A/N: So I've been having a couple crappy days recently in more ways than one. Life just about sucks for me right now and the block is killing me. I've done this to try and smash up some walls with something other than my fists... well... 'cos they hurt like a bitch at the mo.

Song is Citizen Soldier by 3 Doors Down. I like a little mellow music once in a while. It's not mine and neither are the boys or their mom. *grumbles* Title is the same.

It's a little dark maybe, and hopefully a little sweet as Dean looks after Sam the only way he can. Oh and AU 'cos Dean's dead. Just for this one. Just tryin' to bust some block people so please enjoy... and maybe review for me. Let me know I broke down the walls.

Citizen Soldier

Beyond the boundaries of your city's lights,
Stand the heroes waiting for your cries.
So many times you did not bring this on yourself,
When that moment finally comes,
I'll be there to help.

Sam steps out of the darkness of the alleyway to stand under the yellow light of the streetlamp. The demon flinches and looks at the soldier who faces him down. Sam's hand shoots up as the demon writhes, feeling itself being pulled from the body it's riding hard. Black smoke pours from the mouth and nose of the man as the child cowers behind the form of the man who was hurting her. Finally all of the smoke clears the man's feet and he slumps to the pavement, gasping for breath, tears streaming down his face. Sam steps up to him and kneels down.

The man looks at him with fear in his eyes.

"Are you alright?" Sam asks, ignoring the pain sparking behind his eyes.

"Lacey, I was hurting my baby girl and I- I couldn't stop. Thank you. Thank you for making me stop."

"Daddy?" The little girl whimpers from behind her father. Sam's attention shifts and he stands as the little sandy haired girl comes in to the light of the lamp and climbs into her father's lap as he opens his arms.

"Oh baby. I'm so sorry." The man whispers and holds his daughter gently, close to his heart as Sam walks back into the darkness.

On that day when you need your brothers and sisters to care,
I'll be right here.
Citizen soldiers holding the light for the ones that we guide from the dark of despair.
Standing on guard for the ones that we sheltered,
We'll always be ready because we will always be there.

Sam stumbles into the rundown abandoned house he's been staying in at the outskirts of town. He catches himself against the wall as his vision tunnels to a pinprick of light as a starburst shines behind his eyes. "Oh god." He whispers as he slumps to the mattress on the floor that's been serving as his bed. More like his place to collapse when the pain and exhaustion of what he's doing rears its ugly head and overpowers him.

"I'm not god, but I'm here." She says as she steps out of the darkness and eases onto the ratty mattress, pulling his head gently into her lap.

"I don't know how to fight like this. Alone. I need Dean." Sam whispers, allowing the darkness to claim him as he feels her hands on his hair, gently working through the sweaty tangles. He imagines they're his brother's hands and he finds the strength to survive the pain and he finds the comfort he needs to rest.

When there are people crying in the streets,
When they're starving for a meal to eat,
When they simply need a place to make their beds,
Right here underneath my wing,
You can rest your head.

"Hey ya Sammy."

Sam stands staring at the source of the voice. He swallows hard, his hands shaking.

"D-dean?"

"Yeah Sammy. 's me."

"Oh God. Oh God." Sam breathes as he leans towards his brother and the form in front of him wavers like smoke.

"Ya needed me. I'm here."

"No. Not like this. I need you back Dean." Sam stifles a sob as his blue green eyes fill with tears.

"Hey, I'm here." Dean says softly. "It's the only way I can be here Sammy. I'm sorry for that, but I AM HERE."

Sam falls to the mattress on the floor and Dean eases onto it. "Close your eyes Sammy."

The red rimmed lids blink and finally close over too bright blue green. Sam feels a hand moving gently through his tangled locks. He breathes a sigh and he knows he has his brother back. The only way he can. He'll fight again, the only way he knows how.


On that day when you need your brothers and sisters to care,
I'll be right here!
Citizen soldiers holding the light for the ones that we guide from the dark of despair.
Standing on guard for the ones that we sheltered,
We'll always be ready because we will always be there...


There... there... there...

Sam fights as he knows how, a glinting blade aiding him in his struggle. The demons fall at his feet, red light sparking through the bodies from the wounds. More swarm from the darkness as sounds reach Sam's ears.

"Sammy, watch your back!" Dean cries as he watches from afar. Anger surges through him as he watches Sam get taken hard to the ground. A light behind Dean casts the scene in front of him into shadow and he turns to the light, fury on his features as his green eyes spark. Time stops in the scene behind him.

"I know what you're thinking." A soft voice greets Dean as a shadow emerges from the golden light, the sun framing her blonde waves.

"I gotta help him! They're gonna kill him!"

"Dean, baby. It's not your fight anymore."

"No mom. I can't just stand by and let him die!"

She pulled him to her chest, her green eyes filling slightly. "I know you want to go back, but you can't. Sammy has to fight this on his own. Sammy has to fight to live." She pulled back and tipped his head to the scene in front of them. "Watch."

Time speeds up once more in the scene they watch and Dean sees Sam throw the demons off him with a mighty shove. Sam forces himself to his feet and grips the blade in his hand tight, sending red light arcing through the demons around him. Finally the ground around the hunter is littered with bodies. Sam draws a ragged breath which is released on a groan and slides to his knees as pain assaults him. "Dean." Sam whispers as he topples to the pavement.

"Gotta go to him mom." Dean whispers, tears blurring his sight of Sam.

"I know baby, I'll be here when you get back." Dean steps into the alleyway away from his mother and goes to his little brother's side. He eased onto his knees beside his fallen brother. His hand reaches out and cards through Sam's hair, the tangled locks easing back from Sam's closed eyes.

Sam wakes the next morning in the house he's been staying in. He wakes to fading bruises and the smell of leather in the room.

Hope and pray that you'll never need me,
But rest assured I will not let you down.
I'll walk beside you but you may not see me,
The strongest among you may not wear a crown.

On that day when you need your brothers and sisters to care,
I'll be right here!
On that day when you don't have the strength for the burden you bear,
I'll be right here!
Citizen soldiers holding the light for the ones that we guide from the dark of despair.
(Citizen soldiers)
Standing on guard for the ones that we sheltered,
We'll always be ready because we will always be there.

He fights as he knows how. Walking out of the darkness to stand under the light of the streetlamp. The light glints off the blade in his hands and the determination in his eyes. He hears the voices that he needs to hear and realizes that he'll survive another night with his brother by his side.

"I've got your back Sammy."

"I'm so proud of you baby."

Thanks for reading.