AN: Hello again folks:) This is my first ever House of Anubis multi-chap fanfic. I'm very excited to write this because I ship Jara so much and it is amazing!

Basically the format of this story will be that the two characters are writing in their diaries.

It will go Mara then Jerome.

I just want to apologise in advance for the shortness of these chapters and I just want to warn you that there will be some references to self-harm in this fanfiction. I'm not sure how much it will be referenced because I haven't written it all yet but I will post warnings on individual chapters.

Hope you enjoy, please review:)

-Erin

P.S. Please try not to leave any spoilers in any reviews as, because I live in Britain, I'm only about 3/4's of the way through the series.

Monday the 21st February-

Mara Jaffray's diary:

This is exactly how it happened.

"Look Mick, it's not you, it's me."
"It doesn't matter Mara."
"But Mick-"
"Just leave it." he had then turned on his heel and walked away, one hand clenched tightly into a fist. He was angry and upset. I knew this would happen.

Why am I so selfish?

I have- I mean- had the perfect boyfriend. Mick was kind, funny and really romantic. I didn't deserve him. Then he just had to come along and ruin it. He had to waltz on in here and make me fall in love with him. Him with his piercing blue eyes and his tousled blonde hair.

Him being Jerome of course.

I admit it diary, I'm in love with Jerome Clarke. Truly, hopelessly head over heels. But he'll probably never feel the same.

Jerome's journal:

Finally... Finally.. FINALLY! Mara broke up with that stupid meathead! This could be my chance!

No, what am I saying, of course it couldn't.

Mara could never like me. She's nice and I'm mean, she's honest and I'm a lier, she's open and I put up walls. How could anybody ever love me if I can't let them in. I've built up so many walls to protect myself and others from pain.

One wall to protect myself from the pain of abandonment, brought on by my mother 'leaving me here to rot'. In which task I succeeded.

Another wall to protect myself from the pain of failure. If I get a D on a test I don't act like it affects me, but it does. So I lock the feeling away in a little box and throw away the key.

That must be what my brain is like. If you could step into my brain all you would see would be boxes. Huge piles of them, stacked on top of one another. Then you'd walk forward and see a maze of walls that showed you how messed up I truly was.

How could I ever let Mara into there. She'd hate me.

Then the final wall, the wall that built up slowly. The wall protecting me from the pain of rejection. The pain of Mara rejecting me.