A/N: This was supposed to be the last chapter however it turned out longer than I expected so I have split it into 3 parts. Even though part 1 doesn't have any 'M' elements, I thought it would be good to publish it again so it would flow better with the M versions of parts 2 and 3.
Chapter 3 Part 1
He loved spooning with his wife. He was on his left side and Jane's back was up against his chest, she was the little spoon even though she didn't feel that little at the moment, his right hand was resting on top of her large belly. Only a few more weeks left and they would be able to meet their daughter. It hadn't been an easy journey but every moment was worth it.
He remembered that he refused to let her out of his sight from the moment she left the hospital. He brought her back to his apartment under the excuse of 'making sure she was fine'.
"Kurt, I don't need to stay here, I'll be fine at the safe house."
Kurt just looked at her as if she was nuts.
"You'll be fine here. I can look after you here. I can make sure you eat and take the rest you need and recuperate…"
"Kurt, I'll be fine at the safe house. I promise I'll eat rest and recuperate…"
He could tell that she looked uncomfortable. He stayed with her in the hospital until she was released. He only left her room when she was examined by the medical staff and only then when she insisted she would be fine. When it was just the two of them in the room he would either be in the chair by her bed holding her hand or on the bed itself literally by her side. They talked for most of the time, mainly Kurt trying to convince her that they were actually together from now on and for the rest of the time he watched as she slept and they ate together.
He knew that she thought their 'relationship' was just for in the hospital and that everything would go back to the status quo now she was out.
"Jane, when you're in a relationship…"
Jane looked up sharply.
"…and the person who is the other half of you is unwell or has been in an accident or something else but when your partner needs you then you help them in any way you can and I will help you…"
"Weller!" Jane said in exasperation
"Jane, I entered that room and saw you on the ground! I thought you were dead. I started grieving for you…I can't go through that again…I can't…"
It wasn't only the words that got to her, Jane had never seen Kurt this open before the hospital and the words did get to her but it was the tears that were the deciding factor. She stepped forward and slowly raised her hands and her thumbs wiped away the tears that were flowing down his cheek. Once the tears had stopped she slowly wrapped her arms around his neck and she was surprised when he buried his face in her neck, she held on to him as he seemed to need it. When he was composed again he lifted his head and placed a sweet short kiss to her lips. It was tender and Jane smiled shyly. She stayed at his apartment from that day. Night time was awkward to say the least. He refused to let her sleep on the couch and she refused to sleep in his bed when he offered to take the couch.
"Weller I'll take the couch!"
"No way. I'll take the couch and you can have the bed."
"Kurt…"
"No, just no. Jane please take the bed. I need to know that you're ok after what I saw…"
"Fine but you can't use that anymore to get me to do whatever you want."
Kurt looked at her with innocent eyes.
"Don't even try to play the innocent with me." Snarked Jane
Kurt did look a little sheepish after being called out on his behaviour. So that night Jane went to sleep in his bed wearing his t-shirt and maybe only his t-shirt but he tried not to think about it, while he settled down on the sofa.
Something woke Kurt up; he looked at his cell and found it was only 1 am. He looked around the living room and was shocked to see Jane sitting in the arm chair wrapped in his duvet fast asleep. He really wanted to carry her back to his room, and ideally stay with her but that would be pushing it. He decided to leave her there as he knew she didn't usually sleep well but at that moment she seemed content. He closed his eyes to open them again at what felt like a couple of minutes later but turned out to be a few hours, just in time to see Jane wake up.
"Do you want to tell me why you slept out here for at least 5 hours?"
Jane shrugged her shoulders.
"Jane is there something wrong?"
"Noooo." Said Jane unconvincingly
Kurt sighed, he knew it wouldn't be easy and Jane wouldn't automatically open up to him now that they have confessed their feelings for each other but still.
"Jane?"
"It's too big." Jane whispered
Kurt was confused.
"What is? The t-shirt?"
Jane gave him an exasperated look.
"No, your bed."
"But it's a standard double; you have the same size in your safe house…"
"I know but yours seems bigger."
"Jane that doesn't make sense, what is really going on?"
