When you're gone
Ayane Selznick
A RyoSaku Songfic
Genre: Romance/Songfic
Summary: All I ever wanted was for you to know everything I do I give my heart and soul no matter how much you walk away with your back slowly fading away.
Pairings: Ryoma Echizen & Sakuno Ryuuzaki
Author's Note: First one-shot song fic for PoT. When I listened to the song and watched the MTV only two pairings came up in my head. One is SasuSaku and the other is RyoSaku. I don't know if there are already songfics or fanfics with the same plot, title or pairings that I've made but right now I want to share you my idea. Lyrics sung by Avril Lavigne.
Please Read and Review!
BoldItalics – Lyrics
STANDARD DISCLAIMERS APPLIED
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I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cried
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie
Is made up on your side
It has only been months when Echizen Ryoma finally decided to play seriously in the US Open and everyone thought that there's no guarantee of his return when he becomes a champion. Seigaku Tennis Club was doing well in Nationals despite the lack of their small pillar of support. They put in their mind and heart that all their winning streaks won't be theirs alone. It's for the team, for the school, for their friends and for that young man who was fighting alone abroad.
Ryuuzaki Sakuno sat on her chair inside their classroom. She came earlier than expected on that day and it seems like everybody's going to be late. She felt lonely not because her noisy best friend or her classmates weren't around yet but it was because of Ryoma. They didn't really have a kind of bonding that would make them close friends or even lovers but Sakuno always felt secured and inspired when Ryoma's around.
He saved her a lot of times and the first time he became her hero was when they first met. When she thanked him he just shrugged it away as if he did nothing heroic for a damsel-in-distress. Even so, she was thankful no matter how cocky and impassive he seemed to be. She felt that despite his cool and distant behavior he has a heart.
They weren't classmates but they always get together with some of their classmates or more like her friends because Ryoma thinks that he's mature and he's better with his seniors. Sometimes when they eat lunch together, he would most likely take pieces of her lunch than buy something from cafeteria. That not-so small sign gave Sakuno a feeling that somehow Ryoma has noticed her.
When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?
There were also times that they "accidentally" meet at one area where they're both heading home. It was rare but Sakuno treasured those moments with him. He wasn't the talkative type nor was he interested to people blabbering their thoughts out of nowhere so Sakuno practiced patience and silence when he's around. In most unusual occasion he would bring up a topic so suddenly she thought she was hallucinating. It was at that time when he told her that she didn't have to adjust herself. He also told her that she could talk once in a while because it seemed unusual that she wasn't talking.
Sakuno thought that when she tried to talk a lot, Ryoma finds it really unusual so after that she started running away but she just told him that it was nice just walking home with him and silence became a therapy for that day's event. When she smiled at him, Ryoma would smirk at her.
But whenever Ryoma walked to another direction, the one leading to his home, he never waved back at her. He just tells her a short "bye" and then walked off silently. Sakuno didn't move from her spot when he left. She watched him walked slowly away from her. His silence, his warmth, his presence… all was gone when he headed towards that direction. Sometimes she thought how far he walks to his home but she never tried knowing because she was contented when they just walk together in the afternoon.
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it okay
I miss you
From all the things that happened between them, Sakuno felt that her heart finally beats for somehow she liked. There's no mistaking that she liked Ryoma… a lot. Not the point of shrieking his name in every game or calling him "Ryoma-sama" everywhere. She simply liked him. And she wanted to be there where he fights alone in a match. She may be his fan, but all she could do was to support him with everything she could. No matter how he battled through his matches, she would be there. She would help him in any way she can. And when all the rough times end, he would stand up victorious then mocks his opponents with a "mada mada dane." What they didn't know that whenever he do that, she felt relieved because even when his body was already sore and had been beaten repeatedly, he was still there—arrogant yet safe as ever.
That's why, today, while she's waiting inside their classroom, her heart felt like sinking. She already missed him that much.
I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do
Reminds me of you
And the clothes you left
They lie on the floor
And they smell just like you
I love the things that you do
When the bell rang for break, Sakuno instinctively walked towards the rooftop with her lunchbox in tow. Nobody noticed her because she went out so quickly. It was as if her feet have a mind of its own when it trudged towards the location. She only woke up from her daydream when she opened the door of the rooftop with a cool breeze passing by her skin. Her twin braids floated momentarily with the wind until it died down. Deciding for a quiet moment for herself, she settled slowly near a wall to shade herself from the afternoon sun.
As she ate her homemade lunch her eyes began to wander in front of her. Whenever Ryoma was missing, she's the one who always find him. It was as if her heart knew where he was all the time. There was once a time when she decided to eat her lunch at the very same place. She was trying to avoid quarreling between her group mates so she decided to eat alone for a while. By the time she walked out of the door, she was surprised to find Ryoma's figure lying comfortably on the floor. His left hand below his head and his signature cap covering his face. Sakuno thought that he might be sleeping but she was also worried if he had taken lunch already.
