Waiting
A Blackwater Drabble

"I've been waiting,
I've been waiting for this moment all my life,
but it's not quite right."

I've been waiting.

I've been waiting for this moment all my life.

You could cross the space between us in an instant – it's just one step. You're in a rage, angry about something I can't even remember any more, though you're still yelling about it, and you're bare-foot and bare-chested as always, just a pair of torn cut-offs keeping me from seeing all of you, and you're breathing hard, so very hard, and I can see the muscles of your chest heaving with each lungful of air. The sweat is glistening on your bronze skin, and the heat between us is so immense I think I can see a haze in the air around us as it evaporates.

It'd be so easy. So easy.

We belong together, you see. I've known it since I was seventeen. You were fourteen. I was sitting on the back porch watching the rain through eyes wet with angry tears. You were coming to see my brother, but you sat on the porch with me all evening and well into the night, and no one knew you were there but me. You said it was stupid of me to get so angry, it just let the other person win.

Or maybe I didn't know it, not until just recently, but that's the reason why, when I say I love you in the silent chambers of my heart, I know its true.

But you're getting angry now. So angry you don't see my tongue moistening my lips in anticipation, my body leaning towards you maybe just a little more than a Beta's should. You don't see anything but the red haze of anger that fogs what should be so obvious, if only you were looking.

Dimly, I wonder what has you so put out this time. Something to do with Bella, certainly. The little whore. I don't know why you bother with her. She likes her guys cold and stiff and stand-offish and Byronic – and nothing short of a stint in a deep freezer and a time machine is going to make you anything close to that.

I've known you all our lives. You're passionate and emotional and prone to bouts of inexplicable anger and light-heartedness. You can be kind and caring and are the best Alpha there ever was. You can be rude and cruel and downright animalistic in your fury. You'd fight to the death for anyone you care about and would die before hurting someone you loved.

You can't hurt me, you know. I heal fast. I can roll with the punches and give more than my share in return. You know this. I've yelled at you when you're being an idiot. I've talked sense into you when you've lost it. And yet...

And yet here we are again, and you look so fucking fuckable right now, and all you need to do is cross the hairsbreadth between us so we'll be touching, and lower you head just the smallest amount... If you just looked you'd see how bare I am as well, what little I'm wearing and what else I obviously aren't. It would be so easy...

I could do it.

But I won't. Not until I know how you feel. I couldn't take the pain of your rejection. I'd rather dream this impossible dream forever than have it broken once and for all.

So I wait. I wait for you to see across what might as well be oceans in between us and teach me the taste of your mouth, the sweetness of your breath as it mingles with mine. You'll realize you love me too, someday, that Bella was just this phase, and that we're so perfectly right for each other that it borders on ridiculous. You have to. I've waited years for you. I'm not ageing, I'm in no hurry.

I'll wait for you all my life.

"Everyone's so intimately rearranged.
Everyone can focus clearly with such shine.
Lost and loaded, still the same 'ol decent lazy eye
straight through your gaze. That's why I said I relate.
I said we relate. It's so fun to relate."

Silversun Pickups "Lazy Eye"

a/n: Yes, another drabble, because Luci-Marlena posted "Try" and I wasn't going to let her win this round of the War of the Onesies. I forget exactly what in it made me think of this (I got the idea while reading it...) oh yes, the tell me you love me part, which reminded me of Tell Me You Love Me, Junie Moon, a play my high school preformed my freshman year - very interesting to see plays preformed by all-female actors, I must add - but I couldn't find any good way to bring that in, and I'm slighly addicted to Silversun Pickups.

So, ha. Ha, Luci. Ha. And thanks to all my reviewers who seem to like these things I write in 60 min and post just because. And to all those people who have made it so "Modern Warfare" has 500 reveiws... and to everyone else involved in the Write Blackwater project...