A/N: I've been meaning to write my version of the 'Alicia leaving LG' storyline for months, but my muse only cooperated a day before the promo came out. Part one was already written by then and you can see from the word count that it's insanely long. So I didn't want to let it go to waste, but I decided to adjust the second part to the promo and some spoilers I've read. There will also be a third part and I plan to post all of it before the season 5 premier.
I haven't written Alicia in forever, so this was an experiment on that front. I thank Josie and Sab for their second opinion, who made sure I did her justice.
It's also my first attempt to write in first person and I have to admit I enjoyed it very much. I'm using Diane's pov throughout the whole fic.
I left Cary out of this story, because I already wrote an OS with Diane and him about his leaving before the season 4 finale, you can find it among my fics, if you are interested. But Kalinda is in the second part, I just couldn't tag another character.
The first part features Diane's best friend, who was mentioned in s4, and I've been meaning to include her in a fic for a while. I hope you'll like her.
Enjoy reading and please let me know what you think.
Special thanks to shelovesshoes for all her help! 3
It's just another gala. I say to myself and shake my head at myself in the mirror. I have attended dozens of these events throughout my career, nevertheless this time I spent a whole afternoon searching for a dress in my favorite stores, until I finally found the one I'm wearing now.
I usually try to choose neutral colors, to fit in with the crowd, I'm not the belle of the ball anymore and I'm mainly there as an obligation. Not to mention I usually go alone, there's no need to be the target of questions about my plus one, but truth be told there's rarely someone I actually want to go to these events with.
But this time everything is different, because I am expected to appear with my plus one tonight. Whether I like it or not, our relationship is a conversational topic, especially since we made it official. It was a necessary decision because of the offer of the judgeship, but for once I don't mind that people know about the man in my life.
I take pleasure in looking at the sparkling diamond on my ring finger that he surprised me with after we'd decided to get married, even though I was reluctant to wear it publicly at first. But it symbolizes the promise we made, that we will stop running away from each other and give this relationship a real chance and it's making both of us happy.
"Diane?"
I hear Kurt's voice from downstairs, where he's been waiting patiently up until now. I take a look at my white gold watch and realize we need to leave soon if we don't want to be more than fashionably late.
"I'm coming," I shout and take a last look at my reflection through the glass.
The fully lined, red, jersey fabric evening gown has a split to its skirt, but that's not the only part making it elegantly sexy. It has a pleated bodice with a keyhole detail and a cut out back with a train. The embellished waistband and straps add a dramatic sparkle to the formal wear. The diamond earrings, my make-up and my hairstyle make the picture actually perfect and I'm already looking forward to walking down the stairs and experience his reaction.
The size of my closet clearly shows that I take joy in dressing up just for myself, but doing it for someone else feels so much better. I love seeing his appreciation whenever I put on something a little more daring, the way he looks me up and down with those dark brown eyes of his, sometimes almost undressing me with his gaze, makes it worth all the effort.
"I'm sorry, I lost track of time," I say as I start walking down the stairs in my red heels and the matching red clutch under my arm, holding my skirt up not to step on it and my eyes are shifting from the stairs to the room underneath, waiting to catch the sight of him.
The expression on his face when he first lays eyes on me in my festive outfit was definitely worth the hours-long shopping trip. He looks me up and down several times, before he finally stops to focus on my eyes with a wide smile.
"Wow," is all he says, but the admiration is written all over his face.
I owed him this much, considering he didn't really feel like going with me tonight when I first mentioned the gala to him. But he has had time to get used to the idea and understand that by agreeing to marry me, he will have to change certain things in his life, including putting on a tux from time to time for society's sake and mine.
"Shall we?" I ask with a smile and he offers his arm, so I link mine with his and we walk to the door together.
The cab is already waiting for us in front of the house. He offered to drive us there and back home, but I didn't want to deprive him from alcohol on top of the whole dressing up and spending the night playing nice thing. He should enjoy his brandy or whatever he feels like having and I certainly don't want to get through the night without my wine either or maybe even something stronger.
