Hellos! Gravity Falls fic! Takes place right after "Scary-oke," the start of Season Two. With this fic, I'm planning to put in some new mysteries of my own, each one right after an episode. They should be original... I will not be reciting canon, I will be citing Dipper's thoughts about the episode but not the episode itself. I expect the reader, you, to know his Gravity Falls. This isn't a crossover or anything… no excuses.
Chapter 1
Hey, Dipper here. Gravity Falls is a mysterious place here in Oregon. My sister and I have seen amazing things. From talking gnomes, to magic and time travelling to minotaurs. What other place has all these things? Most recently, we had an invasion of real life zombies! We successfully fended them off… by singing. Thank god everybody else was fleeing in terror. Soos became a zombie but we cured him using lots of formaldehyde and cinnamon. Soos said being a zombie was pretty much the same as his normal self. I'm not sure if that's a good thing. He did say that he had a distinct hunger for brains and could taste the color pink. I saw him poking Waddle's head earlier today in a fixated fashion. I'm not sure if that's a side-effect of being a zombie or if that's just Soos.
Anyways, apparently, there was a person who documented all the mysterious occurences of this small town. I call him "The Author." I know, I know, it's not really an amazing name or anything. From what I know about The Author is that he has three journals and… that's about all I know. I have Journal #3 by the way. I think Gideon had journal #2 but he was arrested after Mabel and I defeated his giant robot and all that, so I don't know where it is now. So that's that. On a positive note, Grunkle Stan believes in the supernatural. Apparently he already knew about it. That's strange…
Right now, I'm cleaning up some zombie bits all over the mystery shack. Finding an eyeball while in the bathroom is very unsettling… I only noticed it halfway through conducting my daily business. Needless to say, half is better than nothing. I really hope the eye couldn't see anything.
Dipper sighed as he closed the journal he was writing in. It was just a normal journal, not The Journal. "Bleh." Dipper stated as he picked up a green, rotting arm with his index and thumb. He extended his arm as far he could away from him and positioned it over a trash bag and dropped it in.
"Hey!" Dipper shouted. "I could really use a little help over here!" There was a moment of silence with no reply. "Mabel?" He called out.
His sister bursted in the room carrying Waddles above her head. "Super-zombifier-destroyo-pig to the rescue!" She went brought Waddles over and placed him in the center of the room. Waddles had a blue spandex, red underwear and a red cap, fully contributing to the super pig as Mabel stated. Mabel was wearing a red and gold sweater, etched in green, it read: ¡Hola! ¡Feliz cumpleaños! 18/6.
"Alright bro, I'll help yah." The cheerful girl looked around the room. "There's a lot of zombie guts everywhere." She observed.
"Yeah I know." Dipper replied. "That's why I need your help."
"Why isn't Soos helping with this?" Mabel started to happily hum 'Taking Over Midnight' as she picked up some of the zombie limbs and then placing them in the trash bag.
"I saw Soos licking crayons. I think he wanted to know what rainbow tasted like. He did say that he could taste pink while he was a zombie. Now he's sick. I think he's at his grandmother's house." Dipper scrunched up his face. Seriously, Soos is another mystery all together.
"Yeah." Mabel rubbed her stomach wistfully. "Who knew that rainbow tasted like wax?"
Dipper just stared at his twin for a good long minute.
"Let's just clean this up."
"I got a better idea! Let's go do some Mystery Hunting! That new purple ink stuff should brings all kinds of mystery to solve." Mabel said with a large smile.
"That does sound like a good idea." Dipper grudgingly admitted as he threw a green jaw into the trashbag. "But what about all these zombie bits?"
Mabel her hand dismissively. "It'll be fine. C'mon Dip let's go!"
Dipper looked around the shack hesitantly. He then made up his mind. Who the heck would want to spend their time cleaning up zombie junk. "Yea.." He said reluctantly. "I'm sure it'll be fine. Let's go."
"Yes!" Mabel threw her hands up into the air in a cheer. "Hey Waddles." She said, "Get yo head out that zombie head and start cleaning this place up. My homie!" She made a rap pose, leaning back with her right hand up making a upside down peace sign. The pig oinked and seemingly nodded its head at the command.
