Title: I Can't Stop This Feeling I've Got.
Summary: All of Craig's concentration seems to be directed at a fair-haired, blue-eyed boy he knows all too well.
Author's Note: Takes place during the episode aired on 16/05/07, and then takes a different route. Thanks to Nikita for the beta.
Word Count: 1,425
Disclaimer: Neither John Paul McQueen nor Craig Dean belong to me, I'm just playing.

Craig's tears ran freely down his cheeks as he reached out to John Paul's T-shirt. Slowly, gently, he stroked his best friend's chest, watching his hands move up and down as if he were in some sort of trance.

John Paul's words were barely above a whisper, "Craig…Craig, don't."

Craig's hands had risen to John Paul's shoulders, and again he was stroking his best friend, "I – I…I can't stop thinking about you," he said, his voice full of emotion. His hands rose higher to John Paul's neck, cupping his best friend's head firmly, Craig brought himself within J.P.'s personal space.

"Craig, Craig…," John Paul murmured, his eyes wide.

Breathing each other's air, Craig held on for dear life, "…I want you," he whispered and, with all of his strength, he crashed his mouth against John Paul's.

He remembered the kiss they had shared a couple of months ago…their first kiss. Even though he was acting like a drunken fool, he knew what he'd done. He, Craig Dean, kissed his best friend. As fast as it had happened, it was over.

Hannah overheard him telling J.P. that he loved him, then saw him kissing him. Her heart broken, she ran off to tell Sarah and Nancy. Suddenly, Craig was as sober as a judge.

Over the past few days and weeks, knowing that his best friend was truly gay, even having a boyfriend, Craig's feelings had been torn apart, stripped of what he knew and sewn back together out of sequence.

He saw his girlfriend as vain and obnoxious and his best friend as something more, something amazing, and something he needed to follow up on. And this kiss told him his feelings had been right.

John Paul's arms suddenly reached up to Craig's chest. For a few seconds, John Paul caressed Craig's chest with the love he felt for him before pushing Craig off him, hearing a whimper escape his best friend's lips.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" John Paul gasped, drawing much-needed air into his lungs.

Craig just ran his hands through his hair and sobbed. He turned from J.P., facing the living room. Knowing that, once again, he'd screwed up; Craig wished that hell would open up and swallow him.

"Craig, talk to me! What's going on with you?" John Paul reached for his friend, when a spark ran through him. Craig felt it too, for he spun on the spot. Trapped in each others space again, Craig's eyes fell to John Paul's lips. He remembered their taste, or maybe that was just a combination of his fear and the sherry. In that instance, he knew what he needed to do.

Reaching out for John Paul, he took one of his hands and laced it with his own. Stumbling through the McQueen home, he led J.P. to the stairs. Before he took one step upwards to his best mate's room, John Paul came to his senses and dropped his hand from Craig's.

"Where…what do you think you're doing, Craig?" John Paul asked, his blue eyes waking from their dazed look.

Again, a sob passed from his lips. Fresh, salty tears beckoning to escape from him, he swallowed hard, dabbed at his tears and looked up at his best friend.

"Craig, please…what's this all about? Talk to me," J.P. said, placing his hands on Craig's shoulders reassuringly.

"I…I…" Craig started. He cleared his throat a number of times, looking anywhere but John Paul's face. "For the past few days, I've been…yeah, I've been off with your boyfriend because my tastes are different," he said, walking closer into John Paul's arms.

"My mind's been all over the place! I…I just walked out of an exam because my mind's in bits!" Craig said loudly, cupping one of John Paul's cheeks in his hand. He stroked his thumb across the soft skin of J.P.'s lips.

"I keep remembering that kiss… I imagine you and Spike together, and I feel sick! I can't touch Sarah without feeling dirty, and I want you so bad it hurts," Craig said, his voice cracking.

"John Paul, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you for weeks! And, yeah, I've been jealous of Spike, because I…I – I want you so badly, I want to be the one that you kiss," Craig said, letting out a breath he didn't even know he was holding.

Craig had just laid out all his thoughts and feelings on a platter for John Paul to sort through and, by the look on his best mate's face, it was something he'd completely unexpected to hear spilling from his first love's lips.

"Craig…," John Paul started, before Craig smashed his lips to J.P.'s own. Again, he started to lead the one of his thoughts up the stairs. They stumbled and nearly fell over a few times before crashing into John Paul's room.

John Paul broke the kiss for what must've been the third time by now, "You sure?" he asked, hoping that yes would still be the answer. He watched as tears spilled from Craig's eyes again, slower this time. He watched as Craig surveyed the room, for some unknown reason. He watched as Craig nodded his answer and again pushed his mouth to J.P.'s.

His hands fell from his best mates' neck to his top. Without breaking the kiss, he slid the hoodie from John Paul's chest and slid his hands beneath John Paul's T-shirt. He felt the toned abs and muscles there and sighed contentedly into his lover's mouth.

John Paul's hands snaked to the base of Craig's top, which he swiftly pulled over his head, followed by the tank top underneath. Now bare-chested, John Paul had to break the kiss. If this was going to happen, something he'd been dreaming of for months now, then he was going to remember every last, minute detail.

The bronzed chest heaved as Craig felt John Paul's gaze take everything in. His breathing deepened further and he once again sought out John Paul's mouth.

John Paul met Craig's tongue with as much vigour as he had given in their previous kisses. As J.P. massaged his tongue, Craig backed them both up against the bed. As the back of his knees hit it, he fell backwards onto his bed.

Smiling, Craig placed a leg on either side of John Paul's own before gently sitting down on his lap.

John Paul could not believe what his eyes were showing him. The guy of his dreams, the love of his life, was in his arms, kissing him with as much passion as he could feel for anyone. And Craig was the one who initiated everything - no coercion from John Paul required!

What was it Craig had said earlier on? I want you. I guess he actually does loves me, John Paul thought contentedly.

Craig's movement stopped suddenly, his arms draped over John Paul's shoulders. Reaching out to wipe away the damp tears, John Paul smiled up to Craig.

"Are you still sure?" he asked, not wanting to force Craig to do anything he didn't want to. Not that he didn't want him so badly that it hurt, but John Paul wanted Craig to want to do this.

Craig's answer was to kiss John Paul hard and passionately. He pushed John Paul back down onto the duvet and continued to ravish his best mate's mouth.

------

It could've been weeks later, months even, when John Paul awoke. He glanced at the digital clock on his bedside table. Seven forty-five. It had only been hours. Mere hours. But they had passed by so blissfully.

John Paul remembered all of the loving touches, the kisses that Craig gave him as he thrust into him. Looking down, he saw his lover's head on his chest, arms grasping his sides.

Smiling down at Craig, he gently lifted him up and laid his body down beside him as he rolled over, closer to the edge of his bed. Craig's eyes opened slowly, his hands rising to rub the remaining sleep from his eyes.

Propping himself up on one elbow, John Paul allowed himself to gaze over the slightly tanned skin on the body beside him.

"How did that happen, eh?" he asked, using his other hand to run through Craig's hair, "I've dreamt about that for a long time now."

Turning in the bed, Craig moved in the opposite direction of John Paul. His tears raced down his cheeks as he threw the pillow over his head, sobbing.

"Craig, what's wrong?" John Paul asked.