We sit in the car and give the driver the directions. As I lean back he takes my hand in his and the gesture puts a smile on my face. I turn my head to look at him and he leans in to place a kiss on my cheek.
The excitement over getting ready tonight is replaced by the calmness I feel on his side and I'm already looking forward to entering the ball room on my fiancé's arms.
o-o-o
Considering Illinois's newly elected governor is also at our table, we are definitely in the center of attention. Will is sitting on my other side with his plus one. I thought he would come with ASA Hellinger, but I wasn't exactly surprised that he showed up with a woman I'd never met before. She is young and pretty enough to be considered his type, but I haven't talked to her much to decide whether she is worthy of my attention. David and Eli are seated on opposite sides of the table, which is ideal given their history and while David seemingly keeps the other side of the table entertained or side is fairly silent and the scarce conversation is often interrupted by guests who come by to congratulate Peter on his win.
My gaze falls on Alicia, who is taking the attention lightly. She is also wearing a red dress, which is brighter than mine and when we greeted each other I joked about how we chose matching colors.
Four years have passed since she started working for our firm and it has proven to be a great decision hiring her. Not only is she an excellent lawyer, but she's always been an asset thanks to her ties to her husband. Moreover I'm sure Peter wouldn't be considering me for the Supreme Court position either if it wasn't for Alicia.
Not that we are friends in the strict meaning of the word, I had been her boss for almost four years, before she became a partner. We had a drink outside the office once, but it's still mainly a work relationship. I acknowledge her abilities and that she's been able to change her life the way she has and I feel like in a way I've been also helping her become who she is now.
"Are these events always so boring?" Kurt asks, leaning close to my ear, so only I can hear his complaint and it makes me smile, "The other side of the table seems to be having much more fun."
"I've noticed that."
"I know it's not exactly appropriate to whisper at the table, so how about we hit the dance floor instead?"
His suggestions surprises me, not because I didn't expect to dance with him tonight, in fact I was very much looking forward to testing his dancing skills, but I honestly thought I'll have to physically pull him to the dance floor, no matter how ridiculous it might have looked. But it seems like he is doing it willingly, making it much easier for me.
"I love the idea," I reply happily and start emerging from my chair, which catches Will's attention, "We're going to dance," I tell him, answering his unvoiced question.
"Have fun, we might join you later," he replies and I turn around to follow Kurt to the dance floor.
The slow rhythm of the song doesn't require too much movement and it also gives me an opportunity to enjoy the warmth of Kurt's body pressed against mine.
"I'm impressed that you can dance like this," I praise him, enjoying how he's firmly leading me to the tunes of the music.
"I had a very old fashioned upbringing that included dance lessons as well," he replies with a smile, taking pleasure in my satisfaction.
"Dance lessons on Monday, shooting lessons on Tuesday?" I ask with a grin, imagining a teenage version of my cowboy with my mind's eyes.
"Something like that," his answer is accompanied by a chuckle and I feel how he's holding me even tighter now.
I glance around in the room, searching for familiar faces when I notice someone I haven't counted with seeing here tonight. I observe how she walks up to our table and shakes hands with Peter, Alicia and Eli then greets Will and his date as well. I can see how she leans to Will to tell him something and soon they are both looking in my direction and when the woman notices me she waves her hand. I reply with a smile and turn to Kurt.
"Do you mind if we stop for a second, there's someone I'd like you to meet," I say and look back at the woman who's now walking towards us.
"Sure," he answers and I pull him by the hand until we meet half way with the person I've been waiting to introduce him to.
"Why didn't you tell me you're coming tonight?" I ask with a slightly scolding tone as we hug each other with my friend.
"I wasn't sure I'd be able to make it," she replies and when we pull back she glances in Kurt's direction.
"This is Senator Hanna Byers, my best friend and this is Kurt McVeigh," I introduce them formally, even though both know about the other already.
I haven't met Hanna since Kurt and I are officially together, but she's heard me talk about him countless times in the last years, so it must feel like she knows him already.
"It's a pleasure to meet you," Hanna extends her hand to Kurt, who shakes it.
