Todundverklarun had this really amusing headcanon idea, and I desperately wanted to write it. Then I started to do so (a bit off track at first, sorry!) but I got a terrible case of writer's block, and things have been slow. Hopefully I'm getting over it, because I really want to do a bunch of silly romance drabbles for February.

Anyway, slight blood warning, and lots of idiots warning. Sorry for any mistakes. Hope you like it!

It was a given that any time Harlock and Zero met up, two things would happen. They would argue, and they would get drunk, occasionally at the same time. Fistfights weren't entirely uncommon either, but other than their usual drunken banter, they'd mostly behaved themselves this round.

Zero lazily tossed another dart, smacking the green ring just around the bull's eye. He muttered a curse as Harlock took his turn, only to knock Zero's dart off with his own. "How did you even manage that?" the Independent slurred, not completely drunk yet but certainly getting there.

"I'm talented," the pirate snorted, his chin in his palm as he sat slumped over the table. The bartender had grown accustomed to their lazy antics and hadn't felt the need to kick them out. They were pretty well-behaved drunks, the last two conscious ones still hanging around. While he worked on cleaning the glasses, they just talked and played darts.

They'd started out much rowdier. In fact, he'd assumed they were going to go to blows. The only thing that seemed to stop them was the short man now asleep against the table who had grinned and laughed away all their arguments. Since the two men had started playing darts, they'd calmed down considerably.

"Could we have another round?" Zero asked, holding up an empty wine bottle. He wasn't as fond of wine as Harlock, but at this point he was less interested in taste. It was just important that he continue drinking.

Harlock held up a hand to catch the new bottle that was tossed to him, offering a lazy salute in thanks. The wine on this planet was actually good, and he'd begun to see the world with a rose tint. Everything was nice and comfortable, though Zero was still a bit grumpy. That was to be expected really. Until Zero was properly plastered, he was nearly impossible to please.

The older captain got up to gather the darts while Harlock screwed out the cork of the new bottle. "Okay," the pirate decided. "Let's play a game."

The Independent glanced at the dartboard. "Aren't we already?"

"I don't know. I wasn't really keeping score. Let's play something fun." He thought for only a brief moment. "Truth or dare?"

Though the elder male found the idea of the game exceptionally childish, he gave a small sigh as he plopped back down in his chair. "Truth." He'd always picked truth over dare, and even with the chance of horribly invasive questions that Harlock could ask, it still seemed a safer bet than a dare.

The pirate pointed to the light pink scar across Zero's forearm, visible since he'd removed his jacket and draped it over the back of his chair. "Tell me about that."

Zero had to look at his arm to even see what Harlock was talking about. "This isn't a game," he grumbled. "That's just you being nosy."

The younger grinned as he poured them each another full glass. "Well of course it is. That's the point. But see, if you refuse to say, then you have to drink a full glass. I just thought I'd start out easy on you."

Zero wasn't entirely sure how drinking was supposed to be a punishment. Kicking his feet up onto the table, he tried to recall that scar in particular. "I think I fell back on some broken glass during a mission after a window was blown out. Then again, that could be the one on my left arm…" He had too many scars to try keeping track of them all.

Harlock had already lost interest in Zero's turn. "Alright, give me a dare."

Of course, the Independent had been hoping for a truth so he could ask about the pirate's familial scar. He also wasn't very good at coming up with dares. "I don't know. Um, do a handstand." Harlock's short laugh encouraged him to be more creative. "And hold it until your next turn," he grumbled.

The brunet shrugged, standing to go to the wall with the dartboard. He threw the weight of his back against it, kicking his feet up and quickly finding balance on his hands. Despite the alcohol, he only wobbled for a moment before grinning at the other captain.

"Truth," Zero smiled. Harlock's hair was so long that it nearly brushed the ground, and it was simply entertaining to see the pirate upside-down.

"What's a sex kink no one knows you have?"

The bartender glanced up curiously, only to find the flipped pirate laughing and the government man downing a glass of wine.

"Oh, come on," Harlock snickered.

"There is no reason you would need to know that," Zero growled as he slammed his wine glass down.

"I told you, the point of the game is to be intrusive, and it's so easy to rile you up." He lowered himself from his handstand, momentarily dizzy as his blood returned to its normal position. "Dare."

"I dare you to not be such an asshole."

"Be realistic, Zero," Harlock grinned.

Zero sighed. "Fine. I dare you to drink three beers." It was basically the same as having the wine after refusing a challenge, but Zero knew Harlock wasn't one to back down. He relished in the disgust on the pirate's face. Neither of them was particularly fond of beer.

As the bartender wondered how the two were going to pay their ever-growing tab, he tossed over the beers, one at a time. He was still amazed that they were even able to catch them with how drunk they were getting.

