The O.C. – Whenever the wind calls out
A series of one–shots related to my other story, "Until the tide changes", or barely related to it.
Chapter 0001: Beyond the horizon
Ryan Nichol knew no life outside of Newport
Ryan let his sister, Kirsten, embrace him, even though he wanted to push her away. Nevertheless, he enjoyed her show of love for a few more moments.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" – she asked gently.
"Yeah, I'm sure"
"You realize– I mean, you know it's not..." – she trailed off and frowned worriedly – "Sweetie, you understand why you've never met them before, right?"
"Kirsten, it's fine, I know what I'm getting into, but I think I'm old enough to make my own decisions" – he paused – "At least about this"
"Well, alright then. I just don't want you to be hurt"
"I know"
"Do you want Sandy to come with us?"
"No, thank you" – he was quick to say, and she laughed a little.
"Oh, he'd behave!"
"Right, and that's why Seth's not coming either"
"Yeah, he tried to talk his way into it, but I'm happy to inform Sandy's lawyering genes didn't get to 'im"
"And the world is all the happier for it"
"I'm proud of you, you know, kid?" – Ryan snorted.
"Yes, so you've told me all my life, sis"
"It is a wonder your head is not bigger" – she teased.
Kirsten looked around them as they climbed out of her all too expensive car with clear worry. Ryan rushed to stand close to her and send a dark glare around them, though there weren't many people around in the first place.
"Maybe we should have asked them to come to us" – Kirsten whispered as they walked over across the way to the Atwood house.
"You're the one who said it would be rude to do that" – he pointed out.
"Must you have such a good memory?"
"Sorry, I got the Nichol smarts"
"You're not funny"
"That's what you tell Seth, and we both know it's not entirely true. Most of the time, anyway"
She gave him a tremulous smile as they both took a deep breath in front of the dingy, badly cared for door. Kirsten made to press the doorbell, but Ryan beat her to it, and he welcomed her warm hand on his for a second before the door flew open and a taller, blond and scruffy young man stared them down.
"Hey" – he at last greeted, giving them a smirk Ryan immediately didn't care for.
"Hello" – Kirsten bravely greeted back, grinning politely – "Are you– Trey?"
"That's me. You Ryan?" – he looked the teen up and down, and Ryan wondered whether he should have worn something else, as Sandy playfully told him to – "You guys are early, mom's still asleep"
"Oh. We can come back, if you prefer" – Kirsten demurred.
"Nah, c'mon, I'll go get 'er. You guys want a beer or something? I don't think we got coffee or whatever, so..."
"No, thank you" – Kirsten stiffly allowed Ryan to walk in front of her, and the teen was the first to sit on the questionable couch.
"Well, I'm gonna go get 'er" – Trey announced, disappearing into a hallway.
Ryan looked around, taking in the empty bottles all over, the bag of trash in a corner, the lack of photographs. Would this have been his life, if his father hadn't come for him just after he was born and brought him over to Newport? He couldn't imagine a life with a brother like Trey, with a mother like–
"Ryan!" – a woman with straggly, bleach blond hair exclaimed, appearing in the living room with a wild look in her eyes. Kirsten became rigid beside him as the woman, Dawn Atwood, approached with her arms open, as if Ryan should rush into them, but he had been half raised by Kirsten, so he still got up and stood frozen as his biological mother hugged him for a moment too long – "You're so grown up!" – she gushed – "So handsome!"
"Thank you" – Ryan stated hesitantly, glancing at Trey, who walked over to the tiny kitchen and grabbed himself a beer.
"Sit, sit! Oh, Trey, I bought some juice for them, could you get it?"
"I think you mixed it with the vodka last night" – the man said, not pausing from drinking. Dawn frowned in confusion then looked embarrassed at Ryan and Kirsten.
"I'm sorry, I– I forgot, I meant to keep some, I swear!"
"It's not a problem, don't worry about it" – Kirsten said soothingly.
"No, but, I haven't seen my boy in so long, I should have something for him" – Trey snorted in the background.
"He hasn't come around in sixteen years, I don't think it's because you didn't buy juice, ma" – he stated dryly, giving Ryan a sardonic snarl.