"Do you really think Waddl- Hey wait up!" Dipper started to say but stopped as he saw Mabel skipping out the wooden door. He proceeded to run after her.
The twins ran to the forest, Mabel carrying a Pit Cola and Dipper carrying the journal and the purple fluorescent light. The two arrived at a clearing in the center of the mystical forest and found a stone to sit down on.
"Hmm let's see if there's anything new." Dipper took out the journal and placed it on his lap. He flipped to a random page and shined the purple light on it. "Hey Mabel. Remember that crystal that changes our height?"
The mentioned girl was currently on her back staring up into the cloudy skies, her lips were stained with soda as she held a can in her right hand. "Of course I do." She said. "Little Dipper..." She grinned wildly from her spot.
"Mabel! I thought we talked about this!"
"I know. I know. I'm just kidding. No need to blow your short stack."
"Seriously Mabel."
"All right. All right. So what's up with those crystals?" She rolled onto her stomach, facing dipper and placing her hands on her chins and her elbows on the ground.
Dipper read from the book, "It says here that: "In my studies, I have found that when shrinking, the mass of the object will be maintained; therefore the density of the object is immensely increased and could grant an item the size of an ant the mass of a car. When performed on living organisms, their muscles mass remains and despite their size could punch with the same force and speed normally. I call this the Ant Man princi-"
"Blehh." Mabel called out, rolling on to her back. "Too much sciency stuff!"
"Wait." Dipper interjected. "I'll read you something interesting then." He cleared his throat. "For the most thorough investigation on the height altering crystal, I carefully broke the large crystal. To my surprise, there was a white crystal within it. Unfortunately, a gnome snatched it out my hands yelling 'My Precious' and I was unable to see the crystal's properties." Dipper made sure the bookmark was on the page he was reading and then closed the book and looked at her sister. "You wanna find the white crystal?"
"Finally! A mystery!" Mabel cheered. She got up from her spot.
"I think I remember where it is..." Dipper said with a thoughtful expression with his hand on his chin. He looked around the forest to find familiar markings. "Aha! That way!" He pointed to a spot in between two trees. "Let's go Mabel!"
Dipper darted through the trees, making his way to his destination, behind him Mabel followed. He eventually stopped to catch his breath. He looked around him, he was on the top of an inclined area. He looked around him.
His arriving sister voiced his thoughts. "Bro, I think we're lost."
"N-no we're not. I happen to know exactly where we're going."
"Really."
"Of course I do."
Mabel walked up to her brother who was now frantically reading Journal Three with the fluorescent light. He was muttering what he read in a low voice. "Hey Dip." She said. Receiving no reply, she said it again, "Hey Dipper~~" Still, she was ignored. She positioned herself close to her brother and positioned her head next to his ear. "Dipper!" She shouted.
Dipper stumbled in surprise, losing balance and fell backwards onto the sloped ground. "Gah!" He shouted as he tumbled down the hill. He kept rolling down, fortunately missing any rocks in the way. He then collided against a smooth surface, effectively stopping his descent. He groaned in pain, there was dirt covering his clothing and arms. He looked to the hill he rolled down. There he saw Mabel with a sheepish smile walking down the hill, he could barely make out the apologies from his sister. He groaned once more and pushed his back against the surface he collided with. He looked to his side and became wide eyed as he saw a small blue crystal. Quickly turning around, he realized what he rolled in to.
"Hey look!" Mabel chirped. "There's the crystal!" She struck a pose with her hands on her waist and chin up, "All thanks to detective Mabel!"
"Right." Dipper deadpanned. He shook his head to clear his thoughts and stood up. "So how are we going to break this?"
"Leave it to me and my..." Mabel started to say, she reached into her pocket, "GRAPPLING HOOK!" She pulled out the grappling hook while looking triumphant.
"Mabel, how is that going to help?"
"Watch and learn." Dipper stepped aside. He looked dubious at his sister. How would a grappling hook help?
The girl squinted her eyes as she looked at the crystal. "Hiyah!" She shouted. She threw the grappling hook as hard as she could at the crystal. It shattered, bits and pieces scatter, causing Dipper to cover himself. That was not what he expected. At all.
