Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any way, shape, or form. Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto.

Warning: This story has mature content including; Language, sexual content and violence.

Chapter 1: HIDAN, YOU BAKA!

~Zori's prov~

"OK, now all we have to do is seal his chakra up 'till we get back to the base." I said as thought aloud.

Hidan, snorted, like the jack ass he is. "Yeah, sweet cheeks, how the fuck do you think we do that?" He walked over and kicked the kids unconscious body, he guffawed when the body twitched.

I rolled my eyes and fake gagged at the nick name. "I know a jutsu, dip-shit." I formed a few signs, bit my thumb, and continued. I bent down and was about to place the seal when Hidan slapped my ass. I slammed my hand down with the wrong amount of chakra, but the seal formed to fast for me to stop. I glowered at Hidan. He smirked like a pervert. " YOU BAKA! WHO KNOWS HOW LONG THE SEAL WILL LAST NOW!"

He snarled at me. "Bitch! I'm not a baka!" He crossed his arms and stuck his nose up. "I'm a fucking smart person! I just do really damn stupid shit..."

My eye twitched as soon they both darkened, and my blood lust grew. "I'm gonna kill you..." I said it just above a whisper.

He cupped his ear. "What was that bitchy?" He smirked.

I wrapped my hands around his neck and gripped it with chakra. "I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL KILL YOU UNTIL YOU ARE FUCKING DEAD, YOU CRAZY ASS, SON OF A BITCH!". I laughed like a crazy person when his face turned purple.

"What the hell did he do now?" the mysterious voice came from above us.

I looked up, hands still on Hidan's neck, and saw the big white bird starts to land. A smile found its way onto my lips "Hello Deidara no Danna." I shook Hidan a little as I spoke, then giggled as he made a gurgling noise.

The blond bomber raised an eyebrow.

My hands loosened on Hidan's neck, and I got up to show respect my senpai. "He violated me as I was performing a jutsu and now...the 9 tails may or not may be locked up powerless for his lifetime."

The Jashint rubbed his neck and croaked out "Bitch" and mumbled a few more curses.

I stifled a laugh.

Deidara frowned. "Crap..." His clay creation walked over and gulped down he 9 tails. "I'll get his body there faster, you 2 walk, and try not to kill one another, hmm" He jumped up on the bird and it took off.

Eyes, glued to him as he flew away at incredible speeds. I could only gape at him, at his grace yet power. I was proud, proud to call him my Danna, proud to see his wonderful art, proud to meet and know such an amazing man.

"WHERE IS NARUTO?!" A pinked hair girl flew out of the woods. She then flung a tree at us! A FREAKING TREE! Hidan and I dodged it easily. She looked as crazed as the 9 tails himself. "TELL ME OR SO HELP ME, I WILL KILL EVERY ONE OF YOU WITH MY BARE HANDS!"

I chuckled and said to Hidan "Shall we take our leave?" I sent a smirk flying the girls way.

Hidan laughed "Hell yes."

I flipped her off and threw some smoke bombs out to make our get away. We ran like hell to get out of there. Hidan was too slow, so I grabbed his arm and ran at full speed dragging him behind me.

~~~~~~~~~~~With Deidara~~~~~~~~~~~~

~Deidara's prov~

A sigh escaped my lips "Pein is gonna have their asses for this, un..." I couldn't help but worry about Zori, she only joined 3 months ago and now she messed up, and on the extreme level as well. I should've told Pein not to pair her up with Hidan, but no I just had to keep my mouth shut for once. Now the poor thing might have to trade places with Tobi and let him become a member. I shivered at the thought of that dumb ass joining. I'll never let that happen. I'll just explain to Pein that its Hidan's fault, which it is, and hope Zori dosen't get in trouble, or worse...I cleared my mind off the problem and focused on flying, and could only hope this might turn out like I want it too.

~~~~~~~~~~~In Amegakure~~~~~~~~~~~~

I flew down on to the wet and muddy grounds of Amegakure. I jumped down, shook the water from my hair as best I could and flipped off the clouds, hopefully Pein didn't see that with the chakra rain he might have been using... In a flash of lightning Zori and Hidan appeared next to me, Zori laughing as Hidan ran to the bushes and puked up a spleen, or it least sounded like he was.

Zori smiled brightly at me "Hello, again, Deidara no Danna." She bowed in respect.

I nodded back her, and smiled "I'm surprised, usually you are the one with your head in the bush when you do that." I started walking and the bird flew just above the ground.

She clasped her stomach and frowned "I try not to think about it..." She jogged up to me, and looked at the ground, frowning in disappointment. "I'm sorry Deidara no Danna, I messed up, and I have no clue of the size of the problem I caused..."

I glanced at her, and then looked up at the clouds letting the rain stream down my face. "You did mess up..." She looked even more depressed. "But we can't change it now, hmmm. So lets move forward and let what fate choose what happens next."

A determined look showed on her face and she nodded. "Hai! Deidara no Danna!"

Hidan stumbled up and glared at Zori "Bitch..." he snarled at her. The villagers around us saw this and hid knowing what would happen if they got in Hidan's way at the wrong time, well, right time in a sense.

At that moment a little girl ran into him.

He smirked evilly and bent down and said "Hey, little whore, have you heard of Jashin?" He gripped her collar and got his kunai out.

"Hidan. Don't lay another finger on that child or you will have Pein and me to deal with." The villagers cheered for Konan calling her, 'lady Angel'. Konan walked over and grabbed the kid nicely and held her. "Are you OK little one?"

"H-hai, lady a-angel." She was shocked to see Konan.

Konan Smiled lightly and made a origami butterfly and handed it to her. "Please try to watch where you are going next time."

The little girl nodded, and gracefully took the paper butterfly.

Konan set her down.

She scrambled to her parent to show them her gift. She turned, glared at Hidan and glance at Zori and me.

"Was the mission accomplished?" Konan asked.

I was the first to speak, "Yes, but there was a complication."

She glanced at me. "Will discuss this with Pein." and with that we ran to the base.