At first it may seem like it, but this will not be a series revolving around Fai and Kurogane. Instead, it will be a sentient object fic of sort, in which I personify Ginryuu (Kurogane's sword) and Suzaku (Fai's tattoo). (Suzaku was a name Tiffany Koi/Badluck Koi came up with for the tattoo). So while there will be mentions of the men, the focus will be on Ginryuu and Suzaku.
I was inspired by a scene in Chapter 131 of xxxHolic where Yuuko explained that Watanuki and Doumeki were both changing. Interestingly she was also looking at Ginryuu and the tattoo as she said that. It's my personal belief that CLAMP intentionally drew it to reflect that Fai and Kurogane had also changed dramatically in their journey, and suddenly the idea of writing from their items' point of view popped in my head. Originally this was supposed to be a stand alone one-shot, but once I started writing and talking about it with friends, other things came up - which are explained at the note at the bottom.
Rating: PG
Spoilers: Both Fai and Kurogane's past
Summary: There's a reason they were sacrificed in order to have wishes granted. Together, a sword and a tattoo discuss why they feel they were let go, and what it entails for their respective owners.
I. To Let Us Go
There are tales of a wondrous shop that can grant your wish, any wish.
Well, most wishes.
But with every wish there is a consequence. Or to be more precise, a price. That is how the shop operates.
The price is usually not money. The price can be anything important the customer possesses. And the price does not even have to be a tangible object. It can be an abstract concept such as love. The catch is that the price must be of equal weight of the customer's wish. Nothing more. Nothing less. Equilibrium is essential in maintaining the order of the universe. To have an unequal exchange will cause harm. Therefore, the heavier the wish is, the heavier the price that has to be paid at the expense of the wish is. When it comes to that point, the price is often something the customer considers highly precious. Why such possessions are considered the most precious varies and why they are considered precious may reveal a lot about their owners' nature.
The tales tell the truth. Such a shop and its shopkeeper with her practices do exist. How can you know it's ascertained?
Because we are the possessions of two people who have made their wishes be known to the shopkeeper. And as a result, we have been removed from them despite their protests and hesitations. We are no longer in their hands or their back. We are now being transported to the treasure room where all sorts of possessions are kept by the shopkeeper, because she says one never knows if they will come in handy.
One of us is a well-crafted katana with an intricate silver dragon as its hilt – hence the name Ginryuu – that formerly belonged to Kurogane, a ninja of Shirasagi in the land of Nihon.
The other of us is a magical seal designed as a tattoo in the shape of a phoenix that formerly belonged on the back of Fai D. Flourite, a mage of Luval in the land of Celes.
And even though our owners are not happy parting with us and the ninja has sworn he will come back to fetch one of us, we know that there is no guarantee we will be returned. Because once a wish is granted and the optimum price is paid there is no going back. To let us go may very well mean for eternity. And now that our owners are pit together in a long journey to come, we too are fittingly placed together in the treasure room.
Unlike our owners at the time they first met each other, we are perfectly content with each other's company. We cannot move. We cannot serve our purposes anymore. To put it quite simply, we can only tell each other about our owners. What they are like. What their strengths, their weaknesses are. But most importantly, why we are their most precious possessions and, as a result, the uncertainties of the future that they will have to face without us the moment they had to let us go.
As instructed by the shopkeeper, the assistant with the short pink hair places the tattoo against a mantelpiece that is designed to store magical enmities. It quietly leans against the support the special mantelpiece offers. Even though it is comfortable, the tattoo had to admit, it is not the same as its owner's back. Fai's slender yet strong back had curves and contours that accentuated his own renowned beauty as the blue-eyed wonder who was extraordinarily gifted in wizardry. Yet as much physical prowess and dexterity the mage surprisingly possessed, the tip of its "wings" would always feel confined nearly as much as it served as a confinement tool of sorts for Fai. The assistant finally let go of the tattoo seal and steps back to let her fellow companion with blue pigtails prop the other prize next to the phoenix mark to finally let it take a good look.
There is something impressive about the sword. Even with its blade sheathed properly in the dark hued scabbard, the hilt is something to behold. Carved in the shape of a dragon's head, its scales are silver and its beady eyes garnet red. Although there are faint signs of weariness from being used in battle, the polish is still there as it glints from the angle of the dim light of the shop room. To sum it up, the stranger's sword looks quite fearsome. After all, dragons in Celesian culture are something to be afraid of and are regarded as dangerous and fiery creatures that retaliate in unmerciful ways if their precious treasures were threatened in any way. And yet, there seems to be more than meets the eye of this valuable weapon, and the tattoo can feel a strong, yet unusual, aura coming from it.
