lmnhtsys

Love Means Never Having to Say You're Sorry
Rating:PG/PG-13 (to be safe)
Disclaimer: If DA were another world, James Cameron (and Charles Eglee, and anyone else who owns it) would be God. Likewise, Erich Segal owns Love Story, and the infamous line Love means never having to say you're sorry.
Spoilers: Cold Comfort, The Kidz are Aiight, Female Trouble, Haven

A/N- Two things-
A. I've been writing a lot of good stories lately, but I fell like they're not going anywhere (even though I know they are). So this one's just for me, and if you don't like it, that's your problem.

B. I know you only have to skip lines if you're uploading in TEXT, not for HTML, but I've noticed it's easier to read, so I'm going to try it. Forgive me if I miss one, I'm not used to it.

Special thanks to The_Inimitable_Pooh _Bah, and True (and anyone else who responded after I checked on it again) for their very helpful information on Progeria (that's the word I was looking for!).


Max sighed, as she stared out at the sea. When all that separated her and Logan was their damned minds, that was okay. But an ocean was something else. It was like saying that she had no choice in a relationship with Logan. Of course if she had a choice, they'd just go on denying their emotions. It was just not having a choice that bothered her.

All these years, and she still thought of Logan. Like she had nothing better to do. Get over it, Max. You're safe, Logan's safe, Original Cindy's safe. Everyone knows nothing. The only person who even knows you're in Asia is Athia.

Athia. Max had gotten a chance to know one of her sibs, and she ran. Zack would be soo proud, she muttered to herself. And Zack. Even he didn't know where she was.

Maybe that was why she was so lonely. Looking at the ocean that separated Max Guevara's life and that of Annette DeAngelo, she began to cry softly. The only life she ever had was gone.

******************************
Glancing at the dirty water, Logan sighed. He wondered why Max had left.

You know why she left. Because she had to.

She had to. Of course. He wondered where she was. For all he know, she was on the other side of the ocean. All he could hope was that it was cleaner over there. And as the hoverdrone blared it's Restricted Area message, a single tear escaped his eye.

******************************
Eleven years was a long time. To Max, it seemed like an eternity since she had took off to Asia. she had settle in Jebal Ali, only to find Athia. From there, she ran. If she had to run from her life, she was running from all of it. So she had gone to China. End of story. There was so many people, it was easy to blend in. It wasn't too unlike America. Just cleaner. Slightly.

All of the sudden, she got a strange feeling in the pit of her stomach, and thought of Brin. And within minutes, before the physical signs began to show, Max knew that Brin wouldn't be the last X5 with progeria.

******************************
She thought for a long time. Her only hope was to go back to Lydecker for help. Or die. She decided that dying was the more pleasant alternative. But there was something she wanted to do. And she didn't have much time.

******************************
By the time she got to Seattle, Max had gotten weaker. She knew that time was running out. She was lucky if she had time enough to do what she needed.

Max had no car, and wasn't in the mood to steal one. She took the time to see how the city had changed. It hadn't gotten any nicer. It was like she had never left.

She walked slow to save her energy. As she approached Logan's apartment, she debated whether to knock on the door, or pick the lock. Since she didn't even know if he still lived there, she decided to knock. She didn't want to fight anyone today.

Whose there? Logan responded to the knock immediately, as if he had been waiting by the door.

It made Max happy just to hear his voice. It's me.

He opened the door, and stopped in his tracks. Max's physical signs of aging had gotten worse. Much worse. He wondered if it was all a dream. That maybe she was fine, and she'd come visit him another time.

She was almost as surprised to see him as he was to see her. He was walking, and his apartment had been completely redone.

You're up, she said, smiling.

It was nice to see her smile, even in her condition.



About five years now.

Wow. Congratulations.

Come inside.

They stood in silence. Everything was just too much for Logan. Not only to see Max, but to see her so weak. So vulnerable.

They sat down, and Logan asked the question he most feared the answer to. Are you going back?

No. I just came here. I'm not going back.

I don't know if that's a good thing... or not.

It is. Lydecker is comparable to death only because death is preferable.

Ah. Any good travel stories?

Umm... I met Athia in Jebal Ali.

Jebal Ali. Wow, you've been places.

Yeah. I ran, so I don't think she knew. Maybe she did. I just wanted to get away. So I went to China.

And you actually blended in?

Yeah. It's much more diverse there. So what's the good word in your life?

Same old stuff. Brin's out. Zack.... Zack never changed. He killed himself for being too weak. Jace went back for treatment. Manticore hasn't changed much.

Eyes Only is still going. Original Cindy found out. She picked up the whole sneaking into my apartment thing from you. She wanted to know what was up with you. I didn't know

Good. I planned it that way.

Gee, thanks.

You know it was for your own good.

They sat in silence, both contemplating life and death. Finally Max spoke up. Logan, burn me.



Burn me. When I die. Because Lydecker's a grave digger, and what's left of the Reds are grave diggers, and the world is just a bunch of freakin' grave diggers.

You were once a gravedigger yourself if I remember right.

Max was too tired to laugh. Burn me.



As the night progressed, neither said anything. It was almost an unspoken agreement. Max got weaker, and Logan could tell. Little did he know, she was using up all her energy for what she came to do.



By this time she was curled up on the couch, with her head in his lap.

I... there was a time when I didn't care about anyone but myself, and maybe my sibs. And then you came along. And Vogelsang wasn't the only number I saw on my pager. And every time I thought about you, I blocked it out of my mind. I ran off, and I met people, and I realized that my life wasn't he only reason I wanted to come back. She paused for even longer than it had been taking her before. I love you Logan.

Max, I've loved you for a long time. And you really were the most important thing in my life. And the more I thought about it, the more I realized you were right. so when I got too tied up with Eyes Only stuff, well, I'm sor-

Love means never having to say you're sorry.

I really love you Max.

She sighed. And maybe that was all she needed to hear. For when Logan looked down again, she was gone.

******************************
The fire started small, but in minutes it was blazing. Logan watched out the window of the cabin, not wanting to go back outside. It hadn't even been 48 hours since he had first seen Max again, and already he missed her. He missed thinking she was out there.

He just watched the fire, until it died down to a few flames. Then he went outside, and when the ashes were all that was left, he swept them into a pile, and dropped them over the Bast statue, in the same box he had given it to Max in.

As he grabbed a shovel, and took the box into the woods, he heard a rustling in the trees. Deciding it was nothing, he resumed digging. But he heard it again. And again.

By this time, the hole was almost finished. Come on out, he shouted. I know you're there. The silence reigned. Don't hide yourself Now was a time he wished Max were here.

He looked up again, and realized that there were nine pairs of eyes watching him.

It took a few seconds for him to realize who they were. First he recognized Tinga. Then Jondy. Then Brin. He had, over the years, seen current pictures of most of the X5s. There was only one he didn't recognize.

He sat the box in the hole, and hastily filled it back up with dirt. I'll leave you all alone.