Author's Note: Some time ago, I've read a story here, in LOTR section, about Gimli and Legolas. You will find that story in my favorites. It inspired me to write my own version for Fili and Kili. Some lines and situations are similar to the original story, so if you don't like it, I apologize. That's why I am telling you about the original one-shot called "Chain Reaction" by The Yuggster, I highly recommend it.
Anyway, I would like to show you my writing. I have never posted here before. And it's my first fanfic written in language different than my native one, ever! So, if you see any errors and mistakes, please let me know immediately. Any suggestions would also be appreciated. Thank you!
DISCLAIMER: I don't own the characters, everything belongs to mighty J. R. R. Tolkien! And the original story belongs to The Yuggster!
There's no reaction without an action. And Fili and Kili know it now too well...
One day there was an action…
"Mahal… it's so boring!"
"Kili, please, my poor ears! Stop complaining now!"
"But Fili, it is! It's already afternoon and I'm bored! And your ears are still perfectly fine to me!"
To every dwarf and every human living in Ered Luin, it was a day like another. They were enjoying their free time or training together with their chosen weapons, or working and trading in the market. Nothing wrong could happen on that day, nothing unexpected to anyone. Or so it seemed. For the young dwarf siblings were sitting in front of their home completely bored.
How could they ever be bored? Normally they would go somewhere, or play together, train, work in the forge with their uncle, or help their mother, or think about jokes they did and plan next pranks they could pull. They were always together and boredom very, very rarely met them. But today was different and Kili had no idea why.
"Then go, take your bow and arrows, and do some shooting!" Fili suggested.
If possible, Kili complained even more. "But I did it in the morning!"
"Then train with your sword."
"I'm too tired to even hold it…"
"Kili, please! Just think about something you could do and stop complaining!"
"But I have no idea what I could do today! Every day is the same! It is so normal! And nothing interesting is happening!"
Fili groaned. He too was extremely bored, but didn't want to admit it to his younger brother. He and boredom? Never! So, he did the only thing he could do to make the time pass by a bit faster.
"Fine! Come with me," he stood up and started walking away.
"Where?" Kili's face brightened up and he too stood up and followed his brother.
"How about a little competition?" Fili smirked. "If your arm really hurts, I will easily beat you in shooting!"
"What? You really believe you can beat me in archery? No way, Fili!"
And their little competition started. Of course, Kili was winning easily, but it didn't really matter to Fili, as long as his younger brother wasn't complaining about being bored. They spent their time shooting in the woods, but their fun ended as quick as it came. They were about to go back to their home, when suddenly Kili spotted a pheasant sitting on a tree in front of them.
"I bet you won't shoot that bird, Fili! Let's see who wins!" he said and prepared to shoot the animal. Fili did the same.
"Don't be so sure, Kili! The prize is mine!"
As Kili was about to let his arrow fly and kill, the bird disappeared. Fili instantly spotted it sitting on another tree. He moved and prepared to shoot, but again the same thing happened. They chased the bird and eventually came to the end of the forest while the bird was flying away quickly from them and in the direction of their home. Fili prepared to shoot when suddenly Kili slipped behind him and fired his arrow accidentally.
"Ow, Fili! That was unfair!" Kili argued while standing up.
"But I'm here, Kili," Fili answered slowly. "I wasn't behind you..." he then heard something and looked up. "Kili! You actually shoot that pheasant, look!"
Kili looked up. "It's… it's falling to…!" he observed alarmed, but suddenly a loud crash! of broken glass could be heard.
Brothers looked at each other and ran to find Kili's prey. They halted in front of their home only to see that the front window was broken and many small pieces of glass were lying everywhere.
"Well, thank Mahal that mum and uncle are not home…" sighed Fili and went inside, Kili following him.
The pheasant was lying dead on the floor in front of the kitchen. But there was no sign of arrow. Kili went to check the window in the kitchen while Fili picked Kili's prize up and examined it.
"Uh… Fili?" Kili started unsure. "We have a little problem here…"
"It's only a window, Kili, we will repair it. But you won our competition! Your shoot was amazing, even if accidental."
