Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters or the world they are set in.

"You're not leaving me. I'm leaving you."

I awoke in a cold sweat, tears welling in my eyes. With the back of my hand I swiped them quickly away and took a deep, shuddering breath. I glanced at the clock and frowned seeing that it was still several hours before most witches would be dragging themselves out of bed. Wrapping my arms around myself to fight off the chill that had nothing to do with the cool morning air I climbed out of bed and headed out to the kitchen to start the coffee. There was no way I'd get back to sleep now.

It was only a couple of weeks ago that I woke in the hospital bed, aura intact though still far from whole, after that amazing kiss from Trent. A normal female would be dreaming about that kiss. The surprise of it and of the passion in it. The feel of Trent's amazingly well-kept body pressed up against mine. Not me though. The kiss that I couldn't get out of my head was the one Ivy gave me in San Francisco. That kiss too was surprising and incredibly passionate. I couldn't get out of my head the feeling of my heart breaking at the accompanying speech she gave me. Or the feel of Ivy's hands on my body and the softness of her lips against mine-Trent's lips weren't nearly so soft.

Sure she told me after we'd gotten home that we were good, and neither of us has brought it up again, but I couldn't help the sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I've been tip-toeing around the house these last few weeks, afraid of doing something to make her change her mind and leave me.

With the coffee percolating I set upon the task of mixing up some muffin batter. Ivy's been so great lately, really helpful. And she loves muffins. Well…really she loves just about any baked good, but she seems to love the muffin recipe I got from my mom the most. I want her to know how much I appreciate her, but we both know that I'm pretty much crap at expressing myself with words. Appreciate her…the Turn take it, I can't even honestly express my feelings in my head!

I pause as I notice that my stirring spoon has gotten carried away and I've flung batter onto the floor. Gotta make sure to get that cleaned up before Ivy wakes up. I side-step the mess and begin to spoon batter into the muffin tins.

I love Ivy. I know it. She knows it. I just don't think either of us really knows what kind of love it is. I know that I can't stand the thought of not living with Ivy anymore. I also know that it bothers me to see Ivy and Glen together or to hear Ivy talk about their time together. But does that mean that I love Ivy? I've always been attracted to men—until Ivy. I've never looked at a woman and had my breath taken away—until Ivy. And then there was that kiss and the subsequent dreams….

With the muffins now in the oven I turned back to the coffee. I've got to get at least a couple of cups down in order to at least fake normal today. I take a step forward to reach for a mug and let out a yelp as my foot slips out from under me. I brace my still weak body for the impact with the hard surface of the kitchen floor and am surprised heartbeats later to find myself cradled back against a soft body. Still tensed I crack an eye to see Ivy's concerned eyes looking down at me. I close my eye again and relax my body within Ivy's grasp.

"Rachel?"

At Ivy's soft, questioning tone I sigh and allow Ivy to help me get my feet back under me, leaning on the counter for support. I flash her a quick, sheepish smile before I look down at the skid mark my foot left in the batter on the floor. "Thanks. I'll just clean this up quick." As an afterthought, "I made muffins. They'll be ready in a few minutes."

"I'll get it, Rachel. Go sit down for a moment." She reached to take the wet sponge from my hand and I jerked it away.

"I'm fine, I swear. I just wasn't being careful, as usual." Seeing the frown paired with the hard set to her eyes I sighed and handed over the sponge. "I'm fine." I mumbled as I went to the table and dropped into the chair. Seeing Ivy's eye-roll I realized I was acting like a pouty, petulant child, but the-Turn-take-it, I could clean up my own mess!

Ivy ignored me and crouched to swipe up the remaining batter on the floor. I found myself transfixed, watching her as she went about the simple task. She had just gotten out of bed, so she was still wearing her obscenely short black silk robe. If it had been me in that robe, cleaning that mess, I'd have been flashing my ass all over the room. Ivy managed to make it look elegant. My eyes followed her movements as she rose with the dirty sponge and I watched as each inch of the creamy white skin of her legs was revealed to just above mid-thigh. The woman was all legs and all the more gorgeous for it. I suddenly felt inferior in my plain ol' white sleep shorts and green camisole. As she rinsed out the sponge in the tap she spoke, "The doctor said these spells would most likely last for a month or two while your aura continues to heal. You need to take it easy."

"I have been taking it easy." I twirled Trent's silver bracelet around my wrist, still amazed by it even though I was beginning to view it more as a leash than as a symbol of my freedom from the demons. "I haven't left the house in weeks. No one's been by other than Glen and David those few times. I'm not sure how much easier I'm supposed to take it."

