Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter

Plot: For the sake of helping out a neighbor, Hermione agreed to babysit a set of twins for the day. When she gets caught in the middle of their animosity, it turns into a domino effect of one big humiliating situation.

This short work was inspired by la z boy who I've worked with on a sequel to a prank fic. And now, I've decided to write a short one here. (M- rating for some nudity)

Chapter 1: Little Boys Blue

"Hermione dear, I can't tell you how grateful I am to you for doing this."

"It's no problem," she said happily. "I'm always happy to help Mrs. Forwick."

Hermione smiled at the woman who once appeared to tower over her, but now seemed small. She still, however, possessed a body as slim as a street light. Mrs. Eliza Forwick happened to be an old friendly neighbor who once lived next door to her parents. Several months ago, before Hermione returned from Hogwarts, she had decided to move a bit further away. Though she was fairly young, she looked a bit old and worn due to the lines on her face and the gray hairs popping up from her brown hair that was pulled back into a bun. It almost made her look a bit like McGonagall. Mrs. Forwick had never been one to ask for favors, but when it came to her boys, she sometimes broke her rule.

"Well, come in and get acquainted with my home then."

Hermione stepped inside and found herself impressed. Though it looked small on the outside, it was quite large inside. It looked to be on the verge of being luxurious with furniture that seemed to be of the finest quality. There were a few expensive looking paintings hanging on the walls and over the fireplace, and a great gold chandelier hanging over the velvet couch. But this look contrasted with the wallpaper that was peeling from the walls, a couple of unidentifiable stains on the carpet, and a few badly repaired chairs and tables. Hermione couldn't help noticing that some of the shelves contained broken items. Upon closer inspection, Hermione saw that some of her exquisite looking furnishings had scratches or were patched up as if they'd been used.

"I know it might not be the best looking in places, but-"

"Oh, it's alright," Hermione assured her.

"Sometimes I just…can't get around to cleaning. Those boys of mine. Oh, you should meet them. Oscar! Rudy! Come meet your babysitter Hermione!"

From upstairs Hermione could hear heavy footsteps, but she could also hear their voices raised in anger. Within a few minutes two brown haired eight year olds came into view. There was no mistaking their arguing. They were so focused on yelling at one another and not looking down that Hermione was sure they'd end up tripping and falling down the stairs.

"You did!"

"I didn't!"

"You did!"

"I didn't!"

"You did!"

"Boys, boys, please...not today," said Mrs. Forwick exasperatedly. She held her fingers against her forehead as if to stop an oncoming headache. "I'm sorry my dear, but these two tend to argue…quite a bit."

Hermione looked at the two as they continued their arguing even as they approached them. She did recall hearing her father's theory that the reason for the move was due to her boys' constant fighting. Her parents admitted having heard them a lot lately before their mother moved them further away from almost everyone.

"That's understandable. Brothers will fight every now and…then." Hermione had dropped her gaze and raised a suspicious brow at the sight of one of the boy's hands, which were blue. When it came to the other boy, there were specks of blue paint on his shirt.

"Yes, but ever since…well, they've really been at each other's throats. What I wouldn't give for their father to be here," Mrs. Forwick reluctantly admitted.

"Oh, is he on vacation or something?" Hermione asked, though she felt she may have been rude to pry.

"You could say that. Boys! Oscar! Rudy! Stop!" They continued to argue. "I had them upstairs in their room, painting. Apparently that didn't make much of a difference to get them to be friendly with one another."

"You did it you lousy git!"

"No I didn't you brainless twit!"

"Shut up!"

"You shut up!"

"BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP!" Mrs. Forwick's yell startled the twins and Hermione, but it did the trick. They quieted, reluctantly, and looked around. "Now! Hermione is here for you! Hermione, meet Oscar, and Rudy."

She indicated Oscar who had the blue hands and was standing to their left in a green shirt, and Rudy who was standing to their right in a red shirt with the flecks of blue paint. They were as identical as Fred was to George.

"Have you ever dealt with twins before?" Mrs. Forwick asked.

"Yeah, but they were a bit older," Hermione said with a smirk as she thought of the Weasley twins. "Hello Oscar, Rudy. It's nice to meet you."

They tossed each other angry looks before speaking.

"Hi," said Oscar in annoyance.

"Hi," said Rudy in the same tone. "Mom! Oscar ruined my picture!"

"I did not!" Oscar argued. "He ruined mine!"

"Boys…I don't have time for this. You can either settle your disputes yourself, or you won't get anything special when I return home."

"How special?" asked Rudy curiously.

"Never mind. Now I want you to mind Hermione, do I make myself clear?"

"Yes mom," they both answered with hanging heads.

"Hermione, could you see me to the door." Hermione followed, leaving the boys out of earshot. "Now, I know you haven't had much babysitting experience, but if you're in need of me, do use the phone in the kitchen. My number's right next to it. They're so focused on fighting, you won't have to worry much. I'm afraid I won't be back until late, so feel free to have anything you want in the cupboards or refrigerator. I owe you so much."

"Thank you. I'm sure everything will be just fine. Have a nice day."

With a nod, and a suspicious look back at her boys, Mrs. Forwick walked away. Hermione closed the door and turned to hear and see Oscar and Rudy resuming their argument.

"You did!" cried Rudy.

"I didn't!" cried Oscar.

"For that, I ought to rip up your undies and burn up those sports posters again!"

"You try it and I'll stick your head in the toilet! You'll be stuck all day and night!"

"I'd like to see you try!"

"Oh yeah!"

"Yeah!"

Hermione sighed heavily as she leaned against the door.

"Maybe this won't be as easy as I thought."

This was meant to be a oneshot, but I decided it's probably best to break it up into chapters. This was the introduction, next, it's on to the fun stuff. So chapter 2, coming soon.