Alternate descriptions: No matter how hard they try to stay away, they'll always be drawn to each other. / There are just some things that are inevitable.
Even though I told myself time and time again that I would never do another M story, here I am, with another one. Sighs heavily.
When this is supposed to be set, I'm not really sure, as I haven't really thought about it, but let's just say that it's in the near future. This fic assumes that the two canons have broken up, and the reason to how Shenny got together will be revealed in a later chapter.
Also, this chapter is the prologue, and the actual story starts in the next two chapters, just saying.
Disclaimer: I do not own the Big Bang Theory or its characters, or its dwindling and disappointing storyline that made me concoct this fic. What I do own is the plot, the mistakes that I've missed and I don't know, the smut. This story will have its fair share of lemons, and will eventually have both dark!Sheldon and dark!Penny, so please be warned. The darkness won't be enough to destroy lives, or cause you to kill me, and it's not even as dark as I'm letting it out to be, but it is dark compared to every other fic I've ever done. Obsessions and vengeances aren't kid friendly. Un-beta'd.
With that said, welcome to the prelude of The Magnitude of Gravity. Enjoy!
unequivocal (adjective) - not equivocal; unambiguous; clear; having only one possible meaning or interpretation; leaving no doubt:
Penny was never sure when everything had started—why it started—but once it did, they never stopped.
She was talking about her trysts with Sheldon.
There really wasn't anything special about Sheldon; he wasn't the tallest, nor the bulkiest, nor the handsomest guy she had been with—he was definitely the smartest—but for some reason, she just couldn't keep herself away from him. And that was saying a lot especially with all of his annoying traits; like how he brought himself as if he was greater than all of them, or his annoying habit of talking when no one cared, or how he looked down on her cause she was a community college dropout, or his clear blue eyes and how it lit up when he did something he liked.
How it darkened whenever she kissed him—or when he kissed her—it didn't really matter right now.
His large hands and how firm they were when he held her; how they roamed her body like he had never touched her before. Those long fingers of his that he dragged across her skin as he brought his mouth to hers—it wasn't fair. It really wasn't fair that she was so attracted to him and couldn't stay away from him. It isn't fair—was what she murmurs to herself before she pulls him towards her. She was some sort of metal, and he was a magnet that drew her to him without any effort. Whenever he was close enough to be touched, it was impossible to stop her from attacking him. However, they weren't supposed to act they way they were acting now. It was wrong—what they were supposed to do when they met earlier in the hall was to simply smile at each other before heading their own way. Maybe even exchange some banal chit chat that he absolutely hated.
They were not supposed to have lingering glances as they conversed. One that made her forget that she had to go and do her laundry.
Penny was not supposed to be turned on when she saw his tongue dart out to lick his lips.
Sheldon was not supposed to notice how she specifically wore her skimpy outfits when they were alone.
They were not supposed to meet whenever the coast was clear, where they could do anything they desired.
She was not supposed to be up against her door, one leg hooked around his waist as he sucked on her pulse. Her hand should not have been fumbling with his zipper, wishing that the damn thing would just disappear. His hand shouldn't have been making it's way down shorts, slowly pulling it down. It was wrong for her to have kissed him in the middle of the hall, just for smiling at her after she had told him that her day was fine. The accepted course of actions when your neighbor asks how your day went was to first answer, then ask how his went, then finally, return to your apartment. In their case, they would have returned to their respective apartments where he would do whatever the hell he would do, and she would paint her nails, or something. The course of actions she took was to pull Sheldon down by the hem of his shirt and kissing him—hard—before dragging him back to her apartment.
The real accepted course of actions were for them to refrain from doing what they had been doing for—what was it?—days? Weeks? Months? Penny was sure that their little affair hadn't reached a year, but she was pretty sure that it was close. It wasn't really an affair, since they both weren't dating anyone, but the secrecy had made it feel as if it were an affair. All she knew was that Sheldon had been fucking her, and he was fucking her goo—well. Or, vice versa.
