Thanks To Your Music
AsaKiku Secret Santa 2015
Written for konnichichi on Tumblr
"You are very talented."
Arthur whipped around, just as he finished putting away his violin, to find a shorter man with black hair and warm brown eyes staring up at him. Had this man just complimented him?
"Thank you," Arthur replied as he observed the other man. He was donned in a nicely tailored suit, something a member of the upper middle class would wear.
The shorter man held out some money to Arthur and commented, "Thank you for playing the violin so beautifully. I hope to see you play again." He then gave a small bow and walked away.
Arthur stared after the stranger. "He doesn't look like he's from here, and his english has some kind of accent."
The next day, Arthur saw the stranger again. Like the day before, he complimented Arthur's violin playing, gave him some change, and left. This routine kept repeating everyday, for a couple of weeks, and soon Arthur found himself looking forward to the man's short visits. One day, after receiving his compliment and change, Arthur decided to take the initiative and ask the stranger, "Excuse me, sir. If you don't mind me asking, may I know where you're from? You don't seem to be from around here."
The stranger nodded. "I am visiting from a country called Japan. I am not sure if you know where it is, but it is very far from here." He bowed and then hesitantly offered his hand. "My name is Kiku. Kiku Honda. Pleased to meet you."
Arthur took Kiku's hand and gave him a firm handshake. "Arthur Kirkland. Pleasure to meet you as well. I can't say that I know where your country is, though. Sorry."
"No need to apologize. Japan is very far from here. I have to say, life in England is very, very different," Kiku commented, as he attempted to make small talk. "It is a very prosperous country, however, and I am learning so many things." He gave a small smile to Arthur. "You have to be one of the most talented performers I have ever listened to. I hope you continue to grace the streets with your music."
"Pardon me if I'm being rude, but why would you go out of your way to come and talk to a lowly street performer like me?" Arthur asked carefully.
"Should I not have greeted you?" Kiku asked. "I just believe your playing is deserving of a compliment. I am sorry if I have made you uncomfortable."
Arthur lightly blushed and shook his head. "No, I...just didn't expect someone like you to come and talk to me."
Kiku tilted his head in question. "Someone like me?"
"Oh, you look like you're well off," Arthur explained. "Usually people who are from the upper class do not tend to talk to performers like me."
"I believe that class should not separate anyone. We are all human after all," Kiku replied with a calm smile. "I have an event to attend to soon, so I need to hurry, but it was nice to have a conversation with you, Kirkland-san."
A confused Arthur blinked a couple of times. "...San?"
"Oh, I apologize. In Japan adding 'san' to the end of an acquaintance's name is just customary," Kiku explained.
"I see. Well, it was nice talking to you as well, Mr. Honda."
With a nod, Kiku left. The next day Kiku came by earlier than usual and was able to hear more of Arthur's music. After Arthur's performance, the two men talked more and gradually became more comfortable with each other. This kept repeating for another week, and before he knew it, Arthur found himself refusing to take Kiku's money.
"I insist, Arthur-san," Kiku said, using Arthur's first name since they became comfortable enough around each other. The Japanese man gently pushed the money to Arthur's chest.
"It's fine, Kiku. I find it rewarding enough that you come by to listen to my music everyday," Arthur reassured. He laid one of his hands on Kiku's fist and slowly pushed back, not noticing the pink tint coloring Kiku's cheeks nor the small jump the Japanese man did.
Kiku quickly retracted his hand from Arthur's and his heartbeat quickened slightly. "I-If that is what you wish, Arthur-san." After a moment of awkward silence, Kiku excused himself and left, with a small blush still on his cheeks.
"Why...am I feeling this way now?" Kiku thought as he walked home. "Why...with someone who I cannot even spend the rest of my life with?"
"Arthur-san, you do not seem very well today," Kiku commented after observing Arthur's dejected face. "Your playing sounds a little solemn as well."
Arthur cracked a small smile. "You're really observant, Kiku." After a pause, he continued, "Do you mind if I talk about my troubles for a bit? You're...one of the only friends I have and it'd be nice if…"
"Please go ahead," Kiku softly interrupted. "Do not hold back anything if it makes you feel worse."
