1. Aftermath

Day 1

One morning the smell of someone approaching woke me up. Then I heard the knock. I'd forgotten about the sign I had posted outside my apartment's door, so I didn't make an effort aside from putting pants on. For that reason, I didn't expect to see a woman outside. Your hair was a braid over your head like a crown and you wore a long dress, almost like you wanted to make it obvious you were or wanted to be a maid. Of course I didn't think of that until you spoke.

''Who are you?'' I first asked, trying to level my voice ''And what do you want?''

''Mister… Logan, right?'' You took the paper taped on the door and showed it to me. The voice I heard was different from what I expected. It sounded like it came from the back of your throat, a bit deeper than your very feminine appearance suggested. ''I'm here because I thought I could be your maid.''

I re-read what I had written.

Need a live-in maid, open-minded.

-Logan

I almost didn't recognize what I had written. Maybe the vague wording was why you were the only one to show up. I thought you were naive about what I meant, otherwise I would've told you the job was yours in that moment.

''Huh... come in.'' I told you, still staring at my sign.

You said nothing, only walked and sat across me on the closest thing to a living room my apartment had.

''I just want to make sure things are clear before we see what happens.''

You just nodded.

''What's your name, first of all?''

''My name is'' you started as while reaching for something in your bag and took out paper and a pen to write your name.

I imitated the sound you made to pronounce your surname after you handed me the paper.

''Well, I see you're the traditional type.'' I told you, trying my best to be subtle ''But this isn't that kind of job.''

Your brows went higher like you didn't believe me.

''I'm willing to comply with whatever requests you have, Mr. Logan.'' you said, now looking at me.

Suddenly it felt dirty to even tell you what I had in mind, but I wasn't too ashamed.

''I was thinking you could wear more revealing clothes. Do you even own any?''

You frowned for a moment, then spoke. ''I do own many.''

It seemed difficult for me to imagine you in anything other than the only things I'd seen you wear.

''And maybe let your hair down too, it looks so serious and Old Europe.''

Again, you just nodded.

''And another thing'' I said ''We only have one bed.''

Now you seemed to get it, since you kept looking somewhere else so much I wasn't sure if you'd look at me again for a second. When you looked around I noticed a plastic thing in your ear. You bit your lip and I tried not to raise a brow to that.

''I can sleep on the couch.'' you said. Now that I understood the reason behind the way you spoke.

''No. I'll sleep there. I want you to always sleep on my bed. I won't even be always spending the night here, anyway.'' I said, and crossed my arms ''But I want to sleep on my bed at times, do you understand what I'm saying?''

''I understand, Mister Logan.''

''You can call me Logan.'' I told you ''In fact, I prefer it.''

You nodded and took out another paper to start talking about less interesting things.

''Well, I've made a monthly plan for all the housework I'll do and I think I've taken it all into account, but you can tell me of other things that you may want. I was thinking, since today is Saturday, I could start by washing the dish-''

''You want to start today?'' I asked as you handed me a copy of that plan.

There was silence for seconds.

''Yes, that's what I was thinking.''

''Alright'' I said, as you were trying to explain yourself further ''No, it's fine.''

''Look, I'm sure your plan is great, if not I'll tell you later'' I said as I let it fall on the table. ''But right now I just want to get to other things.''

The whole plan thing honestly didn't matter to me in that moment, and I was interested in why you were rushing to start working.

''Just tell me about yourself.'' I said.

You looked around for a moment. ''Um… I'm twenty-three, I've done housework for a long time before, I have translated from or to Romanian as a job a couple of times, I won't be too much of a nuisance, I go out sometimes and don't smoke or drink... It doesn't bother me if you smoke.''

I crossed my arms at the last part, which made your face red. I knew that place smelled very strongly of tobacco.

''I both drink and smoke.'' I told you, thinking it would bother you regardless of what you said.

''Most people I know smoke'' you told me ''I'm used to it.''

We discussed payment afterward, and although I wanted to know about whether you had no place to stay at all that night, it felt wrong to ask about it too soon, and I figured we'd get to talk about it at some point, so I simply asked you to go get your stuff and whether you'd start working right after you came back.

''Oh, yes, and about that… can I bring my books in here?''

''Yeah, bring whatever.'' I said, and got up.

''I guess I should get going.'' you said, already getting up ''Well, it was nice meeting you, Logan, you seem like a nice man.''

As I stood up, I looked away after your 'nice man' comment, and tried to warn you ''Don't expect too much from me.''