"Ahh forget about competition! Come quickly and see!" he shouted.
And first reaction…
"Well… that could've been worse…" Fili commented trying to hide a little smirk when he looked at his brother's pained face.
The kitchen was in a mess. It seemed that the falling bird broke the window and hit the shelf with dishes, which fell and crashed on the floor. The bird was like a bullet: it bounced from the shelf, knocked a vase from another shelf, and ended up in front of the kitchen. The vase hit some other things before they all fell and shattered on the floor. But it was not the worst. The bird somehow must have been still alive when it hit the window. It couldn't control its flight, though. It fell to the floor and rolled from the room after hitting food and jars in small pantry. These, of course, were now destroyed, jam splashed on the floor and food lying everywhere.
"Who would have thought? Small pheasant and such a disaster?" Fili was desperately trying not to laugh.
"It's not funny! I am dead now! Mum will surely kill me, again!"
"You will live, Kili…"
"I am not going to make it this time!"
"But you are invincible!" Fili laughed. "Remember all these times when…?"
"That was nothing compared to this!" Kili threw his arms up, panicked. He forgot about his prize and quickly started cleaning. "Are you going to help me or not?! We don't have time!"
"We? It's your mess, brother. I have nothing to do with it. And, remember, you have to tell mum." Fili just loved annoying his brother.
"What?!" Kili argued angrily. "But it was your idea with the competition! It is your fault!"
"My fault that you slipped? You should've learned by this time how to run properly, don't you think? Mum would want to know what happened, Kili. I am going to find her now." Fili started walking away.
Kili quickly stood in front of his brother. "You will regret this. I will make you pay!" Kili dared him furiously.
"Make me, then! I want to see this!" Fili answered amused.
But Kili was already forming a plan in his head and Fili failed to see that. They stood in silence, looking at each other.
"You will tell mum that you made this mess here." Kili decided.
"What? I will not lie to her! Why would I do it?"
"Because if you don't, I'll tell uncle that it was you who poured that pink dye into his hair shampoo. He still didn't find out who pulled that prank on him and now he will learn the truth!" Kili grinned deviously, satisfied with his idea.
"But it is not the truth and we both know this, brother!" Fili said shocked.
"But uncle does not."
"Don't you dare…!"
"So, what do you choose, Fee?" Kili was now smirking more devilly. Oh, revenge was sweet.
"It is not fair! Try to do this or I will…" Fili began.
"You will what? You can't do anything, there are no more pranks or crimes you can make me responsible for."
Fili was trapped. He didn't even know when this conversation turned against him. And when did his brother become so cunning? Fili didn't have a choice.
"You little… traitor!" Fili was red with anger, but Kili's smile only grew wider.
"So, let's confess now, shall we?" he started moving towards Fili to grab him, but suddenly they heard the front door opening.
"Fili? Kili? Are you here?"
They immediately recognized the voice of their uncle and started cleaning the mess, afraid. It wasn't exactly cleaning now. They threw the broken glass out of the window, moved some pieces under the table and stood in the doorway, goofy and faked smiles on their faces.
"Hey uncle!"
"You had a nice day?"
"How was work today?" they started distracting him while praying silently for help. They didn't want Thorin to see what really happened in their home. Not now. And they didn't know what was worse: the wrath of their uncle, or the wrath of their mother?
"Fine, I guess…" Thorin looked at them intently. "Now don't tell me, that…"
"No no! It's not that, uncle!" Kili interrupted quickly.
"Everything is almost perfectly normal!"
"There was just a little accident, but we are working on it already!" Kili finished, not really thinking what he was saying. Fili looked at him, his eyes wide, before they both realized their mistakes.
"Well, lads, I can see that. Who wants to explain to me why that window is destroyed?" Thorin asked his nephews, pointing to the window in front of their home. "And quickly, before your mother comes back, unless you want to face her by yourselves."
Brothers looked down thinking what to do. No one wanted to face the wrath of Dis. She was known for her outbursts and even mighty Thorin was sometimes afraid of his little sister's anger.
