It would be easy to end it right then and there.
Aticus Murina had many options. Failed concoctions that would not spread, or killed far too quickly, or didn't cause enough suffering. The young troll gazed up at the cabinet full of plagues and poisons, trying to gather the strength to stand back up.
The headaches were especially bad tonight, causing him to pass out while at his workstation, brewing another half-assed disease that couldn't kill a malnourished nut creature. He knew it angered the spirits hounding his mind, but sometimes he gave as little effort as possible. They howled in voices only he could hear, pounding on the barrier of his sanity. Enough to crack, but never to break. Sometimes he wished they would pound too hard, just so he would no longer have to endure their torment.
It really would be so easy.
Gathering what little strength he had, Aticus rolled onto his front and heaved himself up with the help of an open drawer. He staggered to his chair and collapsed in it, his glasses sliding down his sweat-slick face. The conquered spirits lowered their endless enraged din, perhaps sensing their host's intentions and not wishing to drive him to that point just yet. They had to enact their revenge against the troll race, and they couldn't do that without a troll to channel themselves into. It was all about them, after all.
Idly, he pushed his glasses back into place, giving the plagues cabinet another look. It would be poetic and subtle, to infect himself and die painlessly. But there was a second method he noticed, lying on the counter across the hall, in the mealblock. He stared at the knife, fluorescent light glinting off the blade sharply. A toxic-green pool seeping out from his body would be a good final statement to his tormentors.
Aticus rose once more, walking to the mealblock even as the spirits grew ever more agitated, screaming in their infinite voices at him. His head pounded, and he felt as if it would burst from the pressure. A grim smile came to his lips at the thought. Now wouldn't that be ironic?
Gripping the edge of the countertop, he picked up the knife.