It wasn't that hard for me to keep my attitude easy for those minutes, but I knew I wouldn't always be like that.

When you came back, I noticed most of your boxes were full of just clothes, but there was also a notebook and pens, and I could smell a small collection of perfumes somewhere. Another box with books. One of the books I recognized was a copy of Watchmen. In order to remember what I read from it, I picked it up and flipped through the pages.

''Do you like this more?'' you said as you came out of the bathroom with different clothes on. It was a less-costumey version of a Halloween French maid dress: A black dress, white collar and white apron with lace on the straps. You still covered your legs with thick black tights, but the dress was short enough to let me see their shape. I hadn't realized I didn't reply until you spoke again.

''I made it myself.''

''I like it, but we're close to summer'' I said ''Aren't the tights too much?''

You looked down to look at your legs ''A bit, but it's part of it… I have a knee-length dress and some other longer ones, I would wear those without tights.''

I put the book down on the bed and looked at you.

''Cut all your dresses as short as this one and wear the tights when it's cold. The work will make you need less warmth anyway.''

You took your collar with your fingers ''I need to fix the hems once I cut them and I don't have a way of having my sewing stuff here.'' you said ''And besides, I prefer not to do that.''

''I'll give you space for those things. You can use the room here, it's basically empty.'' I told you, pointing at the room beside the bathroom and in front of the bedroom. ''In fact, you can have all your stuff in there.''

Just after I was done talking, I handed you Watchmen.

''I can bring my sewing machine here?'' you asked me, taking the book and bringing it to your chest as you kept talking ''Thank you so much, I do have a lot of stuff, I wouldn't have known how to get it all in this room.''

''You can thank me by taking off the tights and all I said.'' There were seconds of silence after I said this.

''Alright'' You handed the book back to me and went inside the bathroom again.

''I gotta say, I wouldn't have expected you to read stuff like this.'' I said when I couldn't see you anymore.

''I think it's a great book.'' I heard from inside ''It's just very well written and… I kinda have a crush on Edward Blake, after all.''

''The Comedian?'' I flipped through the pages again to make sure it was who you were referring to.

Silence.

''He's a horrible guy.''

''Yeah.'' you said, and I heard you sigh ''But you know, there's something about his personality. Maybe him being so reckless and confident, kind of… arrogant, that makes him not as bad.''

I couldn't help but give a short laugh ''He's a fucking rapist.''

You probably decided not to judge my language out loud ''Well, kinda. But Sally loved him anyway, there must have been some reason. I'm not saying it makes it okay, but I just have a thing for him. Besides, haven't you also done things before that are just plain wrong?''

Maybe that's why I hated Blake especially.

You came out without me replying, and I looked at your legs before anything else.

''Nice.'' I said ''Doesn't it feel better?''

Your hand smoothed out the fabric over your legs. ''It does, in a way.''

''Well, I think I'll start washing the dishes now.'' you said.

As I walked towards the bedroom, I heard your voice again.

''Logan.'' You called.

''Mm?''

There was some silence and I heard you sigh ''Sorry about that comment.'' you said without turning around.

''Which one?''

''About you having done bad things.'' then you turned to look at me ''That… I had no reason to assume it.''

Having thought of answering with 'You were right anyway', I kept it to myself, thinking you'd rather not know, at least not too soon.

''It's whatever.''

Giving you some space finally, I went to the bed that soon I wouldn't sleep in. Although I had nothing against you, it was tiring to be around people for too long, even if just one. The sound of water running in the kitchen made me go back to the sleep that was interrupted when you first arrived. At some point, the sound stopped. After some minutes, and thinking I might have been paranoid about it, I walked out of the room to find I was somewhat right. You were spread on the kitchen floor, and I kneeled to touch your arm and make sure it was just sleep.

''Hm?'' I heard as you opened your eyes.

''You fell asleep'' I told you ''I think.''

''Oh, yeah'' you said, and rubbed your face with your fist ''I was dreaming about my tights tearing.''

''Huh'' I simply said, and helped you get up after you rolled face down and took my hand. You took the edge of the kitchen countertop for balance.

''You can take off your heels if you want.'' they were thick and short, but I imagined that it made a difference to not have them on anyway.

''No, it's alright.'' you told me and turned to look at the sink. There wasn't much left to be washed.

''Just take a nap.'' I said ''It's still morning, you have time for it all, I'm sure.''

You took your wrist with your other hand ''Yes, Logan.''