"G-good job Mabel."
"Haha! Thanks!"
The twins looked at the shattered remains. Amidst the destruction sat a slightly opaque white crystal thrice the size of the crystal Dipper originally had gotten. Dipper cautiously walked towards it and grabbed it. It was surprisingly lighter than he expected.
"Okay!" He declared. "Let's get back to Mystery Shack and see what it does."
"'Kay. But this time, let Mabel lead the way."
"Fine."
The two made their way back to the shack. They were fairly surprised not to see any zombie parts there. Sure, the shack was still destroyed, but all the zombie parts were gone. Dipper noticed there was trash bags laid against the walls. Presumably filled with the zombie bits. He stared in amazement.
"Good job Waddles!" Mabel cheered.
"This is... impressive." Dipper admitted. He then shook his head. "Let's get a flashlight." With the crystal under his arm, he proceeded to get a flashlight.
Dipper found the flashlight and some tape and walked up to their room. The crystal was much bigger than the diameter of the flashlight so he placed the flashlight in the center and taped it on and then leaned the crystal against the wall of their room. He stood in front of it, placing his hands on his hip while debating whether or not he should turn it on. He shrugged and grabbed one of his spare shirts and positioned it so the light would shine on it when he turned it on. Satisfied with his set up he walked towards the flashlight-crystal contraption. He reached behind the crystal and the turned it on. A visible white light shone on the shirt.
"It... it did nothing?" Dipper said, frowning. Behind him he heard the door opening revealing Mabel.
"Found anything cool yet?"
"No.. I don't think the crystal does anything. It's just a crystal I guess." Shrugging, he pointed to the light shining on his blank white shirt. He then walked towards the shirt and pointed. "See?" He went to grab his shirt, positioning him in front of the white beam.
"Dipper!" Mabel cried out in shock. Ahead of her, colors erupted from Dipper's body and was seemingly sucked into the white crystal, filling it with color inversely with the color draining out Dipper's body. Mabel stared, stupefied. Soon, the light show ended, revealing a black, white and grey Dipper who stood immobile, staring blankly ahead. On the other hand, the crystal was filled with colors, orange, white, blue, green and black. "Dipper?" Mabel asked hesitantly as she stepped closer to the room's center. Suddenly the large crystal shattered and five crystals appeared, each in one of the colors of the large crystal. Mabel stared in silence, wordlessly she stepped towards the motionless and now colorless Dipper. She waved her hand in Dipper's face. There was no response. She then started to panic, frantically saying 'What do I do?' over and over again.
She eventually snapped out of her paranoia. Dropping a fist into the open palm of her other hand, she stated, "All right Mabel, think. What would Dipper do?" She surveyed the room and laid her eyes on the crystals left on the ground. She went and picked those up and ran to the still body of Dipper. "Maybe this will work." She took the blue crystal and poked Dipper with it. Nothing happened. She poked him again all over his bland body. She repeated this with the other four crystals but it yielded the same results as the blue crystal. "Okay..." She drawled. "Maybe there's something in the journal!" She glanced to the said object laying behind the flashlight. She moaned, "But I hate reading! All those big scientific words are just blarghhh" She sighed deeply. Dipper was now stuck in that black and white state and she didn't know how to fix it. Dipper said that the Journal didn't say anything about the white crystal anyways. Frustrated, she threw her hands up into the air, dropping the crystals on the white shirt on the ground. She walked to the door and opened it.
"Grunkle Stan~~" She called out. That man's always doing something so she was not surprised when there was no response from the older man. "Ugh!" She picked up the flash light and sat on the bench by their triangle window. She idly flicked it on and off as she thought about what to do to help her brother. Maybe she could find Wendy. She was pretty smart. But then again, she had no idea where the teen was. And what if something bad happens to Dipper when she left? She shifted around on the bench, and she laid on her back, her head upside down and her hair dangling due to gravity. She mindlessly shined the flash light around the room. The beamed passed by Dipper's bed, the crystals on the shirt, her bed, a mirror... wait a second. She looked at the shirt she shined the light on. The shirt had color now! Curious, she walked to the resting shirt; the shirt was now blue and black. The colors looked they had bled on the shirt, it originated from the colored crystals.