Kili saw the opportunity in this uncomfortable situation and quickly pushed his frowning brother forward. "Actually, uncle, Fili would gladly explain…" he began slowly.
"What?!" Fili interrupted. Kili raised his eyebrow and looked at his brother knowingly. "I-I mean… fine." Fili rolled his eyes irritated, and explained to Thorin what had happened.
"So, you tell me that you shoot a small pheasant and…?"
"I am sorry, uncle. I wasn't really thinking. I shouldn't have let the arrow fly towards our home. I could've shoot someone and…" Fili said ashamed. Both brothers looked down sadly, waiting for Thorin to explode with anger. What happened next surprised them greatly.
"Well, accidents happen, boys. Let's clean the mess first, shall we?" Thorin offered calmly. "This time I will not tell your mother what really happened. But only this once."
"T-thank you!" Fili answered unsure and looked at Kili. So that's it?
"However, you must do something for me…" Thorin began.
Second…
"I can't believe it came to this. I have to cover up for uncle?! Of all the people?!" Fili moaned. "Can you actually imagine uncle pulling a prank on Balin?"
"No, Fili," Kili laughed trying not to think about what his brother was about to do. "But I understand him. I wouldn't want to be in his shoes now."
"You understand? Why did he do this in the first place?" Fili snorted and shook his head.
"For the same reason we do sometimes?" Kili reasoned.
Fili looked at him thoughtfully. "Yeah, maybe…" he tried to think desperately how to break free from covering up for his uncle. And then it clicked in his mind.
"Fili, why aren't we going? Why did you stop?" Kili asked, but Fili only smiled, not looking away from his younger brother. "Fili, why are you looking at me like this? I-I don't like it!"
"You wouldn't want to be in his shoes now, huh? But you are!" Fili grabbed Kili and started dragging him to Balin's home, not caring if Kili protested or not.
"What? No, I refuse!"
"You can't refuse now, unless you want me to tell uncle the truth about the pheasant." Fili said amused at his squirming brother.
"And what then? He will only think that you are a coward!"
"Then I'll tell him about the dye."
Kili stopped, shocked. "You wouldn't!"
"Try me, then." Fili turned around and started running home. "Uncle!"
"Fili, no, WAIT!" Kili shouted. And Fili obliged.
"You started this, Kili. Now, what do you choose? It's your turn to confess something today, isn't it?"
"Very well." Kili sighed and Fili followed him, happy and excited.
They eventually reached Balin and Dwalin's home and knocked on the door. But no one answered.
"Mister Balin?" Fili tried to check if someone was inside or not. "Is anybody home?"
Just then the door opened to reveal Dwalin. Kili winced.
"Fili, Kili! Good day, lads!" Dwalin patted their shoulders in greeting.
"Yeah, very good indeed!" Fili smiled. "Is Mister Balin home?"
"I'm afraid not, he went to the market. He should be back soon. Do you want to wait for him here?" he offered, smile never leaving his face.
"Well, actually, we can come here later…" Kili wanted to get away, but Fili grabbed him by his tunic.
"What my brother really means," he began. "is that we would really like to wait, if it's not a problem."
"Of course not! Come in!" and Dwalin disappeared inside. Kili was angry now and didn't move at all.
"Kili, Kili, Kili. The sooner you confess, the better. We don't want it to wait any longer, do we?" Fili smirked and pushed Kili forward.
"I'm going to kill you," he groaned.
"Very well, but later, would you consider this? There is more important thing to do right now than killing me." Fili mocked him, enjoying this so much. Oh yes, he was going to have fun.
They weren't talking and drinking ale with Dwalin for long, before Balin came back. Dwalin then excused himself and went back to his forge to finish work, while Balin asked Kili about what he wanted to tell him.
"Well, the thing is, that… " he began unsure and ashamed. And he shouldn't be ashamed for something he didn't even do! It felt weird to him. Well, I guess I'm a better liar than I thought.
"Yes?" Balin listened.
So Kili started to speak. "Do you… do you remember that little incident with pepper?"
"What are you talking about, lad?" Balin was now confused.
