'I close my eyes, then I drift away,
Into the magic night I softly say.
A silent prayer, like dreamers do,
Then I fall asleep to dream my dreams of you.'
- Roy Orbison-
Fenris paced his empty mansion. His teeth were clenched together, his lips formed a scowl. Hawke had dragged him out on some asinine mission for the abomination, something about some ingredient down in the sewers that was usually hard to come by. All Fenris knew was that now he was covered in filth and in desperate need for a bath. It hadn't helped the fact that he had been trapped in the company of those infernal mages, talking endlessly about potions, how to accurately summon a difficult spell, and other mage things. Fenris had been content to drown their talk out by focusing on the trek through the sewer. Occasionally though he would notice the abomination touch Hawke's shoulder in an overly friendly manor, or attempt to hold her gaze for too long. This would make Fenris even more agitated. He wasn't sure why, Hawke could cast her attentions wherever she wanted, she didn't belong to anyone. Though he would prefer if the person she choose weren't the pompous abomination.
Though every time Anders would touch her she would brush his hand off, and cast her eyes back to Fenris following behind before continuing on her way. Every time she looked at him like that it would temper his anger a bit.
Fenris collapsed in a chair that wasn't completely falling apart. His fireplace was alive with a large fire, warming the room. He was still having a difficult time adjusting to the colder nights in Kirkwall, even though he had been here for years at this point. So when he was home he always had the fire stoked.
He sighed and started to undo his gauntlets and begin the task of removing his armor when he heard the sound of his front door opening. He quickly tensed and listened closely to the shuffling feet making their way towards his stairs.
"Fenris?" Came a soft call from the base of his stairs.
Hawke.
Fenris closed his eyes, letting the tension that had crept into his shoulders ease away. "I am in here Hawke." He called continuing pulling at the straps of his gauntlets. Why was she here this late at night? By herself no less. She had no sense of self preservation. This made him purse his lips even more as she strode into his room wearing the thick green cloak she always wore when the weather turned cold. The white fur trim along the edges made her skin seem even paler by comparison, but the green brought out the deep forest of her eyes. He enjoyed when she wore it, not that he ever told her.
As she pulled her hood down she shook out her long blond hair, running her hand through it. "I was just in the neighborhood and figured I would stop by to thank you for coming with me today." She said as she eased herself into a chair opposite him. He wasn't really expecting her thanks as he watched her lean back into the seat sighing contentedly, stretching out her legs. "There is no need to thank me. I wasn't doing anything with my time today and you asked." He said bluntly. He wasn't going to tell her how he almost always said yes when she asked him to accompany her anywhere. "Still," She said gently, "I was glad to have you there with me."
He quirked an eyebrow at her, his blank mask forgotten for an instant before settling back into place. Hawke began to finger at the edge of her cloak, looking around the room as she spoke. "I just wanted to have a bit of a buffer against Anders and his...advances." Her face dissolved into a grimace as she said this.
Fenris felt the corner of his mouth start to quirk up in pleasure. Glad that he wasn't the only one annoyed with the mages actions towards her. "Maybe you should be more firm with him about his feelings towards you, if you find them so unpleasant." He absently reached for a bottle of wine he had brought up earlier, and poured himself a glass. He gestured towards an empty glass near Hawke, when she nodded her approval he poured one for her as well.
She let out a heavy sigh as she reached for the glass. "I've tried to be as direct as I can without hurting him, but nothing I do seems to deter him for long," she took a small sip of wine before continuing, "Not that Varric or Isabella have helped the situation..." She set the glass back on the table and leaned back in her chair, shutting her eyes. Fenris was sure not many people got to see Hawke with her defenses down like this. She was always putting forth a mask, be it as a fighter, sister, daughter, or friend. The need to be there for everyone around her must take a toll.
"Why," He drawled looking at her over the rim of his glass. "Have they been spreading rumors again?" Hawke opened her eyes to stare at his crumbling ceiling. "You could say that..." She said softly. "They may have said something to Anders about my being...interested in someone." Hawke seemed to be very interested in the wall to the left of her as she stared at it hard, Fenris noticed her face redden slightly.
"Yes, I could see how that could be a problem...Well just tell him that it's not true." He said attempting to sound as uninterested as he could.
Hawke shuffled a bit in her seat and turned to look him in the eye. "What if it was true?" Fenris felt his heart sputter in his chest. "What if there was someone I was interested in?"
He tried to keep the shock from his face as he quickly kept the multitude of questions he had from pouring out. "I-I suppose that would be your business..." He fingered the glass in his hand watching the wine swirl around the bottom. Faces of several people he knew that were interested in Hawke flew in front of his eyes as he tried to guess who it could be. The name that kept coming back to him was Sebastian, since she had said earlier how she didn't enjoy Anders' attentions. It made sense, Sebastian was of noble blood, like Hawke, and he was a gentleman.
He wasn't a runaway elven slave hiding in a stolen mansion, he thought bitterly.
Hawke suddenly leaned forward to rest her forearms on her knees. "Yes, I suppose it is..." She looked Fenris directly in the eye, making him want to squirm in his seat. "What do you think I should do though Fenris? I am a bit tired of these rumors and maybe I should finally put a stop to them by working things out with this person. Should tell them how I feel?"
