The Heart's Choice
By Misha

Disclaimer- All places and persons mentioned, as well as the circumstances they are in, belong to Tolkien. I'm just a poor student with no money...

Author's Notes- This is just a short Arwen piece inspired by the second movie. It really irritated me how the movie handled Arwen and Aragorn with him telling her to go West and with Elrond laying pressure on them both. So I came up with this. Which is basically Arwen's thoughts on what her father and Aragorn tell her. It's pretty sappy. Oh and though this is movie-based, i have her refer to him as "Estel". It just didn't seem right any other way. Well, that's all, enjoy!

Summery- Arwen's thoughts after both Elrond and Aragorn try and convince her to go to the havens.

Spoilers- Both movies, mainly "The Two Towers", though.

Rating- PG

I am coming from opposition on both sides.

My father tells me it's stupid for me to turn from the havens. Estel tells me to go, that the life that is his is not the life for one such as me.

They are both wrong.

I am not stupid. I am not a child.

I did not make my choice recklessly without thought. I spent many days pondering it.

I thought about all that I would sacrifice. And then I thought about all that I would gain.

It is true that if I go to the Havens nothing will change.

I will forever be as young and beautiful as I am at this moment in time. I will live forever in the company of my family. Of my adored father and brothers, as well as my cherished mother who I have not seen in over five hundred years.

I would not lose the time I had with Estel and I would forever remember the love we had shared.

But that love would be no more than a memory and in time it would fade so that the vibrancy and passion went out of it and it just became a fond reminder of a life that once was.

But if I stayed, that love would have chance to grow even brighter.

I would spend the rest of my days with my beloved. We would marry and have children.

My father says that that's a dream. That Estel will never survive this war.

But my heart tells me otherwise. It tells me that victory will be ours and that Estel will claim his destiny.

I know that our life will not be all joy, that there will be hardships and that the parting will be bitter.

But it is better to endure that pain and bitterness and reap the reward of a lifetime spent together. Of a love that is more than just a cherished memory.

If I go West, then the story of our love ends here, never quite fulfilled.

But if I stay, it will grow and blossom.

Besides, there's the simple fact that I do not wish to live without Estel.

"I would rather live one lifetime with you, then face all the ages of this world alone."

I told him that once and I hold to it.

The idea of living forever in the Havens without him scares me much more than the idea of dying with him.

He has told me to go West, but I know that in his heart he does not mean it. He says it because he believes it is for the best. Because he wishes to protect me.

But I do not need to be protected. Not from myself.

So I will not go West.

Instead I will stay in Lorien until the war is over and then... Then I will go to Gondor to meet my beloved as his Queen.

No matter how hard my father tries to convince me to do otherwise.

As I told him, I have made my choice and I will change my mind. Not now.

I do love him dearly, but as much as it grieves me, I have been forced to make a choice.

A choice between my love for my family and my love for Estel.

And there is not choice.

As much as I will always miss my family, I would miss Estel much more.

And that makes it all so much more simple. My choice has been made and it is the only choice.

It is my heart's choice.

The End