So here it is, the sequel to Safe in the Arms of Love. It would probably be helpful if you read that one first but I'm not sure if it's absolutely necessary. Basically, what's happend so far is 16 year old Sam Logan shows up at Dean's shop one day after being beaten and raped daily for the past four years. He and Dean form a bond and Sam ends up living with Dean after Dean gains custody of Sam. Frank, Sam's abuser was put on trial and is now in jail while Sam tries to pick up the pieces and move on with his life. This story will contain mentions of Sam's rape and the abuse.
I want to send out a big thank you in advance to everyone who reads this story and also to those of you who send me a review! I hope you all enjoy it. Please let me know what you thought of it and I'll hopefully have the next part up relatively soon. :)
"Alright, you sure you want to do this?" Dean asked as he made sure Sam was comfortable for the night. "Because you know if you're not ready, it's okay with me."
Sam nodded. "I'll be okay." I hope. "Ace is here and I know you're just down the hall." He replied suppressing a yawn. Since his nightmares had decreased in frequency and intensity, he wanted to see if he could manage a night on his own.
Dean was proud as he finished 'tucking' Sam in. He was glad that the kid was continuing to gain more confidence in himself and his abilities and that Frank no longer controlled how Sam felt on a daily basis. He was also happy that Sam felt safe enough to be on his own for a few hours. "Okay, sweet dreams Sammy. I'll see you in the morning." Dean said flipping off the light hoping that Sam got a good night sleep, knowing he'd need it.
"Night Dean." Sam mumbled, quickly falling asleep dreaming about the more enjoyable times in his life.
Sam, Dean and Ace were walking back from fishing at the river. Today was Sam's seventeenth birthday and it was easily the best one yet. They'd spent the entire weekend camping, just as Sam had asked to do and had one more day left in their trip.
"You having a good day so far?" Dean asked as he carried his and Sam's fishing poles. They hadn't caught anything today but that was fine with Dean. He knew they weren't going to starve.
Sam smiled and nodded. "Yeah… wow… Dean, what happened to our camp site?" Sam asked as he looked around in shock at the different decorations that weren't there when they left.
"What do you mean?" Dean asked, playing dumb as Sean, James and a few other friends walked over. "It looks fine to me." Mike was barbequing and the smell of it made Dean's stomach growl.
James walked over to Sam and smiled a little. The two had met only a handful of times before but they got along and there was something about James that put Sam at ease. James was also patient with Sam which Dean knew from experience wasn't necessarily an easy thing to be. Dean had been very happy to find out that James and Sam were going to be attending the same school and he hoped that having James there would make the transition easier for Sam.
"Happy birthday kid." Dean said patting Sam on the back. "C'mon, dinner's ready." Dean said nudging Sam toward the group.
After everyone had gotten their fill of barbequed hamburgers and hotdogs, it was time for presents and cake. Sam got mostly movies, books and clothes but there was a special one Dean was saving for last. "Thanks… this um, these mean a lot." Sam said looking at the pile of presents in front of him. It wasn't the actual gifts that had meant so much to him but the thought behind them. He couldn't remember the last time he'd been given a birthday gift that didn't include him needing his birthday suit.
"Wait, we're not quite done yet." Dean said motioning to Sean who turned around and disappeared down the dirt path.
"What do you mean?" He asked confused. Just then a car started up and the sound of crunching gravel came from nearby. A few moments later, a black Ford Explorer pulled into the campsite.
"Wow." James said in admiration of the shiny, new car. Unlike Sam, James was a total car buff and had tried to get Dean to hand over the keys to the Impala more than once.
Sam looked at Dean questioningly who nodded. Still in a state of shock, he got up and examined the car closer.
"Dude, you so have to take me for a ride in that thing." James said joining Sam. "It's sweet!"
"How'd, how'd you… I thought it was a customer's?" Sam asked.
"It was, now, it's yours. The guy told me after I fixed it up he was going to sell it so I bought it from him. You like it?" Dean asked already knowing the answer. Even though Sam wasn't into cars the way Dean was, he'd seen Sam taking several peaks inside it and knew the kid wanted it but like everything else, Sam would never ask for it.
Sam nodded as he opened the driver side door and climbed in admiring the leather seats and steering wheel as well as the brand new CD player. Dean opened the rear passenger door and Ace jumped up into the seat while James climbed in beside Sam. "You wanna trade brothers?" He asked his voice full of jealousy.
Sam smiled as he shook his head no.
"Morning sleepyhead." Dean said walking into Sam's room and brushing the bangs off Sam's forehead. Ace jumped down and ran out to the kitchen, eager for his breakfast.
"Time already?" Sam asked his stomach suddenly full of butterflies. Today was supposed to be his first day of high school.