"The pepper in your pipe. I was the one who put the pepper in it instead of pipe-weed. It was stupid joke, I know, but… When I saw your pipe lying empty in your and Dwalin's forge, I kind of… couldn't resist," he finished even more ashamed than before.
"Ahh, I remember now that little incident, Kili. But, tell me, are you sure it was my pipe?" Balin asked mischievously.
Fili and Kili looked at each other, eyebrows raised. Kili described the pipe just like Thorin did earlier, hoping that Balin would understand. Kili apologized and waited.
"Well, lad, it is not me you should apologize to." Balin finally said.
"Huh? But-"
"That day I wasn't even working in our forge, Kili."
"So whose pipe was it?" Kili asked. He had a bad feeling about this.
"Dwalin's." Balin admitted. "And, I have to say, his face was priceless, when he told me about that little surprise."
"It.. it was his?" Kili panicked and fell silent. Fili was trying to suppress a giggle, but failed and roared with laughter at the look on his brother's face.
"Aye." Balin confirmed again and giggled. "But he already forgot about it. There's no need to make him remember, I think."
"You… you will not tell him?" Kili asked, not quite believing if he heard what he thought he heard.
"But I have one condition."
Then there was third one…
"Well, brother, that was quite something, don't you think?"
"Shut up, Fee." Kili grabbed his brother by his shoulder and turned him around. "You are going to do this."
"Now, Kee, don't be so stubborn."
"I am not. Unless you want me to tell uncle…"
"Ok, fine! All right! Just… let's get over with this." Fili groaned and walked towards their next destination muttering curses silently.
Kili followed him, giggling like a child. As they had anticipated, Bombur was in his home cooking something and baking a cake. Cooking was what he loved the most, except for eating of course.
"And what do you think, lads? Too much sugar?" he asked them some time later.
"It's delicious!"
"Perfect," brothers agreed and Bombur turned around happily to finish a stew.
"I am glad to hear that you like my cookies. But… you wanted to tell me something, Fili?"
"Aye, well… I don't know where to begin…" Fili didn't feel good. Lying again was not something he liked to do for the rest of the day.
"Out with it, Fili," Kili whispered which only made Fili feel worse.
"Two days ago you left your cake near the window," Fili started unsure. "And I… I am sorry, but I ate it." he finished sheepishly.
"Well, I've always known you two liked cakes." the older dwarf sighed.
Fili looked down at his feet. "But that's no reason to steal food. I am really sorry."
"Don't be, it's just a cake," Bombur said. "I can make another, a better one." He assured.
"If I can somehow make it up for you…" Fili offered, wincing as he did so. He didn't need more trouble today.
"Actually, there's something you could do."
And fourth…
"Uncle's pink hair." Fili sang merrily.
Kili looked at his brother, a puzzled look on his face. "What?"
"You are going to speak to Ori, brother. It's only fair."
Kili sighed. "Why it does not surprise me?" he spotted Ori sitting by the tree and waved to him. "Hey, Ori!"
Fili was surprised. "So, you are not going to protest now?"
"Unlike you, I am not afraid of Ori, Fili!" Kili rolled his eyes.
"Who told you I am afraid of him?" Fili replied incredulously.
"Kili! Fili! It is so nice to meet you today!" Ori came to them and greeted brothers happily. "What are you doing here?"
"Covering up for Bombur?" Fili whispered, but Ori didn't hear him.
"I have to tell you something and I'm afraid you will not like it." Kili said.
"Something happened?"
"Do you remember that book you borrowed to Bombur? The one about cuisine in Erebor?" Kili asked.
"Why, yes, I do." said confused dwarf.
"I was visiting him today and… I accidentally dropped a piece of cake on it. I just came to give it to you back, but…" he gave Ori his book. "I'm sorry, I wasn't careful enough."
"Oh, I see…" Ori saddened. "But it's okay, I forgive you, Kili."
"Really? That's a relief." smiled Kili. "How can I make it up for you?" he asked politely, hoping that Ori will not ask for anything. Fili was listening carefully and before he could say something, Ori did ask shyly.
"Would it be bad if I asked you a favor?"
Fifth reaction in the chain…
"Forget it, brother."
