A few months ago, a had to write a parody of an Edgar Allen Poe piece. Now I just randomly decided to upload it. Bear in mind that I was just barely 14 when I wrote this and I am already noticing the quality of my writing still needed some work to do. Review please!
Ehmagawd. I know what your thinking. You think me mad. I can totally understand that, but you need to hear me out. What happened that fateful night will never be lived down. I can't believe I have the sanity left to tell you. But I do. Just don't tell my sister.
I really don't see why I did it in the first place. I had nothing against her. Not really. Okay, yes. Yes, I did. I think it was her handbag. Yea! That's it! It was her handbag. Not just any handbag, no no. It was a one-of-a-kind hybrid Channel-Gucci handbag. And... it wasn't a knockoff. That was officially the last straw. Totally reasonable now, right?
There wasn't really anything I could do. It tortured me though. The handbag. The handbag tortured me. Every time she passed with it, the infamous logo keychains chimed and chaned here and there. It was as if they were purposefully taunting me. But you want to know the worst part of it all? The absolute worst part of it all? The worst part of it all, was the fact that she only acquired that handbag because of the shiny, platinum card she owned. If I could be so lucky as to... It wasn't fair! It just wasn't right! I couldn't take it any longer! I had to do something. Something quick. Something fast. I had no other choice. For if she attacked again with her whipping that card and claiming another unfortunate luxury, I most likely, most likely I tell you, would not see the morrow.
So I prepared myself. I prepared myself oh so greatly. It was amazing I tell you. What was amazing was that I was able to look her straight in the eye and she wouldn't suspect a thing. She wouldn't suspect the hateful planning that was going through my mind. Oh how grateful I was for that, I cant explain. Because if she saw what was going through my mind, I would be done for. Dead to her I tell you. And I can't have that. I can't have that at all. You see, the thing is I need her. I need her guidance on what is in, and what is out. Really. I just wish oh so greatly that she wouldn't be such a female dog about it! Either way, I was in far or deep. To deep I tell you. The days passed and I was still planning. Still planning to what would eventually lead to that fateful night. That fateful night that would change it all.
I had just finished walking the cat when I walked through that door. The door to my house. I saw then, that it was there. It was actually there. The handbag. The hybrid Channel-Gucci handbag. I couldn't possibly care less for that though. Surprisingly I couldn't. No, what I seized that opportunity for was so that that I could run to the handbag, that handbag I tell you, and rummage through it until I could find it. Until I could find it! And I did. Slowly, I raised the card to eyelevel and studied it closely. Was this the demon after all my sane? Could it really be the mentor teaching the things it purchased to taunt me and drive my mad? It couldn't! But it was. It was all of the above. Undeniably it was.
I had to act with haste. She would be there any minute I presumed. After all, how long could she leave that precious, poor thing behind. Not the handbag dummy, but the card. She couldn't leave it behind for long though. So, I did the only available thing I could do. What I did was take the card and slide it through the floorboards. Hey! Don't judge me! What else could I do? Not much, considering the circumstances. Anyway, after that I stood there, dumbfounded, letting my actions catch up with my mind. Once I realized what exactly I did, I yelped. Did I actually do that? Did I seriously do that? I did didn't I?
It wasn't long after that that I then rejoiced! No more torturing purchases! No more stinking purchases that laughed at my juvenile wardrobe and accessories. Yippee! Then it happened. She came back. I stopped myself and looked her, again, straight in the eye and she, again, suspected nothing. I was safe.
She came home crying that afternoon. Home from that shoppingless shopping spree. She was hysterical. She came to me asking if I had seen her Visa. No I answered. It was almost hard not to smirk. But I didn't. I couldn't. She shrieked again and ran upstairs bawling her eyes out. Yippee.
I was celebrating, still, when I heard it.
Ziiieeep.
What was that?
Ziiieeep!
I shrugged that off. Surely it was just my imagination. Surely it was merely a figment of my imagination.
Ziiieep!
An awfully loud figment of my imagination. An eerie, strangely familiar sound. Then she came back. my sister did. She blankly told me how she would never shop again. Not without Visa. Not without her old, loyal friend. She just couldn't.
Ziiieep.
I tried to compose myself. Hadn't she heard it also? How could she not? It was so loud! Oh so very loud!
She rambled on and on about poor, misplaced Visa when that fateful noise came again.
Ziiieep!
I knew what it was now. It was the sound Visa used to make when she swiped herself along that infamous machine. But how could it be? It had been days since I rid myself of her. How could it possibly be?
Ziieep!
Ziieep!
Ziiep!
Stop it! Stop it, I had screamed in my mind. I couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't take the unusual feeling welling up inside me. Could it be? Could it be... Guilt.
Rambling on she continued about Visa.
Ziieep!
Ziieep!
"That's it! I can't bear this any longer! Take it! Take the stupid card. It's under the floorboards! Take it! Just take it! But don't ask me for help. I'm going out. I'm...I'm...I'm... going out to walk the cat."
I wrote this all in less than an hour noting that it was easier to write the more I knew the format of A Tell-Tale Heart.