Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, he is the property of JK Roweling, Warner Brothers, etc. I have made no profit through the writing of this story.

Summery: The musings of a Hogwarts Professor years after The Golden Trio have left.

History

History always has a habit of repeating itself. You know I never used to believe that. Funny how life has a way of proving one wrong. I spent my youth hearing stories of the first war, and those who sacrificed their lives to stop the threat. I always assumed that if the time should come, I would be like them. And I was called the brightest of my age.

There were similarities even when we were children. The three of us were inseparable, the center of Gryffindor. I should have suspected something then, that there was more to our meeting then simply chance. We grew closer over the years and more joined our group. Life was harmonious, for a while. I started to suspected him shortly after our fifth year. Something was off about the way he was acting. I never said anything though, he was our friend after all. Sometimes I truly curse my willingness to trust. Not him, but those that told me to trust.

The wedding was the next thing that should have set me off that fate had a plan but I was so happy for them. The days were dark then and any amount of happiness should have been enjoyed to its full potential. I knew they didn't love each other though, at least not in that way. She was in love with him. I convinced her to not follow her emotions, to do the expected thing. How foolish was I? He was no better. My best friend for seven years, I knew him as well as I knew myself. He didn't love her, but she was pregnant and needed someone to care for her and the child while they were in hiding. I had to hold his lover in my arms as she sobbed that night. It seems the bride wasn't the only pregnant woman in the chapel that day.

They went into hiding shortly after that, my other best friend their secret keeper. Or so I thought. Turns out they made a switch at the last moment, thinking someone would suspect. They were right, all the world thought that our best friend, my lover, was their keeper. They instead choice the least expected person to keep them safe. The bastard betrayed us.

I was tempted to hunt him down, to avenge my friends deaths, but someone got there first. The bastard and six others died that night and my last remaining friend sent to Azkaban for murder. A child was left guardian less that night, and the dark lord fell to an infant for the second time. It is strange who the most feared creature in all the wizarding world has died twice, and both times it was by a small child of the Potter family. Although, she wasn't really a Potter was she? Neither was her father for that matter.

They sent her to live with her only 'acceptable' relatives, her mother's brother Percival. I loath that man to this day for taking away my godchild. But the ministry didn't see fit to give guardianship to the 'girl who lived' to a filthy mudblood. I had lost everything in a single night. My three closest friend, my goddaughter, my love. They struck the night they knew the entire wizarding world would be watching the union of the Malfoy and Parkinson houses. The bastard knew that, that is why he orchestrated it for that night. Slimy, filthy little thing. Couldn't get the girl so he betrayed us all. Personally, I hope Finnegan is rotting in hell as I speak, the bastard deserves nothing less.

It has been twelve years though, one would think that I would be over it by now. I'm not. Everyday I teach the children of those I once knew, and it hurts. If half of the children knew their true lineage I do not think any would be quick to judge. Or if they knew that the most hated Professor was actually a spy. Or that I was not as human as I appear. These halls hold as many secrets now as they ever did when I attended.

Soft foot falls echoed through the empty classroom as I sat behind my desk, looking over lecture planes. Glancing up I saw a shy red headed girl of about thirteen staring worriedly at me. "Yes, Miss Potter?" I drawled as I lay my papers down. Scurrying to the front of the class room she looked up at me with large doe eyes filled with tears. "Lilly, what ever is the matter?" No matter my position I still held a soft spot in my heart for this little wisp of a girl.

"Pro-Professor Lo-Longbottom, told me to serve detention with you tonight." she whispered as a guilty look crossed her face. Giving a sigh, I gave her a look that said 'continue'. "I didn't do anything too horrible I swear! I only spilt too much newt eye into the potion we were making." I almost wanted to laugh. Who would have thought that clumsy Neville Longbottom would some day be teaching the very class he loathed while in attendance. He was a very good actor though and that helped with frightening the students and spying. I know the real Neville however, and if he knew that his words that made this tiny girl, his daughter, cry he would gladly take any punishment he saw fit.

"Very well, Miss Potter. Come into my office, I have tea." I said. Ronald had escaped from Azkaban recently and I knew the girl was on edge about the thought of her parents 'betrayer' on the loose. If only she knew the truth. Perhaps it was time to tell her, wether or not McGonagall thought so. Giving another sigh I look at the girl one more time. "I have a very interesting story you might want to hear. About a group of friends I once knew."

It seemed fate was sealed in stone, or at least the curse that was placed upon us is. To repeat the past in till we fix the mistakes of it. Snape truly was a bastard but with his dying breath he had given us both a gift and a curse. It's a shame I hadn't found out about it sooner, I could have saved so many lives. Including my own. I stared at the pictures on my walls, those of Luna and I holding little Freya, and myself and Draco curled up together on the couch in our muggle flat. So many lives have been destroyed by one man, a man no one has stopped yet, and they would continue to do so. With any hope I can condition Lilly to finally be the one to stop the madness, if not her fate has already been decided.

"Professor Granger?" her soft voice called out from the door way. Glancing at her quickly I turned towards my desk.

"Right then, the story." I said as I waved her to set down. Taking a sip of tea I relaxed. It was never easy to talk about the past, but some times it is exactly what is needed.

fins.

AN: So what do you think? It's supposed to be strange, and weird. I wrote it on a whim so... Anyway please RR thanks!!