Heat', A Hellsing Snippet

by Loxxi

Pip was a virgin, and when Seras bit him he became a Vampire. Seras is in 'Heat', according to Alucard. Alucard has become a huge pervert. Seras doesn't like it, and kills him for it. But this..THIS has gone to far. Gore, Dark humor. C: Enjoy. Making a story. Will put it up as I please.

A Hellsing snippet on Police Girl's..*ahem*..problems with Alucard. xD

I do NOT own Hellsing or any of it's characters.

Here she was, in front of Sir Integra's desk, demanding that Alucard be sealed away for a long while. She honestly had no clue what was going on, all she knew was that she was in 'heat'-according to what the ancient vampire said. It had all began when they found out Pip was a virgin, thus turning him into a vampire. Alucard would grope her in public, sexually harass her when she was training, peep on her when she bathed, and molested her repeatedly in her sleep. It ended with several blown off heads, a dozen shots in the chest, and finally-his manhood blown off beyond repair, courtesy of her Harkonnen.

"What did he do now?" Integra rubbed her temples, trying to fight off an oncoming headache.

"He suggested a fucking groupie-while STRIPPING-on the damn training grounds, IN FUCKING FRONT of most of our soldiers!" Seras all but yelled.

"And what did you do to him?" Integra sighed, taking a drag of her cigar.

"I made sure a nice hole was punched in through the middle of his face, shot him eight times in the chest with his Jackal, and blew his testicles CLEAR OFF his body with my Harkonnen." Seras began in a calm voice, ending with a loud growl. Alucard then manifested behind her, his hand going to grope her, and she pulled out his Jackal, the barrel under his chin. "And I'm about to blow his brain out." She snarled, causing Alucard to grin like a madman.

The End. Maybe.

So how'd'ya like it? xD Hilarious? xD I personally think so..I couldn't get it off my head, so I had to write this, or else I might have incorporated Hellsing into my Naruto fanfic. xD