"Yup, c'mon, you don't want to be late." Dean said. "I've got breakfast going so get dressed and then come out alright."
Sam nodded but didn't move for several minutes after.
Dean had just served up two plates of scrambled eggs, bacon and toast when Sam came walking into the kitchen wearing a pair of dark jeans, his sneakers and one of Dean's sweatshirts. Damn it Dean thought as he saw the sweatshirt on Sam. He had hoped that Sam would have more confidence than that by now. He hoped this wasn't going to be one step forward and two steps back.
He watched as Sam mostly picked at his plate, too nervous to be able to eat. Dean looked at the clock and saw that it was a little after seven forty. "We should go. You want to drive?" He asked putting his dish in the sink.
Sam shook his head no and made no move to get up from the table.
"Sammy," Dean walked over and kneeled down in front of him.
"Dean, I'm scared… can't we wait, please. Just one more day?" He begged.
Dean reached up and gently grasped Sam's hand in his. He knew that he couldn't allow Sam to wait. If he didn't go today then he would just ask to wait again tomorrow and it would become a harmful routine. "You can do this kiddo, you can. I know it seems scary but think about everything else we've been through. This is nothing." Sam looked away. "I promise if it gets to be too much then you can call me and I'll come get you. And kid, James and Mike are going to be there. You're not going to be alone." He reassured.
After a moment Sam wiped his hand across his eyes and got up, picking his backpack up off the couch. "Bye Ace, I'll see you in a few hours." Sam said quietly.
Sam stared at his feet the entire way to the high school. Dean pulled into the back parking lot and killed the engine. "You'll be fine okay, I know you will." He smiled a little.
Sam looked up with a doubtful expression on his face and opened the door, grabbing his backpack from the back seat.
"Hey Sammy," Dean called. "Have a great day okay, I'll see you later."
Sam nodded and slung his backpack over his shoulders. "Bye Dean." He muttered as he watched Dean drive away. He fought back the tears and wiped his sweaty hands on his jeans before pulling out his schedule. History, right, he had history first He thought as he tried to remember where that room was. A few days ago, he and Dean had come to the high school after Sam had gotten his schedule and found each of Sam's classes, in an effort to make it a bit easier on him.
Swallowing down the urge to go chase after the Impala, Sam began to walk towards room 604. He was grateful that he found it rather quickly and was very happy to see that besides the teacher, he was the rooms' only occupant. "Hello." The older man said.
DW/SW
Dean sighed as he drove away. He hoped today went okay and that Sam wasn't too self-conscious or hard on himself. He'd asked Mike to watch out for the kid and knew that he would but he was still nervous hoping that nothing happened today to end up in a major setback.
Sam had made so much progress in the last couple of months and Dean was beyond proud of him. Ever since he let go of the guilt and actually forgave himself for the past, he'd become more confidant. He still had days where he was insecure and wanted nothing more than to hide out at home and avoid any and all social contact. He still hated talking to strangers but Dean could see a change in him. He smiled more and although this only happened at home, Sam often voiced his opinion and Dean was always happy to hear the kid thinking for himself.
They had also set up a routine in the past couple of months and it helped to offer Sam a sense of structure and security, unlike anything he'd ever known before. Both Sam and Dean usually woke up a little before seven, had breakfast and on the weekends took Ace for a walk in the mornings. In the evenings, Sam would often work out on his punching bag, allowing him to deal with what he wanted when he wanted to. If there were any lingering issues that were still bugging Sam, he would then go to Dean and most of the time, they would be resolved.
"Hey," Sean smiled when he saw Dean walk into the shop.
Dean acknowledged him with a nod.
"Where's Sam… oh, right…" Sean replied. "How was he?"
"Nervous. He asked not to go, do you think I made a mistake in making him go today?" He asked nervously, doubting himself.
Sean shook his head no. "He's got to start sometime right?"
"Yeah…" Dean drifted off, staring at the clock wishing that it was three instead of just after eight.
"He'll be fine." Sean reassured.
DW/SW
It was official. Sam hated school and was in a rotten mood by the time the bell rang. History class had just ended and was now Sam's most hated subject. His seat was smack dab in the middle of the class and Sam felt as though everyone was glaring at him as he tried to pay attention only to find it damn near impossible. He kept his hands in the pocket of Dean's sweatshirt, nervously wringing them constantly and trying as hard as he could not to break down in tears, screaming for his big brother. The fact that he had math, his hardest subject next made his morning even worse. Room 304 304 304 Sam kept reminding himself, determined not to get lost on his first day.
