I feel something tapping my shoulder. No Hojo, leave me to rot, please. I don't think I can take anymore, I know I've sinned, you don't need to tell me anymore.
"V-Vincent?" I hear someone suprised as they take their hand away from my shoulder, maybe this isn't Hojo? Do I dare to hope that someone else has found me? Could I..? No, I still must atone.
I open my eyes, curosity is really one of the emotions Hojo should have stripped from me. As you know the old saying , curosity killed the cat..well Turk in my case. Looking up I feel blinded by the light, the person who has opened my coffin is staring down at me. Having someone whom you have no idea who they are can make you feel vunerable, though I do my best not to show that.
I think it worked, they seem to back away from my face. Curosity returns to me, it seems to be my favourite emotion. The only one I've been left with, along with hatred. I can still feel the burning in my heart..or whatever Hojo has left me with, when I think of that filthy "scientist".
"Vincent?" the voice brings me out of my thoughts. I look at the offending person, could that be?
"Veld..." I reply. My voice, it sounds deeper and more forbidding. The perfect tone for the monster I've become. I look at the man in front of me. Veld, he was once my partner when I worked for Shinra, excellent gunman with the perfect attitude for a Turk. 'Shoot and move on.' I guess I never had that attitude completely right hence how I ended up in this coffin, Veld hasn't ended up in a coffin as far as I can see.
Envy. So it appears I still have that emotion too. Next to Veld appears to be another person, not that I care. They don't appear to be any threat and Veld seems comfortable, if not some what formal with then. Keep quiet demons, there is no threat yet. The acquientence of Veld asks how he knows me, he tells them we were once partners in the Turks. As far as I remember the times I spent with Veld were good ones, no worries, no problems and no demons. But thats the past now, as I study Veld's face, I realise it really must have been long ago. Gone was the youthful smile he once held instead now his face was scarred and held a pained expression, what had my...friend..been through. Friend, is it still possible for me to call him that? Friend or not thats beside the point, this man has certainly experience some tragedies, I want to ask..but I feel that it's not my place.
He asks for my help, why they'd want my help I shall never know but I agree anyway. Sitting up, my body feels like a dead weight and I'm sure I can feel all my bones clicking as they are moved again. Lying in a coffin for so long, I'm convinced my body hates me right now. Not that I blame it, not at all.
"You... haven't changed. You don't look any different from the day you disappeared." Veld is looking at me confused, I suppose it isn't every day you find your ex partner just lying in a coffin, not aged in the slighest. He's right. I havn't changed physically at all, except my hairs a lot longer and maybe I've lost a little weight, Hojo isn't particularly the kindest of people to say the very least. My clothes are also different, a black body suit which is a little baggy in places and a long red cape which luckily covers half my face. I remember the last time I saw Veld, we had met in the bar here in Nibelheim, I had needed my..friend..it was the day Lucrecia had chosen Hojo over me. It had hurt me more than any gun wound would ever, I will always remember the last words I had said to Veld before returning to my duty at the manor. "If she is happy...then I don't mind..". He had called me insane and said I shouldn't have been such a "pushover", maybe..if I hadn't had been so weak then none of this would have happened, I wouldn't have failed Lucrecia..beautiful Lucrecia.
"The passage of time has no meaning for me. I don't care how long its been," I reply to a slightly confused looking Veld, a small part of me feels like I should applaud him, not out loud obviously. Even though he has found a man ,who he fought beside so many decades ago, that hasn't aged in the slightest. That should have sent someone crazy, it has certainly sent me insane, but I guess Veld wasn't ever like everyone. I guess thats why he's still breathing.
"...Hojo did this to you?" his eyes look sincere with saddness, maybe he's feeling guilty. I don't know why he is, none of this is his fault. I am to take all the blame.
"Sorry..It's not something I can get into. I'm here to atone for the sins I have commited in the past." I say to the sadden man. How long will it take for me to atone I wonder to myself? Probably never, a sin as big as mine should never be forgiven. I don't even deserve the redemption in death. Veld looks slightly hurt, the trust our friendship once had has gone, vanished. He need not be troubled with my sins, my problems. I did that to him in the past, when we were equal, when we were friends but not anymore I am a monster now. Not worthy of anyone's time or care, he should leave me alone again, I need to forget his face.
He explains to me why they came here, they are looking for a certain materia. I should help him, it won't help my atonement but I don't care. Veld was a good friend to me in the past, when I was allowed friends and now it appears that he is still a good man. As I get out of my "beloved" coffin, I notice Veld's right arm. It is no longer there but instead it has been replaced with a silver prothestic, I look at it closer and then at my own left arm. Mine is gold and a gift from Hojo, I hate it. But maybe this is something along the lines of fate? Veld and I...no we are no longer any form of acquientences, I'm just the ghost in the basement who he wants to help him. He notices my arm and gasps quietly, I look at him in the eyes for the first time. He really has aged significantly.
Many years ago he would have most likely have made a joke about our seemingly matching prothestics, if we had been gifted with them back then. Veld always was the louder one with a great sense of humour. Humour, now thats something I havn't experience in so long. What did it feel like to laugh..the only laughing I've heard in the past decades is that of Hojo. Does all laughter sound so evil? I couldn't possibly remember.
Once I've been of use to him and told him where to find the materia, he steps closer to me. What is this feeling now I'm experiencing? Saddness at him leaving? Do I miss Veld?
"We will meet again later, Vincent." there is a look of pain in Veld's eyes, does he really want to spend more time with me? Am I that important to him so much that he would come back for me..no..no one ever comes back. No matter how much I scream, not even Hojo comes back anymore.
"I have no intention of leaving this place," I tell him honestly,"This is where I must continue to atone for my sins." I don't deserve the luxery of being able to leave this place, this is my hell though sometimes I feel as though hell is even too good for me. I do still have a coffin to sleep in, I suppose sometimes I should feel greatly for the coffin since it is certainly better than just being left a freezing cold cell. Maybe I don't even deserve the coffin?
Veld steps closer to me again, I step back. "Vincent..." he says quietly. I don't reply, there is nothing more for me to say, I want him to leave now.
"Go Veld. Leave me. I will not come with you." I say firmly, it seals the deal that he shouldn't try to come back for me. Hurt flashes in his eyes and for a second I see the look of my old friend, a slight fire in his eyes returns.
"Vincent. I don't know what has happened to you..but we will meet again. I promise, my friend." Before I can react, he has got me in a strong embrace, it feels strange..very strange. So long since I've had human contact, such caring..kind contact. I feel myself slipping slightly, as I indulge myself selfishly into the embrace. I stop myself suddenly, ' letting your guard down won't get you anywhere Valentine,' I convince myself. Pushing Veld away from me, I return to my coffin and give him one last look.
"Goodbye Veld." I say coldly to him, no point in letting him him hope for a reunion of some sort. I know he won't come back, I know from past experiences that no one ever comes back for me. Not my father, not Lucrecia, not the Turks when I went missing, not even Hojo. Why would Veld be any different? He wouldn't be, I tell myself.
I close the lid back on my coffin and shut my eyes..waiting for the nightmares to come back and haunt me. But they don't..for one night I am granted a slight amount of peace that I don't deserve. My nightmares are replaced with memories of Veld and I. Maybe..I dare to dream that one day this nightmare will end? No, I am wrong to even think of hoping... The nightmare is just beginning.