Madness of a Child in Denial

by anon-acct

Maria wanders corridors at night. And she wonders if she's going mad. Feelings don't change because a clock does, do they? Not for the sane anyway, which means she must not be sane. A look at Maria Robotnik's thoughts when isn't speaking for Shadow.

When she's wandering corridors at night, Maria Robotnik wonders if she's gone mad.

Technically once it hits what they call eleven o'clock here she should be in bed- late for her age but to be fair, she has little to get up to. The curfew isn't exactly enforced, though, so in recent months she's taken to gliding around stone-dead passages in the early hours of the morning, still dressed, listening quietly as the machines hum and gently vibrate below her. Sometimes she hums along with them- low and tuneless vibrato, maybe, or an old lullabye. It soothes her, and the walks help her think. She thinks a lot, at the moment.

Because during the day- the 'day', rather- everything tends to be very simple. Her Grandfather is a busy man who is working very hard on a cure for her, she has a brother called Shadow who has an important job to get ready for and soon- soon, soon, soon, she'll be allowed to Earth and she'll have a wonderful healthy long long life.

But at night she knows a lot more.

Shadow is a weapon and the moment GUN decide it he's getting taken away from her and thrown into every war imaginable. The cure isn't ever going to work, because GUN just wanted Grandfather working for them. In the next few years she will slowly bore herself to death because the ARK is not her home, it's her grave, it always was. She's sure thinking like this makes her mad, though- sane people don't change their thoughts because of a clock, do they? Well, perhaps they were grumpier in the morning, but this wasn't the same at all. It was scary, to think you were going mad.

'I don't want to go among mad people', that was what Alice had said, wasn't it? Maybe nobody wished to go amongst her, then. The adults on board were enchanted with her, true; she was a beacon of hope, the gentle sweet girl so many wanted as their own. And of course there was Shadow. But the other children almost... feared her. Maybe it was her illness, maybe it was her brother. Who knew.

Sometimes, Maria just wonders if the damn corridors have driven her mad, and leaves it at that.