Sheldon gave her neck one last nip before pulling her shorts all the way down her legs, a hungry, lustful look on his face. It didn't mean anything other than what it was suppose to mean, but there were times when she thought that he meant something else. Sometimes, she sees admiration in his eyes, or maybe even affection, but she'd never been sure. The inner, hidden side of her wished that his gazes meant something more, but that was wishful thinking. The Sheldon she knew was socially retarded, innocent and somewhat asexual. The Sheldon in front of her was dominant, rough and was far from asexual. She didn't prefer one over the other—they were the same person—but there were times that she liked this darker shade of Sheldon more. This one made her feel special—loved, even—with how he went out of his way to meet with her. And how he kissed her, and how he smiled at her like he always knew and understood what she was thinking. It made her wonder if Sheldon had always been like this—if all he needed was a taste of sex before realizing that he liked it. If this was the real him that he didn't want to show. Maybe he was never asexual to begin with. Maybe he was just waiting for her. Ha, that would have been a funny joke if she didn't wish that it was true.
"What time are they coming back from that movie?" Penny asked against his mouth. She loved how he kissed her—it was hard, passionate, hot and left her wanting more. This was one of the things she loved about this new Sheldon that only she knew of.
"The movie ends at ten. They will be back in about half an hour." The physicist replied before pulling them off of the door and leading them towards her room. "Did you lock your door? We cannot be caught."
"I locked it alright," she whispered, pushing him off of her and on to her bed. "Do you seriously think I want to get caught?" With a small shake of her head, she pulled her shirt off of her body, tossing it to the side as Sheldon removed his pants and his briefs. She wasn't much of a briefs fan, but as long as they went off of Sheldon, she'd let it go. Seeing the tighty-whities were a bit off a turn off, but she wasn't going to force him to change his underwear. Maybe, some time soon, though. "Based on our last encounter, we were a minute away from angry wailing and accusations mixed in with some tears." Penny chuckled, remembering their previous encounter as she pushed him down on his back.
It was a few days ago, when—unbeknownst to him—she was going to end their affair. She had gotten upset over Sheldon choosing to watch a rerun of Star Trek rather than hanging out with her. It was also the same day that Leonard, who was still hoping to get back together, left her flowers before going to a party Sheldon disapproved of (as if there was one he approved of) with the others. That alone made her wonder if it would be better to give Leonard one last chance. Sure, her and Leonard's relationship was built on straw and glue, but they could make it work, if they really, really tried. As much as she enjoyed the hot and sweaty fun with Sheldon, everything other than that was as if they were back to hating each other. Their relationship—if it was even one—was still on the friendship level, and even she had to admit that she wanted something else. She was a woman, and she wanted something more, and she knew that Sheldon was not ready to give that to her. She knew what she wished he'd give her, but, that was impossible. So, with a heavy heart and a dash of confidence (and a pinch of self doubt), she decided that she would end things with Sheldon.
She went over to 4A, where Sheldon was still watching the movie marathon and almost cried at how he smiled when he saw her. Then, as she sat beside him—still riddled with the guilt that she was ending things—he turned to her and told her that he was sorry. It was one thing to be hugged by the great Sheldon Cooper, and it was another thing to have sex with him, but to be apologized to! That was an entire different level of surprises from Sheldon! Although, the having sex with him bit was an entire thing of it's own—it was more than extremely rare for Sheldon to admit that he was wrong. And so, with all of her previous thoughts forgotten, she kissed him so hard he almost knocked over the lamp beside the couch, and she didn't care. Those were one of the few times when the average, everyday, normal Sheldon made her feel like there was something more between them than friendship, and sex. Sure, it was just a simple sorry, but she knew he meant it. But that was quickly aborted when Sheldon heard Raj's laugh from the stairs and proceeded to push her off him and rushing to hide in his room.
