Please be kind. I'm really going out on a limb with this one. I'm trying Jasper x Edward for the first time.
Edward was good at football. He knew football inside out, backwards, upside down. It was probably the only thing in his life that wasn't confusing anymore.
You see, Edward was just realizing that maybe; just maybe, he wasn't all that interested in women. It was odd. Edward had thought people were born gay. He thought that gay people were automatically flamboyant and just really obviously gay. But, he wasn't. He was quiet and determined and so far away from flamboyant it wasn't even funny.
Regardless of all this stereotypes Edward once had in his head, he was gay. He knew it.
Edward hadn't been gay before. This was the part that confused him. Up until last April, when spring football training began, he had been straight. He even had a beautiful girlfriend.
Then he met him. "Him" was always italicised in Edward's thoughts. At first, Edward thought of him in disdain, the italics oozing hate. Edward hated him because he made Edward second guess himself. Edward liked to think of himself as stable, rational. He clearly had both of his feet on the ground. But then he decided to move to Forks and knock Edward right off his feet, smiling the entire time. That damn smile.
After a while, the hatred left the italics and it was more of annoyance. Because he was the source of all his problems. He was the one that made Edward mess up in practice, he was the one that made Edward jump every time someone gave him a clap on the back after a good play because he was scared it would be him.
Eventually, the italics just stuck with Edward. He hardly ever said his name in his mind because the name "Jasper" caused Edward to shiver.
A lot had changed since last April. Edward and Bella, his now ex-girlfriend, broke up because "he spent too much time with his football buddies." Edward became best friends with him, even though Edward knew he wanted more than friendship, as did everyone else at school. People were practically holding their breath as they waited for Edward to come out of the closet. Edward became the starting quarter back for the Forks Spartans in his final year, and he was their best wide receiver, and their quickest runner. They were a good team whether the guys on the team liked it or not.
Even though Edward knew that he was most likely gay now, he probably wouldn't give up this kind of information. He would be a pariah after this. Had he figured this out, oh, about four years ago, it wouldn't have been a big deal. But he was a senior now, a respected senior at that, and as much as Edward hated to admit it, his social status meant a lot to him. He'd worked too hard to just give up for a boy with sunshine hair, stormy grey eyes, and a southern accent.
The Spartans had managed it to make it to State finals this year. It just so happened that their biggest rivals and their sworn enemies for life were also in the final. The La Push Wolves were good and Edward knew it would be a close game. It wouldn't seem like so close on the field, but he knew it'd be a gut-wrenching game in the stands.
Edward was practicing every day for the two weeks before finals and he was eating healthier than he ever had before. He worked out in the school gym with him every day during their ten o'clock free period. It just so happened that ten o'clock was now Edward's favourite time of day.
It was the Thursday before the final, ten o'clock, and work out time with him. Edward grunted as he bench pressed one-eighty. He was leaning against the wall, watching Edward, prepared to spot him if he needed it, which he wouldn't.
"Did you do your three mile run last night?" he asked. "I decided to do mine outside. Bad idea. I was soaked. When my Ma said it rained a lot here, I thought it meant maybe once a week."
Edward chuckled. "No, we're pretty lucky to get one dry day a week. And it's still wet outside even when it's not raining."
"I don't know how you do it, Edward," he sighed. "No wonder you're so pale. There's no sunlight to give you any colour."
"Nah, I just think I'm naturally pale," Edward said through gritted teeth. "I went to Hawaii with my family once. I burnt, and when they skin peeled away, I was still as white as a sheet."
He laughed. "Jesus, I feel sorry for you. I didn't even bother with sunscreen in Texas. I haven't burnt since I was a boy."
"I don't bother with sunscreen here," Edward teased, letting the bar settle. "Okay, you're turn, Jasper. Don't exert yourself too much."
He punched Edward playfully and slid down onto the weight punch and began pumping the one-eighty pounds up and down, just like Edward had been doing in the beginning. Edward took a drink out of his water bottle and wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. Edward hated how much he sweated compared to him. It made Edward feel out of shape.
"Are you nervous yet?" Edward asked. "I'm not really feeling it yet. Emmett was absolutely freaking out last night. It was kind of funny, actually. Mom had to calm him down. It made him feel really grown up." Edward laughed, remembering the hilarious scene that unfolded last night. Emmett was Edward's younger brother, a sophomore. But, Emmett didn't look like a sophomore. He looked like a college boy already. Everyone always mixed up their ages. Needless to say, it was hilarious to watch Edward's younger, but bigger, brother freak out and then see his mom hold Emmett own the couch and run her hands through his hair just like she used to do when he was three-years-old.
"Nah, I'm not nervous," he replied. "Football's never been my favourite sport. I'm more of a hockey guy."