When I figured you were done, I went out of the bedroom again and saw the sink clear and the dishes organized and shining on the drying rack. You were sleeping on the couch with an arm over your eyes, maybe to cover it from the light. Your heels were still on, but your feet were on the air since the couch wasn't big enough, and your apron was folded on the countertop.

''Nothing like a fresh start, right?'' I asked after you woke up by yourself.

While you lifted yourself enough to sit, you looked at me from the couch.

''What do you mean?''

''Well, one day you're suddenly living with some guy you just met.'' I sat on the countertop and you frowned, probably at that.

You took a deep breath ''I should get cooking, it's not too far from midday. Do you have any allergies?''

''No'' I told you ''Why?''

''Well, you don't have much to work with here so I figured I'd get some stuff myself.'' you said as you got up and straightened your dress.

''You know, I'm still sleepy even though I slept well last night.'' you told me ''I also noticed you don't have a coffee maker.''

''It's not my drink of preference'' I said.

''Yeah, your fridge's content gives it away.''

That was the last thing you told me before you left but I noticed a smile just before you closed the door.

I kept drinking until you were back. I had to enjoy my time alone for what it was. Since the stuff you brought was new to me, I browsed through it. One of your bags had cosmetics, and I looked through the pencils, mascara and rouge to find a body lotion I recognized as the one you had been wearing. After that, I went through everything else you had, and although I considered myself someone who wasn't too concerned with other's business, it kept me drinking there until you were back. I had put it all in the spare room to have an excuse in case you noticed someone had been rummaging. When I started noticing the sweet scent of that lotion again, I went to the living room and acted like I had been there all along.

''Hey.'' you said just that when you walked through the door with just a few small bags and a paper cup with coffee.

''Had fun?'' you asked before I could think of something better than 'hi' to reply with. I thought for a second you knew about me looking through your boxes, then I remembered you commented on the drinking just before you left.

''Uh, yes, actually.'' I told you ''So, how did you get money for that?''

''My parents gave me some.'' you said, and sipped coffee ''Before they realized I'd start living with a man I wasn't married to.''

''Huh, I never looked at it that way.'' I said to myself, you probably weren't able to hear it, since you didn't reply to it. After tossing the empty paper cup and looking at me, you spoke.

''So the plan was to wash dishes, tidy all rooms and cook today. There isn't much of a mess in any room so I'll just organize my stuff and get it to the other room, is that alright?''

''Yeah, I already moved your stuff to the other room, actually.''

You turned to look at me.

''Oh'' you said and started taking stuff out of the bags ''Well, thanks. I'll take care of that later, then.''

After you were done with apparently everything you had to do for that day, you just went to the room that was empty before to get your stuff out of the boxes. I didn't have anything to do, and although it was too soon to trust you with the house alone since I didn't know you much, my need to drink surrounded by people I didn't know was too strong. There was no sound after I knocked on the door to tell you I was leaving. This made me open the door and see you asleep on the floor again. A part of me did think it was weird, but I just decided to pick you up and leave you on the bed. I left a note on the floor since I imagined you were quick to get freaked out.

Day 2

In the morning, before the sun could rise, the bedroom door opened and you looked at me. I had been awake for a while, so I probably looked like I was waiting for you to wake up. I was lying down on the couch and the first thing I could see was the hallway.

''I didn't fall asleep on your bed.'' you just said.

''You say it like I didn't know.'' I realized after talking that my arms were crossed.

You breathed in and looked away ''I mean no disrespect, and I'm so grateful you let me stay here'' you said ''But I think it's better not to be… touched while I'm asleep.''

It was the comment I least expected. Only a few times before had I been told I was being close to someone too soon.

''Guess I didn't think of that.'' I said, and then uncrossed my arms ''Alright. But you can be sure I didn't do anything other than carry you.''

''I believe you'' you said ''I just don't feel comfortable with the idea right now.''

I did doubt your willingness to believe me.

''I mean it, I wouldn't risk losing the only woman interested in the job.'' I said ''You know for how long that sign had been there?''

''No'' you replied, raising your brows.

''Neither do I'' I said ''Long enough I even forgot it was there.''

You smiled, sadly you probably expected me to smile back.

''So why did no one else show up?''

I didn't know how to answer, so I kept silent for seconds. For starters, I didn't actually know. It was likely that the neighborhood knew I was a mutant, but since no one had ever told me anything related to it, I couldn't assume. Usually people just avoided my gaze or stared. Some women even clutched at their purses like I was about to take them. I couldn't tell this to you, so I made up whatever seemed realistic ''Most maids wouldn't want to work for a guy that drinks and smokes too much. And I guess I have that reputation.''

