She can feel the same butterflies she had when she first started her ice skating lessons. Except now they fill her with fear and anxiety, not the miniscule tension anyone would get when doing something for the first time.
Elise is here, she's finally here. She's about to face the ice in front of the whole world. She doubts herself, even after years of training she doesn't know if she can pull it off. She fears that she will mess up and fall down. She fears that she may not even get on the ice rink at all.
She turns her head around, trying to look for her coach; the one that could lift her up when she falls; the one who pushes her far beyond her boundaries and go towards success. But he isn't here.
She glances at the list of people that are going to perform
Alice Vargas – ITA
Elise Zwingli - SUI
Ivan Braginsky – RUS
'I'm going to go up soon…' she fears that he may not make it in time to give her a few last words before her performance, but most of all she fears that he may not even see the performance at all. She glances outside the corridor, seeing Alice Vargas glide on the ice swiftly.
'No, Elise, you can do this,' She reassures herself. Her heart races, frightened at the fact that Francis, her coach, won't make it to see her. He claimed he forgot something and told her to go on, promising he'll be there in time. Yet she looks back at the current skater, Alice, and feels her song almost ending and her move slowing down. But the music picks back up, giving Elise small hope.
'Elise!'
She feels a wave of relief as she turns to find out that it's Francis. He catches up to her, breathless and hands on his knees.
"I am so sorry." His breath barely even forms words, "Security and crowds, worst mix ever."
Elise laughs, feeling some of the butterflies flutter away. "I was so afraid you wouldn't make it. What did you even have to get?"
The song stops and the crowd erupts into applause. Elise feels the world stop around her, everything just froze. Her legs are stuck to the ground beneath her and she barely notices Alice making her exit, motioning for Elise to go.
"Elise?" She shakes herself out of it, noticing Francis's concerned tone.
"I'm fine."
"No, you're not." He places a hand on her shoulder, "Elise, let me tell you this really briefly. You're going to do really well and you have improved so much. It's why you are here, at the Winter Olympics. Just realize that."
"But," Elise whispers, "what if I mess up?"
"Plenty of people mess up here. It's natural. Numerous ice skaters fall down. But do you know what they do? They get right back up and act like it never happened."
Elise looks up to him, nodding. "Thank you…" She turns to get on the rink. Francis grabs her wrist. Elise needs to get on the rink and already feels herself shaking.
"Wait, you don't understand, Elise," Francis says, "I'm going to be really quick about this. But you do not understand how wonderful you are, how talented, and how much you improved since we met. You can do it, trust yourself."
Elise nods, mouthing a quick thank you and squeezes his hand. She turns to get on the rink and sees the world around her. All eyes are on her.
And before the music starts she reassures herself, 'If I fall down, I'll pick myself up.'
She knows she blew everyone away, she proudly admits that. The crowd rips into applause and whistling, feeling the flashes of cameras capture her movements and her last pose. Everything in her shivers from the ice and tingles from this blissful moment.
She skates fast towards the exit. Everything to her is blurry but she keeps going and ends up wrapped around resilient arms locked into an embrace.
"You did it! You did it! I knew you could!"
Elise laughs, unable to form words. Her heart flutters and she feels the butterflies come back, she couldn't explain how perfect this was.
He brings her down to the side bench to take her ice skates off. Elise didn't notice she was smiling the entire time, noticing when she remembered something. "Francis, you never told me what you forgot."
Francis takes a quick swig of water and holds up a hand signal to wait. He brings out a jacket and Elise slaps herself.
"You forgot your jacket, chère, do you know how cold it is here?"
Elise feels a bit perturbed, "You went to get my jacket because you thought I was going to be cold?"
Francis frowns at her, "Yes…and no. I'm telling you to not forget about you patriotism and to never forget small things that really are big." Francis drapes the Switzerland jacket around her and pats her back. She smiles, tugging the ends of the jacket closer around her; and cherishes this moment.