"Thank you, Kiku," Arthur said. "It's my older brother. He's sick and has gotten even worse recently. But I can't afford to take him to the doctor nor pay for any medication."
"I did not know that you have a brother, Arthur-san."
"His name's Scott, and he's a strange one. Ever since our parents died, we only had each other. He took care of me but also teased me a lot. You could say we have a love-hate relationship," Arthur explained. He turned to Kiku and gave a solemn smile. "I just wish I could do more for him."
Kiku, being a slightly socially awkward person, just placed his hand on Arthur's shoulder and patted it to give him some comfort. "Please do not think about it pessimistically, Arthur-san. I believe that if he can visit a doctor…"
"But neither him nor I have enough money for that. I'm just a street performer, and he got laid off from his job not too long ago," Arthur dejectedly said. "I just...I just wish I could repay him for everything he did for me."
Kiku heard a small sniff from the Brit and started to panic a little. "Wh-What should I do? I'm not very good at comforting people." Kiku awkwardly shifted his hand from Arthur's shoulder to his head and soothingly petted it. Arthur also scooted closer to Kiku and placed his forehead on the smaller man's shoulder. Kiku flinched, surprised at the contact, but didn't attempt to move away. Instead, with a blush adorning his cheeks, Kiku raised his trembling arms and wrapped it around Arthur. He felt a bit uncomfortable at first, but once he felt Arthur's tears on his shoulder, he brought the Englishman closer and rubbed Arthur's back.
"I-I apologize if I am a bad listener," Kiku apologized. "I am just not very good a-at comforting grieving people nor am I very comfortable with direct contact."
Arthur slowly shook his head. "No, you're a great listener, Kiku." Arthur raised his head, prompting Kiku to release his hold on him. Green eyes, shining from tears, bore into brown ones. Kiku was mesmerized by the luminescence of Arthur's eyes while Arthur himself was drawn to Kiku's mysterious ones. Seconds passed by and the two of them still couldn't take their eyes off each other.
It was then that both men realized that the person in front of them actually held a more precious place in their hearts than they thought. "All this time I was always ecstatic when Kiku came by. I forgot that I was even playing for money. I-I like him...I like him a lot. I never thought- how could I fall in love with someone who's of a higher class?"
"I can't believe this. I can't believe this. I can't believe this," Kiku chanted in his mind. His blush darkened as he kept his gaze on Arthur and came to terms about his feelings for the Englishman. "I can fully admit it to myself now. I have somehow fallen in love with Arthur-san."
Although the two of them could admit their feelings to themselves, it would take much more time and effort for them to admit their feelings to each other. Once they were broken from their trance, they quickly looked away; both of them flushed from embarrassment.
"S-Sorry," Arthur whispered. "I-I got a tad carried away."
Still not facing Arthur, Kiku replied, "N-No, I was at fault as well." Kiku was then struck by an idea. An idea that could possibly help, or even save, Arthur's brother. The Asian man whipped around to face Arthur, who was still blushing, with a hand over his mouth. "A-Arthur-san, I would like to suggest an idea. I... believe I can help your brother."
The Brit finally turned back around. "Kiku, thank you so much for your offer, but it wasn't my intention to ask for your pity. I don't want to bother you…"
"It is not a bother at all!" Kiku reassured in a slightly louder voice. "I-I really do want to help you. It would be my pleasure to."
Arthur wiped the leftover tears from his eyes and chuckled. "Kiku, I can't tell you how grateful I am. You're probably...no, you are the kindest nobleman I've ever seen."
"Please, it is my pleasure," Kiku said. "If you do not mind, would you please take me to your brother? I studied medicine for some time when I was in Japan. Hopefully I can relieve your brother of some of his pain temporarily and then I can hire a local doctor."
With his mouth slightly agape, Arthur stared at Kiku for a moment then broke into a huge, genuine smile. "Kiku...I really can't thank you enough. We only met three weeks ago and you're already doing so much for me. I even feel slightly guilty."