"I…I…"
"Jane you can tell me anything, you know that right?"
Kurt watched as Jane nodded her head.
"So…?"
"I…I…just always assumed that if I was ever in your bed you would be with me. It was lonely last night so I came out here at around midnight."
Kurt was watching Jane turn bright red. He knew she wasn't referring to anything more than literally sleeping together.
"You're not sleeping on the couch, that's final."
"That's ok; this arm chair is really comfy."
"Jane are you going to do that every night? Go to bed then come out here later in the night? Really?"
"Well your bed is too big! It's not my fault."
"Well what do you suggest?"
There was no way Kurt was going to suggest sharing the bed, yes he wanted it but it had to be her choice. Jane looked at him then away again quickly then back again.
"You could…if you wanted to…because you have a bad back…and I'm only thinking of you…but you could share the bed with me…if you want?"
If Kurt thought he saw Jane blush a few seconds before it was nothing to how red her face and neck was now.
"Jane…are you sure? I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable in any way."
"Weller, I…I know that even though we…care about each other…it doesn't mean we're like a normal…couple…"
Kurt looked at her in confusion until he worked out what she was trying to say.
"Ok, Jane, I'm going to say this as many times as you need me to and probably more than that. Yes we care about each other but more importantly…"
Jane snapped her eyes back to his.
"…we love each other. And just to be clear. I want you in every way both emotionally and physically. The only thing that is stopping me from showing you how much I love you is the fact that you were in the hospital until yesterday, actually there are two things, the second is the fact that I want to prove to you, before we take anything further, that I do in fact love you. When we do make love I don't want you to have any doubts about how I feel about you. Plus you need your strength, it'll take all night!"
Jane rolled her eyes at the last part due to the words and the fact that Kurt was wiggling his eyebrows. She picked up a cushion and threw it at him.
"Oh, I didn't realise that the definition of 10 minutes was now 'all night', good to know."
"Ouch. That was a little harsh. You'll be apologising to me afterwards."
"Yeah, yeah."
Later that night they did share the bed, each stuck to their side but they did face each other.
"Goodnight Jane." Whispered Kurt
"Goodnight Weller." Jane whispered back
Kurt knew food was an issue for Jane so instead of plating up her food he left everything family style in bowls on the table so she could help herself to however much she wanted and when she finished her serving she had the option of taking more. This seemed to work well. Kurt also gave her a medium sized container of homemade trail mix that she could munch on if she ever felt a little peckish. Her appetite did improve but like anything else it was a work in progress. The only thing that he didn't take slowly was PDAs. He didn't want her to doubt his feelings for her so whenever possible he would hold her hand, well her fingers to start off with. He started with hooking one of his fingers to one of hers when they were watching TV or when they were walking or just next to each other, each time he caught her looking at their joined fingers then to his face then back to their fingers and face again then away with a smile and blush on her face. She got so used to it that it was Jane that made the bold move when he next hooked his fingers to hers to take his whole hand instead, it was his turn to look at their joined hands then at her face and he looked away with a wide smile on his face. When they arrived at work he would take her hand and soon as they were both out of the SUV all the way to their floor, from the car park into the elevator to their floor, it didn't matter who they ran into Kurt kept her hand in his. The first time he did this, her first day back at the office, she was shocked, at his apartment or anywhere away from the office she could understand but at work she assumed he would want to keep their relationship quiet, as in pretend there is no relationship when at work but she was mistaken. When they met other agents on the way to the elevator pleasantries were exchanged even though Jane tried to disengage her hand from his but his grip was strong and he didn't seem to mind who saw them together. The same thing happened in the elevator. When they got to their floor he would still have a hold of her hand and they would step out still holding her hands regardless of who could see. In fact she was pretty sure that he deliberately stepped to the side of the elevator so everyone could see them holding hands and then he kissed her temple which left her completely speechless and red in the face. He left her with a 'see you later'. She didn't know how long she stood there for but she watched him as he walked to his office then next thing she knew Zapata and Patterson were standing right in front of her wearing maniacal grins.
"Jane Patterson needs to see us in her lab. Right now!"
"What? No I don't."
A quick elbow from one to the other made Patterson changed her answer.
