The Chocobo War

Summary: Genesis and Sephiroth start a little friendly competition: Who will get Cloud into bed first? Some have money on Sephiroth, some on Genesis, and Cloud has no idea what is going on…. But not for long. Shinra better buckle up, because Cloud Strife is not amused. Pick your side. The Chocobo War begins.

Cloud Strife was not having a good day.

No.

This was definitely not a good day.

Commanding Officer Mayako, correctly nicknamed Sergeant Monster, laid into him again for what had to have been the twentieth time that week. It wasn't like Cloud wasn't trying his best-he was, he really was. But it was hard. It really was hard...

Especially considering the recent events involving two First Class SOLDIERs.

Cloud looked up from where he was sitting in the locker room. The door to his locker was nudged open, and he could see some of his civvies clothes crumpled on the bottom. There was a little bit of old gum stuck to the side-no scrubbing he could do would be able to get rid of it-and Cloud found himself reaching out to pick at it with his nail.

Even touching someone else's discarded gum was better than thinking about the bullshit going on with Genesis Rhapsodos.

Cloud let his nail did into the hard rubbery substance as he allowed his mind to wander.

It had started as a really nice day, if Cloud were honest with himself. He woke to the sound of Zack snoring in the other room. Wednesday nights were game night and by the time Cloud eviscerated Zack into a mushy pile of whining fail on the PlayBox4's newest game "Stargaze EX" it was way too late to leave without getting into trouble if he were caught. Plus, Zack's couch folded out into a really nice bed, and it was way more comfortable than his metal cot in the barracks.

He woke to bacon sizzling. He could smell it like a dog after blood, or a SOLDIER after a monster. It was amazing that Zack could cook; Cloud only knew a couple of recipes from home, mostly things that were very cheap and easy to make. Stews and soups were always good, since usually they simmered long enough for the hard meat to become edible.

They ate a full breakfast of bacon, eggs, and pancakes and then Zack ruffled his hair, threw him one of his own old grunt uniforms, and ushered him out of the room.

"Oh, hey Sephiroth," Zack said when he locked the door, and Cloud felt his stomach fall down to his feet. "I wanna introduce you to my friend."

Sephiroth was intimidating. That was the only word Cloud could think of when he first saw the man. It didn't matter that he was wearing a casual pair of black slacks and a light grey button-up shirt, his hair tied up in a low ponytail at the base of his neck. One hand held a traveling coffee mug with a moogle on it (it looked a lot like the one Zack had in his kitchen, actually) and the other held a set of keys. He only looked up to Zack for a moment, a smile flitting across Sephiroth's face when he met Zack's eyes, and then he looked down to Cloud.

Cloud gulped and scratched against the bubblegum stuck on the metal. It was stubborn. So damn stubborn.

The way Sephiroth looked at him made Cloud feel like he was about to be swallowed whole in those eyes. It was something that Cloud had never really experienced before, and he wasn't sure he liked it.

And then someone opened up Sephiroth's door from the other side.

Cloud's eyes were drawn immediately from Sephiroth to another slightly familiar and only a little less terrifying face. Genesis Rhapsodos.

Cloud was pretty sure that, if SOLDIER didn't work out for Genesis, he probably would do just fine as a model or actor or singer, something creative. He had that flare to him that made every eye draw towards him, making him always the center of attention...

Yet it wasn't. Cloud only remembered later, but Zack, Sephiroth, and Genesis had been staring only at him.

Awkward.

But no, if it ended there, Cloud wouldn't have had such a shitty day. No, no. It was what Genesis did after that made Cloud's day so... off.

Shit.

Genesis had a flare for the dramatic, yes, so when he pushed himself past Sephiroth and his moogle cup (why was Genesis in Sephiroth's apartment, Cloud wasn't sure, and why did Sephiroth have that cup? Really...) Cloud should not have been surprised.

He was surprised when the auburn-haired man saddled up to him and pushed him against Zack, who then hit the wall behind him. The auburn-haired man leaned forward and Cloud could see the flecks of green in his blue eyes and smell mint on his breath.

"Well, hello there," Genesis said with a smirk. Cloud could feel Zack tense behind him. "What're you doing sneaking out of Zack's room?"

"Sir, I wasn't sneaking, sir." Cloud could feel the perspiration beginning to build on his forehead. He could smell the man's perfume, deep and woody with a spicy hint of apple. "I... I..."

