[Inspired by my own facebook page, got me wondering how it would be for Sasuke xD]
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Sasuke groaned as he logged on to his facebook profile page. He had only signed up for this darned website because Naruto had egged him on and somehow he had made a stupid account. Funnily enough, his older brother and some Uchiha cousins he thought were dead missing were also suggested as his friends. But being reunited with some other Uchihas was about all facebook was good for. He didn't like the 4575867587 friend requests from creepy girls and guys that wanted to be friends with him. He didn't even know them!
At first, Sasuke's profile picture was generic, like the ones that came with the computer, a vine of cherry tomatoes was what it had been, until Naruto had changed it, and then he had been flooded with requests and comments, some really inappropriate. This unsettled him, not to mention, some people he just never saw the same again. One of them was his chemistry teacher, Orochimaru who insisted on liking everypicture Naruto had posted up. It was okay when Sakura or Ino liked a picture and gushed over it (it was weird how they could be loud even whilst typing!) because he was used to it, but Orochimaru… it was just weird.
And some comments of his were just like:
…
hmmm…
nice pic…
hmmm
nice body.
(Officially one of the creepiest comments, so he removed the picture of him taking off his shirt when he scored the winning goal for school)
very nice. …. i like it.
None of his words were capitalized. Ever. Most of it was just ellipses and sometimes there were no comments, but everything Sasuke ever posted or commented, it was liked by Orochimaru.
This was annoying, but thankfully, his brother had noticed it and was sorting it out. Itachi tended to poke him obnoxiously via facebook but Sasuke could definitely count on his older brother to protect him from online predators (besides, Itachi had no right to make fun of Sasuke's page when his own was flooded with farmville requests from Shisui).
He ignored another event that Ino had sent him and continued scrolling, checking for anything worthwhile, but as usual, found nothing funny. There were the usual people, complaining about homework and exams (Sakura and Naruto), posting pictures of food (Chouji, Naruto and Kiba) or drunken nights out (Jiraiya, Tsunade and Anko — they shouldn't be allowed to teach) and rejected all the spam Ino had sent him about asking him out. For the last time, just because his relationship status was set to single, didn't mean that she ought to hound him!
He found out Orochimaru had changed his status to 'It's complicated' and underneath someone had wrote:
It's not complicated, it's illegal.
Sasuke quickly scrolled past that and found a weird post from Naruto:
when people say goodnight dont let the bedbugs bite am like what kind of bed do you sleep on lol!?
He felt the urge to correct his grammar and capitalization but didn't because it would waste too much time and continued scrolling until he saw that he had been tagged in a picture with his brother. It wasn't the picture that was bothering him, it was the comments underneath.
Awww… my boys look so lovely! ❤❤ (3 likes)
As expected of my sons. (1 like)
Omg! What a hunk! (34 likes)
BWAHAHA! Found someone girlier than you, teme! Who is that, your older sister?! (56 likes) Kyaa! Sasuke-Kun, is that really your older brother? I've requested him as a friend. ;D Aww you two look adorable! (3 likes)
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm…. nice pic
You two look like dorks, un. (6 likes)
Sasuke untagged himself from the picture and changed his privacy settings again.