Discovering Regret
BY: pottersweetie
Author's Note: It's been waaaaay to long since I've even thought about Peter Pan. It's been about Harry Potter for awhile and now I've realized I need my Peter again! Not that you care! Lol. I got this idea when I was rereading my old Peter Pan fic. Hope you like it! Enjoy, Read, Review!
Chapter One
Remembering Peter
I had grown up. The fact that Peter wasn't coming back slowly sunk in and I stopped waiting for him, and I didn't keep the window open anymore. Not that I had a choice anyway because Mother and Father sold the house and not long after I decided I would have to forget him and become a grown-up.
Well children take one last look at the house because after this we're off, father said to us, going to the new-fashioned car to prepare our departure. I looked up at the house, the big empty home, that I'd known my whole life. John and Michael were playing, not even caring about the fact that we were leaving our home. I could see the window, the stained-glass window that Peter had flown through, it looked so haunting and creepy without the friendly curtains hanging from the top of it. All right, everybody in, we're going to the new house! father said cheerfully, John and Michael hurried towards the car but I hung back. Wendy, dear, come along, Mother called, and with one last longing glance at my home I turned and left.
I automatically smile warmly at the old couple and bow my head lightly, presenting them with a small curtsey. Mr. Perry gives a half bow while Mrs. Perry lowers herself somewhat into a curtsey as well.
Lovely to meet you, I say gently.
The pleasure is ours, Mr. Perry has a warm face, weathered, yet friendly, kind of like how Grandfather's had been; that is how I wish father would look, old and friendly, but he's not, he's just old and stern.
Daniel has talked so fondly of you, he sends Daniel, who looks like an embarrassed school boy, a knowing glance. I'm glad to finally meet the woman he doesn't keep quiet about, he laughs with a good nature.
I laugh softly, and my eyes advert to Daniel. Daniel Shaw. My fiancé. Mother and Father adore Daniel, right down to what kind of shoe polish he uses. He's the son of Stephen Shaw, the owner of Bert & Shaw Banking, so naturally Father's smitten with every Shaw he meets.
Don't tell her everything I say, Daniel grins. She might begin to think highly of herself, he jokes.
His black hair is neat and combed, his steel-gray eyes are set behind his round glasses, although he's laughing and joking on the outside his eyes are always serious. Now that I think about it, he looks a little bit like Father.
I laugh again, We wouldn't want that now, would we? I joke with them, for if I seem normal they won't know what I'm thinking.
Never, especially when my Wendy's so humble, he kisses my forehead softly.
No wonder Father and Mother like Daniel so much, he's wealthy, supportive, solid, and predictable... I like that.
After a few moments of joking and laughing with Mr. and Mrs. Perry, Daniel announces he has to introduce them to someone else.
Will you be all right by yourself? he asks, quickly turning to me before he walks off.
I put on a reassuring smile, Of course, darling. I was thinking about stepping outside for a bit of fresh air anyway, I find myself telling him.
You're sure? he asks again, as if the second he walks away I'll be snatched up by some unsuspecting villain.
I laugh, Yes, I'll be fine.All right, I'll only be a moment, and he disappears into the crowd.
I walk around Miss Amelia Walter's monthly dinner party, we've already had dinner so I can mingle for the rest of the evening until Daniel says when to leave.
I avoid almost anyone who looks like they'd like to have a nice little chat with me about the wedding plans and hurry toward the exit.
Soon I find myself in a great big lush garden. With hedges shaped as swans, fountains of little angels spouting water into the air, and beautifully groomed flowers crawling along the walkway.
It's almost May but the night air still has a slight chill to it. I make my way to the fountain and gaze into the waters of the surrounding pond, then look up at the clear, night sky. The stars are scattered along the sky, but at the same time they seem so close together, maybe it's their size, the seem closer tonight.
As I stare up at the pitch sky I see a distant star wink at me.
Peter Pan.