Genesis leaned even closer, and Cloud leaned further back into Zack. "Oh, Puppy. Naughty, naughty. Sneaking in little chocobos into your room... Maybe we should tell Angeal. Let him take care of this with a little bit of newspaper..."

"Gen, you're scaring him," Sephiroth responded demurely, "just leave them alone."

"It's not like that," Zack squawked, more like a chocobo than Cloud could pull off. "He just couldn't get home on time last night, that's all. He slept on the couch."

But Genesis leaned even closer now and Cloud could even smell a hint of something like cinnamon on Genesis's breath, under the mint. Was he-

Genesis's mouth was descending down and Cloud did the only thing he could think of-

Crack.

It was instinct. After having gotten into so many fights with other kids when he was younger, Cloud's body reacted without thought. It was either that or get the crap beat out of him on a regular basis. Really, if Genesis had looked at his file, like Cloud was sure the man was doing right now as he waited for his nose to heal, then he would have known. Cloud sucked at a lot of thinks, but thinking on his feel (or reacting without thinking, he thought sourly) was definitely not an issue.

So, Cloud headbutted him.

Hard.

The General made a pained grunt and reeled back, away from Cloud, and Cloud could only yell out a "Sorry sir, so sorry!" before Zack grabbed him by the back of his neck and yanked him down the hall at a break-neck speed.

"Zack! Stop!" Cloud yelled after they ran down at least three floors and there was no hint that the SOLDIER was running after them.

Zack slowed his run to a jog and then, finally, stopped. Cloud could feel a stitch in his side, and he grabbed at it with one hand, the other hand fumbling out to the wall. He could barely keep himself up.

"Oh, man, I can't believe you did that, Cloud. Genesis loves his nose." Zack was smiling though, only a little out of breath. "He can be a bit nasty in the morning. Best we run and handle it later. And you don't want to be late, right Cloud?"

Cloud felt his knees buckle and if not for Zack catching him, he would have eaten the ground.

Maybe that would have been better.

Cloud sighed and looked at his finger, digging into the gum. They were gunna kick him out of the program, weren't they? He flicked the gum off and kicked the locker closed.

This day couldn't possibly get any worse.

"Stop moving, you'll only make it worse," Sephiroth deadpanned as he pushed a bag of frozen green peas against Genesis's face, enjoying the sound Genesis made more than he would admit to the other man. However, he was sure that the smirk was evidence enough of his feelings. "He definitely managed to give you a good whack."

"Yush," Genesis said. "Is it bwoken?"

Sephiroth lifted up the bag and looked at his lover's bruised face. His nose seemed to be straight, and he gently ran his finger over the bridge. "I think you just managed to bruise it up. You shouldn't try to make moves on Zack's friend without expecting to get a little banged up."

"Skittish wike a chocobo, twoo," Genesis mumbled and pulled the bag of peas away from Sephiroth. He put them over his nose, partially for the coldness and also to hide his frown.

"Zack said he was skittish. Just because kissing cadets is something that worked with Zack-"

"Zwack didn't hib me," he grumbled, but Sephiroth tapped one finger against the bag, enough to make Genesis howl.

"Angeal didn't let him, remember?" Sephiroth grabbed his moogle coffee mug, the one Zack got for all of them, and took a sip as he folded his other hand in the crease of his elbow. "And I remember you didn't try to kiss him until the second meeting."

Genesis could be such a child, sometimes, Sephiroth thought as he swirled the coffee around his cup. This entire thing was absolutely insane. It was childish. It was ludicrous. It was the exact kind of hare-brained scheme Genesis and Zack would come up with.

"So, instead of introducing yourself like a normal human being, you decided that attempted sexual assault was a good idea?"

"No," Genesis pulled down the bag and scowled. "Wasn't gunna do awybing."

Sephiroth couldn't help but roll his eyes and put the moogle mug down on the table.

"Like you didn't do anything to me?"

It had been Genesis, first. Sephiroth knew that Genesis and Angeal were more than friends since they first introduced themselves. Genesis had been far too attached to Angeal, way too jealous of the silent albeit strong relationship Sephiroth and Angeal began. At first, Sephiroth thought that Genesis hated him; after all, he would start fights and purposely goad the silver-haired man at every turn. It took some time and some long conversations to realize that no, this was Genesis's way of staking claim on Angeal.

It happened one day in the training room. It was all three of them fighting, and mid-parry Genesis grabbed Sephiroth's hair and kissed him, hard, with tongue and blood.

Sephiroth hadn't known what to do, and dropped his sword straight down on Genesis's foot. Thankfully, the metal guard was good enough to keep all of Genesis's toes attached to his foot.