Wandering through the halls alone made Sam feel like a total fish out of water. As he saw all the groups of friends together, eagerly chatting about their summers, he missed Dean more than ever. Dean was easily his best friend and the most important person in his life. He felt so alone and knew that if anyone ever found out about Frank, none of them would ever talk to him again. They probably already do know, that's why everyone is avoiding you he thought fighting back tears. He knew James was around somewhere but he hadn't found him yet and he wasn't even sure that James would want to hang out with him… not in public. He was beyond relieved to find his teacher, Ms. Terly alone in the room.
"Hi there," She smiled kindly when Sam walked into the room. "I'm Ms. Terly but you know that."
"Hi." He whispered in a shaky voice.
"I don't have a seating chart so you can sit wherever you like." She said continuing to stack papers.
Sam quietly walked to the very last desk and slumped down in it.
"Are you new here?" Ms. Terly asked after a few minutes.
Sam nodded. "Yeah, I… I um… I live with my brother." He answered.
"Does your brother go here?" She asked wondering if she'd ever had his brother in one of her classes.
"No, he graduated a few years ago." Sam explained.
Ms. Terly was about to ask who his brother was but the bell rang and the room quickly filled up. After everyone had taken their seats, she began to explain class protocol all the while noticing how freaked out Sam looked the entire period. It was obvious this was his first day.
Forty-five minutes later, the bell rang signaling that class was over and it was time for break. Sam waited until everyone left before even beginning to move from his spot. "Bye Sam, I'll see you tomorrow." Ms. Terly smiled kindly as Sam whispered a goodbye.
After fifteen agonizingly long minutes, Sam headed towards the art room where he would have ceramics. His teacher Mrs. Heatherly was standing at the back of the room talking to a group of students so Sam quietly made his way over to a stool and sat down. After the bell rang, she explained how first they were going to make things out of clay using just their hands and then once they had gained some experience, they could move to the wheel if they wished to.
Sam looked at his schedule and saw he had P.E. next. The thought of locker rooms and having to change in front of his classmates made Sam want to cry. It was already awkward but this was going to be torture. They'd see his scars and know for sure what he'd done.
Once the bell had rung, Sam started walking to the large gym feeling as if he was on his death march. He got to the gym and found that it was already pretty crowded. Great! He scowled. He walked towards the bleachers with his head down and had just sat down when he heard someone calling his name. At first he ignored them, hoping they would just leave him alone but the voice came closer until someone was sitting next to him. "Hey," James smiled.
Sam managed to muster a small smile but shortly after returned his attention to the shiny wooden floor trying to picture himself anywhere else.
"Alright, listen up class, my name's Mr. Martin and I'll be your teacher. This is a P.E. class so we will be doing actual exercise in here and I don't want to hear any complaints." The blonde haired man started.
"Mark said he's tough." James whispered.
Sam nodded while trying hard not to feel intimidated. His past P.E. classes were not good memories. He had always been chosen last and growing up, he was by far the smallest kid causing everyone else to think of him as weak. He bit his lip and sat on his hands trying to get rid of the shaking that was coursing through him. He wanted Dean so badly right then that it was actually painful.
Mr. Martin clapped to get everyone's attention and continued with his first day speech. "Today we'll be going over what I expect from each of you and then we'll assign you to a uniform and a locker." He continued as several girls groaned at the thought of having to wear uniforms. "First off, I have these forms that I need each of you to take home and have your parents sign." He said handing a stack to the girl sitting closest to him. "Please take one and pass it back. Okay, next on the agenda are my expectations. Now, I know summer just ended and more than likely you guys were a bit of couch potatoes but that's about to change. We'll be doing one sport for four weeks at a time as well as running every week. If you have any issues that might prevent you from participating please let me know ahead of time and we'll figure out an alternative activity. Now, I want you to form a single file line in alphabetical order. A's over here and z's on the other side of the gym. Go." He ordered and a minute later there was a flurry of activity as students rushed to get in line.
Hesitantly, Sam followed James to the back of the line and waited to get his uniform and locker number.
Oh god, please don't make me go through this, please. I just want to go home. Sam's mind screamed as he walked into the boy's locker room. His palms were sweaty and he felt as if he might pass out. He felt as if everyone was staring at him and he did not like the thought of having to undress in front of strangers. Ever since he'd escaped from Frank, no one, including Dean, had ever seen him without his shirt on. He walked down the aisles trying to find his locker number and was relieved when it was in the back of the room in a corner. At least here he'd have a little privacy.
"Hey Sam, do you want to eat with me today?" James asked as the lunch bell rang.
Sam was shocked. Even though he and James talked and generally got along, he didn't think James would want to be seen with him so the invitation was surprising. After a moment, he nodded.
"Great, let's go. Hey, where's your locker? Do you need to get anything from it?" James asked knowing how shy Sam could be.
Sam shook his head no. He hadn't even picked one out yet.
