"I can sing if I want, Nookie." the white dog sneered. "You're just mad because I get paid for singing "fake words" and you get paid for actually working."
Tom Nook was fed up with K.K. Slider's shit. All this douche ever did was sing his little, tasteless songs and then everyone and their brother would give him money. He appeared on every single Nintendo Life magazine in existence for no reason.
How are all these little-girl villagers buying into this crap?!
He can't even sing!
"This brat needs to be taught a lesson… in hard work." Tom Nook mumbled.
"Hey!" Brewster called as he cleaned a tea cup. "Leave him alone, Nook. He's not hurting anybody."
Tom Nook glared at Brewster.
"This bastard is hurting me! My ears specifically! Why is it that he's so popular? What's the hypnotizing secret of his songs?!" He bellowed.
Villager finally snapped.
"Shut up, Tom Nook! K.K. is the best! I love him."
…
Did Villager really just say that he loved K.K.? People always thought that female villagers loved him… Villager is a secret K.K. fan?
"Sir?" Isabelle asked.
Villager's face lit up. That was suppose to be a secret! K.K. was listening in too!
"Ha! GAY!" Little Mac and Sonic called from inside The Roost.
Villager turned to them in anger.
"Shut up! I just really like his music!"
Villager felt like he was going to die of embarrassment.
Everyone at The Roost knew.
Everyone.
"Hahahahaha! Do you wear K.K. underwear, loser?" Mac teased.
Mac's statement caused Sonic to laugh hysterically and earned some snickers from the other customers.
"What if I do? Huh?!" Villager said. "There's nothing wrong with it!"
Mac and Sonic continued to tease Villager until he began to cry. Some wanted to help. Others were just laughing.
K.K. was not laughing.
K.K. (still keeping his nonchalant face) began to play the tune of K.K. Cruisin'.
Only his lyrics were a little different.
"Let me go, please now. We-hell let me go. Me go! Me go! Me go! Let go! Let me go, please now. Please let me go. Let me go, please now. Just let me go. Me go! Me go! Me go! Me go! Let me go, please now. Won't you let me go? I wanna say baby! Say baby! Say baby! Say baby! Say baby! Say baby! Please go! Please go! Please go! Let go now! Hey baby! Hey baby! Hey baby! Oh, hey baby! Hey Baby! Hey baby! *Epic whistling* Oh, won't you set me free!? Set me free! Set me free now! Set me free! Set me free! Set me free! Let go! Let go! Let go now! Set me free! Set me free! Set me free! Just set me free! Set me free! Set me free! Just wanna feel the gentle breeze now! Set me free! Hear my plea! Let me be now! Set me free! It's the key! Please agree! I'll go! I'll go! I'll go! I'll go now! Won't that be dandy?! Well then come with me! Then you'll see now! It's meant to be! Come with me! Come with me! *Howls*"
All women in the building freaked the freak out.
"That song went out to that villager over there." K.K. said as he pointed towards villager.
Villager saw that K.K., his hero, was pointing at him. Villager then died instantly, prompting Dr. Mario to arrive. Mac and Sonic were shut up by the fangirls. Tom Nook was trampled.
Moral: K.K. is awesome.