it's so, it's so, sad to think that you won't listen to me.
'Cause every time I have something to say, you wave me a way...
And it's so frustrating, that you won't let me talk!
I just hang with you guys for a while
And it's so frustrating, that you won't let me ta—"
"Not now Kaorin," said Tomo, "they're trying to figure out whether it was me, or Yukari who sang that song."
"I know who sang it!" yelled Kaorin.
"Oh yeah?" Tomo challenged.
"Yeah!" said an angry Kaorin.
"You wanna go or somethin'?" asked Tomo.
"Bring it on," said Kaorin, "I'll tear you to pieces!"
"I'm not afraid, I'm not afraid
To take a stand, to take a stand.
Everybody, everybody,
Just hold my hand, just hold my—"
Tomo turned her head to see her hand being gripped lightly. Everyone else stared in surprise as Yomi awkwardly stood there.
"Oh, I thought you were being serious," said Yomi.
"When they see me rollin'
They hang ten
Patrollin' to try and catch me—"
The sickening crunch of silicon filled teenage ears as Tomo smashed the MP3 player under her enraged fist.
"Hey," said Chihiro, "that was my iPod!"
"Shut up," said Tomo, who then pressed her lips against the black haired girl's mouth.
"Gah!" exclaimed Kaorin as she smacked the "Wildcat" in the face. "How dare you do that to my girlfriend!"
"She's your girlfriend?" asked Tomo.
"She promised that she'd leave me in a second for Sakaki," said Kaorin, "that was something I promised her as well. What brought us together was that we would instantly dump each other for someone better."
"Wha?" said Sakaki, "What did you just say?"
"Nah I'm just kidding," said Kaorin, "we're not dating."
"Okay," said Yukari, "if we're going to be singing I think that it's my turn to try something out."
"What are you gonna do Ms. Yukari?" asked Tomo.
"Wake up in the mornin' feelin' like p-diddy.
Down a glass of vodka that tastes shitty.
Might as well have been water from the Volga river.
'Cause it would taste and be just as bad for my liver.
I don't do much else you know, know.
Down a forty ouncers in the snow, snow.
Probably shouldn't though.
I have a friend who's super naggy
In Halo Reach I do teabagging
Hate it when my brain starts lagg-ing."
At that moment Yukari paused, trying to come up with more lyrics for her song.
"So," said Tomo, as Yukari kept thinking, "what did you get for Christmas this year?"
"Well," said Kaorin, "what I wanted the most this year for Christmas, never came."
"What was that?" asked everybody, except for Yukari who was still trying to think up lyrics to her song.
"I didn't want a lot for Christmas
There was just this one thing
Didn't care about tons of presents, underneath the Christmas tree.
I just wanted for my own, more than you could ever know
You see, all I wanted was a pon-y."
"Why did you want a pony?" asked Tomo.
"I wanted to be a wonderful, beautiful princess," said Kaorin, "but even after sixteen years my parents didn't get me a pony."
"I see," said Tomo, who also secretly longed to be a princess like all living girls under forty five.
Yomi grumbled to herself, imagining being dressed in a pink gown with a pointed hat that had a veil trailing off of it from the top. The girl felt her mouth curve into a slight smile.
"I think I just realized something," said Chiyo.
"What is that?"
"Well I got a feelin'
That we're gonna be alright.
Yeah I got a feelin'
That we're gonna have a good life.
I got a feelin'
That we'll all stay friends.
Even if we don't see each other for a while
With Facebook we can stay connected
No matter how far we travel.
Yeah, this is somethin' I know
Since we're in Japan and everyone has a computer.
Yeah, from the tech boom, from the 90s
Everyone, has a PC.
We'll stay connected
Don't you see?
You can't get Facebook e-mail notifications to go away
So we can communicate, every, day.
I know I've tried
It's so frustrating to see, every attempt failing so obviously.
I mean I signed up with my main e-mail account, geez.
So what do you say?"
"I think we should go home, we've been here forever," said Kagura.
Sakaki nodded her head in agreement, though when she saw Chiyo a different Black Eyed Peas song came to mind.
The words, I wanna rock right now, I wanna rock right now, I wanna rock right now, began to play in Sakaki's head as she watched Chiyo walk by her.
Hmm, thought Sakaki, maybe I shouldn't be thinking that about her.