Angeal had just looked at the two of them and said, "So this means no more ranting about one another to me?" before laughing and holstering his sword.

Zack came later. It was a surprise to Sephiroth when Angeal brought the teenager home with him. He had been only sixteen, but was strong and independent and so very intuitive. In fact, Sephiroth would put money on it that Zack assumed he would be part of the group even before Sephiroth and Genesis met him. That was why, when Genesis kissed him on their second meeting, Zack took it all in stride.

Things were... complicated after that. Sephiroth couldn't lie; the addition of Zack made things a little difficult at first. It was an adjustment. In the beginning, Angeal and Zack were lovers almost exclusively. Sephiroth didn't fault Zack; it was his first love, his first experience with another person. He need the time that Angeal had given to Genesis and Sephiroth when it began. And then, Angeal had worked himself in with strong arms and Sephiroth knew that it worked.

With Zack, Genesis had been jealous. Oh, so jealous. The Puppy was just a plaything for Angeal, Genesis had ranted and raved until Sephiroth had to physically restrain the other man from running into Angeal's apartment to tear his lover's arms off Zack. They both knew better; Zack was no more of a plaything than Sephiroth was.

And they had talked through it, in the end. And, after a round of fucking that left both sore for days, they pulled Angeal to the side. Of course, Zack needed time... but if Angeal wanted to leave...

But he hadn't, and it only took a few months for Zack to warm up to the idea after admitting to Sephiroth drunkenly that yes, Zack joined the army partially because he wanted to see Sephiroth naked.

To be fair...

Most people did.

But now, Zack had Cloud... and Cloud was someone that Sephiroth found absolutely fascinating.

Of course, he read the file. He read the file the first time Zack mentioned off-handedly that he was going to have lunch with a new cadet who he thought showed a lot of promise. Sephiroth didn't understand at first; the records showed a mediocre performance and-dare he say it- subpar mental health records.

But then he saw Cloud and understood what Zack meant when he said there was something... there was just something about him.

Sephiroth wanted to call it dumb luck, but after watching the blond throw an opponent across the training room after the other boy tried to grab him by the hair at the back of his neck, he knew it was more.

Cloud Strife fought like a rabid dog, or, if the simulations in the VR room were correct, like a rabid Nibel Wolf. They were very beautiful creatures, but oftentimes their young would be sickly until the mako built up in their systems. This didn't mean they were weak pups; no, on the contrary. A Nibel Wolf was most dangerous when it was vulnerable, when it was scared and afraid.

Genesis was luck Cloud Strife didn't rip out his throat the way a true Nibel Wolf would have.

Genesis balefully glanced at Sephiroth once more before the SOLDIER walked around the island kitchen counter Genesis had sat down on and into his bedroom, flicking on the light. His room was big enough for an orgy-kind of the point, Sephiroth thought as he looked over the wide expanse of bed. He had upgraded right after Zack joined their group; he was tired of getting kicked halfway off the bed every night.

Sephiroth padded across the floor and grabbed hold of the little box on his desk, bringing it with him as he left the room switching off the light on his way out.

Genesis was still in the same position he had been left in, and for that Sephiroth was lucky. The last thing he wanted was Genesis leaving the apartment with the bruises forming on his nose. Really, there were enough rumors around the office about their proclivities since no one knew of any of their ex-girlfriends or lovers. This led to rampant assumptions, and with that... really, having a busted nose would be no good.

Sephiroth put the box on the table and lifted the top, the materia glowing and lighting up the entire kitchen.

"You don't need a FullCure, do you?" Sephiroth asked as he fingered through the materia, waiting until his fingers came to a dark green orb that felt like a warm spring day.

"No."

"Then hold still."

Genesis did not move as Sephiroth slowly grew out the magic, allowing the soft green tendrils to reach out and lick Genesis's face. The beginnings of the bruising disappeared with Genesis only sighing in response.

"Well, the good news is that you will survive." Sephiroth smiled.

"However, my dignity is shattered." Genesis reached up to touch his nose, and Sephiroth knew from the way that Genesis made no insult or further comment that it was good enough. "But now the little Chocobo will no doubt be even more skittish."

"Then you shouldn't have tried to kiss him."

"Yes, well... maybe not my most suave moment," Genesis agreed, "but you can't deny that seeing him coming out of Zack's room made you a little..."