Harlock cracked one open and downed it, hoping to drink it fast enough to keep the taste from lingering, but it still stuck on his tongue. He had to cover up a burp as he placed the empty bottle down to the table. "That is foul," he muttered. "You doing truth again?" He snapped off the cap of the second drink.

"Depends, what's my question?"

Choosing to sip the second drink, Harlock thought it over for a minute. "What can you tell me about that new weapon project the government's working on?"

Zero cocked a brow, frowning. He wondered if this was really the reason they'd started playing this game in the first place. Harlock certainly had a way of finding out about things he didn't need to. "Nothing," the government's dog answered.

Harlock quickly realized he'd worded his question wrong. "Oh come on," he grumbled. "Give me some sort of answer."

"Can't tell you anything, because I don't know anything," Zero shrugged. Without needing to, he drank another glass of wine. At this point, he probably would have told Harlock something if he'd known anything. His employers had been very hush-hush about so much recently. It was getting on his nerves.

As Harlock picked up the third beer, Zero finished off the wine. "Another," he called, lazily waving his hand.

"Can you still catch?" the bartender called skeptically. They were both starting to look and sound like proper drunks now. The pirate leaned heavily against a chair, and the other was sliding down in his.

Realizing he probably couldn't, Zero staggered to his feet and made his way to the bottle. "Dare!" Harlock yelled, slamming down his final empty glass. It shattered under the force of his hand, and he stared at the broken pieces in confusion.

Zero gave a slight laugh. "Okay," he decided, holding up his newly-retrieved bottle. His words slurred together in a mess as he smiled. "Shoot this cork out for me."

"I don't think that's-" the bartender began, though he wasn't allowed to finish.

"No problem," Harlock assured them, drawing his gun. "Bet you I can do it in one shot."

"Bet you 20, you can't," Zero snorted.

The two were only a few meters apart, and Zero's unsteady hand held the bottle out at an angle, the cork pointed slightly away from the pirate as though to give him a disadvantage. Harlock was still certain he could hit it. He took barely a moment's aim before firing, and the bartender ducked for safety.

A few of the unconscious men stirred lightly at the sound of one blast, followed by a curse from the captain and another quick shot. The subsequent crack of it against the bottle followed. In Zero's eyes, the cork had simply vanished, though he'd been watching it the whole time. He reached up to scratch at a sudden itch in his cheek. His hand pulled away with a smear of blood across it. Well that was odd.

Meanwhile, Harlock was laughing. "Damn, I almost had it that first time."

"I think you were aiming at me the first- Shit, what happened to your eye!?" Zero stared in horror at the blood pooling from it, quickly soaking the pirate's hair. The brunet bangs were painted a darker shade and clung to his cheek. He took little notice.

"I think the first shot ricocheted," he shrugged. "Now pour the wine, so I can get this damn beer taste out of my mouth." He pulled out his chair and quickly returned to it, while Zero began fretting over his injury. He finally managed to get the bottle and pour himself a drink when Zero set to work tying strips of his cravat around his face to slow the bleeding.

"Doesn't it hurt?" Zero muttered.

"Yeah, but the more I drink, the less it does," Harlock smiled, raising a toast to himself.

"I don't think you're going to be able to fix it."

"Yeah, that's cool. My dad had an eye patch too."

Zero's drunken mind was torn between the ideas that eye patches were in-fact cool, and that Harlock was a complete idiot that would now lack depth perception. "We should probably get you to a doctor though."

Harlock shrugged. "Maybe later. You should drink some more. It's good for you."

Zero eventually had to agree with the stubborn pirate, and later turned into the next morning. All the men of the Deathshadow eased from their hangovers to find their captain minus an eye.

"So you see, there were these muggers," a more sober Harlock explained.

Zero, with a large bandage slapped across his cheek, nodded in agreement. "They jumped us."

"I'd barely turned around when they started shooting."

"Such cowards," Zero affirmed.

"You should have seen the way we fought them off," Harlock smirked proudly. "That's what they get for taking my eye."

It had taken them hours of putting their drunk heads together to come up with the story, and the men applauded their bravery. The doctor rolled his eyes and told them to quit drinking so much.

"I still can't believe you shot your eye out," Zero muttered once the men had left.

"It's your fault," Harlock reminded him.

It wasn't…completely, the Independent decided. He was certain the pirate would continue holding it over his head anyway.

"Do I look alright with this patch?" Harlock questioned as he brushed his thumb over it. "What do you think?"

Zero couldn't really say one way or the other. Harlock did look identical to his father now. "I think it looks a hell of a lot better than what's under it," he said.

They both came to an agreement on that idea before making a silent pact. No one would know what actually happened except the two of them and a bartender, who was still working on cleaning up the mess.

This is my permanent headcanon for the CWZ universe, because I like to imagine that Harlock loses his eyeball in different, fancy ways in every one of them.