"Cancer and me"
My leg was hurting pretty bad, I asked Mama to hold me cuz I was feeling sad. She said, "Baby, not now, I have some things to do." So, I sat crying in my room, thinking if only she ever knew.
A few days later it started to swell, I told Mama I didn't feel so well. She rushed to the phone, her face ever pale, leaving me all alone.
As we got in the car and drove away, Mama tried to laugh as she ask about my day, but I knew she was scared, all my feelings of loss were gone once I saw how much she cared.
Mama took my hand as we slowly walked in; she talked to the doctor once the examination was to begin. Clinging to me as if she would never let go, trying to hide the dreadful truth that I was soon to know.
Some days later we got the doctor's call, when we went to his office Mama started to bawl. I said, "Mama, please don't cry!" I was feeling so bad I just wanted to curl up and die.
I dressed in a gown and was brought to a room, the doctor smiled saying I'd be going home real soon, but I stared deep in his eyes, and I saw I wasn't the only one trying desperately to hold back cries.
As days went by I found out what I had, they said it was cancer and I had it real bad. It started with tumors in my lag, spreading to my lungs; this whole thing was a terrible drag.
Days went by before I lost my hair, by now I was so sick I just didn't care. I was feeling so lost, my life was falling apart; I just wanted to be home before the first snowflakes start.
I put on a brave smile every time I saw Mom and Dad, they tried to be cheerful but I could see behind their fake smile they were sad. I prayed, "Jesus, please! You have to help me make it through! If I left them now they just wouldn't know what to do!"
I think he heard my prayer, cuz the next day the doctors had a real smile, saying I should be well enough to spend Christmas at home just for a little while.
A few weeks later as we drove toured home, I snuggled deep in Mama's coat and whispered, "Thank you Jesus, for never leaving me alone…"