"Jealous? No, Genesis. That is your forte, not mine." Sephiroth knew that Genesis was prone to reacting without thinking things through, but really...

"Either or, I will have to fix this..."

Sephiroth hummed in agreement and reached for his coffee cup, sighing when he looked down into the emptiness. More coffee. He really, really needed more coffee.

Genesis looked to him, And Sephiroth could see that there was something on his mind, even before he managed to say anything. "Genesis, whatever you are thinking about, no."

"You haven't even heard my plan."

"It is a no."

"But you haven't listened to anything yet. Just- let's say that perhaps the Puppy hasn't explained things to Cloud yet. Let us say that instead, we pursue him-"

"This really doesn't sound like a good idea." Sephiroth turned and placed his coffee cup down on the table, pocketing his materia with the other hand. He reached for the pot and poured more coffee into the cup, the steam wafting up in slow circles. Quickly he mixed in a fair splash of cream and two heaping spoonfuls of sugar.

"Nonsense," Genesis said as he jumped up from his seat on the counter and threw the bag of peas into the sink just a little too hard, enough to make the bag explode. "Never much liked peas anyway," Genesis muttered as Sephiroth stared down into his new cup of coffee, watching the peas bobbing in the milky liquid.

Sephiroth sighed and reached into the hot liquid, grabbing a pea between his fingers. He flicked it into the sink. "I am aware."

"So, we pursue the Chocobo, but I wonder... how would be bring him into the fold? Especially if Zack hasn't introduced the idea to him... Perhaps we should..." Genesis tapped one finger against his lips, a devious smile spreading from one corner of his mouth to the other. "Oh, yes. Call Angeal. I have an idea."

"Absolutely not."

Genesis was not impressed by the others. Couldn't they see how simple the plan would be? The blond was mesmerizing, and really, he would fit in perfectly with the quartet. A quintet... it would be sublime. And yet, from the frown on Angeal's face, he could see that the idea was going to be a little more difficult to get through than any of the other ideas he had come up with in the past.

"I am doing it whether you let me or not."

"Then I will tie you up and send you off to Junon."

"Oh, don't even joke. You know you would never send me away."

"Don't tempt me."

"Oh, posh," Genesis laughed. "But truly, let's consider it a bet-I will make Cloud Strife fall in love with me first. I will get him to join our group."

"The only thing you will get is another busted nose," Sephiroth remarked and then looked at Angeal, who stood in the corner of the room with his arms crossed.

Genesis tsked and looked between Angeal and Sephiroth for a moment before throwing his hands up in frustration. There was only one thing that Genesis could do... offer something that "Let me enjoy this. Sephiroth, I bet you an entire year worth of that expensive Wutaian coffee you love so much-"

"But I can just buy that for myself-"

The auburn-haired man held up his hand to stop Sephiroth from continuing, "And I promise to allow you to do whatever you want, for a week."

Sephiroth leaned in closer, just a little. "A year. And it even means that you won't be allowed to think up any more crazy ideas like this."

"A month. And if you lose, you have to let me top."

Genesis watched Sephiroth's eyes widen fractionally before turning to slits. Oh, yes... Sephiroth on his back. It had only happened once, and Genesis had been so drunk he could barely remember it.

"Once."

Oh, definitely not acceptable. Genesis looked over to Angeal who was all but ready to start smacking his head into the table. "As many times as I want. For a month."

Sephiroth always preferred topping. It was something in his character, Genesis s guessed. He didn't understand why; Genesis loved both the top and the bottom. But, this was something that bothered him for a long time and he really, really wanted it.

Plus, it meant that they would be adding the little Chocobo into the collection.

"A week."

Genesis sighed. "Two weeks. And a month if I can get him into my bed in a week."

At this, Sephiroth barked out a laugh. "Oh, that will never happen, Genesis. You're good, but you aren't that good."

"That's not what you said last night," Genesis purred and pushed Sephiroth against the island countertop, putting his thumbs through the other man's belt buckles. The black pressed pants rubbed deliciously against Genesis's fingers. He leaned forward and rested his nose on Sephiroth's throat, nipping at the skin he could see.

"Deal."

Genesis looked up into Sephiroth's eyes. The General was looking down at him with a small smile, which was when Angeal finally cut in.

"There is a little problem with your little bet."

Genesis and Sephiroth swiveled their heads to Angeal, who was still frowning.

"Did none of you think that Zack and I talked about this?"

"What's the problem?"

Angeal looked from Genesis to Sephiroth and then back to Genesis. "Zack says Cloud is straight."

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