Charles was perhaps not the most work-oriented university professor. In fact, some would say he was the least. His students could count on deadlines being pushed back last minute, the other lecturers could count on scheduling conflicts, and the night staff didn't know him at all.
He noticed that many of his fellows had a similar schedule, and yet were blessed with a far better reputation. It would not have bothered him in the slightest, had he not been able to practically read their thoughts in their expressions.
He saw resentment reflected back on him in faces that were woken up far too early every day, in faces that had seen that one new piece-of-crap cartoon movie far too many times, in faces that held joy, responsibility, and a certain type of fear that he had never experienced. The faces that read 'I have a kid, what's his excuse?' This is what bothered him.
It was Raven who first planted the idea in his head. It was Raven who'd lead him to a very complicated predicament. Though that statement could be uttered many, many times throughout his life, it was perhaps at this point that Charles felt it was the most poignant.
"Why don't you just pretend you have a kid?" She'd said.
The very statement that had led him to staring intently at his computer screen, at an email with the banner 'Take your child to work day!' pride of place at the top, was now the predominant thought in his head. Other thoughts that drifted about included 'oh fuck' and 'I've screwed up, bad.'
Charles knew that this kind of thing was way too weird to be dismissed as his eccentricity, or his commitment to being able to skip work. He'd pretended to have a child. Photo on the desk and all. Raven found it absolutely hilarious.
He'd put up an ad to try and get someone, anyone to take enough pity on him to use them and their child for the day. It had been five days and there were absolutely no responses. Not a query nor a question. Nothing. He felt his case was hopeless.
That is, until, Raven came up with another of her ideas. "You've got the photo right? Just call the agency. They'll have the details surely." Charles lit up. "Raven you are brilliant. Absolutely brilliant." She smirked at him, brilliant white teeth flashing almost predatory behind her lips. "What can I say?"
Charles ignored her and set off quickly to find the image again. He vaguely remembered entering something like 'Happy six year old' into his search engine, and quickly retyped the words, smiling even wider when he saw the words highlighted in purple beneath, and reminded himself that he really should clean out his search history.
He found the picture on the fifth page - no need for anyone to go searching and find the exact same kid - and quickly found the agency. He realised suddenly that he had no idea how to approach this. 'Hey I saw a child on your website and used him for an excuse out of work can you please give me the contact details?' Didn't sound like it would be a big hit.
He searched around the site and found an 'actor' portion and scoured through it. Raven glanced over his shoulder and looked bemused, but didn't question it. After a while he found the same child, same picture and all. He sighed in relief and clicked the 'contact the agent' button.
Once he copied the number and dialled, he almost froze. He shook himself just before he heard the 'click' to indicate that the phone had indeed been picked up. "Hi. So this is going to sound weird but..."