"Don't listen to Trey" – Dawn urged – "Oh, but tell me all about your life! It must be so nice" – she finished, almost wistfully, and Ryan felt something akin to regret from her tone.
Except he could remember his father telling him over and over that this was the same woman who accepted a very high price to give him up to Caleb, who never wrote him though Caleb said he'd allowed it, who never called him even though Sandy assured him he'd reached out a couple years prior to give her the Cohens' and Nichol's updated contact information. But she remained the woman who carried him in her womb, who gave him his name, who let Caleb take him so he could have a life that didn't involve a brother who so rudely spoke to and about their mother in front of strangers.
"I'm... Doing fine. I, hum, I get good grades in school..." – he briefly looked at Kirsten – "I play soccer? And I surf"
"You surf?" – Trey questioned with a hint of sarcasm – "I guess kids down in Newport have lots of time on their hands"
"Trey" – Dawn snapped.
"What? Like this is not weird for everyone involved? Some kid you popped out sixteen years ago waltzes into the house for what? To check how the other side lives?" – he shook his head and gulped the last of his beer – "I'm going out" – he announced, already stomping off.
"No, Trey, please" – Dawn pleaded just before he slammed the door behind him. The three remained quiet for long seconds – "He's just– He's not always like this" – she promised.
"We understand" – Kirsten retorted kindly – "It must be a difficult situation"
"Yeah. Yeah! Yes, sure. He just– He was really upset he didn't get to have a little brother, you know. He's kind of an only child" – her smile was pained and empty, and Ryan wished he could want to comfort her as a son would a mother.
The visit didn't last much longer, even as Dawn seemed desperate to keep Ryan around, and show off the house she'd bought with Caleb's money, though she didn't put it that way, all those years ago. Ryan couldn't help but be a little glad his mother and brother at least had a roof over their heads.
"I'm glad you came" – Dawn stated, sounding and looking fragile as she stood in the porch, hugging herself and smiling hesitatingly – "I missed you"
"Thank you for having us" – Ryan finally said, unsure what else there was to say between them. Dawn blinked away tears and he had to stand his ground when she suddenly threw herself at him and hugged him tightly.
"I love you so much, my sweet boy" – she murmured against his shoulder – "You're such a good boy"
"Dawn–" – Kirsten tried.
"I'm sorry" – Dawn finally said, letting Ryan go – "I'm sorry"
"I–"
"You shouldn't come back" – Dawn stated, straightening in place – "I'm so happy you came... But you have a good life with your– With Cal, and your– Your family, I don't want to mess that up"
"I didn't mean–"
"It's okay, kid. God, you're such a handsome boy! How did I–" – she bit back a broken smile and looked at Kirsten – "Thank you for bringing him, but you guys should go before... Before it gets dark"
"Yes, of course" – Kirsten easily agreed.
"Thank you for looking after him" – Dawn whispered as she shook her head – "You've done a good job"
Kirsten said nothing, just continued looking at Dawn, something Ryan no longer could do.
"Goodbye" – she at last said, and Dawn remained rooted in place, looking at them leave.
As Kirsten wordlessly drove away, Ryan looked out the window at Dawn, who had come down from the porch to stare after them. She looked sad and lonely with the Sun hitting her face just so, and Ryan had to make himself away.
"I'm sorry this wasn't what you were expecting" – Kirsten said when they paused at a traffic stop.
"I'm not sure what I was expecting" – he confessed – "She was–" – for all his years in the best schools in Newport, he couldn't find the right word to describe the woman who'd give birth to him, given him up.
"We can come back any time you want, you know?"
"... I don't think we should"
"Are you sure?"
He looked outside as the light changed to green, at the houses exactly like Dawn's, at the people talking and laughing and kissing and hugging and living. He even spotted his– He spotted Trey, drinking with some other men Ryan was deeply glad he would likely never have to be around, because the way they talked to two girls who walked past them made his stomach turn.
"I'm sure" – he said, looking back at her.
Seth was wrong, Newport wasn't that bad after all.
... So, no, I don't know why. A little exploration of how Ryan could be if he had grown up in Newport with Caleb (and the Cohens) and went to see what he (thankfully) missed out on.
I accept prompts, in the normal "Until the tide changes" universe, or around it, like this story.
Cheers!