"There is nothing to feel guilty about," Kiku reassured. "I am just doing what I believe is the right thing: helping out a...a friend in need."
Arthur felt slightly hurt when Kiku referred to him as a friend, but he just shrugged it off, not wanting to burden the Japanese man with even more of his feelings. "Thank you so much. You're amazing," Arthur whispered.
True to his word, after Kiku followed Arthur to his house, he took a look at his brother as best as he could. Then, as soon as possible, Kiku managed to find a doctor who was willing to help the brothers. Even though Arthur insisted that he pay part of the medical expenses, Kiku politely refused, insisting that he cover everything.
"Let me repay you somehow!" Arthur pleaded.
"Then would you please perform at some at some gatherings that I am hosting?" Kiku asked. "You would be doing me a great favor."
"I accept," Arthur quickly answered.
As time passed, Scott slowly recovered, but still wasn't well enough, while Arthur was invited to perform at Kiku's mansion. At first the Brit was awed by the size of the mansion, then he got nervous as crowds of guests piled in. Soon, it was time for his performance, and Arthur was sweating bullets.
"Calm down, calm down," Arthur mentally prepared himself. He gulped. "What if I make mistakes? It would reflect badly on Kiku."
Kiku noticed Arthur trembling from nervousness next to him. The Japanese man tapped the Brit on his shoulder and whispered, "Arthur-san, just play like you usually do."
"But the people here are all noblemen. I've only performed on the streets, never for people of a higher class," Arthur quietly replied.
Kiku pointed to himself. "You have performed in front of me many times. I trust you, Arthur-san. Just play like you always do."
Arthur sucked in a deep breath and kept Kiku's encouraging words in mind. "Thank you. I will do my best." With that, Arthur walked out, and soon, everyone's eyes were on him.
People did talk. There were whispers criticizing Kiku for bringing in a lowly street performer, but there were others who were curious about Arthur's ability. Arthur steeled himself and placed his violin in position, ready to play. As he played the first few notes, he thought back on the first time he met Kiku, and the buildup of their friendship. His eyes wandered over to Kiku, who was watching him intently with a calm smile.
"You are doing very well," Kiku mouthed and gave him a small nod.
A bright smile decorated Arthur's face as he kept his eyes on the Asian man and started playing more passionately. Throughout the whole performance, Arthur and Kiku kept their eyes on each other, and from time to time Kiku would mouth words of encouragement, which would give Arthur more courage and also calm his nerves. As long as Arthur kept his eyes on Kiku, his nervousness never haunted him and he felt as light as a feather. After his performance, Arthur gave a bow and the whole room erupted in applause. Many people approached Kiku and wanted to know how he found Arthur while some others came up to Arthur and complimented him on his playing.
"You played magnificently, Arthur-san," Kiku complimented. The party was over and everyone else had gone home. The two of them were sitting in Kiku's garden under the night sky, and sipping on some Japanese tea that Kiku brought.
"I have to say, I was a extremely nervous at first," Arthur said. "What if I had done poorly? I would have given you a bad name."
"But everyone loved your performance," Kiku reminded.
"Thanks to you," Arthur added. "Without your encouragement, I would probably have not been able to perform as well as I did." A cool breeze caused some stray leaves to blow in their direction. Both men's hair got slightly disheveled and couple of leaves got stuck in them as well.
Kiku and Arthur glanced at each other and chuckled. They leaned in to brush the leaves off each other. With smiles, they innocently picked the leaves off. Only when the leaves were gone did they realize the position they were in. Arthur was looking down while Kiku was looking up, both of them flustered at how close their faces were.
However, instead of quickly pushing apart and apologizing, both of them automatically drew closer, so close that the tips of their noses were touching. With their hearts beating rapidly, both men shut their eyes and lightly pressed their lips together. After a few seconds, they slowly drew back and pressed their foreheads together, staring into each other's eyes.
A beautiful red flush colored Kiku's cheeks once his mind processed what they had just done. He swiftly drew his head back and started stuttering profusely, "I-I-I am so s-sorry! I-I do not know wh-what came over me!"
