I Like You A Latte

by pekkii

Bella: a angry impatient barista, who hates he job and her boss Edward: an impatient, angry barrister who thrives on the power his job offers. Tired of the same sad excuse for coffee, Edward heads to Piccolo, where he goes on to piss of the wrong barista. All Bella wants to do is leave on time, but Edward is determined to make it as hard for her as possible as often as possible..

1. Espresso Yourself

'Hi, can I get a regular half skim, half full fat latte? But made with half decaf half regular coffee, half strength? Also, can you heat the milk to 100 degrees, with less froth and two and a half sugars?"

My response to this complex order was to simply blink slowly at the woman ordering this absurd coffee. Did she realize that some of her order canceled each other out? But, as I was constantly reminded by my lovely boss Alec (who we dubbed Kumar, don't ask!) I simply smiled in response, and using my best retail voice, which I was told sounds both overly polite and semi-patronizing, agreed to make her abomination of a coffee. But got help her if she decided to complain...

"That'll be $4.60 thanks."

"No problem.' Dumb bitch responded, while handing over a large chunk of change, literally ALL coins, that she proceeded to place on the counter between us, instead of my outstretched hand. She ten proceeded to walk off, complaining about the ever inflating price of coffee.

"Which order are you up to?" I ask Jake, who I could practically kiss due to the fact that he is probably one of the best workers here, apart from me of course.

"This one." He says pointing to a very pointless sugar free vanilla latte that has five sugars in it.

"What's with this order?"

He of course is talking about what dumb bitch just ordered.

"Just make it." I say rolling my eyes, and continuing to make the shots.

Just as Jake is carefully pouring the 100 degree milk into the cup of amazingly stupid coffee, dumb bitch walks up to the counter complaining that it took too long, and it wasn't made to her exact specifications. Its 8 in the morning, and I can't deal with this right now. You know what else I cant deal with? My boss's reaction to this.

"Don't worry, I make a new one. They no know what they doing." He really does speak like that...he also can't tell the difference between a flat white and a cappuccino, but WHAT DO I KNOW!

When she finally gets her drink, she leaves, but not before yelling that she'll never be back. Then proceeds to walk around telling customers that our shop is the worst around.

This, my friends is a typical day at Piccollo (Italian for little by the way...). Rude customers, busy periods and an overbearing boss who makes shift that much more pleasant (insert sarcasm here.)