Title: Super Skinner

Author: Shadow's Echo (also known as Cindy from CindyandSandy)

Rating: PG

Disclaimer: I do not own Chris Carter or any characters from X-Files or the actors or their children or their wives or any movies their wives star in....or the Scooby- doo theme song. I do, however, own Super Skinner. I also own the ridiculously stupid, yet, convenient ending.

Chapter 1-The Only Chapter. Unless I decide to do the Chronicles of Skinner which will consist of many of the dumb things skinner has done in his lifetime....Pretty much just a dumb compilation of the things I wrote about him.

The Scooby-Doo theme plays. Super Skinner jumps in out of nowhere! He is here to save the- David: This is stupid, Chris! Super Skinner does not exist, but yet Mitch believes he does? He's a grown man! He knows better and so do you! Why do you let him do it?!

Chris: Look, David, Mitch says he's gonna quit if I don't let him do this.

David: So?

Chris: Good point.

Gillian: Let him quit. He can't survive two days without a job. No one else will hire him, and he spends his money like a six-year-old boy. He won't last.

Mitch appears in his Super Skinner costume (which consists of a purple cape with a Superman-like spandex suit, which is the color purple also. The letter on the front, instead of S, is and M, for Mitch. That is kind of hard to explain, the fact that he is called Super Skinner, but, yet, his costume has an M on it. He is, although, an idiot, and that alone should explain enough.)

Mitch: Hey, Chris, guess what! I have a Super Skinner salute now! Wanna see?

Chris, obviously trying to keep Mitch from feeling hurt: Sure.

Mitch: OK! He puts his right hand into a fist and shakes it in the air above his head. Then he does the same with his left hand. Next he does the mocarrina, horribly. Then he gets down on all fours and sticks his tongue out and barks like a dog. Finally he stands up, kicks his left foot into the air, and smiles.

Chris, Sarcastically: Nice.

Mitch, not noticing any sarcastic tones at all: Thanks! I thought it would look real cool and then I did it in the mirror and it looked even better!

Gillian accidentally lets a small giggle escape her lips. Bad move.

Mitch: You thought it...::starts to cry::...it...was funny? It wasn't! Was it, Chris?!

Chris, on the verge of laughing himself: No!...no...Mitch...it wasn't-

Mitch: It is Super Skinner! I'm in costume! You guys are the only ones who know my secret identity! You can't tell any one! Chris: Oh, oh! Sorry, Mi-- I mean, Super Skinner. We won't let any one know.

Mit—I mean Super Skinner: Good because if anyone finds our then you'll regret it.

He stomps away angrily. All three wait until he is out of hearing distance, and they all fall over laughing.

David, gasping for breath: I wonder...if...he intentionally does this...just to make...make us laugh!

Gillian: Or maybe...he's not smarter than Piper!

They laugh harder.

Piper appears: I'm not smart, mommy?

Gillian: Oh, honey, you're very smart! You are smarter than Mitch, that's what I was saying.

Piper: Ooooh! That's neat! I've never been smarter than a grown up before.

Gillian: You are now, sweety.

Piper gives one of her perfect, pearly white smiles and runs off to play. They continue to laugh.

Next day at work Super Skinner: I am here to...what's my line?

Chris: There is no line. Mitch, you have to understand—

Super Skinner, teeth clenched: I'm in costume.

Chris: Super Skinner, you have to understand, this is not a TV show! Super Skinner is just a stupid character that—

Super Skinner starts to cry.

Chris: Oh, no! You don't get me that easy! I am not going to make you a TV show!

Super Skinner cries harder.

Chris: NO!!

Super Skinner blows nose on cape.

Chris:...OK! OK! I'll make you a show, just shut UP!

Super Skinner stops crying and flashes him smile as big as Texas (actually it was a s big as Alaska because Alaska is bigger than Texas. Alaska is the biggest state in the U.S. ((Who says you can't learn geography from fanfics?)))

So Chris makes Super Skinner a TV show called Super Skinner (of course). And (I'd hate to say it but...) the ratings skyrocketed. The ratings were so great it was unbelievable (even to the X-Files). Chris was better a kid shows that he was at...well, anything! David and Gillian were asked by Super Skinner himself to star in the show as co-stars or just guest stars, but, to Super Skinner's dismay, they declined. Piper loved the show. She watched it everyday. She was so proud to know that she was smarter than the greatest superhero ever. Every morning there were crowds around the gates to Mitch's house, the majority being screaming children and overly irritated parents wanting to go home. There was no question about it, Super Skinner was the most loved person in the world.

Mitch loved the attention. But as the years went by the show began to get boring and Super Skinner began to get old. They needed something new and fresh on the show...but what? Then Chris had the idea-of-a-lifetime...Tea Leoni! So Super Skinner was kicked off his show and Tea began her new career as Miss Super Stupid. The show was renamed Miss Super Stupid. The ratings skyrocketed again. Mitch became depressed over loosing his show and relented to killing himself, and the X-Files ratings went up because of this. Tea Leoni later died because she starred in a movie called Jurassic Park IV and one of the mechanical dinosaurs ate her. Both of these things put together made David and Gillian's lives a lot happier. Piper was sad when the show was lost, but regained happiness when Tea died and her mother moved in with David. Well, I hope that was the ending everyone wanted (however stupid it may be). Thanx for readin'!