An equally embarrassed Arthur stammered an apology as well. "I-It's my fault too! I'm s-sorry! Please don't get angry."
"I-I am not angry," Kiku whispered. "I...Um, i-it f-felt n-n-nice…"
Arthur buried his face in his hands, feeling his face heat up even more. "Ah, I...er, I actually, erm, l-l-liked it a-as well…" He removed his hands from his face and focused once again on Kiku, who was very tense and had his hands, fisted, on his thighs.
"This is such a big risk," Arthur thought as he gulped. "But I will go through with this."
"Kiku," Arthur called. The Brit was as tense as his Asian friend and was desperately trying to not get his nerves get the better of him. "I h-hope I won't lose our friendship after what I'm a-about to say, but...I...I think...no, I do...f-f-fancy you. A lot."
Kiku blinked a few times and gawked at Arthur. He then cleared his throat and bashfully replied, "I-I also l-l-like you a lot, A-Arthur-san." At hearing Kiku's answer, Arthur let out the breath he didn't realized he'd been holding, but before he could get his hopes up, Kiku continued, "However...I will be leaving England in three weeks."
"Right...you'll be going back to Japan, huh…" Arthur murmured dejectedly. "I-I see. I should have expected that, huh?"
Kiku brought his gaze down, not wanting to see Arthur's hurt expression. "I am so sorry…"
"It really isn't your fault, Kiku. It isn't anyone's. You have to go back home sooner or later." Arthur placed his hands on Kiku's fisted ones and gently held them. "We have three whole weeks. Why don't we make the most of them?"
A smile tugged on Kiku's lips. "Yes. Let us do so." The two men then chuckled and leaned in again for a kiss.
Arthur and Kiku had not had as much fun in their whole lives than they did in the three weeks they spent together. Kiku got to talk to Scott, and if Scott was well enough to travel, Kiku would bring them over to his mansion and treat them to dinner. Arthur, in turn, showed Kiku around London and defended him against any potential pickpockets or thieves. Arthur also continued to perform on the streets, with Kiku being there for his whole performance. On top of everything, Arthur introduced Kiku to the children he befriended on the streets, and Kiku, being the kind soul he is, brought small presents for the children.
Three weeks flew by and before they knew it, Arthur and Kiku were at the shipyard. Tears balanced threateningly at the corners of the Brit's eyes as he said his goodbye to Kiku.
"Thank you for everything you did," Arthur sniffed, finally letting his tears fall. "Thank you so much for sharing these past weeks with me." After a pause, he finally confessed, "I love you."
Kiku himself was trying to hold back tears. In Japanese, Arthur replied,"I...I love you too." He repeated it again in English, "I love you. Thank you for showing me love," Kiku replied with tears in his eyes as well. "And thank you for showing me how beautiful your music is." They intertwined their fingers and Arthur pressed a kiss to Kiku's forehead. Once Arthur pulled away, Kiku, with a burst of confidence, leaned up to press his lips against Arthur's.
After Kiku drew back, Arthur pulled him back in for a hug. "Please...visit England again sometime."
Kiku could hear the pain in Arthur's voice as he wrapped his arms around the Englishman. He tried to remain calm, tried to not let his sadness or disappointment show."I...I will try." At that moment, Kiku content, with his head on Arthur's chest, listening to his heartbeat. Soon, Kiku could hear his travelling companion nearby calling his name, cutting his farewell short. They kissed one last time and then pulled apart. Kiku bowed and said one final goodbye. "Once again, thank you. Goodbye."
Kiku turned and started to walk away, but Arthur stopped him. He brought out a leather bound book from his bag and held it out to Kiku. "Please, take this. It's my journal."
"I cannot take your journal," Kiku protested, but Arthur wouldn't have it.
"Please."
Kiku gave in and accepted the book. He tucked it under his arm and bit his lip as he quickly thought about a gift he could give Arthur in return. With his free hand, Kiku opened his pouch and pulled out a folded piece of cloth.
"This is made out of Japanese silk. It is too small to make anything out of, but please accept it."