"Are you going to try out for the team this year?" Edward asked. Forks had an AAA team that most of the boys played on.
"Hell yes," he grunted, finishing his rep of twenty and taking a break. "Are you?"
"Damn straight," Edward replied. "I'm left wing. What position are you?"
"D," Jasper replied, picking up the weight again. "I like to check people."
"Who doesn't?" Edward asked with a grin.
"Does La Push do triple-A?" Jasper asked, gritting his teeth.
"Yeah," Edward sighed. "We lost out in the quarters to them last year."
"Well, that won't be happening this year," Jasper decided, taking another break after twenty extra quick reps. "I hope that Jacob kid tries to get pass me. The big guys underestimate me a lot, and I love to put them in their place."
"You guys should fight in an exhibition game," Edward suggested. "I'd like to see that fight."
"I bet you would, you ass," Jasper grunted, doing his final reps as quickly as possible. He finished with a big exhale, shaking out his arms quickly and then sitting up, still straddling the bench. "How about you fight Mike during a practice then?"
"Mike won't make the team," Edward replied. "He's not even double-A material."
Jasper laughed. "Figures."
Edward grinned. "Okay, we'd better hit the showers now. You take for fucking ever."
Jasper rolled his eyes, but stood up anyway. They got into the showers in the boys locker room. There was no Phys. Ed. class at ten, so they both stripped and hopped under the lukewarm water. Edward washed himself off quickly, trying to avert his eyes from Jasper, because once Edward looked once, he knew it'd be really hard to look away again.
Jasper was an athlete. Edward knew that from the first time he saw him. He was muscular in a subtle way that most people would underestimate in sports and in fights. He was taller than Edward, but only by a little bit, probably somewhere around 6'1 or 6'2. Most of all, he carried the attitude of a winner around with him. He was confident, not cocky, and he was always optimistic. He was a leader, and that's why Jasper and Edward were co-captains this year, even though Jasper had just moved to Forks the preceding January.
Friday's ten o'clock session was the exact same. Edward wanted to tell Jasper that there was a possibility that he might just like him more than a friend, but he wasn't exactly sure how to strike up that particular conversation. Where would he mention it?
"Hey, Jasper, your form's great. I think I'm in love with you."
"Hey, Jasper, wanna pass the soap? When you look at me and smile, I feel like I'm the luckiest guy in the world."
"Hey, Jasper, I don't know if you knew this, but you're really hot."
"Hey, Jasper, Coach Clapp said we should wrestle each other today so we get used to contact. Wanna do it in the shower?"
Edward couldn't help but to laugh at the last scenario. He started chuckling, and soon enough he was laughing so hard his abs hurt.
"What the hell, Edward?" Emmett yelled, glaring at him from the couch next to him. Neither of them was allowed of the house tonight. But it wasn't because of the coach's orders; it was because of their mom. She used to be a college level volleyball player, and she took sports very seriously. "Stop laughing like that."
"Shut up, Emmett," Edward said through a chuckle.
"Edward, I swear to God, if you don't stop fucking laughing, I'll beat your ass," Emmett warned.
Edward snorted. "I'd like to see you try, asswipe."
"I'll fucking kill you," Emmett muttered. "And you won't even see it coming."
"Aw, calm down, lil' bro," Edward teased. "Just watch the damn movie and take ten deep breaths."
Emmett glared at the TV, his arms crossed. Their mother would probably chastise Edward for bugging his brother.
"I'm home!" announced Alice, Edward's twin sister. "God, that Jasper boy knows how to shop. I'm so glad he moved here."
Alice was the opposite of Edward. She had her head in the clouds and she was hyperbole. She was tiny physically, but her presence was huge when she entered the room. Everyone knew Alice.
"You went shopping with Jasper Whitlock?" Emmett asked in disgust. "God, he's such a homo."
"Shut up, Emmett," Edward growled.
Emmett chuckled and rolled his eyes. "Whatever, bro. You know he is."
"So what if he is? He's a better player than you, and that's all that counts," Edward ground out.
"Yeah, Em, shut your fucking dirty mouth," Alice snapped. "Edward, Jasper told me to tell you to text him."
Edward sighed, pretending to be annoyed, but on the inside, he was grinning from ear to ear. Alice knew how her twin brother felt about Jasper, but she never let on that she did. She just smiled and quietly left the room.
Hey, Edward sent to Jasper.
The reply was automatic. Hey, man. Ur sis jst blew like 500. How is that even possible?
Edward snorted. U obviously don't know Ali. That's a light day.
Em still nervous?
Ya, and now he's getting mean. Edward rolled his eyes. I might kill him b4 tomorrow.