Fenris was confused as to why she would come to him for advice in this, though he did like to feel of use to her this wasn't really his area of experience. The look on her face though was so expectant though, she was clearly eager to hear his answer. He sighed, feeling uncomfortable. "I suppose being honest about such things would help you with your problems, yes." He looked down at his lap as he said this, only looking up when he heard her shift in her seat. He looked at her through his hair. She had moved so she was leaning back again, she rested her chin on her curled fist, her eyebrows furrowed at his words.
"Yes, you're right. I should be honest with him..." She trailed off looking lost in her own thoughts.
Fenris didn't expect to feel so unhappy with her decision, she deserved to try and be happy with someone she was interested in. The thought of her with another man though...was something that weighed heavily on his mind. As he watched her face, frowning in thought, he let his thoughts wander to the smiles she sometimes sent his way when she showed him something she thought he would enjoy. The way she would come to his mansion several times a week, a basket of food in tow, complaining about how skinny he was. How she would patiently listen to his ranting about mages only to offer her view point to him calmly.
His favorite moments thought were the few times it would just be the two of them, walking from the hangman towards Hightown. They would sometimes talk about the day's events, their companions, or they would slip into a companionable silence. During these walks it felt as if there was no one else but the two of them. When they would come to Hawke's door Fenris would feel reluctant to leave, craving more of her company.
He would never let her know how much space she took up in his thoughts.
How much he cared about this sweet, quiet mage in front of him. The irony of it made him chuckle quietly, making her look up at him. He had spent so much time hating and running from mages. Only to have one take ownership of his heart.
He was broken from his reverie by Hawke standing up and moving slowly to stand close to him. He looked up at her feeling confused by her nearness. She slowly, tentatively, reached a hand out. Achingly slow, she reached forward to brush her hand through the hair that fell over Fenris' eyes. His breath hitched in his chest at the gentle contact, his mind was completely blank. He just watched her face, a face which was filled with a variety of emotions. Fear, longing, and something like hope. Hawke's hand moved from his hair to slowly run down the side of his face, the contact feather light, just skimming across. This was enough to make Fenris' heart to hammer inside his chest. He reached up and took hold of her wrist, caging it in his hand. Her eye's widened slightly but she didn't break their eye contact.
Fenris, still holding onto her wrist, stood up from his chair. He held her gaze as he stepped so close that he could feel her warmth. A voice in the back of his mind was protesting, that this was no happening. She couldn't be...
His voice was deep and rough with quiet emotion as he looked at her imploringly. "Hawke...I..."
She brought her free hand up to cup the side of his face, her breath quickening. "You said I should be honest...I could not think of sufficient words to describe what I need to say." He saw tears start to pool in her eyes, as her voice started to shake with emotion. "Fenris, I...I just..." She looked lost for words as she looked into his eyes. "...please..."
With that Fenris lost himself.
His mouth was on hers before he could think. He pulled her flush against him, his arm wrapping around her waist as he heard a low hum sound from her as she kissed him back. Her fingers wound into his hair pulling him closer as he deepened the kiss, parting her lips with his tongue, a low growl starting in his chest. He groaned as they pulled away from each other. She eyes were filled with want, and her lips were full and swollen from his assault. As he held her close, he leaned in to kiss down her neck, biting gently, listening to her soft whimpers as she clutched at his shoulders. "Ah, Fenris..." She quivered as he ran a hand down her back, pulling her closer so she could feel his desire for her.
Pulling back to look at her face, which was flushed, her lips parted. His breath was coming in pants as he moved to cup her breast through her robes. "Say it again Hawke, say my name." he demanded.
She licked her lips before she wrapped around the back of his neck pulling him closer once again. Just before their lips met she whispered. "Fenris."
He groaned as she reached back to start working on the straps of his armor, his fingers working at the ties to her robes and cloak. "Fenris...Fenris..." She repeated as he pulled back, his chest plate falling away, he began pulling her robes down from her shoulders. He took a further step back as her robes feel away in one smooth motion. He ran his eyes over her body, like a starving man who just had a feast laid before him. Her skin was pure ivory, the moonlight coming in from a hole in his ceiling made it appear luminescent. The pale blond of her long blond hair made her look ethereal. She moved her hands to reach up at remove his shirt, he leaned down to plant kisses along her jaw, her neck, and her shoulders. She began to chant his name again, as his hands began to explore her body.
"Fenris...Fenris..." Her sweet voice rang in his ears spurring on his bold actions, her smooth skin shivering under his calloused hands. Her voice growing louder, and louder.
"FENRIS!"
Fenris jumped forward out of the chair he had fallen asleep in, his lyrium flashing in surprise.
Hawke was standing in the doorway to his room, leaning against the door frame. "There you are, I've been trying to wake you for a few minutes now." She leaned down to grab a basket from the floor. "I brought over some dinner, I figured wandering around with Anders worked up your appetite, didn't know you were so tired though." She moved over to the table to set the basket down.
Fenris was trying to control his breathing as he calmed himself down. "Hawke, you shouldn't do that. I could have harmed you."
Hawke seemed to be ignoring him as she laid the basket filled with various foods on the table, humming to herself.
She turned to face him smiling at him. "You seemed like you were dreaming though," She reached down into the basket and pulled out a few nuts and popped one in her mouth. "You were moaning and twitching, must have been a nightmare." She walked forward her hand outstretched offering him some nuts.
He looked down at her, a shadow of a smile coming to his lips. "Yes," He said plucking one from her hand. "So it would seem."