"Maru! Moro!" the shopkeeper calls out. "Come join us. Watanuki made a fabulous meal."
"Coming Mistress!
"Mistress, we're coming!"
The lights are shut off as soon as the mysterious assistants patter out of the room, leaving the tattoo and its new companion to their own devices in the silence and darkness, saved for the humming noise coming from the magical mantelpiece and the glowing ember eyes of the serpentine sword. There must have been other artifacts and curios that would and could come to life when left alone, but alas no such signs of other consciousness are teeming in the room. Not having much to do, the marking remains leaning in its position, simply resigned to its new location for perhaps eternity.
"So what are you exactly?"
Ah, so the sword did have an entity to speak. Fancy the tattoo could now have something to keep its mind off of loneliness.
"Ah, you knew I can speak too?"
"Of course!" the sword barks, revealing that it actually has a temper to match its design and its owner. Surprisingly it did not startle the tattoo. "You're a host of magical entity too from a powerful spell caster."
The phoenix is already amused. "Well then, silver dragon, I'd guess you answered your question yourself."
"It's Ginryuu," Ginryuu huffs in exasperation. The tattoo doesn't feel like pointing out that the dragon's given name – whose character was also carved in the hilt – literally meant "silver dragon" and that therefore it still technically addressed the weapon correctly. "And no, that's not what I meant. What's your purpose, Suzaku?"
"Suzaku?" the phoenix says back, completely thrown off (not literally of course, otherwise it would be doomed lying flat on the ground and couldn't do much to get back up). "What did you just call me?"
"What, are you saying don't have a name in the first place?"
"Well…I…" The aura within it wavers in a faster pace from the shock, as well as the thought that Ginryuu feels…pity for it not really having an honorable name like the sword. "It's just that what I am doesn't really get a name at all often. But uh…I could go with that."
"Damn right you will," Ginryuu says hotly, once again revealing just what a tongue it has. "Make it easier to talk, too." There is even a flicker coming from its eyes, as if it was serious on making Suzaku (oh, it will take time to get used to a name!) feel as if they were equals. "And what do you mean something like you don't get a name usually?"
Ah…well there's no hiding from the hot-headed sword about why it was created in the first place. Fortunately it's okay for Suzaku to tell Ginryuu its purpose and connections with its owner Fai now that it's no longer was in service to its owner. "It's rather complicated," Suzaku says.
Ginryuu growls with as much of a dragon imitation it can. "My story is complicated too," it says. "So try me."
"Fine then, Ginryuu." Suzaku is quiet for a bit as it goes back to the faint memories of its creator summoning together the energy to create it.
"I'm a seal that stops my owner's magical power from increasing." It then waits to hear what Ginryuu has to say about that. Alas, this is only the beginning of the complex relationship Fai has with it, not to mention the relationship between Fai and the man responsible for its creation.
"Okay…but why would your master see the inhibition of his magic as something very, very valuable?" Ginryuu says, but then throws in, "uh…not that I'm saying you're something useless."
"I still take that as a huge offense!" Suzaku declares. But when Ginryuu scowls, it goes "Kidding, kidding!"
It then sighs. "At first when I was newly created and placed on my owner's back, I didn't know what he was like at all. He was young, and at first it seemed that I was a gift of sorts from my creator to him. I could, however, tell that my creator is someone very important to my owner."
"So your master regards you as his most precious possession because you're a gift from his precious person?" Ginryuu asks. Suzaku then picks up how the sword speaks and what words it uses. Already, it can feel the sage that characterizes its new companion.
"Not quite…if I'm not wrong. This is where it gets complicated." Ginryuu doesn't say anything, so Suzaku continues. "I think that's it, too, but there's a dark story to my owner. I don't know all of it, but sometimes when he's at his most vulnerable his thoughts leak into mine and I latch onto it. And it's honestly disturbing, if you will." At this point, Suzaku's aura ripples for a bit, as if it is shuddering from the memories of discovering the deepest and darkest thoughts of Fai.
"How so?"