"Oh er yeah, I need you in my lab like asap!"
Jane honestly had no idea what was happening the kiss still left her feeling befuddled. She must have let Zapata and Patterson drag her to the lab because the next thing she knew that's where they were and she watched as Zapata closed the door then with a quick glance at Patterson they both squealed so loudly that it shook her out of her stupor.
"Ok, tell us everything!" demanded Zapata
"Yes, don't you dear leave anything out!"
"What?"
"What do you mean 'what', you need to tell us everything that's happened with you and Weller, we want details. NOW."
"Erm."
"Well we don't need all the details…"
"What are you talking about? Of course we do."
"He's like our brother. I don't want to know those details…"
"Oh please, yes he's like our brother but c'mon. We're talking about Weller, the guy who is always so conservative and never demonstrative just holding hands and kissing Jane. IN. FRONT. OF. EVERYONE. If you don't want any details you know where the door is."
Patterson looked at the door then at Jane and made up her mind.
"Ok I'm in, tell us all Jane."
Jane was embarrassed by this attention.
"Tell you what?"
"Oh c'mon don't be like that, we want details."
"You can go and ask Weller if you want?"
Zapata actually looked like she was debating it but thought better of it.
"Fine, but we're always here if you want to talk about anything or share anything…"
Jane rolled her eyes in response.
They eventually got back to work and Kurt was professional for the rest of the day until they left at the end of the day when he would take her hand and walk to the elevator together regardless of who was still there. At the elevator he would kiss her temple, they had their backs to the office but the heard the squeals on the female members of their team much to Jane's embarrassment.
"See, we're just too cute!"
Jane just rolled her eyes, as they stepped into the elevator and squeezed his hand.
It was the same every day after that, holding hands until they reached their floor then a kiss to the temple and they would be professionals until the end of the day and another kiss to the temple as they made their way to the elevator. They remained professionals even when they were in the field although if things went sideways and one of them was hurt then professional standards went out of the window.
The physical side of their relationship took a while as well but it was worth it. They continued to share his bed and each stuck to their own side. Kurt wouldn't do anymore then kiss her temple when they were in the bedroom. Everywhere else was a different story. For the first day out of the hospital he deliberately restricted himself to a kiss to her cheek or temple. After the first day then he began to include chaste kisses to her mouth. She seemed to be shocked at first but she became accustomed to them and eventually started to initiate them. He didn't take it any further as he didn't want to put added pressure on her and to be honest he liked taking things slowly, it was frustrating but he also hoped that she would believe him when he told her he loved her. Things changed the day he got shot. They were out in the field and the suspects started to fire their guns and even though he took one out, Jane and Zapata took one each and Reade managed to subdue the last one but not before the suspect shot him, well technically it was a graze but Jane wasn't having any of it. She made sure he got checked out by the paramedics, she actually walked him to them as if she didn't trust him, which granted from past experience he could understand her behaviour but still, Even when the paramedics confirmed it was just a graze she saw fit to question their qualifications and Kurt blushed red from embarrassment, Reade and Zapata didn't help by grinning. Jane didn't even let him drive them back she held out her hand for the keys and he reluctantly gave them to her. She actually made sure he got in and checked his seatbelt for him before walking around to the driver's side.
"Awww poor Weller has a booboo."
"You should really report the paramedic man." Said Reade
Kurt looked back or tried to then settled on looking in the rear view mirror.
"Why?"
"Well he forgot to give you a lollipop for being such a good boy!"
Zapata couldn't keep her laughter in and Reade looked at Kurt in innocence.
Kurt's answer was to show them his middle finger which started the two off again by which time Jane was behind the wheel.
"What's funny?" asked Jane
"Weller was disappointed that he didn't get a lollipop for being a good boy!" answered Reade, which started the two off again.
"He's probably not even old enough to drive, he probably can't see over the steering wheel." Muttered Jane
Reade and Zapata couldn't keep it in and ended up crying in laughter which earned them a glare from both Jane and Kurt but they didn't care.
