Bejeweled
Summary: Belinda Baggins is more like her mother than anyone knew. Gandalf invites her on a quest where she makes friends, learns about dwarf culture, and maybe even finds love. Though no small amount of chaos and adventure will surely be found as well. Fem!Bilbo, Bagginshield, and more.
A/N: My Bilbo is a female named Belinda…and she's more like her Took mother Belladonna so she has more of an attitude/backbone than Bilbo. This story will involve pairing her with Thorin eventually but not before others try to gain her favor ^.^
Chapter 1
Belinda Baggins of Hobbiton was a perfectly respectable Hobbit. She never went on adventures or did anything unexpected. Her life was completely normal…and sometimes she grew quite restless but she always stamped it down and went about her normal routine. To be honest she had been fond of adventuring and mischief as a small, but after losing her parents she'd been forced to grow up and quickly. She had learned to live with an empty home, to cook for herself, to keep everything nice and clean, to tend her little garden, to go to the market, and to mend her own clothing. She even learned to be subtly sarcastic to people she didn't like and unfortunately had to learn how to steal back whatever silverware Lobelia Sackville-Baggins tried to make off with after a visit.
It was a fine sunny day, while she was tending to her little garden, that a tall man cloaked in grey robes with a pointed hat and a large walking stick stopped outside of her gate. She looked up at him and frowned slightly in confusion.
"Good Morning sir."
The man's reply was nothing short of confusing and it took her mind several moments to try and sort through it.
"What do you mean? Do you mean to wish me a good morning, or do you mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not, or perhaps that you feel good on this particular morning, or do you simply mean that it is a morning to be good on?"
Her face crinkled in her confusion and she huffed softly before replying in a slightly hesitant voice.
"All of them at once…I suppose. Can I help you with something?"
"That remains to be seen. I'm looking for someone to share in an adventure."
Belinda's eyes widened slightly and she started to shake her head but a soft voice in the back of her mind, sounding suspiciously like her long-deceased mother, urged her to reconsider her choice. She looked up at the man with a soft smile of amusement on her lips.
"You do realize that you are in Hobbiton? The land of the ever-dull and non-adventurous Hobbits?"
She could see the man's lips twitching as if fighting back a smile and decided to add more, only to have him interrupt her first.
"I see. Does this mean that you are not interested Belinda? Here I thought you'd inherited more of your mother's side of the family."
She could hear his amusement and let out a soft huffing laugh before tilting her head at him.
"Before I answer your question I must ask one of my own. How do you know me, or my mother for that matter?"
The man's eyes crinkled as he smiled and Belinda found herself smiling back.
"You know my name my dear, though you do not remember that I belong to it. I am Gandalf and Gandalf means…me."
Belinda's eyes lit up as a soft laugh escaped her.
"The wandering wizard? The one with the fireworks?"
At his nod she gave him a small curtsy and grinned.
"Well then…In that case I will indeed join you on your…adventure Mister Gandalf."
Gandalf's grin widened and he chuckled softly.
"Most excellent my dear. I shall return around supper time with the rest of the company…thirteen in all. I do hope you have plenty of meat on hand."
With those words the wizard motioned her into her house and after she closed the door he carved a small mark on it. Belinda immediately went to get her market bag and set off to go and buy some more meats. Once she had arrived back home she started preparing everything she'd need. She managed, barely, to drag her extra table into the dining room to make on long table out of two. Upon this long table she set out any food items that did not require cooking or baking to be eaten. There were vegetables with her special herbal dipping sauce, biscuits and honey, breads and jams. She had several ovens and a very large stove, always handy when her took cousins came to visit, so she had no difficulty in cooking many kinds of meats at once. She had roasted pork, sautéed fish, perfectly seared steaks, and plenty of bacon. She even went so far as to set several kinds of pies into the ovens to start baking. She had just finished laying out all but the pies, which she'd placed on a windowsill to cool for a bit, when a loud knock came at her door.
Belinda checked her dress and hair, a mass of soft honey-gold curls that cascaded down her back, before opening the door. What she found on the other side was a rather intimidating dwarf, partially bald and tattooed with a very large war-hammer in his hands.
"Dwalin, At your service."