"Oh okay, c'mon. Cafeteria's this way." James said leading the way. "Hey guys, this is Sam. He's gonna eat with us. Sam, meet the guys. That's Andy, Ryan, Alex and Bobby."
Not wanting to be rude but at the same time wanting to hide underneath the nearest rock, Sam offered them a smile that didn't reach his eyes.
"Did you bring your lunch or are you buying?" James asked checking his wallet to see how much money he had.
Sam pulled out the brown paper bag and unfolded the foil around his sandwich.
"Oh, okay, I'll be back in a sec. Who else is buying?" James asked.
Alex and Ryan joined James and then the three were off to buy their lunches. Sam sat at the table feeling as if he didn't belong. He desperately wanted to go home and just curl up underneath the covers and hide. He knew Dean had said to call him if he needed to but he didn't want to look like a baby so he stayed where he was.
James, Alex and Ryan returned a few minutes later with a turkey sandwich, a soda and three chocolate chip cookies each. Sam sat off to the side, listening to the conversations between the five other boys. Half an hour later, the bell rang signaling the end of lunch.
"Which way are you going?" Bobby asked Ryan.
"I got English next." Ryan answered.
"With who?" Sam asked quietly, hoping Ryan had Mike.
"Ah… Mr. McNearny, why do you have it next too?" Ryan asked.
Sam nodded.
"Cool, let's go." Sam slung his backpack on and followed Ryan to Mike's room.
"Oh hey Sam," Mike smiled when Sam walked into the classroom.
"Hi Mike." Sam answered happy to be around someone he knew and trusted.
"First name basis with the teacher hunh?" Ryan teased light-heartedly.
"He's best friends with my brother." Sam explained defensively.
"Oh right… Dean, he owns the body shop right?" He asked remembering what James had told them about Sam.
Sam nodded and sat back in his seat waiting for the bell to ring feeling a little bit more at ease with Mike around.
Mike waited until everyone settled down and then began the usual first day of school business. He kept a discreet eye on Sam the entire time, watching how it was clear he was trying to pay attention but also very, very self-conscious. He didn't know if he picked up on Sam's behavior because he was used to the kid or if Sam was just being blatantly shy.
Sam's next class was earth science. He said bye to Ryan and then made his way to the back of school towards the science building. His teacher was Mr. Andrews, a wiry middle aged man with a major bald spot and a mustache. "The seating chart's up here." He said when Sam, along with a few other students walked in. Sam headed over to the front of the class and saw that his seat was at one of the high tables off to the side of the room. He set his backpack down and took out his binder, waiting for class to start.
"Hi," A girl with brown hair that was tied up in a messy ponytail and friendly green eyes said. "I'm Kate." She said pushing her glasses up on her nose a little.
Sam felt his hands begin to tremble and quickly stuffed them into his jacket pockets. He took a breath and tried to control his stuttering. "Sam." He said in a quiet voice.
She smiled and then proceeded to take out the necessary supplies. Mr. Andrews then passed out a paper that had a bunch of boxes on it. The goal of the assignment was to be the first student to have a name in every box. "Do you want me to sign yours?" Kate asked.
Sam nodded and handed her his paper.
"Do you want to sign mine?" She asked.
"Okay." Sam replied taking a look at the boxes. He ended up signing the one that said he went camping this past summer.
"Thanks." Kate hopped off the stool and began to walk around the classroom.
Sam looked down at his paper and saw the initials KJ in the box that said she was the oldest child in her family. Too nervous to approach anyone, Sam remained in his seat and waited for people to come to him.
Sam felt like he could breathe again when the bell rang and he hurriedly made it to his last class of the day, study skills. He walked into the mostly empty room. His teacher, Mr. Pezino, was standing over by the whiteboard. "Oh hi, I'm Mr. Pezino but you can call me Pez." The older man said.
Sam set his backpack down on one of the tables. Sam soon found out that this was his smallest class with only five other students in it, most of which were in his grade. He also realized that this was basically his free period to do what he wanted or needed to get done for his other classes. Sam didn't bother to say goodbye and then rushed out to the front of the school. He was relieved to see the slick black machine waiting for him at the curb.
"Hey kiddo," Dean smiled happy to see that Sam at least appeared to be okay but as he got a closer look, he saw the tremble to Sam's hands and grew concerned but before he could ask what was wrong, Sam turned to him with tear filled eyes.
"Can't we just go home, please Dean?" Sam practically begged.
"Yeah kiddo, we'll go home." Dean said turning out of the parking lot hoping that he could undo whatever damage had been done.
Okay, so there it is. I hope you enjoyed it and I look forward to hearing from you and remember constructive critism is always welcome. Hope you enjoyed it! :)