"Mabel Pines. You are a genius!" She congratulated herself with a wild grin. Randomly picking up a gem, she picked the orange one. She stepped a good 5 feet away from the immobile body and held the orange crystal on top of the head of the flashlight. With anticipation, she pointed the flashlight at her brother and turned it on. An orange beam radiated on the blank chest of the boy. Her eyes widened as she saw color seep into Dipper. The color dispersed over his clothes and slowly made its way covering the entire body. Mabel subconsciously turned off the flashlight and stared. Dipper's eyes stayed the same color but his clothes were orange and his skin was tinted with the color. He blinked.
"Agh!" Dipper jumped backwards, flinging himself away from his original position. "W-what h-happened?!"
"Dipper? You're alive!" Mabel cheered.
"M-Mabel?" Dipper said. His eyes were wide and darted around the room. He acted as if the entire room was going to attack and eat him. He rubbed his stomach gingerly. "O-oh n-no." He stuttered nervously. "I-I think I m-might." His orange tinted face had a little green. "Oh g-god!" He rushed to the triangular window, opened it and then emptied out his stomach.
"Hey!" Yelled an indignant feminine voice. He spared a second to look at the victim, Dipper suddenly rocketed back to the center of the room, dived for his bed, covered himself with a blanket and curled up. The blanket could be seen trembling.
"Uh. Dipper? You going through puberty all of the sudden or something?" Mabel asked, flashlight still in her hand. She crouched down and picked up the green one.
From the covers, Mabel could make out a panicky voice, "N-no! Well m-maybe! Y-yes, I g-guess... I-I don't know! Don't a-ask me! A-agh! I'm an i-idiot! S-stupid, stupid, s-stup-pid!" Under the twins, they heard the creaky wooden door to the shack open.
"Yo!" A voice hollered under them. "Where you guys at?"
Mabel quickly uncovered the blankets, revealing a shivering orange Dipper. He had a look of dread plastered on his face. "Maybe this'll help." She put a green crystal in front of the flashlight and turned in on. There was a green beam and Dipper changed colors. He was tinted green now. Gone was the shivering and hysteria and in its place was a sly smirk and and a wild glint in his eyes.
"Guys?" The female voice called again.
With a broad smile, 'Dipper' got out of the bed and walked down the stairs. "'Sup Wendy." Dipper said with his hands clasped behind his back. In the shack was Wendy, apparently and fortunately, Dipper's vomit had missed the girl and she was now chilling in shop. She was surveying the shop with a raised eyebrow.
Still looking around, she stated observation, "Dude, what happened to the Shack? It's like you had an all out brawl or somethin'." She scrunched her nose. "And why does it smell like rotten flesh in here? Don't say that it isn't rotten flesh. Trust me, I know, dude. Don't ask either." She finally laid her eyes on Dipper. "Woah! What's up with you, man. You sick? You're looking a little green. Not to mention, you kinda, almost threw up on me out there."
With a small smirk, Dipper replied. "Just moving some bodies out our closets. Also, I couldn't be any better now, thanks so much for asking. Hey Wendy, I'm sorry about the vomit. Apology hug?" Dipper spread his arms in askance. The smirk never disappeared.
"Sure... Dipper." Wendy also opened her arms, and let Dipper embrace her. "Dude... are you patting my butt?"
"Of course not."
They broke the hug, Dipper, still smiling, strolled to the cash register behind the counter of the shack. At that moment, Mabel came down the stairs holding a flashlight and the five crystals.
"Yo, Mabel." Wendy waved to the girl, who waved back. "What's up with Dipper?" She jabbed a thumb in the direction of the green Dipper who was dragging a trash bag towards the bathroom. It was plain to see the bills stuck in his back pockets. "He's all... green. And he's acting all weird." She subconsciously rubbed her bottom.
"Heheh." Mabel chuckled nervously. "We were exploring, found this white crystal, it sucked the color out of Dipper, then it broke into these colored crystals, then I shined the light on Dipper, then he changes." Mabel explained in one breath while moving her hands in correspondence of her explanation.
"Woah wait. Slow down. Crystals and color? What?" Wendy asked with a bemused expression.