"Pink dye, Fee!" Kili reminded Fili as soon as they were away from Ori.
"So what? Are you going to force me to do what Ori asked you to do? I said: forget it." snarled dwarf. "You will do this, I want this madness to end, before I say Durin."
"But it all started with you, Fili! You wanted competition!" Kili snapped back.
"But you shoot that bird! Time to repair the damage!"
"I would talk to Oin now for you, had you faced Ori. But you didn't, so it's your turn again!" Kili argued stubbornly.
"I will NOT go there! This has to stop now! Why did you agree to help Ori in the first place?"
"Because I didn't have a choice, Fili!"
"I am sorry, I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but…" they heard behind them. "What are you arguing about, lads?"
Fili and Kili turned around to one smiling dwarf with funny hat on his head. "Bofur!" They greeted him happily, plan already forming in their minds...
"Well, that is interesting," commented Bofur after brothers told him about how they didn't want to go to Oin to tell him that they mixed his herbs and misplaced the book about medicines. They knew he was obsessed and, of course, tried to convince Bofur to go there for them. "I would never guess that you are both afraid of him." he mocked.
"We are not!" protested Kili. "Fili is!"
"ME?!"
"Now, now, lads. If you don't want to go there, I can. I was going to visit him today anyway."
"Oh thank Mahal…" Fili sighed with relief.
"You could really do this for us?" Kili asked hopefully.
"Yeah, but," Bofur stopped smiling and became serious.
"There is something we can do for you," the brothers finished simultaneously, moaning, but agreeing. They didn't have any other choice, did they?
And sixth reaction…
"Tell me one thing. Why is this happening to us?" Fili wondered.
"I have no answer to that question," Kili said truthfully. "One harmless lie, and lots of problems..."
"One bird, and such a fuss! I just can't help myself, but wonder if it is some sort of a trick. We should've faced Oin. And now we have to find Gloin…"
Kili shook his head. "We, brother? It was your turn with Oin, you didn't agree, so now it is you who must talk to his brother." he explained.
"I don't like it. I swear, if he too asks us a favor…" Fili cursed which only made Kili laugh.
"Fee, you poor thing…" he mocked. "Ok, go, I'll wait here for you."
Fili stopped going and looked at his brother, groaning and turning red with anger. "Oh no, you're not. You will come with me."
"Afraid to be left alone?"
"And you are enjoying this? We are only wasting time! It's almost evening!"
"Well, we can always go home and tell uncle about that pink dye…" Kili beamed.
Fili stormed away towards Gloin's forge, cursing loudly, Kili running after him with grin plastered to his face. He was clearly enjoying Fili's discomfort far too much.
They finally made it to the forge and looked around. Gloin was having a break, sitting and smoking his pipe.
"Fili and Kili…" he smiled. "How are you today?"
Fili was feeling like he would explode at any second. Kili, however, answered. "Fine, thank you."
"Yeah… very fine…" Fili muttered.
"Is something the matter?"
Before Kili could answer again, Fili quickly started to explain. "We only came to tell you…"
"We?"
"FINE! I came to tell you that I forgot about coming here earlier to help you in the forge." he explained, before he could change his mind.
Gloin raised his eyebrows. "What are you talking about, Fili?" he asked confused. "You didn't have to…"
"I did. Bofur wasn't feeling well this morning and asked me to come here and help you instead of him. He is visiting Oin right now to get some medicines. But anyway, I got distracted by other things…"
"Like eating Bombur's cake…" Kili muttered under his breath.
"…and I forgot." Fili ended quickly, before his brother could humiliate him more. "If you still need some help, I can stay and…"
"No, no, lad, there's no need." Gloin answered. "I didn't know Bofur was sick. I was waiting for him almost whole day and finished the work myself. I shall go to him later, I think."
Kili slapped his brother playfully. "I am sure Fili will come tomorrow and help you properly," he said with huge grin.
Fili glared at Kili, thinking hard. You will so regret all of this, he thought. A mischievous twinkle appeared in his eyes, which didn't go unnoticed by Kili, whose eyes widened with surprise.
