Ryan stood in the kitchen at the counter anxiously eating his cereal. Today was the 1st day of school, and the 1st day he'd be able to see Marissa since the night he took on her mother for her. He had wanted to call, but didn't want to pressure her. He was beginning to understand how indecisive she was.
Karen walked into the kitchen unnoticed by Ryan but Seth acknowledged her without looking up from his comic book.
"Ryan," Kirsten started as she poured herself some coffee and turned around to face the two boy's one peering intently into his comic book, and the other staring unseen at his cereal, "I thought you were on a diet." Kirsten finished slightly skeptical.
Seth began to mumble something no one picked up and Ryan just looked at her, confused before he went back to his thoughts about Marissa. She obviously liked him, Didn't she?
She always came to him when things went wrong; she said that she didn't want him to leave. She was angry with him for what happened with Gabby, no matter how she denied it, but she seemed content when she woke up in her arms in Mexico.
Didn't that at least add up to like?
Next thing Ryan knew Marissa was standing next to him in the kitchen, starring at him with the intensity he was devoting to his cereal. If Ryan was a more animated person he might of given some verbal or physical sign that she had snuck up on him, but he wasn't so instead he felt his silence go from natural to anxious.
Marissa was so confused about her and Ryan. Really more than anything she just wanted them to be settled. She was undeniable attracted to him, and she definitely felt a connection, but did she want to be with him?
He knew her, or at least looked at her like he knew her, and that was new to her. Scary even. But also this "connection" was sort of comforting.
"HI" Marissa said softly, barely audible.
"Seth why don't you help me get my stuff in the car," Kirsten asked with a tone that only mothers can own warning him that she was not requesting his help but insisting on it.
"Sure, cuz Mr. Talkative here is really gonna sort things out in 5 min." Seth remarked with his usual sarcasm.
"Seth" Kirsten warned.
"Right right I'm coming. Give these two a chance to NOT talk about everything."
As Seth walked by Ryan kicked out a leg and let him stumble his way out of the kitchen, trying to get his point across in his nonverbal fashion.
"Always with the violence" Seth threw back at the two stationary figures as he retreated.
Ryan just rolled his eyes and then cast a sideways glance at Marissa to see how she was responding to Seth's comments. Marissa of course smiled cordially trying not to laugh out loud at the inappropriate but correct assessment of what she assumed would happen from now on.
Ryan wasn't sure what to do or say to her. He spent so much time with her as Luke's girl knowing nothing between them would ever develop and now she was free and standing next to him in the Cohen's kitchen.
Last time she was free he had asked her out putting himself out their, and in Mexico he had opened up, well as much as he knew how, confessing how he had obsessed about why she had come to the beach house and admitting, well begging in his own way that he really did want to know why. He had justified Gabby, asked for forgiveness as best as he could. But had she noticed his attempts, or was she blinded by his defensiveness.
"How have you been?" Marissa asked snapping Ryan beck from his obsessive thoughts.
"Shouldn't I be asking you?" Ryan responded trying not to dwell on himself, more concerned about her.
"No you shouldn't, I've decided to go into denial so that I wouldn't end up on medication and stop feeling anything." Marissa quipped remembering Summer's tirade on the beach after cotillion.
"Oh kay, " Ryan said slightly confused, "I'm fine really."
"Sorry I didn't call I . . .I mean . . ."
"Marissa, you were busy and I could of called you too so don't beat yourself up."
Before Marissa could respond or Ryan could continue the phone ring. A bit startled and annoyed by the constant string of interruptions and restraints between the two Ryan paused before going to the phone, contemplating not answering it.
Marissa nodded towards the phone letting him off the hook. But not before she could get one last dig in, "It's always gonna be like this?" Ryan turned back toward her with the phone in his hand. He smiled sadly as he putt the phone to his ear and said politely "Cohen residence."
Immediately after he answered the phone he turned around and began to whisper, before Marissa could move though Mr. Cohen walked in the room.
"Hey Marissa how are you?" Sandy asked concerned about the girl who seems to have touched Ryan so deeply.
"Hey Mr. Cohen." Marissa said distractedly starring at Ryan.
She had watched his posture deteriorate since he answered the phone. His whole demeanor worried her. He wasn't his normal self, but he wasn't the cocky disaffected youth she first meet on the driveway of the Cohen's either. He was childlike and unsure.
Mr. Cohen noticed what Marissa had and was about to ask Ryan what was going on when Seth came back into the Kitchen.
"Our hand basket has arrived, it's off to hell we go." Seth remarked before he noticed the air in the kitchen had grown thick with intrigue and concern.
"Ryan, what's going on? Who's on the phone?" Mr. Cohen asked.
Ryan quickly hung up the phone before anyone asked him anything else, and whirled around.
The first eye's he meet were Marissa's. She was concerned, he recognized that look, but he wasn't used to being on the receiving end of it. Ryan had already set his face, he was unreadable or so he thought.
Marissa had seen the flash of pain and knew that if there was ever going to be a time she could be there for him the way he was there for her it would be now.