Aw, take it easy on the kid. It's his first state final. And we sorta need him.
We'd be fine w/out him. Me n u combined could equal one of him.
Ha, ya. We're pretty much the team anyway. Mite as well take on 1 mor job.
Exactly.
Jasper and Edward continued texting throughout the rest of the evening, only stopping occasionally to shower or eat or do something for their parents. This is how it usually was between the two of them. They could talk for hours about anything and everything.
Edward bit his lip as he said goodnight to Jasper. He felt the need to talk to someone about all of this, to finally open up to someone. But who? Usually he'd go straight to Alice, but he had a feeling that she'd be too excited about it. He needed someone calm, someone that he trusted. He took a deep breath before dialling the digits in his phone.
"Hello?" Bella's voice answered. "Who is this?"
"It's Edward," he sighed. "I'm sorry, are you busy?"
"No, I'm just hanging out at home, doing some homework so I don't have to do it on the weekend. Mrs. Cope has us on lockdown for tomorrow." Edward could picture Bella rolling her eyes.
"Same here," Edward replied. "Listen, I, uh, I need to tell you something."
"What is it?"
"Can I trust you not to tell anyone until I'm ready for everyone to know?"
"Yes, Edward, you know I won't tell anyone anything."
Edward took a deep breath. "I think I'm gay?"
There was silence on Bella's end. Edward didn't know what to say. Should he say just kidding? No, she wouldn't buy that. Bella usually could see right through Edward.
"When did you figure this out?" Bella finally asked.
"Just a few weeks ago," Edward admitted. "But I think I was denying it for a while."
"How long do you think you've been denying it for?"
Edward hated to admit that he had probably been gay while he was dating Bella, but he couldn't lie to her. "Since Jasper moved her."
Bella sighed. "I thought so. God, that sucks. My boyfriend was gay before we broke up."
"Bella, it had nothing to do with you. I love you, you know that right?"
"Yeah," she breathed. "Just not the way you used to."
"No," Edward had to admit. "I'm sorry."
"It's alright. I just want you to be happy," Bella replied reassuringly. "Don't worry about me, I'll find someone else that'll make me just as happy."
"I know you will," Edward said with a smile. "And that makes me happy."
"I'm glad." Edward could tell Bella was smiling through the phone. "And thank you. I didn't know who else I could tell."
"You're welcome anytime, Edward," Bella reminded him. "Oh, it's my curfew. I gotta peace out. I'll see you tomorrow. Good luck."
"Thanks. Bye."
Edward plugged his cell phone into his charger and laid down in his bed. He should be asleep already, Coach Clapp wanted them to be in bed by ten, but he couldn't sleep. He was too riled up. His thoughts were moving too quickly for him to calm down even the slightest.
Before Edward knew it, the sun was rising. He didn't know if he fell asleep and dreamt or if he just stayed up all night thinking. Either way, he was still feeling apprehensive.
Edward sighed and sat up, scratching his stomach and yawning. Today was the big day. He didn't feel overly nervous, which was good. He went for a quick run in his boxers. It was only seven in the morning after all. Then he showered quickly and came into the kitchen to eat the "healthy" breakfast his mom had prepared for him and Emmett. Bacon was a must on game days, according to their mother.
Emmett was chowing down, looking more insane than the homeless guy on Main Street in town. Edward clapped him on the back and murmured, "You'll do fine, bro." Emmett grunted and continued eating like a pig.
The morning passed uneventfully. Edward did his homework quickly and packed his bag. His father came home at noon and they ate a light lunch together. Dr. Cullen had once been a football fanatic himself. That's how he'd met Mrs. Cullen. She was his cheerleader in high school.
"You boys ready?" Dr. Cullen asked. "Emmett, are you going to be okay?"
"Yeah, I'll be good," Emmett answered. He looked semi-green.
"Okay, good luck, boys." Dr. Cullen smiled at his sons proudly. "Make me proud, alright? Hold up the family name for me."
"Will do, Dad," Edward answered.
They arrived at the field and suited up with the rest of the team. The only people that didn't look like they were carrying the weight of the world on their shoulders were Edward and Jasper.
"Calm down, ladies," Coach Clapp announced when he entered the dressing room. "It's just La Push. We know them as well as we know our own team. Don't let the fact that this is States mess with your head. Let's just play like we can, you hear me?"
"Yes, Coach," they all replied.
"Now get running."
Sooner rather than later, the stands filled up and the other team arrived, warming up just like the Spartans were. The rivalry was thick in the air and if the opposing team so much as looked at the Spartans, they'd stare them down, giving them their best death glares. It was going to be a tough game.
"You ready, Captain?" Jasper asked Edward, slapping his back with an easy grin.