Arthur took his gift and neatly put it away. "Thank you. Goodbye, Kiku. Have a safe trip back."
Both men gave each other a bow, turned, and walked away while brushing their tears away. His companion gave him a look of sympathy and decided to leave Kiku to himself as they boarded the ship. Once the ship had sailed, Kiku's companion plucked the courage to say, "Honda-san, you already know that we…"
"That we will most likely not get another chance to come back to England?" Kiku finished. His eyes were closed as he ran his fingers along the leather bound cover of Arthur's journal. More tears threatened to fall, but he refused to cry in front of his companion. "Yes...I knew."
Kiku never had the chance to travel back to England. The only thing he had that reminded him of Arthur was his journal. Kiku couldn't remember how many times he had read the journal, but every time he did, he was always in tears at the end.
In England, Arthur treated the silk cloth as if it was his most precious possession. For some days, Arthur couldn't bring himself to perform on the streets, since it reminded him too much of Kiku. The children constantly asking him where Kiku went made it even worse. It was only after a couple of weeks that Arthur was able to perform again, but even then, the songs he played were melancholy.
Months passed, then years. Later, Kiku found himself being forced into an arranged marriage with a woman of high standing. Although Arthur still held his heart, Kiku couldn't refuse his family's wishes. So, he ended up married to a woman he didn't love, while his heart still yearned for the man he parted with in England years ago. He knew it was unfair for his wife, but he still couldn't let his feelings for Arthur go. Even more time passed, and his wife gave birth to a baby boy. Kiku's feelings of guilt intensified, but the birth of his son helped him strengthen his resolve. He would finally try to let his feelings for Arthur go. It took him months, almost a year, but he was finally able to steel himself. He placed Arthur's journal in a small chest and buried it under a sakura tree that was growing near his home.
"Thank you for all the memories," Kiku whispered as he smoothed out the dirt. "Thank you for making me feel loved and showing me what love feels like." The Japanese man gave a sad smile. "Thank you…Goodbye"
Similarly, Arthur found himself still in love years after they parted. 10 years flew by, and there was still no sign of Kiku. Scott, along with his wife, kept advising Arthur to let go of his feelings for Kiku and find a new love, but Arthur refused. He still carried hope that Kiku would come back, but after 10 years, his hope dwindled significantly.
One day, Arthur made his way to the shipyard and gazed out toward the sea. He brought out a bottle, the silk cloth that he kept in pristine condition for all these years, and stuffed the cloth inside the bottle. After he finished mentally preparing himself, Arthur pulled back his arm and, with all his might, and threw the bottle into the sea.
"Goodbye, Kiku," Arthur sadly whispered. "Thank you so much for everything...and for being my first love." The Englishman then returned home, with a newfound resolve. He would keep playing the violin, but he would also try to find a separate job so that him, Scott, and Scott's wife could live with fewer troubles.
"Grandpa!" A ten year old girl with jet black hair and chocolate brown eyes called. She ran into the house, leaving her dirty shoes outside, as she sought out her grandfather. "Grandpa! Pochi and I found something!"
"Oh? What is it?" The amused grandfather asked.
The child held out a small, old chest with a large grin. "Pochi started digging under the sakura tree outside, and then I helped him dig! Do you think there's something really precious in there, grandpa?"
The child waited for her grandfather to answer, but for a while, all she received was a calm smile. "Grandpa Kiku?" The child called, urging her grandfather to answer.
"Ah, I'm sorry. I just...remembered something," Kiku answered. He took the chest from his grandchild and opened the lid. He delicately brought out the old journal and turned to his grandchild. "Sakura, would you like to hear a story of my time in England years ago?"
I decided to also participate in the AsaKiku Secret Santa event, and this was the one-shot that resulted from it from one of konnichichi's prompts! I got carried away with her prompt though. ^^; Forgive me if I'm not historically accurate! I know very little about history. . But I hope everyone enjoyed reading it! Reviews and feedback are much appreciated! ^_^
(I was gonna make it fluffy and have a happy ending at first, but I wanted to try writing a sad ending, so this happened. ^^;)