"The pleasure is all mine," he replies and I look from one to the other with a happy smile.
Hanna and I have been friends for almost forty years. We went to law school together, that's how we met and even though our lives have turned out very differently, we have stayed friends throughout the years. She has a job that keeps her away from Chicago, but since her family is here she is coming back regularly and whenever she can spare an hour for me in her busy schedule we try our best to keep our friendship alive.
"Is Harold here as well?" I inquire about her husband I haven't seen in a long time.
"Yes, you should join us at our table," she suggests and I look at Kurt who nods approvingly, so we follow Hanna to the other side of the room.
"Diane, it's been too long," Hanna's husband greets me with a wide smile, jumping from his seat and I hug him.
We have always gotten along well, ever since he started dating Hanna decades ago. He was aware that Hanna and I were inseparable and he never tried to come between us.
"This is my fiancé, Kurt McVeigh, Harold Lewis," I introduce the men to each other and they shake hands.
"If I don't see you together with my own eyes I would never have believed you are really getting married."
"I'll only believe once I see you in that wedding dress," Hanna says teasingly, "I hope you'll set a date very soon."
"We're working on it," I reply and smile at Kurt who nods, returning it.
"Can I borrow my friend for some girl talk? Maybe Harold can entertain you with stories about Diane you might haven't heard yet."
"Be careful what you fill his head with," I warn my friend's husband playfully and turn to Kurt to see if he's okay with the arrangement, "I promise you won't be bored this time," I whisper to his ear.
"I'll be fine," he replies and kisses me on the cheek.
"Aren't you two adorable together?" Hanna says as we step away from the men.
"He makes me happy," I reply and look back at Kurt, who's already sitting next to Harold and they seem to have started the conversation, hopefully not only about me.
"And how are things with your judgeship?"
"Nothing is set in stone yet, but things are looking good."
"You deserve it."
"Thank you," I smile at her.
I am excited about the Supreme Court seat, the possibility to crown my career this way. The few minutes I spent in that chamber were unforgettable. I'm aware that such an opportunity only comes once in a lifetime and I have to grab it. On the other hand I cannot help feeling a little sad at the thought of saying goodbye to my firm.
"I know it will be hard to leave everything behind," she says, not surprisingly reading my thoughts as we sit down at the bar.
"Changes can be good," I try to stay positive.
"I like that attitude, we should drink to that. How about a Chardonnay?" she offers and I nod.
I peak back at the table we left behind to make sure Kurt's having a good time and I smile when I see that he is. I don't want to feel guilty for ditching him, if only for a short while.
"Harold will make sure he doesn't miss you too much," Hanna once again reads my mind and I turn back to her with a smile on my face, "You couldn't deny that you are in love," she adds and I'm glad that the waiter places the glass in front of me, so I can grab it and hide behind it as best as I can.
"Isn't it ridiculous in our age?" I ask, holding my glass.
"We are still young," she lifts hers and clinks it to mine.
"If you say so," I smile at her and we both take a sip of our drinks.
"There is a reason I wanted to talk to you alone," she suddenly changes to a serious tone and an unsettling feelings is taking over me as she leans closer, "I heard a rumor and I assume you haven't heard it yet, or you won't be having such a pleasant time with those people at your table tonight."
"What are you talking about?" I look at her stunned and scared of whatever she will reveal to me in any second.
"The new governor's wife has joined a coup. She is starting her own firm with a few of your lawyers and they are taking some of your top clients."
"What?"
Even though I heard every word clearly, I still need time to put them together in my head. Alicia, who's been playing nice with me all evening, is secretly planning to leave the firm and take some top clients? I know I have no reason to doubt Hanna's words, but I can hardly believe Alicia is capable of such a thing.
"I heard it from an inside source who is working for one of your top clients."
"I don't believe this," I shake my head and try to get around to the thought, but it seems to be impossible. How long could she have been planning this? Who else is she taking with her? Is this some kind of a revenge for the way we made her partner? I thought she is happy that she finally got what she wanted.
"I just thought you should know, so you can be prepared."
"Thank you," I say gratefully and my mind is already racing what should be my next step.
