A/N – This story came out of left field. Seriously. There's no rhyme, no reason as to where I even thought of it. I was watching the season finale of Gossip Girl and while I was doing that, I wrote this. It's a little neurotic, Veronica is a little of her rocker, and Logan of course because he's always the calming influence in her life tries to save the day. For whatever reason I can't just sit and write a story from beginning to end, which is why most of what I've posted is one shots, but I am working on a story or five that are longer. I seem to only be able to write when I'm inspired, and that usually means I'll just write little pieces here and there, small bits of conversations that I'll go back and add too, or some times like for this one I can sit and write it in one sitting.
Please enjoy the story, like I said, I have no idea where it came from, or why I imagined it or why it is what it is.
Sighing she stared at the two glass doors that became the barrier between herself in the brightly lit hallway from the registrar's office. The office that held all the wishes and hopes of every student on campus, the most intimidating place in the world for the students that considered themselves, 'undeclared.' The envy of those students who had no idea, no clue as to who they would be when they grew up was like staring at a shower of knives. Painful, and thrilling. The only comfort to those poor lost souls was that once you declared, you could always re-declare. Or declare more than one thing if you were feeling adventurous or confident. But to those who sat silent a mere two steps away, whose choice was merely the top figure on a pyramid, this office was the fire breathing den of dragons. This place scared the crap out of her. This was the day she was officially going to be Veronica Mars, criminology major. Or photography major. Or criminology major or, she shook her head at her thoughts. Maybe she needed a few more minutes, or hours or days, or what the hell, a lifetime.
Letting out a breath, she could feel her fingers tremble, barely holding the piece of paper in her hand she had taken from the nice receptionist two days ago. Two days ago and she still couldn't fill it out, still couldn't stamp out her life. Picturing herself in twenty years, she saw nothing. Not a single thing came to her mind, it wasn't like she hadn't thought about it, if you would have asked her a year ago she would have instantly said the FBI. That was before. Before the summer. Before she dated Piz. Before she ruined her father's second chance at being sheriff. Before she had broken up with Logan and broken her own heart in the process. Before, before, before she realized one morning that she had no clue who the girl standing in the mirror staring back at her was. She was a ghost, she was a nobody.
"Hey."
Lifting her head, she couldn't hide the surprise at finding Logan walking down the hallway towards her, his brow furrowed. "Hey," she replied with a tight smile before directing her stare at the glass doors once again.
"What are you doing?"
Looking at him once again, she gripped the arm rest of the chair, "I can't do it Logan. I thought I could, but I can't. I'm here, I'm two steps away and I can't hand this stupid piece of paper to that very nice receptionist behind those freakin' doors," she gestured wildly towards the doors.
Raising an eyebrow at her, "I can do it for you."
Scoffing at his suggestion she shook her head, "it's not just that. I can't even fill it out."
"What are you worrying about?" He reached for the piece of paper she was waving in the air. "You're declaring your major?"
"Not very well," she pointed out shaking her head slightly her eyes widening. "This is it, this is the rest of my life and I don't know who I want to be."
Snorting he rolled his eyes at her dramatics, "so?"
Waving a finger at him, his head snapped back slightly so he wouldn't get poked in the eye, "you're not helping."
"Did you drink a little extra coffee this morning? Or well, you know, take some drugs?" He suggested trying his best to hide a smirk.
Ignoring him, she took a deep breath, closing her eyes, "okay," nodding curtly, "here I go."
He watched as she sat in place, not moving anywhere, he leaned over, whispering loudly, "did you want me to push you or something?" He laughed softly when she turned her head to glare at him. His laughter and smile dying on his lips at her focused anger, "sorry, not helping."
"Why can't I do this? Why is it a big deal?" Her shoulder drooping as she whined softly looking at him. "People declare their majors all the time. Even change them, why can't I do it?"
Letting out a breath, he leaned back with a smile, "I don't know Veronica. Maybe they're just lucky."
Sighing, she leaned back in her own chair, staring at the door, "what are you doing here?"
