Howdy! This is my first ever Fanfic...Ever! This is a slash Dip two-parter.
Hopefully this will turn into a little series of short stories that revolve around this Odd-couple.
SUMMERY: This is based on Pip's Birthday and Damien wants to get his boyfriend something special.
RATING: M - Purely on the 2nd part, purely because of the presence of Style, Bunny and Fatas- I mean Cartman.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own South Park, but if I did, I'd bring back Bradley, just to see what happens between him and Butters :)
*BTW- If you don't like slash fics, and/or is homophobic. Then Leave.*
The Brooding and The Brit: Happy Birthday, Pip. Part 1.
Man, Pip was excited. It was his birthday and he had a party to set up. Everybody was there, which was strange, most of the guests hated him for ages, well...until Damien Thorn started dating them. He soon made friends.
DING DONG! rang the bell. Outside waiting was none other than Damien Thorn, The Son Of Satan, The Anti-Christ.
Not only was it Pip's Birthday, it was also Pip and Damien's Anniversary, so naturally, Damien had to get a really great present. Choosing a present for a gentlemanly British queer was hard, and Damien knew it. There was only one option... Satan.
*FLASHBACK*
Damien made the way down to hell a day before the party, and he wasn't really ready. You see, although Satan has been openly gay for forever, Damien was still in the closet, the darkest, most evil closet in existence... at least to his father.
He rang the doorbell, and he could hear a faint sound of music from the kitchen. He could just make it out, it's "Flashdance...(What a feeling)". The door opens and Satan is there, with a apron on, with the quote "Kiss the queer" on it.
"Oh Hi, Damien! Nice to see you! You round for dinner?" He asked, hugging his son tightly. "Erm... sure. Can you let go?" He stuttered as he tried to push his dad off. He walked through the kitchen and looked at the table, he saw the CD that his dad had put on, 'Greatest 80's hits', he smiled and placed it down. "So... what brings you here, Damien?" His father asked "Not for money, I hope" He laughed, it was more of a loud cough, but them's the breaks. "Erm...no, I need some advice" he said, catching his fathers advice. "Well, okay... let's go sit in the front room." and so they did.
"So what is it that you want to ask?" Satan asked, whist sipping on a cup of tea. "I hope you haven't done anything good!". "No...erm... Well... I have a problem." Damien sighs, he looks at his father who is still sipping his tea. "Well...?" Satan asks... "There's somebody I like... and it's their birthday, and I don't know what to get them..." Satan puts his cup down and leans forward. "Now listen, Damien. I'm not very good at advise regarding to the ladies." "It's not a girl..." Damien says, looking anxious.
His Father is speechless, "Son, you're...gay?" He asks, Damien puts his head down. "Erm, yeah..." Satan sat there, motionless...until... "Oh My God! This is so totally awesome!" Satan shrieked, nearly giving Damien a heart attack. "I knew it!" Drawing out 'knew' very slowly. "So... what's his name?" "Well..." "No! Let me guess... Stan! That's it, Stan Marsh!" He said joyfully, but Damien shook his head, "Nope, not Stan Marsh. He's off with that Jewish kid, Kyle." Satan sat down, his hand on his goatee, which he was growing for his biker boyfriend, Mitch. "Well... if it isn't Stan or Kyle, then how about Butters?" Damien shook his head again. "Nope. Butters is with Kenny." Satan looked bemused by this, "I always thought Kenny as a bit of a womanizer." "Well, he's bisexual, but he's hooked up with Butters, they've been together for a while now." Damien said, quite amused at his father's attempts of finding out. "Well, with Kenny dying most of the time, it must have a bit of a bad effect on Butters, you know. He must be traumatized." "Well, he used to be, but he's used to it, I mean, Kenny comes back the next day. But I guess it must be upsetting knowing that most of the time, he's sharing a bed with the love of his life, then just for one night, he's alone." said Damien with a sad tone to his voice. "Yeah, that must be terrible." Satan said. "Well... Who is then?". Damien sighed, "It's Pip."
"Pip? That British kid?" Satan said, with a bit of grin on his face. "Yeah, Pip..." Damien said, putting his head on his hand, leaning it on his knee. "Aww, that is so cute!" Satan shouted ecstatically. Damien flushed fire red, he buried his face in his hands and he felt like leaving due to the overpowering embarrassment. "Dad, I...uh...I gotta go." "No! I have to take you shopping!" Satan shouted. "Oh no, I'm going to go shopping with my ultra-camp father for a gift for my boyfriend. How original" He thought as he said "Okay, fine."
They began walking around Hell's renowned shopping mall, Damien had his hands in his pockets trying to conceal his embarrassment, while Satan was being his normal. camp self. What made things worse was the random people that we bumped into at the mall, and Satan HAD to know all of them... well he is the ruler of hell.
"Hey, Grancor! Have you lose weight?" "No, Satan, just decided to change my shirt for today!" Said Grancor, wearing a flowery yellow shirt. "Oh Joy, I just love your style!" "Thank God, he was gone" Damien thought as Satan did a sudden turn towards him. "Did you just think of God?" He asked loudly. Damien Put his hands above his head "No! I didn't I swear!" Satan looked around him, and all the demons that were staring at him. "Oh, Jolly God... I mean GOOD!" He stammered, walking off quite faster, leaving Damien behind. "Come On, Damien!" He shouts from the clothes shop which he stopped at. Damien, began walking faster and met his Dad in front of the shop.
After 10 minutes, they were still looking at the shirt section. Satan was shoving shirts at Damien by the millions, literally. "How about this? This? That? This?" Satan asked, over and over again. Damien shook his head to all of them. "Damien..." Satan sighed "What kind of clothes does he wear?" Damien thought about that, he remembers him wearing Preppy clothes most of time... the rest of the time he's either naked or wearing that Metallica shirt he got him. "Well, he's sorta... preppy..." He says, rather unsurely. Satan smiles brightly as he pulls out a Wooly Jumper-Shirt combination. "Now this is ad-orrrrr-able" handing it to Damien. "Wow! This is preppy, a bit too preppy." He says, while his Dad's face turned from Expectant to disappointment. "Well, I was just thinking, he likes preppy stuff sure, but he wears that all the time. If it's gotta be special, it's gotta be something I gave him, as a symbol of our love...or whatever..." Damien suggested, regretting mentioning the love.
"Well, what do you have in mind?" Satan asks. "Well..." Damien says, looking at the jewelry across the road.
*FLASHFORWARD*
DING DONG! The doorbell rings. "Oh, another guest! Jolly Good!" Pip exclaims. He prances to the door in a feminine manner. "I hope it's Damien, I do love him so." He thinks to himself. He opens the door and there he is, Damien Thorn, The Son of Satan.
"Damien! Thank you so much for coming!" He says whilst almost strangling him with a loving hug. He kisses his cheek, causing Damien's cheeks to go fire red once more.
"Here's your present, Pip." Damien acting unnaturally shy, especially in front of Pip.
Pip slowly unwraps the present... "Oh Damien... I...I...".
Ooooooo! What did he buy, and what did Pip think of it? Well, you'll find out on the next part. Hopefully.
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