When they arrived at his place, really their place, Jane made sure that he sat on the sofa and rested. Eventually Jane sat next to him and she kept on staring at him and looking away. He knew she wanted to say something and didn't want to rush her so he waited and waited. He watched as Jane turned towards him and moved forward and tentatively kissed him as if she was worried that he wouldn't like it. It took him a few seconds to comprehend what was going on and when he did he responded, not as ardently as he would like as he didn't want to frighten her but enough to let her know it was what he wanted as well. When Jane pulled away she reluctantly looked into his eyes and was relieved to see what she wanted to see and she let out a sigh of relief and smiled shyly at him as she moved towards him again. Kurt met her halfway, not that they were that far away from each other. Kurt found it endearing that Jane would blush when their eyes would meet. Jane ended up sitting on his lap just so she could be closer to him; he rested his hands on her thighs while her arms were around his neck. When she pulled away she would bury her face in the side of his neck and sigh.
"Hey, I'm fine."
Jane nodded her head, He would feel it, it would take her a few moments to look at him and he could see the tears welling up in her eyes.
Later on after eating the food that Jane ordered in as she refused to let Kurt cook because he was injured they watched or tried to watch a movie but neither was paying attention to the screen, they were immersed in each other, Jane took up her previous position on Kurt's lap, there was a little kissing but mostly holding, Jane had her arms around his neck while he had his arms around her back, their faces were buried in the other's neck, both breathing in the other. Jane noticed that Kurt was beginning to zone out and thought it was time for them to go to bed. She released her arms and moved or tried to but his arms tightened around her.
"Mmmmm, no!"
"What do you mean no?" asked Jane
Kurt buried his face further into her neck, which she didn't think was possible when he continued.
"Don't move, stay here."
"We're tired, let's go to bed."
"No, I like holding you." Kurt mumbled
"And I like you holding me; c'mon you'll feel better in bed."
He reluctantly let go and Jane was able to move and stand up and she pulled him up and he was still disorientated so she guided him to the bathroom.
"Do you need any help in there?" asked Jane
Kurt shook his head; Jane headed to their room and changed into her sleepwear which consisted of a t-shirt of Kurt's and her panties. When Kurt returned Jane went into the bathroom and he got ready for bed by discarding his trousers and shirt so he was left in his boxers and t-shirt. He must have been half asleep because when Jane came back in and under the covers he pulled her to him and kissed her like they were still on the sofa and when he was finished placed a kiss to her temple.
"'Night Jane." Mumbled Kurt
Jane was much closer to him than usual and the kiss did surprise her only because she knew Kurt was being careful with her in the bedroom. She didn't move away. Kurt was already dead to the world and she fell asleep with a smile on her face.
Kurt woke up a few hours later and realised that his hand was on Jane's stomach, under her t-shirt, she had her back to him and they were spooning sort of then he remembered what he did earlier and cringed, he never wanted to pressure her. He tried to remove his hand slowly without waking her but he failed miserably. Jane raised her head and turned in his direction.
"Hey, do you need your painkillers?"
"No."
"You need the bathroom?"
"No."
"Are you still hungry?" asked an incredulous Jane
She heard him chuckle.
"No."
"Ok, so it's still early even by our crazy standards so why don't we sleep for a little longer?"
"Ok."
He was surprised when he felt her move towards him and she only stopped when her back hit his chest. He tried to move his hand again but she grabbed his and held it against her stomach, he heard her sigh in pleasure and that was all he needed, he relaxed after that and settled back. His head was behind hers and he couldn't resist he sniffed her hair.
"Are you sniffing my hair?"
Kurt froze.
"No?"
"Hey, it's still way too early so can you keep your creepiness to yourself until a reasonable hour where I can kick your ass?"
"Seeing as you asked so nicely…"
"Thanks."
Kurt kissed the back of her head and closed his eyes and felt Jane squeeze his hand.
The next time he woke up, he was on his back, Jane was on her left side snuggled up to his right with her right arm draped over his middle and her head on his chest, this time his right hand was under her t-shirt on the base on her back. He couldn't resist so he kissed her head which caused her to move and look up. She smiled a sleepy smile.
"Morning."
"Morning Jane."
