Author's Note: Written for Salomesensei over at LJ. The prompt she gave me was: 'How about an IY "secret crush" fic - unexpected character has a (het) crush on someone. A little drabble of what the character might say if s/he had the guts would be fun. Someone having a secret crush on Naraku would be funny, but I'd love a more serious one just as well.'
How had it come to this?
He knew it was wrong. Unrealistic, impossible, doomed… But it was there; he could not help himself.
Late one night, he made up his mind to tell her.
He trusted in his senses to lead him to her, his footsteps crunching in the bed of dead leaves underfoot the only sound in the slumbering forest.
It was not too long before he felt her presence – somehow, he associated the lurch in his gut with her.
"Kikyou-sama?"
She was standing ankle-deep in the lake, her shinidamachuu circling around her body. Her eyes closed and arms outstretched, she seemed to be communicating with them in a language beyond words. The sight took his breath away – she was ethereal, mysterious, beautiful.
The miko's eyes opened in response to his voice and she walked back to shore. If Kikyou had been startled by his unexpected appearance, she did not show it.
"You," she said by way of greeting. Her composure and icy dignity made him feel as though he was speaking with a celestial maiden. "What brings you here at this time of night?"
He found himself blushing – like a mere village boy in the first bloom of puberty! – and he cleared his throat.
"I – I wanted to talk to you," he managed.
Kikyou came closer, the expression on her face never changing.
"About?"
He looked into her eyes, both repelled and fascinated by the lack of human warmth within.
"Kikyou-sama – " He was silenced by her fingers on his lips. The skin was strangely warm and soft; he had expected the hard, cold clay from which her body was made. Puckering his mouth, he kissed the fingertips, prompting a small intake of breath from her.
"I know what you are trying to say," Kikyou, began, not unkindly. "But I am sorry."
He understood. Bitter disappointment filled his heart as he took a step away. "I know. I had to let you know." The bile prevented from saying any more. In a dignified manner as he could muster, he disappeared from where he had come.
Her rejection – more gentle than he had reckoned – still hurt a lot more than he thought it would. Above it all, the little voice in his head was chiding him for being so affected; did he expect her to fall into his arms instantly?
She watched him go, a hint of pity touching her cold features. "I am sorry, Miroku-sama," she whispered.