It is a thrill that must be avoided. A rush that must be kept at bay. But the need comes more and more.
Not her need, no. That, she could keep locked away in the deepest, darkest part of her soul for the rest of her life if she had to. No, not her need, but God's need, Protestantism's need, England's need, Hellsing's need. They need her to call the demon again and again, and the thrill rushes through her every time. She loves calling the monster and he loves being called and one day this cycle will damn her.