He couldn't tear his gaze away from her, she was totally adorable and even more so when she blushed like she was doing now. Kurt kissed her head again. That was the start of their new 'norm', they would snuggle up during the night, they would kiss each other, a proper kiss then Kurt would place a kiss on her temple and they would settle for the night, his hand would always end up under her t-shirt and by the morning Jane would be draped over his chest, sometimes they would start off spooning others they would face each other but they were always touching.
A few months later the girls had a girls' night, it wasn't their first but it was the first where Patterson and Zapata were tired of being patient.
"So c'mon, we want details!" demanded Zapata
"Huh?" asked Jane
"Details Jane, DETAILS!" clarified Zapata
"What details?" asked a perplexed Jane
They were still on their first round of drinks; Jane noticed the look that the other two shared.
"Ok, you want us to be clear? Ok, Tell. Us. How. Good. Weller. Is. In. The. Bedroom!"
Jane could fell herself blush, she looked to Patterson hoping for an ally but Patterson was resting her chin in her hand waiting with baited breath.
"C'mon, Jane, we're all friends here and we won't tease Kurt. That much." Smirked Patterson
Jane looked down into her barely touched drink. When she looked back up she had two pairs of eyes staring at her.
"Its…its not like that between us…" Jane started
"Oh please!" interrupted Zapata
"Its not, Kurt doesn't want me in that way or think of me like that."
Her two friends looked at each other and then burst into laughter. They were laughing so much they had problems staying in their chairs. Patterson caught the pained look on Jane's face and that sobered her a little. Patterson had to grab Zapata's arm to get her attention, Zapata was still laughing out loud but the force of the hand on her arm was what broke through her senses. She looked to Patterson but found her looking at Jane and when she saw her friend's face she saw the devastation that was on it.
"Jane, what do you mean?" asked Patterson tentatively
Jane just shook her head.
"But you two share a bed, how has nothing happened?" declared Zapata
Jane looked at them and she was barely keeping the tears at bay.
"I told you…he doesn't think of me that way…"
"BULLSHIT!" Zapata stated
"Jane, I agree with Tasha. Kurt is head over heels in love with you. Can you tell us what's happened?"
"Nothing. He doesn't want me that way. At least I have him as a friend that's better than nothing."
"Jane, that's a load of crap!"
Jane shrugged her shoulders.
"Ok, let's try and figure this out, Patterson you like puzzles, so this should be right up your street. Ok, so you two share a bed right?"
Jane nodded.
"At work you still arrive hand in hand, Weller kisses you on the temple and at the end of the day the same. Have you tried …anything else?"
"We've kissed." Admitted a red faced Jane
"Tongues?" Zapata asked
Jane nodded her head.
"What else?"
"That's it. I told you he doesn't feel that way about me. Can we please talk about something else?"
"No!"
"Jane…do you think that Kurt is worried that …you may have flashbacks?"
"Of what?" asked a confused Jane
"When you were in the blacksite, remember we all saw the videos…"
"Why would he be? Nothing …sexual…happened then."
Zapata and Patterson shared another look.
"Yes, but you were naked the whole time…" started Patterson
"and maybe Weller's afraid that it may remind you of that time." Chimed in Zapata
"Jane, Kurt's being careful, not because he doesn't want you but because he wants you. He loves you and if he had to be celibate for the rest of his life to be with you he would, he would never pressure you into doing anything you don't want…"
"Jane, I swear on my life, Kurt wants you!"
"and I swear on my computers!"
There was a hopeful look on Jane's face.
"Do you really think…?"
Patterson and Zapata each grabbed one of Jane's hands and replied in unison.
"Yes, I do."
"Yeah, I do."
"He mentioned something when I initially got out of the hospital but that was it so I assumed he changed his mind."
"Jane, you sleep with him every day."
"I thought he just wanted to be friends."
"So you'd share Reade's bed as well and kiss him like you kiss Kurt?"
"N…no."
"Well then."
"But…why didn't he say something?"
"Ok, let's try it another way. Let's say something traumatic happened to Kurt or he was in your position. Would you be putting pressure on him to become intimate with you?"
"Of course not! It would have to be his choice…oh!"
"Exactly! I think you finally get it."