You sat on the armrest.

''I have to admit'' you told me ''When I woke up I thought you'd gone out to drink, but you seem pretty sober.''

My hands were behind my head, probably showing you my hairy armpits. Of course I wasn't about to tell you that I had been drinking but by the time I went back to the apartment I was sober again. Since I didn't reply, you got up again and left, I guessed it was to go back to sleep.

When I woke up again you had just come out of the shower. I only knew because your hair was up in a towel the way women always wrap it. I could see you just for a second when you were walking from the bedroom towards the room with all your stuff. Both your towel and bathrobe were light pink, a color that I'd eventually learn to associate with you. When you were done getting dressed, you went out to the bedroom for something, and left the door open after going to back to your room. You started putting on makeup. I stared from the hallway like I was watching a movie, just for how foreign it felt. A person in front of me, sitting on the floor with a mirror standing and facing towards them, in silence, not even rushing. Even me looking at someone for minutes, not doing anything in particular, felt somewhat alien. When you were done, you took a hair dryer and took out the plastic piece in your right ear.

''Logan.'' you said, and I realized you had noticed me with the mirror. You turned your head to look at me.

''Huh.'' I just said and started walking elsewhere. Although you probably didn't even get to hear that, it was hard to think of appropriate reactions to things that were unfamiliar, and there were a couple of those even if I had been living for a long time.

You came out some minutes later, with redder cheeks. Still, you didn't let me see your hair let down, it was now two braids. Then I noticed your dress was longer than the day before.

''You know, I don't think it's necessary to wear your uniform on the weekends.'' I told you, and you replied as you looked inside of the fridge and the cupboard, to find just the stuff you'd bought before and dark green bottles taking the rest of the space.

''Don't worry, I'll cut them all shorter today.'' you said, taking things out to start cooking. That told me you knew what I really wanted.

''You'll have to show me some of your other clothes at some point.''

''I guess I'll do, but I prefer the uniform when I'm working.''

I kept myself from asking, but I wondered whether it was because you wanted onlookers (or yourself) to know you were there for work.

''And your hair?'' I asked ''I told you to let it down sometime.''

''Maybe when I go out.'' I knew you were just trying to make me leave the subject with that, so I kept on going while you didn't look at me, being busy with the kitchen stuff.

''In that case why don't I take you out for lunch today?''

I'm not sure I even particularly wanted to see you with your hair down and different clothes, but I guessed there was something satisfying about convincing you to do something you were mildly reluctant to do. And in any case cooking three times a day was probably tiring on top of everything else.

''Well, I'm not opposed to that'' you told me after you turned around to look at me.

After this, you went to make your bed while the pans were heating. I took several cans of beer with me to the living room while you weren't there, maybe to avoid any looks from you. When you came back I was already sitting and drinking, but your gaze didn't even go near me, you went directly towards the stove. Perhaps I was trying to annoy you, but I put the can down and took out a cigar from its box. As if you could smell it before it was even lit, you stopped doing whatever you were doing and walked towards the living room to open its window. After this, I got up told you I'd be leaving and come back in some hours.

''You don't want to have breakfast?''

''I can do without it.''

I guess in a way I wanted an excuse to be alone for longer. Having met you the day before was nice and all, but I preferred to not be constantly near someone. Now that I've thought about it more, I recognize that I'd rather be surrounded by people I'm not close to. I like to think I'm more self-aware than people give me credit for. In any case I was actually doing you a favor by not smoking near you.

When I came back, you were in your room. Now there was a table, and over it a sewing machine and rolls of fabric and thread on the floor. Your uniform dresses were hanging from the chair beside the small table. After noticing me going inside the room, you turned around.

''Hey'' you said

''You've made them shorter already?'' I asked. Sitting down, you started to fix the thread in the sewing machine.

''No, I only got to get these things in here.'' You said, then looked at me ''Thanks again for the space.''

''It's nothing. I don't need as much as you do.'' I recognized how my words could have been taken almost as soon as I finished talking.

''I guess that's true.'' you told me and turned your back to me again, working on the machine. At the time the first word to come to mind when I thought of you was 'high maintenance'. I also imagined what words you associated with me. 'Rude' was probably there somewhere. I started walking out and you spoke.

''Logan.'' you faced me to say.

''Hm?''

''I didn't mean to imply you couldn't smoke here.'' you said ''Sorry for that.''

