Hi, friends! Guess who's back? Me!... Obviously. I am thinking - hoping - that this story will be awesome and you will love it. So, I got this idea while looking through some Dungeons and Dragons book-things. I don't own Dungeons and Dragons by the way. Oh, and if you didn't know from my other stories, I don't own Hetalia.
Lovino had been separated from the others. This was bad. Of course, it was never a good idea to get separated from your friends in a forest, but it was worse because the forest was really creepy. Creepy like oh-god-something-is-gonna-jump-out-of-nowhere-and- eat-me-creepy. The tress seemed to loom over the frightened Italian, and all sorts of animals were calling out.
"A-Antonio? Feliciano?" Lovino looked around. He took a breath trying to clam himself, "Okay, if you're lost you're supposed to stay where you're at, right? You're not not supposed to panic, so stay calm, Lovino." he bit his bottom lip, "Someone will notice I'm gone, and they'll look for me, right?"
There was a rustle from a bush, and Lovino froze... Until the bush growled. The Italian ran for his life.
Hopefully, he would run into the others...
Antonio had forced the group to come to a halt. Someone was missing... His adorable, tsundere boyfriend was missing.
"Veh! How did we not notice fratello was missing?!" Feliciano cried out, "Where could he be?! What if he's been eaten or something? What if we never find him?"
"Feliciano, I'm sure Lovino is fine." Ludwig stated trying to comfort his friend, "As long as he stays where he is, we're bound to find him, alright?"
Al-Alright. The Italian nodded.
"Good." The German nodded, "Now calm down. Panicking won't solve anything. It'll only make the situation worse, understand?"
"Si." Feliciano nodded.
"So, should we just backtrack?" Antonio asked, "We need to find him quickly. What if he's gone off somewhere?"
"Ja, we'll backtrack. Hopefully, we'll find him and he hasn't run off. If he has run off somewhere than," Ludwig paused, "I hope he's okay."
"Luddy, are you even worried about my fratello?" The younger Vargas asked noting the German didn't seem concerned at all.
"Of course I am, Feliciano." Ludwig stated, his frown deepening, "I know I probably don't seem bothered, but I am. It's just best to think with a clear head, okay?"
"Can we go now, ¿por favor?"The Spaniard was obviously fretting.
"Ja. Ja." Ludwig sighed as they began their search for Lovino Vargas.
Unfortunately, the older Vargas had ended up even more lost... At least, that's what Lovino thought at first... Then he noticed an oddly shaped rock.
"Ugh! I've been fucking walking in goddamn circles!" The lone Italian groaned and sat on the rock, "I'll never get out of here OR find the others!" he sighed, "Why couldn't the potato bastard get lost instead?" he sniffed, "This is the last time I listen to that fatass American, damn it."
Flashback... Sorry
"Say, are any of you guys busy today?" Alfred asked as he sat in his usual seat at the usual table in the loud and crowded library.
"No, why?" Francis asked. The group had already discussed that they had no plans after school.
Well~ Alfred began, "I thought it would be fun to explore the forest behind my house."
"Eto, Alfred-san, what is someone else owns that and they don't want people trespassing?" Kiku questioned.
"Veh~ I think it would be fun." Feliciano smiled brightly, ignoring his Japanese friend's question, "Plus, I'm tired of doing the same thing everyday. Luddy and fratello will come, too." he looked from Ludwig to Lovino, "Right?"
Lovino scowled, "Absolutely no-"
"Ja." Ludwig interrupted the older Italian.
The German's answer made Lovino QUICKLY change his, "Well, if the potato bastard is going, than so am I. I gotta make sure he doesn't defile my brother."
"Well, if Lovi's going, than I am, too~" Antonio chimed, "Anywhere he goes, I go."
... "Fucking stalker."
Gilbert was next to agree, "I have to make sure mein bruderlein doesn't get in trouble."
"And I have to make sure GILBERT doesn't get in trouble." Francis sighed.
"I'm too awesome to get in trouble."
"Hm, well, since all of them are going, I suppose I will, too. Arthur stated.
"I'm quite curious about that forest." Yao began, "It's been giving off some odd vibes, right, Kiku? You'll come to check it out, too, right?"
Kiku sighed, "As you wish. I suppose I will." he smiled, "After all, I, too, am tired of doing the same thing everyday."
"So, we are all going, da?" Ivan smiled, "That is good. It would be bad if someone was left out."
Matthew sighed quietly, "I never said if I was going or not..."
"Well, you live with Alfred, da? So, I'm almost 100% sure you will agree." Ivan stated.
"Hey, commie, who ya talking to?" Alfred questioned.
"Your brother, you capitalist pig." The Russian replied.