During my rant Ivy had turned around to face me, leaning back against the counter with both hands gripping the edge on either side of her. She just looked at me for a moment before pushing off towards me. I couldn't help but watch the sway of her hips as she glided across the room, but my eyes were drawn to her deep brown one's as she knelt in front of me. She paused briefly with her hand out, looking like she was considering the action, and then lightly stroked her fingers down my arm till they reached the back of my hand. She paused again before softly grasping my hand in hers, her thumb caressing my skin in soothing circles.

This was another thing she'd been doing differently since I woke up in the hospital. She was allowing all the little touches and caresses that most people take for granted, but had been so difficult between Ivy and me before. I'd gotten brave enough our first night back to ask her about it. Apparently while I was still unconscious in the hospital Ivy had been holding my hand a lot. Jenks noticed that my aura looked healthier when she touched me, so she kept doing it. I woke up a week earlier than any of the doctors had expected.

I could see the pity in her eyes, but there was a hint of something else. It was barely discernable, but I knew Ivy well enough to recognize the fear that she couldn't seem to shake. "Dear Heart, you almost died."

Swallowing back the snappish reply on the tip of my tongue I remained silent for a moment. I resisted the urge to thread my fingers through hers and instead balled my hand into a fist as a way of letting out some of the aggression that I was so used to expressing verbally. "Don't you think I know that?" I said softly. "I know how close it was. I had truly believed that I was going to bleed to death lying there on Trent's floor, but…"

"But what, Rachel?"

But what? That was a really good question. One that I didn't know how to answer just yet. Instead, I tried for a small smile and squeezed Ivy's hand. "You know me, I'm not exactly a staying in kinda girl. Cabin fever prone."

Ivy frowned and her eyes reflected a kind of concerned skepticism. Her nostrils flared as she scented my emotions in the air. "That's not what you were going to say."

I shrugged. "Maybe not, but that's all you're getting right now." Part of me was afraid that as soon as I was better, she'd remember that she wanted to leave. I couldn't admit that to her without being able to admit my feelings for her. Coward, thy name is Rachel Morgan.

"Fine." Ivy pulled her hand from mine and rose with more grace than I ever could have managed even on a good day.

I sighed at the hurt look that flashed in her eyes for the briefest of moments. "Ivy, I…"

"I'll get it." Ivy said just as the door bell rang. She'd probably heard whoever it was as they approached the door. She was out of the room before I could even blink. I hated when she did that.

I rose as I heard the soft moan of the heavy front door opening and headed towards my room. Ivy could handle her clients on her own; I know they certainly weren't here to see me. Still, I listened, just in case I was needed.

"Vampiric Charms. How can I help...Mrs. Morgan? Rachel said that you were still in California. Come in."

I will admit that it took me a moment to register the situation. As soon as I did I was sprinting to the entryway. "Mom!"

Note to self: do not run with a still-healing aura. I had to brace myself in the doorway as my aura sluggishly caught up with me. It was a sickening feeling and I had to fight the urge to vomit. I heard both my mother and Ivy simultaneously say my name, though my mother's tone was that of worry, whereas Ivy's was a mix of worry and reproach. Yes, I knew better than to run in this condition.

"I…I'm fine. Just need a second." Finally I felt the last of my aura catch up with my body. It settled itself bringing about one final wave of nausea. After another moment I felt like I could support my own weight once again and pulled away from the doorframe. Ivy didn't seem to agree with my assessment, however, and immediately moved to my side, one arm around my waist and a hand on my hip. I glared. "I'm fine."

"Rachel, what did you do to yourself now?"

It wasn't until I heard Robbie's voice and looked up that I realized there were two more people than I originally had thought. My mom had stepped forward during my dizzy spell and was now touching my forehead, looking into my eyes, and trying to figure out what she could do to help. I met her eyes and smiled softly before looking toward the direction of Robbie's voice. Still standing in the doorway was Robbie and a woman. I'd never seen a picture of Robbie's girlfriend—err, wife—but obviously that was who this was. Her hair was what appeared to be a natural blonde. She was pretty in the girl-next-door kind of way. She wore some makeup to enhance it, but she'd have still been pretty without. She was soft…delicate looking. One look at her and you could tell that she didn't spend any time working out or exercising beyond maybe a treadmill to keep the extra pounds away. She was exactly the kind of woman that I would picture Robbie with. Everything about her was petite, about a whole head shorter than Robbie, narrow waist, slim hips, yet still curvier than me. She had nothing on Ivy though.

