A Place Where You Belong
By:
no tears left to cry
Lyrics belong to Bullet for My Valentine
Song title:
A Place Where You Belong
Your body's cold, hope is lost I can't let go
Can I die with you so we can never grow old
Cut the ties with this note you left behind
As I read the words I hear you telling me why
I can't breath. It can't be true. My hand reaches out. Your face is ice cold where your tears rolled down your face in the final moments. I can't let it go. Only a few hours to late to save you. My hope, my dreams have all been lost. You took them all away with that one last final breath.
My hands run through my hair and I stare down at you. Your soft lips, once red with life are now a dull pink. Your heart stopped long ago. I imagined on the nights that I was gone, that we would get married, have children, and watch them grow up and have children of their own. I thought we would grow old together on the back pourch as our grandchildren played in the backyard.
A note lays on the floor. A few small splatters of blood have soaked through the crisp white paper and stained it with what used to run wild through your veins. I don't want to read it. I'm afraid at what it will say. Why you cut your ties to this world forever. I don't want to open the small paper, now stained with your blood, I don't want to see why you had to leave me.
Slowly, my hands unfold the paper. I have to force my eyes to read the cursive handwriting that was so neatly penned on the page. I remembered back when we were students at the acadmy and I would watch you you while you did your work. I loved the way that your hands would write the words so neat and percise on the page.
"I don't know really what to say to you guys. I don't want you to be sad. I hate the fact that no matter what words I leave to you all, there will still be tears shed. Explaining why you killed yourself to your friends... it difficult. It took me hours to decide on this final note. Short and sweet is what I decided on.
Life is well... not worth it to me anymore. I don't mean you guys, but just life. You guys found ways to be happy with who your with. But who do I have? Even Sai, the emotionly retarded king got a girlfriend... while I stand off to the side all alone. And I was tierd of it.
Everyone, even Naruto told me to give up on Sasuke ever coming back. You all told me to find someone here in Konoha or Suna, someone who's safe and love them. But I never could. My heart only held love for the last Uchiha.... and it always will..
I guess this is the part where I say good-bye, because I don't know what else to say.
Love you all,
Haruno, Sakura"
I read the note over and over, and as I read it more and more, I can here your voice. It always reminded me of a spring day when the first of the flowers would bloom. So bright, happy, and alive. I'll never hear it again,l because you will never speak again. No words will ever rush past your lips. You'll remain silent for the rest of time.
Too late too late-- I never said good-bye
Too late too late-- Can't even ask you why
And now, I'm wasting away in my own misery
I hope you've finally gone to a plave where you belong
Why couldn't I have come sooner? I ask myself over and over again. Why wouldn't I have ran a little faster and reached you before you took that knife in your hand and let it end it all? Why couldn't I have gotten here, even when it was too late, and tell you good-bye and hold you in my arms as your bright jade eyes glossed over with death. As your chest stopped rising and falling as breaths were drawn in from your delicate pink lips.
Its too late for all the questions that I want to ask you. Its too late for it all now.
Its been five days, 12 hours, and 25 minutes since they found us in your apartment. You were craddling in my arms as my tears ran from my eyes and dripped onto your face. Its beem fuve days, 12 hours, and 25 minutes since they found us together, you dead, and me finally back in Konoha, proving them all wrong. Its been five days, 12 hours, and 25 minutes since they had to watch a friend, a comrade, a sister, a daughter be carried out of her home by an enemy of the village.
I don't know what to do with myself. I've spent these last five days thinking about the "what ifs". All I've done is sit and think. I don't want to talk about it when someone ask me. I think that the people who ask if I'm okay, should be killed. I just want Sakura back. I want to be able to hold her in my arms, alive and well. I want to be able to talk to her about anything and everything. I just want her.
My sadness shows, as your name is carved in stone
Can't erase the words so the reality grows
I wish I'd died on that night by your side
So just kill me now and let the good times roll
It feels like an eternity since I found you. An eternity filled with such searing pain, that I often wake at night from a dream in a cold sweat and screaming. And today is the day when they place the perment marker on her grave. It will say:
"Haruno Sakura
Beloved Cherry Blossom of Konoha.
May she fly with the angels
As she rest in eternal peace."
Just seeing the words etched on the stone that will outlast all of us, makes things even worse. It makes me realize this is not some fucked up dream that I will awaken from. This is my life now. I have to live with the fact that what you did was my fault. I should have come back sooner. I should not have left you alone on the bench so many years ago when we were still young and naive. I made so many mistakes that I can never take back now. You'll never be alive again.
I wish, so hard, that I could have laid by your side that night and take you hand and drift off with you into the beyond. Into forever. But it will never happen. I will never get to lay beside you and kiss your lips like I wanted too.
They don't like me here. I can tell. All the glares at I have been given by people that cared about her. They want blood to be spilled because I was the reason their friend was taken from the world by her very own hand. I can't say that I blame them. At night I look at myself in the mirror and wonder why I am to big a coward to give them what they want... and what I want. Why don't I give in to the wants and needs and let them have a good time dancing on my grave?
Will you wait for me
Will I see you on the other side
You won't have to wait too long
Will you come to me
Will you take me to the other side
'Cause here I don't belong
I can't wait any longer. I can not live like this. I ask you, will you wait for me? Can you wait for me? I know I do not deserve to see you in the afterlife, but I want too. I want to say how sorry I am. I want to be able to hold you in my arms onces again. Will they let us be together in death?
Blood seeps down to the floor, pooling around my feet. My hands are dyed red with the crimson liquid that drains from my veins. You won't have to wait long now Sakura. I'll be with you soon enough.
I never really belonged in this place. I belong even less after you left us all. Can I find this place that you have gone to? Will I be able to walk next to you for the rest of time?
We'll find out soon enough. And I collapse on the floor. Blood mats in my hair and the iron tasting substance fills my mouth.
We wait no longer.
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. And as I metioned before, I do not own the rights to the lyrics of "A Place Where You Belong". They belong to the band Bullet for My Valetine. The song is from their new album "Fever".
And it seems that the spell check still does not want to work for me. Please forgive all mistakes!
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Later!