As the name fills my mind, I almost grow dizzy. It's been years since I've thought about him, not since I was 13 or 14, and now at age 23 the name sends my thoughts whirring. I shiver as I look into the empty garden, what made me think of that name? Was it the swan-shaped hedges, the water plopping into the pound, or was it the winking star?
Whatever it was it sent chills up my spine and thoughts whizzing noisily in my head; I don't know if I like it very much either.
I walk, slightly unsteadily, to a cold metal bench next to a wall-like hedge. I soon find myself barely shaking, had Peter Pan been real? There was no way of knowing, none of us talked about it anymore. Michael had been so young at the time, I'm sure he would have long forgotten, and John is too busy with finishing school and finding a good, strong career to talk about fairy tales with me, Father would never talk about such nonsense either, and Mother, Mother's memory is deteriorating with age. But the Lost Boys... Long after they came to stay with us we never really discussed their origin, surely they hadn't just appeared on our doorstep.
As I sit in the cold evening air, insane thoughts continue playing in my head.
What if I had just thought up Peter Pan, maybe there was a clear and logical explanation for it all but it had just not revealed itself to me.
I look up to see Daniel walking out to where I'm sitting. Wendy are you all right? You look ill?
Quickly, I stand up and put on a bright smile, I'm great, I must look a bit odd in the moonlight, I force myself to smile.
I think you look beautiful in the moonlight, and he kisses me.
For some reason I pull away sooner than usual.
Actually, now that you've mentioned it, I am feeling a little off, would you mind very much if I went home early?Not at all, he looks worried and automatically I feel guilty about lying. If you're not feeling well I'll be happy to take you home- I say almost too quickly. No, I don't want you to leave the party on my account, especially when it's so early into the night, I say hastily. No it's fine I'll go home and have Sophia help me set up a nice warm bath for myself, that's probably all I need.I'll have my driver take you home, he offers.
I say slowly. That'll be fine.
Any way to get home.
As he leads me out of the garden I begin thinking about Peter again. Was he real? Surely one of the boys will know, I'll just have to pay Slightly a little visit tomorrow.
...
Not long after I was finally home and Sophia was asking me for anything and everything. When Daniel and I had been seeing each other for awhile and he found out I was living all by myself in a big house he hired Sophia Price for me. She helps me around the house and checks on my every needs. I don't like it so much though so I told her to relax a bit about it.
So naturally when I walked through the door she asked me if I was hungry, if I needed a drink, if I wanted a pair of slippers, on and on and on. I told her I was fine and I was just tired.
But as soon as I was in my room, and dressed in my nightgown I asked if she could get me some paper and a pen.
I sit down at my desk, all the lamps are turned off except one single candle that is slowly melting next to me. I grip the pen in my hand and so many memories come flooding back to me. There was no way Peter Pan could've been in my imagination alone. After all that had happened, everything we had been through.
I looked up at Peter but he said nothing. The Lost Boys, John, and Michael all stared at us quietly. I didn't know what to say at the time, I wasn't able to form words that seemed right but I tried my best. I began tentatively. Peter, just because we're leaving doesn't mean we'll never see you again. He looked up at me, his eyes looked so hollow. I don't care! he shouted and I flinched, as did the rest of the boys. I said softly. Just leave I don't care! and he hurried out of the tree house.
I stare at the flame, burning at the tip of the wick, the flame leans toward me and I was almost sure a gust of wind had passed through the room but the window was closed.
And now my mind wanders, had Peter come back? just like he promised?
Now I can feel my heart sinking, it wouldn't matter if Peter had come back because he would still just be a boy and I had to admit, I still had a certain place in my heart where I loved Peter.
I set down the pen and get into bed, blowing out the candle. Maybe Peter Pan wasn't real or maybe I had gone mad... Whatever it was I was bound to find out soon.
Author's Note: Okay I haven't written a Peter Pan story in a LOOOONG time so please forgive me if it seems a little off... Anywho... Hope you liked it! If you did, review, if you didn't, use your flame idea to roast a chicken. Winks Thanks for reading! Next chapter'll be up soon