''No, don't worry about it'' I said ''I shouldn't expose you to that.''

While you washed the dishes, I went back to my bedroom and kept drinking. I spent an hour or so sitting on the bed until you walked in. You had changed clothes. It was a light pink dress, long but showed cleavage with the top part making a heart-shape over your breasts. Your makeup stayed the same but your hair was mostly down, wavy because of the braids from before.

''Are we, um… going out?'' you asked.

''Ah, yeah.'' I told you. I got up to take my wallet and jacket, thinking you would need it. As we walked out of the complex, I glanced a couple of times to notice how your breasts bounced slightly as you went down the stairs with me.

When we arrived to the parking lot, I walked towards the driver's side, and turned around to find you behind me.

''I'll be driving.'' I told you.

You didn't know where I was driving us, so I just went to a place near one of the bars I spent the most time in. I saw white and blue tablecloths.

''So you like Greek food?'' you asked after we had a table.

''I don't know. I just thought you'd like it.''

That was a lie, obviously.

''I kind of do.'' you said and looked around.

''This is a cute place'' you said ''Plants everywhere.''

''So what do you work as?'' you asked after ordering, a bit louder than you talked before. Since we arrived, many more people had gotten tables near us, and I guessed the background noise made it harder for you to hear.

''That's kind of complicated'' I said. Before I could go on, you turned your left ear towards me and pointed to it. I imagined you meant you heard better from that one, so I got closer to it to speak.

''I'm usually a mailman''

''Usually?'' you asked, looking at me for the explanation.

''I've gotten to do stunts a couple of times.''

You pushed your glass further from you to get your hands on the table ''Wow, really? movie stunts?''

''Not big screen, no.'' I told you.

''So you fight?''

I put my bottle down. ''Yeah, I guess I'm good at being violent.''

I didn't think you got my somewhat sarcastic tone from that, so I just kept talking.

''But I also do other stuff people consider dangerous, like being near fire, jumping off high places, and such.'' I was showing off at that point, but I stopped, realizing my usual job wasn't glamorous enough to boast about.

''I don't like violent stuff much.'' you said.

''That's great'' I told you ''Violence is nothing to admire, really.''

Then I wasn't sure you got that I wasn't sarcastic at all this time. I didn't bother to make it clear. I did, in a way, understand some finding violence revolting, but I also understood that these ways of thinking most likely came from places where violence was almost never necessary, so your image might have come from thinking it was just a stupid way to escalate small problems. You didn't talk again, until I did.

''So you were born here? Your parents are Romanian?''

''I was born in Los Angeles, then my parents moved here.'' you told me, about to finish your plate. I had been much faster ''And yes, they are Romanian.''

I made silence, unsure of what to say after that.

''Are your parents both American?'' you asked.

It made me silent for some seconds, but then I knew what to say.

''I'm actually Canadian.''

''Oh'' you said ''So you just… ended up here.''

You smiled after saying that. I didn't reply and just kept drinking.

''We should go to a Greek history museum sometime'' you told me.

As soon as we were back home, you went into your room, I guessed it was to start cutting your dresses. Later you got out, holding a trash bag, and found me outside of the apartment, smoking.

''Why don't you wait a few hours until it's full to take out the trash?'' I asked.

''I understand why you think that'' you told me, and put the bag on the floor ''I'm not very superstitious, but it's kind of a thing that we just don't take out the trash after dark. My family isn't either, but we'd rather be on the safe side, you know.''

I felt one of the sides of my mouth form a half-smile ''Yeah, I get it.''

You probably thought I was judging you, but it was a weird feeling to smile in front of someone.

When it seemed you were done with sewing, you got out of your room to the kitchen. I was then inside.

''I'm leaving tonight again'' I said ''Don't worry about dinner for me.''

''Are you sure?'' you asked.

''Yeah'' was the last thing I said before closing the door behind me.

My life was so different then, and the general feeling of everything was so weird to me. Especially since you arrived. I expected this since I asked for a maid, but it was hard for me to keep up with both domestic stuff and work, and I have to admit that being lonesome is different from being lonely. In the last two days you had been holding a mirror up to me, without knowing. I was living with someone who grew up and had lived all her life in a very human way. Not that I was jealous. I wasn't ashamed of being who I was, at all. My issue was that, as attracted as I felt to you, I couldn't get past the thought that your prejudice would make you disgusted at me if you ever found out I wasn't fully human. Not in the way you knew humans to be like, anyway.