Penny had enough time to fix herself—and she did—then slid over to Sheldon's spot. When the guys entered the apartment, she pretended that she didn't know if Sheldon was home and that she just used her spare key. She also told Leonard that it was sweet of him to leave her flowers and that she appreciated it. Kind of. That was when Sheldon appeared and ordered her to move out of his spot, thus starting an argument with her. It was their greatest cover up, their so called hate for each other. They seemed normal to everyone else—Leonard even begging them to stop fighting—and continued as if nothing happened. Then, once everyone left, and Leonard had gone to sleep, Sheldon crossed over to her apartment. She greeted him in little next to nothing, and they continued what they had started earlier. It had been a close call—the closest they've ever had—but none of the other times had ever stopped them.
"I think Raj noticed something," Sheldon murmured as Penny placed a hand on his erection, "he sent me a few suspicious glance throughout the night. I don't think our fight convinced him."
Penny gently stroked his length, a dangerous smirk on her face. One that always sent shivers down Sheldon's spine. "I bet he was just scared that we'd kill each other. He thinks he owes me with the helping him talk to women thing, and even said that he'd defend me if you got mad at me." Sheldon sucked in a breath as Penny closed her hand around his arousal, her nails softly scratching the base. "I doubt that his words would do anything to c-convince me otherwise," he murmured, struggling to continue as Penny dragged her hand up and down his length. Penny knew that Sheldon always struggled to talk whenever they had had 'coitus'. Which was a perk—cause she'd kill him if he ranted about something stupid in the middle of sex—and it made her feel like she had power over him. It actually shocked her the first time they did it, he was rambling about how what they were doing was inappropriate, then, he had stopped. Completely stopped, and had even forgotten what he was saying.
"Would this make a few strikes disappear?" She gave his length a small lick, enjoying how he writhed under her touch, before positioning herself on top of his thighs. She resisted the urge to chuckle as she saw how Sheldon closed his eyes and leaned down to kiss him—and she knew his answer. That was the power she was talking about—that even the almighty Dr. Sheldon Cooper didn't stand a chance against her. That the great 'homo novus' could go weak from a simple touch from her. She would have never guessed that this would be her greatest trump card over him—other than calling his mother—and if she had knew that before (and that sex with him was so mind blowing), she might have done this from the start. Well, she might not have, considering how much of a pain no-sex Sheldon was—but when the guys invent a time machine, she'll make sure to tell Penny from way back then that it is a good idea.
She felt his hands tightly gripping her hips, sliding as if by magnetism into those places that fit so perfectly. Perhaps in response, she rubbed her pelvis forward against him, grinding his throbbing erection. Sheldon released a little growl into her lips and pushed back. Penny broke from the kiss and, with a smirk, began trailing kisses along his jaw and beneath his ear. Sheldon tilted his head to give her everything she seemed to want from him—Penny from the past would love this. It was only when her lips explored his collarbone and began a breathy slide down his chest that she noticed how he was softly moaning her name. "Penny..." She wasn't a stranger to how much of a turn on it was when she heard the guy call her name, but—when it first happened—she didn't expect to get addicted to the sound of Sheldon's husky, breathless voice, calling her name. Well, there was a lot of things she didn't expect to happen during their first time—and it shocked the hell out of her. But, no matter how many times they did this before, she never found herself getting sick of it.
Her teeth rasped across his nipple, his hips giving a spasmodic thrust and she knew she had him. Sheldon's eyes fluttered open, and he watched—eyes wide—as she lapped at the tender place below his hipbone, her hand encircling the base of his throbbing organ. He almost didn't notice her other hand sliding slowly up his thigh as Penny's breath pooled against his groin. A strangled sound emerged from his throat when she dragged her tongue along the side of his shaft and dipped its tip into the ridge below his swollen head.
"Ah, Penny, please!" Sheldon said through gritted teeth. She looked up at him then, meeting blue eyes so large and bright and—
"Ow."
"What?" Sheldon blinked in confusion. An annoyed furrow had formed between her brows. "You're pulling my hair." Her eyes darted upwards, indicating the top of her head. "Ouch."