"Well, I think we will go back home now…" he turned around and tried to escape his brother's arms, but Fili was faster and caught him by his tunic. Kili couldn't move at all.
"Again, I am sorry, Gloin, about causing a problem." Fili apologized seriously.
"Like I said, it's all right, Fili." Gloin answered. "But if you insist so much to help me…" he began. "Last time I visited Thorin, I accidentally broke Dis' favorite vase, you know, the one in front of the kitchen."
Fili and Kili winced at the mention of that room, but Gloin didn't even notice. He wasn't sure if it was fair to ask them a favor, but still he did so.
"She wasn't home that day and Thorin had to leave for a while, so I stayed there in case you woke up. After that vase shattered, I cleaned everything and didn't say Dis. Could you explain to your mother that you accidentally broke it? She wouldn't be mad with you, I suppose."
Kili groaned, knowing too well what that meant. He would be the one to speak with his and Fili's mother. Fili couldn't be more happy to hear Gloin's words.
He released his breath with deep relief. "It's not a problem at all! I shall tell her immediately," brothers turned to leave and Fili added to his brother lowly, when they were out of Gloin's hearing. "Or one little brother shall."
And there was seventh…
"And everything comes full circle!" Fili almost sang to his fuming brother. "Finally you have the opportunity to talk with mum! Unless you want me to-"
"Don't even say it!" Kili interrupted angrily. "I don't want to hear anything about kitchen, shattered glass , birds and archery!"
"No, no, no, Kee. It's not what I meant." Fili grinned. "I was thinking about the dye. Do you remember uncle standing in front of the bathroom…"
"FILI!" Kili turned around about to slap his older brother.
Fili caught his arms and finished speaking. "…with his pink dyed hair and beard? I swear, I thought I would die of laughter right then and there! And mum! She was so red on her face!" Fili remembered.
Kili remembered too, but he was already tired from helping other dwarves solve their little problems. "You weren't the only one, I could barely hold back my laughter." he admitted.
"So, you think it would be a great idea to tell him who pulled that prank?"
"For Mahal's sake, Fili!" Kili threw his arms up. "You are making all worse! And I have had enough of this madness!" he complained.
"We have been doing this for such a long time, Kili. At least you were no longer bored." Fili teased. "Admit it, you loved it."
"Never" he groaned. "It's all your fault."
"My fault?! You killed the bird, Kee. Your prize broke the window and-" Fili argued back.
"See? How is this my fault?" Kili interrupted him. "You said it yourself! It was the pheasant, who-"
"But you dared me to try and kill it!"
"Because it was your idea with the competition! I was just playing!"
Fili growled in frustration as they neared their home. They didn't see that the window was repaired. They entered and went straight to their mum, who was sitting in front of fire place.
Dis smiled at her two sons and raised her eyebrows. "Fili? Kili? What's wrong? You look like you have been arguing with each other."
Brothers looked at each other. So, uncle didn't tell her anything, they thought.
"I was wondering, Kili." Dis spoke again. "What was your arrow doing in the kitchen, just under the furniture?" Dis showed her son the arrow and he took it, alarmed. "Did you loose it somehow?"
"How could I forget?" he whispered to Fili and glanced at Dis. "Mum, there's something I have to tell you about your favorite vase…" he began, completely uncomfortable. Fili only grinned.
"So, it was you, who broke it?" she asked. "That was rubbish, I have no idea why Thorin liked it so much."
"Wait," Fili interrupted. "Uncle?"
"Why, yes. It was given to him by…" she stopped. "Why are you two so worried?"
"W-well…" Kili fidgeted, his voice trembling. "Please, don't tell uncle!" he pleaded finally.
"Don't worry, Kili, I can forgive you not telling me this sooner…" she said slowly.
"You won't punish me?" Kili glanced up at her, hope shining in his eyes.
"No, I have only a small favor, if you don't mind." she winked.
The final reaction was…?
"I want you to tell your uncle that you poured pink dye to his hair shampoo."
There was silence. Disbelief. Eyes widened, eyebrows raised. Fili and Kili slowly turned to each other and then looked at their mother again. Are you kidding me?
