A/N: Lina would fireball me for this if she were real.

Disclaimer: I do not own Slayers.

Fairy Cures

Lina finds a book of fairy tales and gets an idea to help Zel.

On Amelia's incidence, the group was now spending three days in Oltar. The small town was known for hot springs and little else, which was fine for relaxing. However, Lina Inverse was not in the mood to relax. She was feeling antsy, which brought her to the local bookstore. Even a small town occasionally had some magic tome or two to purchase and if books failed to hold her interest, she was sure there were a couple bandit gangs around that could help her pocketbook. As she glanced through the books, one book caught her attention. Picking it up, she flipped through it and an idea began to form. Smiling, she closed to the book, paid for it, and headed back to the inn.

Zelgadis knew something was up when Lina walked in with a grin on her face. A shiver went through his body as she laid eyes on him… a bad sign to be sure. The sorceress walked straight toward him without a moment of hesitation and slammed a book down in front of him. The Chimera glanced at the title 'Assorted Fairy Tales'. Fairy Tales?

"What?" Zel asked slightly frightened by what Lina could be planning.

Lina's grin grew. "There are cures in this book."

Color drained from Zelgadis' face. Lina thought there were cures in the children's book and she was determined to try them on him. He should have run when she walked through the door.

"Hey, how about this one?" Lina said as she looked into the book. "Throwing a shape changed person against a wall is said to break the curse."

"Throw?" Gourry instantly picked up the Chimera and launched him across the room and through the inn's wall. Amelia and Gourry had both shown up right after Lina showed the book to Zelgadis and since they did not know any better, they had decided to help Lina try out the cures. Xellos was also there, sipping tea and watching with amusement. Zel would not be surprised if the priest had placed the book right where Lina would find it.

Since Lina came in with the book, Zelgadis had been covered in fish in hope that one would grant wishes, had freezing cold water dumped on him though the reason had never been given, and more things than he cared to remember. Those cures were more or less torture devices and he suspected Lina would not stop until the end of the book. If he ran, he would probably be put on the wrong end of a Dragon Slave.

"Miss Lina, let's try this one," Amelia said pointing to a story in the book. "It says the Prince regained his memory after the female wore these three dresses."

"Okay, you go get the dresses," Lina ordered flipping through the book some more. Zel was slightly thankful the dresses had to be worn by a female. It meant a bit less humiliation for the moment. Gourry helped him get out of the wall and back over to where Lina was reading.

Amelia came back quickly with three dresses. The first had suns printed all over it, the second had moons and the third had stars. The Princess rattled off something about the story saying to use those before holding them out to… him? "Put them on Mister Zelgadis."

"What? The story said some lady wore them!" he snapped looking over at Lina.

"The magic may be amplified if you wear them. That is a very good idea," Xellos remarked from his spot. Zel glared at him.

"Xellos is right. Put them on." Lina said getting up to help Gourry and Amelia.

Gourry tackled Zelgadis to the ground while attempting to pin him. Amelia and Lina took on the task of trying to force him into the dress. Xellos sipped some tea.

The group rolled around for some time before finally succeeding much to Zelgadis' dismay. The bright, yellow dress made Zel look like some new breed of sunflower. The Chimera growled. "Would you guys knock it off?" he snapped thoroughly humiliated. They could have at least forced him somewhere less public, but that was beside the point. He did not want to wear a dress at all.

"But Mister Zelgadis, you look so good," Amelia said clearly trying to make him feel better. Add in that he was wearing a bright yellow dress with suns and fuel gets added. Then, mix in the simple fact that Zelgadis was male and nothing anyone could say would calm him down.

Zelgadis tore off the dress, which was hastily put over his normal clothes. He then shot a fireball at the two remaining dresses keeping the group from even thinking about making him wear them. Lina took the hint and went back to the book. The sorceress took a long time to pick another 'cure,' not because there were none she liked, but because she wanted to give Zel time to calm down a little. He had a habit of taking offense any time they dressed him up.

Zel slowly sat down and readied himself for Lina's next 'cure'. He knew he would not be able to get away. Even if they stopped now, Lina was determined, which meant this would go on until she was satisfied. He was better off getting it done all at once than letting it drag out.

"Here's one," Lina said after sometime. "The tears of a maiden healing lost sight."

"Tears?" Amelia said missing the glint in Lina's eye.

Lina set the book down and pulled out an onion. Where the onion came from was a mystery, but one might suspect the grinning priest in the corner.

The fiery sorceress grabbed Amelia with one arm. "A shrine maiden should do nicely."

Amelia swallowed. "But that will hurt!" she whined trying to get away.

"Only for a moment and then you can wash it out," Lina replied before shoving the onion in her eye. The power of the onion was so over powering that it made Amelia start to bawl. A rain cloud of tears covered Zel before Amelia ran off to get the onion smell away. Clearly, this 'cure' did not work, but Zel was glad someone else took the brunt of Lina's plan even if it was Amelia.

"Aren't these stories supposed to be based on some kind of truth?" Lina complained looking around for the book. She thought she had set it on the table, but it was not there.

"The characters are probably the real part," Zelgadis replied secretly hoping the book would not come back. Gourry seemed to have gone missing as well. The book might have gone with him.

Lina put her hands behind her head. "You may be right."

"Why don't you try this one, Lina?" Xellos said appearing in front of her with the book open. "The power of a kiss may break the spell."

"Are you suggesting…" Lina could not finish her sentence.

"You kiss Zelgadis."

Lina's face turned bright red at the suggestion and immediately she reached for the book. "Let me see that," she ordered, but Xellos kept just out of reach.

Zelgadis watched as Lina chased Xellos around the crowded eating area. He could tell that Xellos was at his usual games again, though he would have to admit to blushing at the suggestion as well, but only slightly. Rather than getting involved, Zel just remained in his chair. Lina would probably give up the chase soon and start throwing fireballs anyway.

"Come now, Lina, it's not that bad," Xellos said appearing in front of Zelgadis.

"Just give me that book!" Lina yelled diving at Xellos. Xellos grinned as he teleported a safe distance away.

Those that know Xellos should also know a little about the workings of his mind. Lina typically fell into that category. This was one of those times when she did not. Even Zel was caught by surprise as Lina dove at him.

Time seemed to slow as both Lina and Zelgadis realized what Xellos was doing, but of course, it was too late. Lina's face collided with Zelgadis' face. Lips touching lips for mere moments before the chair fell backwards knocking them apart.

A chance would have it, Amelia and Gourry walked back into the room. Based on the fact that they were together, a safe assumption was that Gourry had been helping Amelia with the onion. Both looked at their friends lying on the ground. Lina was basically on top of Zelgadis even though they were no longer kissing.

"Miss Lina, Mister Zelgadis, are you all right? Your faces are so red," Amelia remarked having no idea what was going on. An explosion soon followed.

The End