Green Dipper strolled in the room, his hands were in his pockets and behind him trailed Waddles. The pig wore a bacon costume, on his face was a drawn mustache and a monocle. Wendy stared in silence and looked at Mabel. "Here I'll show ya." Mabel took her flashlight and the white crystal. She shined the white light onto Dipper. As did before, the beam hit Dipper and the white color started to spread across his body. His body and clothing was now tinted white. Gone was the roguish smirk and glinting eyes. Dipper now had a genuine smile and round wide eyes. He then laughed cheerfully and practically skipped out of the room.
"What the heck!" Wendy exclaimed.
"Ahem." Mabel cleared her throat. She took some of the over-sized souvenir glasses from the shop and put it on. In a slightly deeper voice, she spoke in an imitation of a professional. "According to my theory, each of these crystal have a different personality to them and shining them on Dipper will change him. So far, I have found orange is nervous and I did not see green Dipper enough. I still have black and blue."
"Those glasses are hilarious on you." Wendy said offhandedly. Seriously, she asked, "So what are we going to do with Dipper?"
Mabel took off the glasses. "I don't know." She whined. "I thought you could help."
"Hey, I just got here. I have no idea what's happening. Dipper's the one who always solves the mystery." Wendy looked with interest at Dipper. He was currently, merrily prancing around the shack. His wide eyes took fascination of everything he saw. It reminded Wendy of a little kid. She snorted as she realized he was wearing his 'Lamby' costume. "Why don't we try that black one?" She pointed to the crystal in Mabel's hand.
"Okay." Mabel took the black crystal and positioned it on the head of the flashlight. She turned it on and aimed the now black light on his brother. The change happened. Black Dipper looked down at himself. He scowled hotly and stomped up the stairs, he quickly returned with the journal in hand and stormed out.
"We should probably follow him."
"Yea..."
"My fellow friends. I have called you out from your homes for a sole purpose. We bring this town under our control, we will take over this state, the country, the continent and eventually, the world! I know, I know, we are small. But with the vast knowledge of this book in my hand, we will build our forces. And eventually. Eventually, together, we will conquer the world! The entire world will tremble before the fearsome might of Dipper Pines!" There was an ominous thunderclap as the speech was finished. He maniacally cackled and then stopped as he sneezed. To his side he could hear laughter. Furious, he turned to his offenders.
"Seriously, bro?" Laughed Mabel. She clutched her stomach as she chuckled on the ground.
"Dipper, dude, this is pretty pathetic." Wendy was bent down, her hands on her knees as she laughed.
Black Dipper was currently standing on top of a gray rock. He stood straight up tightly clutching the Journal under his left shoulder. He was scowling intensely. The scowl, however, was negated by the fact he was still wearing the 'Lamby' costume. His audience were two snoring gnomes, Shmebulock and Gompers. A truly pitiful sight.
"I. Can't. Reach. The. Zipper." He fumed. He then quickly opened the Journal, wildly flipping through the pages in the search of a spell of sorts. He was going to teach those two a lesson.
Wendy stopped laughing and remembered what they were doing. "Mabel, quick! Try the blue one!"
They shout managed to snap Mabel out of her laughter. With determination, she picked up the flashlight, positioned the crystal, turned on the currently chanting boy. Miniature, darks clouds started to from above their heads. Fortunately, the chant was not completed and the clouds cleared as Dipper stopped the chant due to his change of mind. He was now tinted blue. The now, blue boy surveyed his surroundings. "All right. I've had enough of this nonsense." He jumped off the rock carefully and landed on the ground; he walked to the two girls. He held out his hand. "Mabel hand me the crystals." Mabel reached into her pockets to pull out the other four crystals, but she was prevented from handing them over when Wendy walked between her and Dipper.
"Wait just a second." The Corduroy interjected. She put her hands on her hips and leaned forward towards Dipper. There was a frown on her face. "What personality are you? How do we know you know what you're doing?"
Dipper calmly looked at Wendy. "I'm the intelligent Dipper." He stated, as if it was obviously. He pointed to the crystals in Mabel's hand. "Unlike those fools I actually want to become 'normal' again. I'm your best chance of returning the 'real' Dipper to you."