After some inner battles, she decided to change location so as not to disturb him but before she even steps in he suddenly asked her about her lunch. She told him and then he pulled out his cap from his face before sitting up. He needed not to ask her to sit by him because her legs started walking towards him. It was their first lunch together—alone.
When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it ok
I miss you
Soon her mind wandered again when they accompanied him in the airport for the second time, when he surprised everybody when he suddenly returned to Japan to fight against their captain. They didn't have to give him anything, only good-byes, take cares, and good lucks. It didn't cross her mind to say anything, she just watched him listening to his friends. She never felt so isolated before but she was always too shy to approach in front of everybody. The last time she did they received catcalls and sniggers from the seniors. She didn't want to happen it again and she knew that Ryoma wouldn't like to be embarrassed by the same thing twice. So she quietly watched him from the side as final good-byes where decided.
What he did next truly surprised her. Before he walked farther away, he turned his face to her with a blank look before a smirked cockily. She didn't understand why he did just that but when he finally turned away, she noticed him smiling a bit. It was then she found that even without words coming out from his sharp tongue he was still teasing her and somewhat, awkwardly, telling her something she still couldn't comprehend. It should be predicted for Ryoma was sometimes unpredictable that made her hard to read. Unlike him, however, she was easy to read. She wondered if Ryoma had read her gestures that time. He seemed so confident and childish.
We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were
Yeah, yeah
And all I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I do I give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me
Yeah
Sakuno always dreamed of him as her prince-- always there to save her, to teach her and to make her happy. But his sarcasm and arrogant personality contradicted her dreams. Also his mind was set for his career, yes, even at young age, he already have a goal to achieve. Even then, even with his awkwardly cute personality, she liked him and she still believed in him. In fact, he did save her a lot of times. He told her advices for tennis and just being with him made her really happy. It may not look like a fairytale romance, but it surely made her heart beat for him.
Now if only he knows how to respond…
She tried more than once to give him hints, to save him but he turned her down because he wanted to show everybody that he could stand on his own. She remembered the time when his eyes bled while everybody's aghast she courageously jumped from the crowd to help him. Sakuno was simply worried and horrified at the same time and even he was surprised from her when she tried to help him.
The other one was when he was still undecided for the US Open. He may have snapped at her but she knew that he had a problem and was trying to solve it on his own. Then again, she just wanted to help him.
They were just little things to make him feel that she certainly was supporting and believing in him and her little actions were resulted from care and love because she liked him.
No, not just "like" or a "crush"….
Her heart learned to love.
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear will always get me through the day
And make it ok
I miss you
Today's class ended uneventfully. She attended her club practice but forgotten to pour her heart on every swing of her racket. Her mind still lost in daydream along with her heart seeking for the prince. She was unmindful of her sweating, of her tired body, of the other girls' yells, of her captain's orders and the hours she spent during the practice. Later, she found herself dressed in her daily uniform while trudging the path towards the boys' tennis courts. They members were long gone for tomorrow's match and no matter what happens, with or without Ryoma; she would be there to support the team.
She shook her head to wake her daydreaming state to notice that her grandma has already left earlier. Now she must walk home alone. Sighing at her untactful situation, she slowly walked out of the courts and onto the gates of the school. Again, she let her mind drifted to dreamland but also tried to fight off sad thoughts that mingled with it. She thought that she should move on soon before she wallow herself in self-pity. Unpredictably, her klutziness finally stopped her from arguing herself when crossed her feet and fell onto the ground.
"Ittai…" (Ouch or that hurts) Sakura pulled her knees to check if she got new bunch of bruises or scratches.
Luckily, her knees were alright although it was covered by dust and dirt that she has to brush off while she rises.
"When walking, try to keep your head on the road."
Sakuno stood frigid in that instant.
"Hips still wobbly."
Her heart felt like jumping out of ribcage and it seemed as though she could hear it beating in her ears. That certainly was…
"And hair still too long. You should cut it."
Her lips quivered a bit and she tried her best to fight tears in her eyes. She was standing in front of him, her back facing him so she knows that he's unaware of her state. Maybe he knew that he surprised her, of all people at this time…
After wiping her tears and taking a deep breath, Sakuno turned around and responded with her usual rebuttal statement. "What does my hair have to do with anything?" She was red in the face, she could tell. She could feel it.
Echizen Ryoma, champion from US Open, has returned that day and was raising an amused brow at her. He wore his casual attire and his signature cap. His tennis bag hanging over his shoulder and his other hand was, as always, on his pocket.
There was a moment of silence in which Sakuno courageously stared at him. He didn't change that much, he was gone for weeks or months even, but she felt like he had grown stronger. His aura glazed with victory and experience from his matches. But she was hoping that he didn't change that much. She missed the Echizen Ryoma who she first met at a train station.
She was so busy gazing at his eyes that she didn't notice him coming to her.
"Let's go, Ryuuzaki." He suddenly said when he looked at her for a moment before walking past her.
It alerted her when he talked to her with that proximity but it alerted her more when he asked her to come.
"Go where?"
He stopped walking to turn his face to her. "Walking home."
Sakuno bit her lip before nodding at him.
I missed him but he was never gone.
END