"Why I oughta-"
"So immature." Yao sighed, "Can't you two act more mature during the last few days of school. Ivan, you're a senior for goodness sake. Alfred, I understand you're only a sophomore, but so is Ludwig. Can't you act a little more like him?"
No." Alfred replied instantly, pouting.
"Tch. Alfred, you git, why do you have to be so bloody annoying."
"Because I enjoy getting on your nerves, Artie."
Feliciano blinked, "Veh~ Lovers have odd ways of showing they care, especially here. Nobody ever acted like this back home in Italy." he paused, "Everyone was very honest about their feelings."
Antonio grinned, "I'd love to see Lovino being honest about his feelings."
"That's like asking my to fucking dye my hair blonde." Lovino huffed, "Not gonna happen. Ever." (2p reference? ;D)
"Antonio, I'll never understand how you fell for that tsundere brat." Gilbert sighed, "How the hell did you even figure out that he's in love with you?"
"Actually, he accidentally let it slip one night." The Spaniard replied, "We were kind of arguing over nothing, and he just blurted it out."
"Doesn't he break up with you, like, every other day?" Francis raised an eyebrow.
"¡No! It's not that often, and when it DOES happen, he doesn't mean it, so we ALWAYS get back together." Antonio answered, "Besides, most of the time it's because I say something stupid, but Lovi knows how much I love him."
Gilbert rolled his eyes in disgust, and Francis nodded knowingly.
Lovino was blushing slightly, "Uh, hello? Can we NOT talk about me like I'm not fucking here, damn bastards?"
"Now you know how I always feel." Matthew stated.
"Well, there ARE the select few of us who fucking notice you." Lovino pointed out, "So, you're not completely invisible. Now stop feeling so emo, damn it. It's annoying have to cheer you up every goddamn second of the day."
The Canadian smiled, "Yea. You're right. Thanks, Lovi."
"Tch. Yea. Whatever." Lovino scowled, "I-It's not like I purposely try to make you feel better, damn it, so-So-Yea. There's really no goddamn reason to fucking thank me."
Flash forward... Most of this chapter is in a flashback...
Alfred, Arthur, Francis, Matthew, Yao, Ivan, Kiku, Gilbert, Feliciano, Ludwig, Antonio, and Lovino were standing outside the woods behind Alfred's house.
"So, I figure if we split up, the exploration will go faster." Alfred stated, "And the hero already planned this. Three groups of four. he looked around, "Group one will consist of me, Artie, Francis, and Mattie. Group two is made of Gilbert, Yao, Ivan, and Kiku. Finally, group three has Feli, Ludwig, Lovino, and Antonio."
"Bloody git, why the bloody hell do I have to trudge through the godforsaken woods with you and frog-face?" Arthur glared, "Matthew is one thing, but I hate you and that bloody frog."
"Tch. And why do I have to go around with Ivan?" Gilbert snapped, "I haven't got a problem with Yao or Kiku, but that Russian is completely unawesome!"
"I'd rather dye my fucking hair BLUE than spend hours around the goddamn potato bastard!" Lovino exclaimed.
Alfred frowned, "Uh, one complaint at a time please. Okay, let's see..." he paused, "Um, Arthur, grin and be British. Gilbert, grin and be awesome. Lovino, grin and there's an image that I'll never get out of my head." he nodded, "Any more complaints? Questions? Concerns?"
"This is probably a bad idea, Al." Matthew spoke up.
"Hai, I agree." Kiku nodded, "I have a bad feeling about this."
"Let's just get this over with." Ludwig sighed.
"Veh~ Where's you sense of adventure?" Feliciano chirped, "It's not like we'll get attacked or anything."
"Yea. Besides, aren't all of you tired of being bored?" Antonio questioned, "This could be fun."
"Antoine, you think everything is fun." Francis sighed.
"Can we just go now, aru?" Yao huffed impatiently.
"Hahaha! Of course!" Alfred nodded and the three groups went there separate ways. Gilbert's group went in a Northeast-ish direction, Alfred's group went North, and Ludwig's group went Northwest-ish.
After about fifty minutes of death, the Italian's in group three wanted to take a break.
"At least a short one. Please, Luddy?"
"We're not goddamn soldiers, bastard. W can't go on forever."
"We haven't ever been going at this for an hour."
"Oh, Ludwig, surely a short break wouldn't hurt anything."
"I'd rather get this over with as soon as possible."
"Fucking potato bastard, don't make me beg."
"Fine, fine, A short break. Get ready to leave in ten minutes."
Lovino gratefully sighed and sat on an oddly shaped rock while Feliciano simply plopped down on the ground. Antonio smiled and sat on a stump beside Lovino's rock, "Isn't this fun, Lovi?"