Wendy straightened her back and crossed her arms. "Intelligence, huh. All right then. What's one plus one plus one plus one plus one times zero?"
Blue Dipper raised an eyebrow. "Four."
Wendy threw a fist in the air triumphantly. "Whoo! Take that Robbie! I was right! Suck it! Ha! Zero, my ass!" She then cleared her throat, composing herself and then nodded in approval. "Okay Mabel you can give him the crystals now."
"Thank you very much." He said. "I sincerely wished you had shone the blue crystal on me first. That would have been much easier." He looked down on himself. "I suggest we go back to the Mystery Shack. Get me out of this stupid costume."
The three returned to the shack and went up to the twin's rooms. With the assistance of Mabel, Dipper was able to get out of the costume. He positioned himself in the center of the room and looked at his two female companions. Mabel was currently sitting on her bed and Wendy was leaning against the walls of the attic with her hands in her pocket.
"Okay." Blue Dipper said. "This should work. I believe all we need to do is shine all the colors on me at the same time and I should be fixed. So first, we need to find four more flashlights."
"Got them!" Mabel said. She had reached under her bed and got out a box. The box was filled with flashlights.
"That... tha- wha- Why do you have a box of flashlights?"
"Late night disco parties. Duh."
"Yeah dude." Wendy agreed, "Nice, Mabel!" The two girls high fived.
"You know what. I don't care. Wendy, get three flashlights and Mabel, you get two." Blue Dipper instructed. "Do the same with the crystals and tape one of them on the heads of each of the flashlights." The girls followed his instructions. "Now, move back a good distance away from me, and on the count of three, shine all five of them on me." Mabel and Wendy nodded. "One, two, three!" Mabel turned on her flashlights, beaming the colors orange and green. On the other side Wendy turned her three on in quick succession, emitting black, white and lastly, blue. All the flashlights hit Dipper, and there was a swirl of colors mixing, suddenly there was a flash of bright light. Mabel and Wendy covered their eyes with their arms. When the light died down, in the center of the room stood Dipper, at his feet was multicolored dust. He looked dizzy and was smacking his lips together. More importantly, his color was back to normal.
"I-I..." Dipper looked at himself, everything was the way it should be. "Yes! I'm me again!" He smacked his lips several times. "I...I can taste the colors of the rainbow... Wow. Okay. Soos might not be that crazy." Dipper then massaged his head. "Wow. I did some stupid things."
"Yay! Dipper! You're back!" Mabel cheered.
"Yo Dip!" Wendy called.
"Mabel! Wendy!" Dipper said. His face flushed as he recalled what Green Dipper did. "Wendy... I-I'm..." Dipper stuttered.
"It's all good, dude. You weren't you. I know you."
Dipper held his arm behind his back sheepishly. "Heh heh. Right." You know, white tasted pretty good. "Oh yea! Green me took your wallet Wendy. Here."
"You... that... ah what the heck. Thanks Dip." Wendy said, accepting her wallet from a red faced Dipper.
"That was fun!" Mabel chirped.
"Right... fun..."
"All right dudes, I'm going to call it a day. See ya guys."
"Bye!" Twin voices choired. Wendy left the shack with a wave.
"It's getting dark already." Mabel said, staring out the window.
"Yeah. What a day." Dipper said. "Hey... Mabel. You probably shouldn't go in the bathroom any time soon."
"Huh? Why?"
Stan whistled contently as he walked to the bathroom. He had a newspaper tucked under his right arm. He was tired, fixing the blasted machine was much more work than he anticipated. The stomping and shouting of the kids above really didn't help either. He couldn't wait to relieve himself and then relax. With a goal in mind, he opened the door to the bathroom and walked in.
"FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! WHO TRIED TO FLUSH ZOMBIES DOWN THE TOILET?!"
AN1: Orange-Anxiety. Blue-Intelligence. Green-Mischievous. Black-Malicious. White-Innocence. The colors originate from his clothes.
AN2: There's a code below. See if you can figure it out. This apparently goes into my word count... I feel like a cheater... it gives me about 290 more words. I'll give you guys a clue to this code next chapter! If I get relatively good feedback that is... Reviews are appreciated, criticisms or compliments, it matters not.
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