"Yeah. You ready, Captain?" Edward mimicked.
"Hell yeah. Let's start destroying some bodies."
Forks won the toss, so they received the kick. A great way to start the final football game. The game was hard from the beginning. The Spartans and the Wolves both had an amazing defence, making it quite hard for the offence to get very far away from the middle of the field. Eventually, Jasper opened up and Edward threw a perfect spiral to him. They got a touchdown, and then the field goal. By half-time, the Spartans were up seventeen to three. It was a good game for them.
Everyone was jittery with excitement and nerves in the locker room. Coach Clapp gave them some tips, but was extremely proud of his boys for really pulling it out.
The Spartans came back on the field with the humble confidence that Coach Clapp had taught them to carry whenever they were winning.
The game continued. The Wolves really came full throttle in the second half. They got two touchdowns and they were only three behind the Spartans now.
"Okay, boys," Edward murmured in their huddle. "Let's get another touchdown, alright? Then we have this game in the bag! One, two, Spartans."
The offensive line jogged out of the huddle. Jasper and Edward shared a meaningful look. The Wolves hadn't really caught on that Jasper was their best receiver. Edward had avoided using him so that when the time finally came to push it, Jasper would be their secret weapon.
"Hike," Edward called. The players were off. Jasper sprinted down the field, followed by a bigger guy. The wolf didn't have a chance. Edward threw, Jasper caught, and he ran like a gazelle for the next twenty-five yards, dodging players and getting another touchdown. All they had to do was run the clock out now.
Emmett went out, determined to make a play. He bagged the quarter back and then covered the fumble. Edward could hear his parents screaming in the stands.
"Nice job, bro," Edward said, slapping his helmet.
"Thanks, man," Emmett replied, grinning ear to ear.
The Spartans messed around with the Wolves for the last ten seconds. When the clock ran out and the ref announced the winner, the team went berserk. Edward threw his helmet in the ear and gave a war yell. His team lifted him up and they carried him around the field. Jasper and Edward got the trophy and kissed it.
"Spartans, Spartans, Spartans!" the crowd chanted.
It was a good day. Nothing could have possibly made it better for Edward.
That night at the winner's circle party, Edward and Jasper both got drunk. They were the captains and they deserved to let loose after an entire season of being serious most of the time. The entire team was there, and pretty much all of Forks High School as well. It was a big party, and Jasper was soaking it up.
Edward, on the other hand, wanted to be alone. With Jasper in particular. All this liquid confidence was going to waste because he couldn't even get Jasper to look at him. Such a damn social butterfly. Such a tease, Edward thought glumly. Maybe Jasper wasn't gay. Maybe everyone just said that because they didn't know him and were jealous.
Edward sighed and stood up, leaving the house for some fresh air. No one was outside tonight. It was a cold November night in Forks. That's exactly how Edward liked it. Quiet, cold, and lonely.
"Edward?" a voice asked, closing the door behind it. "What're you doing out here? It's freezing."
Edward shrugged. "Needed some fresh air, I guess."
"Yeah, me too." Jasper leaned against the railing on the porch beside Edward. "It's a beautiful night, even if my balls are shrinking."
Edward laughed shortly, and then became serious again. "Jasper, I just gotta ask. Are you gay?"
Jasper burst out laughing. Edward felt ashamed. Of course Jasper wasn't gay. They were just friends. Only friends, and that's all they'd ever be. Edward couldn't help but to feel extremely sad about this fact.
"Of course I am, Edward," Jasper replied. "I didn't exactly hide it when I came to Forks."
"What?"
"Didn't you hear everyone talking about it?" Jasper asked. "God, I've been in the rumour mill since I got here."
"I didn't hear anything about that," Edward mumbled. He'd been out of the loop since he and Bella broke up.
"Well, I am." Jasper paused, thinking about what he was going to say next. "Why do you ask now?"
Edward became uncomfortable. "Um..."
"Come on, spit out," Jasper urged. He'd been waiting too long for this to watch Edward choke on his own tongue.
"I think I love you?" It was a question.
Jasper grinned. "You think so, huh?"
Edward nodded and smiled weakly at Jasper. Jasper smiled back and threw his arm over Edward's shoulder, leaning into his ear.
"I think I love you, too," Jasper whispered huskily, licking the shell of Edward's ear.
Edward gasped his eyes wide.
"You do?"
Jasper nodded, the tip of his nose brushing along the sensitive skin behind Edward's ear. "I've been thinking about you since I got here."
"Me too," Edward breathed. He turned and caught Jasper's lips in a moment of boldness.
It was the best kiss Edward had ever received in his life from the person he loved the most in his life.
Aw. Okay, okay, it wasn't completely slash, but baby steps, right?