"Well…" Suzaku is at least reassured that by him talking about all of this that it still won't jeopardize either his owner or his creator. "He often thought about how it's his own fault for terrible things that happened to him – he and his magic. Things like 'it only causes misfortune' and 'I can't even use healing magic to atone for my actions.'"
"So your master thinks that with you tampering with his powers nothing can go wrong," Ginryuu says.
"Yes," the tattoo affirms. "Even still, my owner was hesitant to use his magic, but eventually he started to believe that perhaps he can use his magic for the good and that it won't cause anything bad. Until my creator's insanity and the true reason he created me for my owner was finally revealed."
Suzaku can still remember the shock, pain, and everything Fai was going through, and the registering of that still ran in its aura.
"That all happened today."
"What happened?"
"Long story short, the reason my creator wanted my owner's magic capabilities to be controlled is that so in the end my owner will kill my creator, the person he feels so indebted to."
"What?" the sword unexpectedly roars. Amazingly the nearby loose-leaf books flap from its outburst. "That's…that's…"
"Completely awful and horrible," Suzaku finishes.
"Master…if Master hears about this, I know he will be furious of such betrayal and atrocity!"
"But is it simply betrayal?" the phoenix marking ponders. "My owner – yes, he's aware of it…but it's still complicated."
"But why?" Ginryuu says, and if it can move it would be writhing violently by now. "Why would your creator do this to your master?"
Suzaku sighs. "I wish I knew…and I don't know if my owner will ever know. Doesn't make sense…but regardless he couldn't kill my creator. When he took himself to this world, he seemed rather cheerful. But I could feel that he was crying. Something to do about 'can't do this. Not to the first person who showed me and him kindness.' So in the end, I guess I'm his most valuable possession because for whatever reason my creator wanted to be murdered, my owner still feels indebted to him through what he tried to do to help my owner with me as the seal. Heck…even I can't make any sense of it. So you see what I mean by complicated?"
"Yeah."
The room is then met with silence as the two fathom over the circumstances Fai had been pit with before he chose to run away from everything. Ginryuu knows that the tattoo isn't capable of piecing together everything its master had felt in regards to having his magical power sealed just so in the end he would have to kill his savior. Yes, by all means Suzaku's tale and what its purpose is was in fact complicated and harrowing, but Ginryuu knows that his own tale and everything his master feels about it can be just as despairing.
"So what about you, Ginryuu?" Suzaku says, ending the silent moment at last, even startling the sword.
"What now?"
"Your story. You know, how you and your owner got here and why you were turned in. You said it's complicated too. I think I said enough on the matter of my owner and my creator, so now's your turn."
"Oh." Granted, there isn't betrayal or something startling coming from the person its master has sworn oath and allegiance to (at least, it hope not), but Ginryuu is very aware of its creation as well.
"Actually, I'm a copy of the original Ginryuu," it informs Suzaku. Still, the serpentine sword is a perfect replica of the original. The same materials (silver scales for Suwa's prized metal, golden head for good fortune in battle, and garnet eyes for fury and passion) were used and forged by the finest swordsmith in the capital so that it had the same weight, feel, and precision of the original ancient one.
To its horror, Suzaku laughs, the nerves. "A copy?" it teases. "How did your owner end up with the copy? What happened to your original?"
"It's not funny," Ginryuu hisses, anger flaring. "Don't you dare insult Master. The original of me is buried with Master's mother because Master's father has no body left."
That certainly shuts up the tattoo, and the sword can even feel the aura surrounding it change temperature as it reacts in horror to the realization of the extent its Master has gone through. "Your owner lost his family, too?"
"Unfortunately, yes," it says, solemnly. "Although I was created long after the original Ginryuu was taken away at Master's request, the blessings bestowed on me from his master had unintentionally created a connection between me and the original. So I know what happened to Master. Master lost his parents, his homeland, everything, except for the original Ginryuu. That's why I'm precious, because although I may be a copy, I am a copy of the only possession he has left from his family and home."
Suzaku's about to say something again, but Ginryuu refuses to be interrupted. Maybe it's because it's been a while since it hasn't been used continuously by Kurogane, who'd always somehow found something to be sliced at, or maybe because talking about its master made it realize just how painful it's feeling, but suddenly it just needs to keep on going.
"You may not see it now since my blade is clean, but I have been tainted with so many bloods of allies and enemies alike that Master had pushed me through, sliced, and stabbed. Every time I am rammed or sliced across somebody, I can feel his triumph, one that proves he's strong enough. But that's not it because at the same time, I can still feel his pain. His pain of not being able to protect his mother. His pain of losing his father, who had left behind the sword I'm merely a copy of. And his anger and hunger and mad desire to be stronger than he's capable of."