Belinda gave him a bow and returned the greeting.
"Belinda Baggins, at yours. If you'll follow me I'll show you to the dining room. I'm sure you've traveled a long way and are likely quite hungry. I have plenty for you to choose from."
As they reached the dining room she was rather amused to see the intimidating dwarf take on a rather stunned look before turning to her.
"Ye cooked all this yerself Lassie?"
"Of course I did…Do you see anyone else in here?"
She had to bite her tongue to hold back a giggle as he actually looked around for a moment before his hunger took control and led him to the food. She stood in the doorway and watched in horrified fascination as he practically inhaled an entire fish in mere seconds. She heard the bell ring and sighed softly as she went to answer it. An older dwarf with snow white hair stood on the threshold and introduced himself as Balin. She was about to lead him to the dining room when Dwalin stepped into view and the two exchanged a rather amusing greeting before sharply butting heads, making Belinda wince though she was surprised they seemed to feel nothing.
"Is that normal for dwarves?"
"Is what normal Lass?"
Dwalin looked confused as she motioned to their heads and Balin chuckled softly and answered her query.
"Aye lass. We dwarves have very thick skulls. Siblings often greet each other like that…form of affection really."
Belinda eyed them oddly as they headed back towards the dining room and she shook her head as the bell rand yet again. The two dwarves on the other side this time appeared to be rather young, and quite cute for that matter. She lost her fight to hold back a soft laugh as they introduced themselves and bowed in unison.
"Well aren't you two just adorable? Come on then. I imagine you boys are hungry and there is enough food in my dining room to feed a small army."
The mention of food was all it took to have both young dwarves dropping their things by the door and racing each other to the food, much to Belinda's amusement. They reminded her of some of her Took cousins when mushrooms were mentioned. She once again stood in the doorway and observed the horrid table manners that she was beginning to realize were common for dwarves. She was about to say something when another knock sounded on the door and she huffed a bit as she went to open it, only to have a large group of dwarves literally tumbled into her entryway. A highly amused Gandalf was standing behind them and chuckling as the little Hobbit shook her head at the Dwarf-pile on her carpet.
"Oh my…you weren't kidding when you said a company were you Gandalf? Well then…up you lot get. I'd suggest you hurry to the dining room before the other four inhale all of the food."
No sooner had the word food left her lips did they all take off, skidding and bumping into each other in their haste to get fed. Belinda shook her head and frowned as food went flying across the room and landed in beard.
"They have no table manners whatsoever Gandalf…well…the older one Balin seems to be a tad more refined but honestly."
The disgusted look on her face actually caused several of the dwarves to tone it down a bit and try to eat a bit less like starving dogs. This mollified the hobbit lass a bit and she shook her head softly. A quick head count showed her they were one short and she quickly snatched portions of food, piling them on a plate with she set into a slightly warm oven so the late member could eat as well that night. As one of the dwarves walked by trying to use a doily to clean a mug she snapped a bit.
"That is a doily not a dishcloth."
"But it's full of holes."
"It's supposed to look like that, it's crochet."
"Oh and a wonderful game it is too…If you've got the balls for it."
She managed to turn and hide her grin as Gandalf thumped the one with the funny hat, on the top of the head with the end of his staff.
"Choose your words more wisely in the company of a lady Master Bofur."
As the youngest of the dwarves came up to her and asked about his plate the other two young ones started throwing her late mother's favorite dishes through the air. Poor Belinda nearly had a fit and screeched at them as the dwarves all started singing about things she hates. By the time their song was over she was torn between the urge to strangle them all and the urge to cry in relief that nothing seemed to have been broken. Gandalf seemed about to say something to her when three loud bangs echoed through her home from the direction of the door. A silence fell over the previously rowdy dwarves and everyone headed for the door, Belinda behind Gandalf in the lead. As the wizard opened the door a broad back was revealed, clad in a furred cloak of a deep blue. Belinda found herself admiring both the workmanship of the cloak, as well as the obvious strength in the braod shouldered back that it was draped over. As the new dwarf turned around Gandalf introduced him to her.
"Belinda my dear. This is Thorin Oakenshield, the leader of this company."
The dwarf looked down at her with obvious contempt as he circled her.