At that thought I leaned into Ivy for the briefest of moments and then pulled away completely. I brushed my mother's hand from my forehead once again. She cut off what would have been my snarky reply.

"Robert Morgan. Do not talk to your sister that way. Can't you see she's sick?"

Amazingly it wasn't my brother who responded, it was his wife who was staring intently in my direction and let out a soft gasp. "Your aura….what happened to make it look like that? It's so patchy and thin."

My mother looked at me, worry written across her features. "Were you attacked by another banshee? I thought that had all been taken care of."

"No, I was not attacked by a banshee. That is all over with. This was something else, but it's over with too. Nothing to be worried about." Nothing that I could talk about either. The IS had taken it upon themselves to clean up after my battle with the demon Ku'sox. They'd managed to cover it up so well that the general public didn't even know it had taken place. They blamed a freak gas explosion or some other ridiculous thing like that.

Robbie rolled his eyes. "Nothing to be worried about? Come on, Rachel. What other than a banshee could have stripped your aura away?"

"I don't want to talk about it." I shuddered remembering the feeling of falling through the leylines. "In fact, I'd really rather forget about it altogether."

"Obviously this is another sign that you need to change your way of life." Robbie's tone was condescending and starting to piss me off. I did not want to get into another fight. That would be a great first impression for the wife.

So, I ignored him. Instead, I stepped to his wife and held out my hand. "I'm Rachel and that is Ivy. It's a great to finally meet you."

She nodded in greeting to Ivy and hesitated before taking my hand. Her grasp was light, the shake weak. I gripped her hand more firmly and pumped our hands in a good, solid handshake. She seemed a bit startled, but recovered quickly. "I'm Rebecca. I'm glad to finally get to meet you as well. Robbie has told me a lot about you."

I will admit that I snorted lightly. "Don't let this first meeting affirm any of his opinions of me to you."

She nodded and with a slight smile said, "I'll try not to."

I felt a light touch on my elbow and Ivy was at my side. "Rachel, why don't you take everyone into the sanctuary? I'll get dressed and then get everyone coffee."

I blushed as I realized that Ivy had been standing in front of my family this whole time in her skimpy little robe. "I'm sorry, Ivy. Go ahead and get dressed. I'll get the coffee."

"Or, you could escort everyone into the sanctuary and sit down and I'll get the coffee." The look in her eyes plainly told me that this was not up for debate.

"Sheesh. Fine. I'll go sit some more. I'm so lucky to have you here to tell me what to do. Really."

Ivy smirked and patted my cheek lightly. "I'm glad you think so," she said with a wink before turning and sauntering down the hallway to her room. My eyes were on the movement of her hips until she disappeared into her room. I needed a serious pair of heels to get that kind of sway. It really was a great view, especially in that robe. I will never call that robe ridiculous again.

The clearing of a throat brought my attention back to our guests. "Follow me. The sanctuary is just down the hall."

As we walked Rebecca said, "I'm sorry if we interrupted anything. Robbie said that Ivy was your partner. I just thought he meant business partner."

Her statement took me by surprise and I about tripped over the threshold as I entered the room.

"Becca! What would make you think something like that?" Robbie asked in a loud whisper, taking the attention away from me. Which was good, because I didn't know what to say. It was interesting to see how scandalized he felt with the very idea of Ivy and me as a couple, though.

I took the opportunity to fall back into Ivy's soft, plush chair. Better to formulate a good response from a comfy position. That, and I was still feeling somewhat ill from before. I wanted to ask to ask Rebecca the same question, but for a very different reason. What did she see between Ivy and me that would lead to her make that assumption? Now that I was starting to question the depth of my feelings towards Ivy, did I suddenly have some sort of beacon that shouted, "I'm a lesbian!"? Or maybe there was some new and odd, read lesbian, tint to my aura? Or did she see something in the way Ivy and I were together? I looked back over at my family as they sat down on the couch. Rebecca looked apologetic.

"Rachel, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have assumed anything."

Robbie didn't look so scandalized anymore, no, he now looked puzzled. Probably from my lack of instantaneous denial. Mom was…smiling? What the heck was that about? I decided to just play it cool. Neither affirm nor deny. Until I figured out exactly what it is that I'm feeling I'll need to watch what I say to Ivy as well as my family. "No offense taken," I shrugged, "and don't worry, you didn't interrupt anything."