Oh, if only it could be withdrawn now. Something along the blur of anger and despair is welling up in its aura. But now as it keeps going on, it realizes something about its Master, and it actually hurts.
"When only… he's trying so hard to protect people he is sworn to. Somewhere along the way he begun to think that spilling blood is the surest way he won't ever lose people he loves again like that tragic night."
Is it just Ginryuu, or is it hearing sobbing noises coming from Suzaku? "Oi! I know it's sad and all, but don't cry."
"Can't help it," the tattoo says, pausing to take a breath. "Your owner, my owner…They just have so much in common. Losing loved ones, being pit in tragic and difficult circumstances and having to leave home. And now they are off on their own without us to serve them. I mean…sure it's easier for us to be parted from them, I guess, then for them to let us go, but still…I just…can't."
"Yes, yes, I understand," Ginryuu tries to reassure Suzaku. It doesn't even realize just how much this whole separation is affecting it until now as they rail on about their respective masters and just realize how much pain the ninja and the mage had been harboring.
The tattoo sniffles. "I mean. What if my owner needs to use magic? Will he without me? Dear me, what if he needs to use it but refuses to what with his mentality even if he's in danger?"
As much as Suzaku can be erratic, Ginryuu doesn't want to see it sad at all. It then resolves that it will be strong for both of their sake in spite of their masters' uncertainties. "Listen, I, uh, know it's hard. And as much as I worry what will happen to Master if he doesn't have me to help him in fights, there's really not much we could do."
"Yeah," the phoenix hiccups, "you're right. After all, maybe something good will happen, you never know. I mean, hey, no offense, your owner appears to be really heartless" – Ginryuu interrupts with a snarl – "I said no offense! But, uh, if what you say about him being the protective type and all is true – and I trust you – then maybe my owner will be in good hands. I mean, hey, I can wish and hope, right?"
"Right," Ginryuu says in earnest, suddenly feeling more hopeful as well from Suzaku's train of thoughts. "And maybe Master will heal too. Maybe he'll stop shedding blood as much like his master wants, the reason we were sent away in the first place. Even if it means ever since I was provided to him I had been nothing but a bloody weapon, literally, I'll stay like this here, unused."
Yes, it's hard for it to think that it has been effectively rendered useless stored away in this dark room in the first place, but it will be strong for its master's sake as well.
Suzaku sighs. "I guess we're feeling like this because while we are so attached to our owners, my creator and the one who blessed you had also poured in us their innermost wishes for your owner and my owner. Even though my creator intended to have my owner kill him and the one who blessed you purposefully sent your owner away from home, it seems they want our owners to be happy. Does that make any sense, Ginryuu?"
As painful as their conversation turned into, the tattoo had a remarkable point. "Yeah, I get it." This is it, it thought. Although Kurogane had sworn he'll be back to reclaim Ginryuu, it doesn't know whether to keep its hope on it. For now, it will resign to its fate here along with Suzaku.
"So…I guess for now they'll be on their own. To let us go was hard for both of them, but maybe it's for the best."
"Even though they got off to a rough start," Suzaku reflected, for of course the moment Fai and Kurogane had said one word or given one exchange with each other, there were clashes, "they're stuck together just like how we're stuck with each other."
It's strange how they both reach the same conclusion, without much argument or even many lamentations. Then again, it's their masters who actually need the journey and separation more than them.
"Hey, Ginryuu?"
"Yeah?"
"I…" Is it just Ginryuu, or is Suzaku's aura wavering frantically again. "I'm glad I'm with you."
Yes, it is, the sword realizes, just as much as it feels its aura pulsing rapidly as well. Okay, it takes back those words. Maybe they do need support just as much. Who knew that a sword and a marking could be touched and have feelings too?
"Yeah, you too, Suzaku."
Note: So, as you can see, a deep friendship will bud between Ginryuu and Suzaku. 'Cause after all it makes sense that, if Fai and Kurogane becomes close with everyone in the main gang, then so will the sword and the tattoo be with each other. Which is why out of the blue I feel like developing them more to the point there will be a strong connection - ala soulmates - for them. I understand the concept might be strange, but this will not be crack at all. So yes, there will be more installments, and I already have several planned out.