"I'm working actually," he spoke quietly trying to gauge her reaction. "For the advising program."
"Well advise me. How the heck do I get this," she waved her paper in his face, "in there?" She shoved her paper towards the door.
"First, you need to calm down," he muttered reaching for her paper, "here, there's this trick one of the workers was using the other day. What do you like doing?"
"I like taking pictures," Veronica answered. His brow creased at her statement, "I mean, I'm fairly good at it, and I don't seem to get myself in trouble all that much when I'm doing it."
Nodding slowly, he took a deep breath, "well, anything else?"
"I don't know," she whined slightly her gaze falling on the glass doors again. Why was this so impossible, why couldn't she just write something down. Why did she have to be that person that had to have a clearly mapped life, a perfectly timed lifetime that wouldn't offer any surprises, not that she really needed one, any more surprises and she figured she'd explode. What she wanted now, was normal, not that kind of normal, but the kind where the biggest worry was wondering which keg party to attend on Saturday night. Nope, she was cursed with the damned fortune of living in Neptune, California, best friend of the late Lilly Kane, ex-girlfriend of Duncan Kane and Logan Echolls. Nope, normal came with a price tag, and it was definitely out of her price range, she didn't even think she could count that high.
"Well, try something completely different, like," he paused pursing his lips while he thought of something. "Anthropology."
Turning her head slowly to look at him, she couldn't resist the pleasure she felt at the thought of strangling Logan in the middle of the hallway, hell she'd gladly skip to prison. "Well, you've been a big help." She smiled, her tongue twisted in sarcasm.
"Hey, wait," he waved his hand at her, "I thought it would be kind of stupid you know, but turns out its actually interesting. I mean, if you think about it, you're basically doing anthropology, observing the world in its natural state. You're not there to change or alter it; you're just there to understand it." He nodded the smile on his face smug. "Not to mention you get to travel around the world."
"Yeah, and does this new found career move pay in diamonds or gold?" She smiled sweetly batting her eyelashes.
Looking at her for a moment, he placed his hands on the chair, "well good luck then," he nodded standing up.
"Wait," she reached out grabbing his arm, "sorry, you're just trying to help and I'm being a brat."
Laughing softly, he sat back down, "too bad they don't pay for that cause you'd be a millionaire." Frowning, she crossed her arms over her chest, a light pout on her face. "You always could be a stripper, I heard that pays good money."
Smiling, she slapped her hands on her thighs, "I take back what I just said, you really do suck at this." She finished with a growl and a glare.
Sighing, Logan leaned back, resting his head against the wall, "you know, it's not like you have to decide right now. Take a couple different classes, I mean, who says you have to be anybody right now?"
"I guess," she breathed leaning forward, resting her arms on her knees, "maybe I can be a bum on the street, you don't have to know who you are for that."
"That's the spirit," he punched her lightly on the shoulder, standing up; "well I'm off to spread my wisdom."
"Yeah, yeah," she grumbled not looking up. Laughing to himself, he took off down the hallway the opposite way he had been going. Taking another step, he whirled around, calling out, "Veronica."
"Yeah," she replied distractedly before looking over at him.
"You should come to the advising center, you never know, might find exactly what you're looking for," Logan grinned with a salute before heading down the hallway.
Watching him leave, the smile appeared on her face, leave it to him to make her think that there was still hope out there for a neurotic 'undeclared' loser, she shook her head with a laugh. Standing up, giving another longing glance at the glass doors she decided the rest of her life could wait another day, who knows, maybe she'd even figure out what she wanted.
A/N – So, I seem to have some big love affair with Veronica and Logan. I just, I don't think we've explored their friendship nearly enough. Veronica gets painted as this cold hearted wench and Logan as this soul baring schmuck, I myself find it hard to believe when someone writes a story that he's crying, but yet Veronica keeps calling him a jackass. There was so much that wasn't explored, so much that we didn't get to know about them, I hope that you've enjoyed this story, maybe it made you laugh or maybe it made you frown. Either way, it was something. Thanks for hearing me, thanks for listening.