"So…this is the Hobbit? Tell me Miss Baggins…have you done much fighting? Axe or sword? Which is your weapon of choice?"
Belinda gave him a sharp glare that had all of the younger dwarves backing away from her, and a couple of the older ones as well.
"First off you have entered into MY home so I suggest you mind your manners and cease with being so rude. Secondly I use neither axe nor sword…I prefer the bow actually."
Thorin looked taken-aback for a moment at her sharp tone before giving his snickering nephews a sharp look that only made them snicker louder. He opened his mouth to speak but the hobbit cut him off, shocking him yet again.
"Thirdly…if you can manage to be civil for a few moments I managed to save you a plate of food."
Belinda sauntered off towards her kitchen, her little hips swaying side to side as she went and more than one dwarves head followed the movement. She threw a little smirk over her shoulder as Thorin stood gaping at her daring insolence.
"You're supposed to say Thank you…just in case you managed to forget your manners."
She vanished into kitchen as Fili and Kili looked at each other before collapsing on the ground in a fit of laughter. Thorin gave them both another glare and waved the company into the dining room, scowling at anyone that so much as grinned in his direction. Belinda sashayed back into the room and placed the plate of warm food in front of the brooding leader before skipping over to sit by a smirking Gandalf. Thorin looked over at her and gave a soft murmur of thanks before turning to the food. Belinda was pleased to see that this one at least had table manners and actually used the silverware to eat the food…not to make music. After he was done eating the discussions began about their quest and all that was involved.
When Bofur started teasing her about the dragon she almost yelled but then decided to be a bit sly and act faint and panicked. She let herself go limp, a trick she'd learned was very good at getting her mischievous cousins to stop teasing her. The ploy worked and several dwarves yelled at Bofur for frightening her so badly. Thorin glanced at Gandalf, who was making no move to go to her aid, and decided to take matters into his own hands and went to pick her up only to find her shoulders shaking in laughter. It took him quite an effort o avoid a small grin of his own when he realized she was merely tricking Bofur. The dwarf prince shook his head and went back to the table as Belinda returned to the kitchen once again…taking most of the dwarves attentions with her as they stopped listening to their leader in favor of trying to figure out what she was up to.
Belinda came into the room balancing three pies on each arm, sliding them off and onto the table with practiced ease. The dwarves eyes went wide and several hands were smacked with a spatula as they reached for the baked goodies.
"Oh no you don't…you boys want that pie you'll have to show some proper table manners first. Starting with using the silverware to eat with instead of banging it on the table."
Between Belinda's pointed glares and Thorin's raised eyebrow several dwarves shrank down and gave the hobbit maid sheepish looks.
"Sorry…we'll behave and be really polite…we promise…can we please have some pie Lady Belinda?"
Kili's adorably hopeful face did her in and Belinda laughed softly before nodding her permission. She turned to Thorin and, ignoring his harsh look, asked him a quiet question.
"Are they always like this?"
Thorin couldn't stop the smirk that crept over his lips in response, answering her in an equally soft tone.
"No…sometimes they're much worse."
Belinda giggled softly and danced away as Bofur reached out to try and grab her by the waist. She twirled away from the company and into the living room, the rest following slowly. As a deep humming started among the group she found herself feeling a bit entranced…especially when Thorin's deep, rumbling bass voice started singing a low and haunting song. The words of the song, paired with the deep sadness she could sense in all of the dwarves, made Belinda's heart ache for them all. She stood and looked Thorin in the eyes as the song ended, resting one small hand upon his arm.
"I will help you in whatever ways I am able. For tonight I can offer you all warm and soft beds to sleep in…though I'm afraid you'll have to pair up as I only have six spare rooms."
The dwarves paired up with no complaints, more excited about the warm beds than she'd thought they would be. She pointed to the hallway that the spare rooms were in and sighed softly before turning to go to her own room. Thorin's large hand on her arm stopped her and she turned to him. His deep voice was softer as he spoke.
"Thank you for your hospitality Miss Baggins. Sleep well…we leave with the sunrise."
Belinda nodded and the two went their separate ways, oblivious to the watchful eyes of a certain wizard sitting by the fire.