"But mum, he will hate me! I don't want to lie to him, please, it wasn't me!" Kili moaned.
Dis nodded. "I know that, son. It was me." she admitted truthfully, smiling at the memory of her pink-haired older brother.
Fili and Kili only stared with open mouths. "YOU?!"
"But why?" asked Kili incredulously.
"Well, what did you think, how did you got that gift to pull a prank?" Dis winked, which made Kili laugh.
"Oh, Fee…" he turned to his brother. "Let's go then. I have to confess something to uncle!"
But Fili was not stupid. He knew what his brother really meant. "Go then. I am not going to do this for you." he shook his head.
"But Fili! It's your…!"
"I already covered you up when he came! I am not doing this again! I refuse!"
Dis only looked from Kili to Fili. "Boys? What are you talking about?"
"But I told mum about that vase!"
"And I took the blame instead of you for not coming to Gloin today!" Fili shouted.
"And I told Bofur about Oin's herbs and book!"
"It's not true! "
"But it was your turn then to talk to Oin and you didn't! Same for Ori!" Kili argued back.
"But I still told Bombur I ate his cake!"
"And I told Balin about pepper in Dwalin's pipe!"
Brothers were furious and even Dis couldn't stop them from shouting at each other. "FILI! KILI!" she tried again.
"And I told uncle about your pheasant, broken window and mess in the kitchen!" Fili snapped back.
"That cursed bird and stupid competition!" Kili growled frustrated. He grabbed his brother and mother and stormed from the room to find Thorin.
"What competition, boys?! What window?! What happened IN MY KITCHEN?!" Dis shouted.
"Kili stop this! What do you think you are doing?!" Fili squirmed.
"I am just doing what should've been done hours ago!"
"What is this noise?" Thorin was standing in the doorway, odd expression on his face.
Kili stopped in front of him and spoke quickly. "Uncle, I have to tell you something important."
Dis looked alarmed at her son.
"What is it, Kili?" Thorin asked confused.
"I killed that pheasant which caused all that mess in the kitchen earlier today." Kili confessed.
"What?"
Thorin only smirked. "I know, Kili. But I was waiting for you to tell me this personally."
Fili and Kili looked perplexed. Dis still wanted her answers, so Thorin explained to her, what had happened.
"You knew?" asked Fili, not believing at all.
"I heard you arguing when I was going back home. You forgot about broken window, lads. Besides, you really expected me to believe that it was Fili who accidentally killed a small bird?" Thorin winked.
"Excuse me, brother, but I don't understand one thing." Dis began. "I know how Kili's arrow landed in the kitchen and what happened to the food in pantry, but… Where are my dishes?"
"They fell and shattered on the floor, mum." answered Fili.
"And I'm so sorry for not predicting that…" Kili added, but was interrupted by laughing.
Everyone looked at shaking Dis. "Oh boys, you only saved me all the trouble! I wanted to throw them away long time ago!" she smiled. "I bought new dishes today, that was why I was not home."
Fili and Kili were astonished.
"I just… can't believe this." Fili said. "Are you sure that it wasn't all arranged or something?"
"So it was all for nothing? All the trouble for nothing?!" Kili mumbled and whined with resignation.
"I am afraid, lad, that you are right." Thorin said amused, his eyes shining with mirth.
Kili groaned again, but Fili was only laughing hard.
"Well, I hope that you both learned something today, boys." Thorin commented.
"Let me think," Kili began. "Never listen to your older brother when it comes to killing boredom?"
"Or never cover up for your younger brother's inability to run properly while hunting." added Fili.
"Fili!"
"What? It's true that you are clumsy!"
Thorin only smirked, while Dis couldn't stop laughing. She hugged her two sons. Thorin was watching them when he remembered something. Speaking of accidents…
"Tell me now," he got their attention. "Which one of you really wanted to dye my hair pink?" he asked.
And he didn't fail to see Dis' red face.
THE END!
Thank you very much, guys! I hope you liked it the same way I loved writing it!^^
Feel free to review, comment, PM me, anything!
Oh, and I once again apologize for any grammar errors...