Ryan didn't know what to do, didn't know how to comprehend what was going on, but knew he wanted Seth and Marissa Gone if he was gonna handle this situation.
"Mr. Cohen I need to talk to you." Ryan said not looking at anyone.
Taking the hint Seth took Marissa's elbow and tried to escort her out of the Kitchen, excusing them by saying "Well were gonna wait in the car then."
Ryan, out of habit more than anything else looked up as Marissa was leaving the room. When their eyes locked Marissa saw the same flash of pain she had seen a moment ago boosting her confidence.
She snatched back her arm and walked purposefully toward Ryan. She stopped only when she stood in front of him, challenging him with her face and posture, but betraying her own doubts with her eyes.
Sure they were friends but she wasn't sure they were good enough friends to be involved in whatever just went down on the phone. She felt close enough to bring him into her family issues, her personal issues, but what if he didn't feel close enough to let her in?
"Ryan what's going on" Marissa demanded holding firm to her instincts that she should be involved.
"Go to school Marissa, this isn't about you." Ryan answered with the tone she had only heard from him once before, in the model home. She remembered to well how painful that tone had been the first time . . . but she wasn't gonna let herself be pushed away again.
Ryan noticed her flinch and was also brought back mentally to the model home, and realized that he didn't have the strength to make her run away from him crying again.
"My mother threatening to send me to the Asylum wasn't about you."
"Yeah your right," Ryan admitted his eyes getting softer. He stepped in closer to her, leaning in till their foreheads were touching. Marissa was momentarily distracted by how close Ryan's lips were until he said, "But you asked for my help, I'm not asking for yours."
Marissa pushed him back angrily then stepped in closer to him effectively pinning him against the counter.
"You need me Just as much as I needed you" she bit back daring him to deny her, pleading with him to leave it at that and not make her explain more to him.
He didn't say yes or no but they both understood when he placed his hand on her hip and eased her back gently that she wasn't going anywhere. Ryan hated to admit it to himself, and he sure as hell wasn't going to say it out loud, but she was right. He did need her and did want her support right now.
Marissa knew Ryan would never admit he needed her. He didn't need anyone, and she understood this, but she also understood that it was a load of bullshit. He needed his walls, and she'd let him have them at least today.
Sandy and Seth watched this little display, and couldn't help feeling like peeping toms. The only way this display could have been more private was maybe if it had taken place in the shower, and Ryan and Marissa were naked.
Seth beginning to realize that he would be the only one in the kitchen leaving for The Harbor School now turned and walked out of the kitchen.
"That was better then watching TNT, thanks for my morning drama Dawson and Joey."
"Seth." Sandy warned as his sarcastic son left the kitchen trying not to smile.
Marissa Chuckled slightly at Seth's comment and at Ryan's rolling eyes. Even if these two were new to the sibling thing they definitely had it down.
Neither Ryan nor Marissa noticed when Sandy started to talk, both to busy staring at each other, measuring each other. Ryan wasn't sure how much he would have to pay Marissa or Seth or Mr. Cohen to get Marissa to leave but whatever price at that moment it would have been worth it.
"Ryan . . .Ryan!" Sandy asked over and over.
"Sorry what . . ." Ryan finally responded as he stepped out from behind Marissa and in front of her.
Marissa Noticed this; his protective nature before when he stepped in front of the angry Luke at her Cotillion and when he had been so decisive and strong when dealing with his mother.
She wasn't gonna let him protect her from himself though, that much she had promised at the model home. Even though really at the model home he had been protecting himself, she could even then see the knight in shinning armor that Ryan had hidden within him.
She slid up next to Ryan snaking her hand around his waist. Unconsciously Ryan dropped his hand, opposite the hip Marissa's hand was resting on, from the counter in front of him and placed it on top of Marissa's hand.
"Ryan, Who was on the phone?" Sandy asked again
Ryan looked down, pausing and Sandy continued growing restless.
"Come on Ryan . . .You asked for this . . .who was on the phone?"
"Trey" Ryan responded quickly with no tone reflecting in his voice.
"Ohhh . . ." Sandy's eyes got even softer, if that was possible, causing Marissa to grow more and more concerned.
"What did he want?" Sandy asked.
"He's . . . He's in chino, looking for me."
"How'd he get this number?"
"From A.J. My mom's boyfriend."
"She . . ."
"She's a drunk and a liar." Ryan said. His tone was harsh and bitter; reminding Sandy of how Ryan had sounded in jail, talking about dreams and intelligence.
"What does. . ."
"Who's Trey?" Marissa asked interrupting Sandy, trying to get a word in edgewise between the two men.
Ryan didn't look at Marissa he kept his eyes ahead toward Sandy But turned his head slightly toward Marissa.
"He's my brother." Ryan said
"Ryan They found him guilty on Gun possession, drug possession and grand theft auto only a month ago, He couldn't be . . ."
"I don't think he's out legally." Ryan said
"You mean he escaped, from jail" Marissa said confused.