"No." Lovino frowned, "I've got fucking rock in my goddamn shoes, there are godforsaken bugs ever-fucking-where, it's really dark in here, and I feel like I'm being watched, damn it."
"Lovino, you DO realize you didn't have to come, right?" Ludwig sighed, "You could've stayed back."
"And let you defile my little brother?" Lovino retorted, "I don't think so."
"How many times do I have to tell you that there's nothing between me und Feliciano?"
"You must think I'm fucking blind or something. I've seem the way you two damn idiots look at each other."
"Fratello, you're being ridiculous." Feliciano stated, "Luddy and I are just friends."
"Friends that want to be more than just friends."
"Don't worry, Lovi. They'll figure it out eventually." The Spaniard spoke up, "Hopefully."
"Idiot. I WANT them to stay the hell away from each other not become fucking boyfriends even though EVERYONE - including me - knows that they'll hook up sooner or later, damn it."
Feliciano blinked in confusion, and Ludwig blushed. The German coughed, "I-I'm going to go ahead. Follow after in five minutes." he walked off.
Lovino yawned, "Or we could follow after never." he sighed, "I really should have stayed home though."
Feliciano giggled, and Antonio smiled. the younger italian stood up, "I'm gonna go ahead and find Luddy." he skipped away.
"Just tell me when you're ready to go after them, okay?" Antonio smiled at Lovino.
"You go ahead." Lovino ordered.
"But-"
"Now."
"... Alright."
End of flashback... Yay!
Lovino frowned, "Then I guess I dozed off... It's official. I hate naps." he looked around and noticed a sitting on the ground in front of a tree, "That wasn't there before, was it?" he stood up and walked over to it. He knelt down and tried to open it. Surprisingly, it wasn't locked, and he opened it without a fight. Inside was a note.
Lovino Vargas,
Yes, we know it was you who found this, which is good. Inside this chest are
things that will help you in this world. The only way to get back to your world
is by saving this one from the evil that is trying to take over.
Good luck to you and your friends.
"What other things? This was the only-" Lovino took a second look into the chest, "What?"
The chest now held clothes, tools, and weapons or sorts. There was also another piece of paper that looked like a list. Picking it up, the Italian read it.
Lovino Vargas - Thief
-Armor
Chest - Tunic of Assassination
Hands - Master Thief's Gloves
Feet - Silk Boots of Theft
Head - Hood of the Tsundere
Legs - Leggings of the Italian
-Weapons
Dagger - Dirk
Short sword/One handed - Darkmare Blade
-Title
The Foulmouthed Tsundere
-Other
Housebreak harness
Lantern
Backpack
Thieves' Picks and Tools
"What the fuck?" Lovino was terribly confused. Should he go along with it or completely ignore the strangeness of it all? After all, someone could be playing a prank on him. Besides, the note said he was in a different world. That was absolutely crazy. And what was that about saving this world to go back? Nonsense. He chose to ignore it until he turned around only to see some sort of ugly creature. The bipedal monster stood around six feet tall, even though it was bending over and hunching its shoulders. It had short spindly legs, long arms that nearly reached its ankle, and a large pot belly. It had three fingers and a thumb on each hand and each ended in razor-sharp claws. Its body was covered by tufts of thick, wiry, black hair. It's head was almost equine in shape, but it had large, blood-red eyes. It also had large fangs, one protruding downward from each side of its mouth.
The monster - known to most as an Ettercap - leaped towards the Italian aiming to strike with its razor-sharp claws. Lovino quickly grabbed the sword - which he guessed was the Darkmare Blade - from the chest and stabbed the monster with one emotion - fear.
"Th-The hell was THAT thing?" A wide-eyed Lovino was about to start panicking. He glanced at he sword in his trembling hand and then at the chest laying motionless on the ground. He frowned, "Well, when in Rome, do as the Romans do. When in a forest with weird monsters, do what the note tell you." he sheathed the sword and removed everything from the chest. He replaced his shirt with the Tunic of Assassination, his pants with the Leggings of Italians, and his shoes with the Silk Boots of Theft. Then he put on the Master Thief's Gloves and the Hood of the Tsundere. He put his other clothes, the lantern, the housebreak harness, and the thieves' picks and tools in the backpack. Finally, he equipped the scabbards with the Darkmare Blade and dirk and slung the backpack over his shoulder. He scowled, "Ugh. I feel so fucking ridiculous, but I should find the others. Hopefully they won't question this get-up though."
End of Chapter
Poor Lovino... He has no luck. He's an unlucky thief!
If you notice any typos, I'll give you a cookie with my name on it!
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