Will. I need to talk to Will. I turn to our table and see that his seat is empty, then I remember his promise to meet us at the dance floor and I look at the dancing couples, noticing his tall figure right away.
"You want to talk to Will?" Hanna asks.
"I think he should know too," I say, but then I realize I cannot possibly tell Will now. He has a past with Alicia, he'll surely take this much worse and this is not the right place for him to react, especially not with Alicia and her husband being present, "But I might wait until tomorrow, don't want to ruin his night."
"With her?" Hanna asks, not hiding her derogatory opinion of Will's date, "Who is she anyway?"
"I have no idea," I chuckle and turn back to my friend.
"Too bad I have to give up the hope that you and Will might actually get together someday," she looks at me and her statement makes me chuckle. It's not the first time she's telling me this, but I have learnt to handle her teasing throughout the years. Unfortunately I haven't been able to convince her that Will and I are better as friends, but I'm hoping she will really give up now that I'm about to marry another man.
"You're going to like Kurt," I say, knowing she really likes Will too, but she needs to become friends with my future husband, just like I am with hers.
"I already like Kurt," she replies, making me smile and I'm grateful that she tries to get my mind off the news she's just shared with me.
"I need to get back to him. It's our first time together on such an event, I don't want him to feel neglected," I look at my fiancé, who doesn't seem neglected at all, but I'm sure he won't mind having me back on his side.
"I understand."
"Thank you for telling me."
"Of course. I hope it won't change anything concerning the judgeship."
"I haven't even thought about that," I admit, all I thought about is our firm with Will, how Alicia's leaving will affect it. We need to know what she is planning exactly, who is going with her and which clients they are taking. The judgeship is the last thing on my mind right now, it's different to leave a prospering firm than a sinking ship.
"You have time to think it through, you are one step ahead of her now. And if I can help in any way, let me know."
"Thank you."
She knows I won't use her help, I never have. Just because my best friend is a state senator, she is still my best friend first. I count on her for emotional support, but that's all I ever expected from her.
We walk back to the guys and I place my hands on Kurt's shoulders as I step behind him.
"Hey," he looks up at me and I force a smile on my face, trying to hide my mood, while I still can from him. I know that even if I can't tell Will about this tonight, I need to talk about it with someone and it provides me with great comfort to know that I have him to talk to about anything now, "Are you done with the girl talk?"
"For now," I reply, "How about another dance?" I suggest, I need to stay away from our table as long as possible, I wouldn't be able to play nice with Alicia after what Hanna just uncovered about her.
"I'd love that," he replies and stands up, "It was nice meeting you both," he tells Hanna and her husband.
"It was great to meet you too, Kurt. We need to go on a double date, so I can get to know you better," Hanna suggests, bringing a smile on my face.
"I'm sure we can arrange that," Kurt obviously likes the idea and I'm glad he already seems to have had a pleasant conversation with Harold, that is definitely a good start.
"Call me," I tell Hanna and hug her before we head back to the dance floor with Kurt hand in hand.
"Is everything all right?" he asks, surprising me that he is able to notice that something is up so quickly.
"No, Hanna told me some bad news, but I'd rather wait until we get home to tell you."
"Okay," he replies understandingly and I enjoy feeling his arm around my waist even more now.
I have gotten over many bumps in my life on my own and they have all made me stronger. But with him I don't have to be strong, I can let him be strong for me and comfort me and tonight I need exactly that.
"Why don't we just go home?" I suggest after the song ends and he doesn't question my decision, "Would you please get my purse from our table and say good night? Tell them I'm not feeling well."
"Of course."
I see how he rushes to the table and says a few words to the remaining people there, including Alicia and her husband, takes my red clutch and hurries back to me. I'm not used to having someone putting up excuses on my behalf, but I discover that it feels good to do so.
I'll face her tomorrow and let hell break loose if I must, because I won't allow her go without a fight. If she seriously thinks she can walk out on us taking away our top clients and we will just watch her do so, she clearly underestimates me. I can be her best friend if I want to, but I can also be her worst enemy if she decides to stab me in the back.