Sheldon's hands had come to rest on the highest part of Penny's—her head—and his fingers were burrowed into her tumbled waves and was gripping her there. "Oh!" He immediately relaxed and withdrew his hands to rest at his sides. "I apologize, Penny—if I hurt you. I was just—uh—excited." Sheldon looked worried—afraid, and all she could do was let out a soft giggle. He looked absolutely adorable, and she was resisting the urge to laugh louder. "It's okay, sweetie, just don't pull too hard, okay?" He nodded, and she leaned in to give him another kiss before making her way back down, and plunging him deep into her mouth. Here in the bedroom—she means during sex—Sheldon wasn't annoying or condescending, and though he was sometimes rough and dominant (don't get her wrong, she loves that) he seemed to care more. During the early days of their trysts, Sheldon always asked her if she was okay and if he was doing something wrong. Which, was totally better than him barking at her while teaching her how to play Grand Theft Auto V. Like she said, Sheldon in the bedroom was so much more different than the normal Sheldon.
She loved that side of him.
Wait, well—not that she loved him, actually, she did love him but she didn't love him, love him! Okay, maybe she was closed to that—or maybe she really did love him-love him—but like she said, Sheldon would not be able to give that to her. He couldn't give it to Amy, so what made her so different? ... Other than the fact that she knew him way before he knew Amy, and that he had sex with her. Multiple times, and was currently in the middle of doing so. Great, now she was back with these trail of thoughts that led her to thinking of ending this that led her to think otherwise. Because she was so screwed—no pun intended—and she knew that she was falling in l-lo-lov... that with Sheldon. Which made her feel bad because it took Wil Wheaton, a breakup, jealousy, frustration, doubt and her english partner for her to say it to Leonard. Yet here she was, freely admitting it—to herself, of course—and in the middle of sex, too! If Sheldon proposed to her right now, there was a big chance she would say yes. This affair with Sheldon progressed a lot faster in months than her relationship with Leonard did in years! And that had reciprocated feelings, approval of everyone (except Sheldon, but she might already know why), and the freedom to have sex anytime they wanted, too! Heck, she could do so many things she wanted to do with Sheldon, with Leonard and it wouldn't even require a written-slash-verbal agreement!
Great, now she was turned off by all of those stupid thoughts.
... Or not because—as she expected—the way Sheldon was looking at her made her want to melt. Sheldon had officially switched into the dominant Sheldon that she lo—
"Penny, it has come to my realization that something is troubling you." He said slowly, placing his hands on her shoulders and pushing her off his arousal. "Am I right to say that this is about me?" It's really not a question, and she knew this because of the way his eyes steeled when it met hers. "If there is a problem, please tell me." His tone started out friendly, then it dropped deeper than the Marianas Trench—which, she totally remembered from one of his boring trivias—and she felt a shiver run down her spine. "I simply do not like asinine thoughts ruining activities I enjoy." The dominant, rough and sexy Sheldon—she almost thought that he wouldn't appear, she joked to herself. There was a rustle in the background, and when she looked down, she wondered how Sheldon had managed to prepare a condom.
"You, of all people, should know that I absolutely loathe it when something disrupts activities I enjoy."
Without anything else said, Sheldon flipped her over and pinned her down on her bed and she found herself staring into his dark, blue eyes. Though she thought it wasn't possible, with that simple contact, Penny became more turned on than she had all night. It was as if she could see directly into every secret desire he hid deep in his mind—the ones he might never tell her about. She could see his fantasies, his wishes, and his naughtiest, kinkiest, and the most fantastic sex dreams he had ever concocted. She briefly wondered if it was possible that Sheldon gets naughty dreams, but with him staring at her like that, it was possible. Maybe she was in a few of them—or all of them, she hoped. She did that a lot, nowadays, hoping. She hoped that she would get the role she auditioned for, and that there was a chance that Sheldon would feel the same about her. Right now, it didn't matter much, because all she could focus on was Sheldon and his blue eyes.
Then, in one single move, he positioned himself—still watching every flicker of her eyes—then slammed himself inside her. Penny let out a sharp shriek and clamped her hands around his back; an arm circled around his neck, while the other dug its nails into his back. He'd probably bitch about the scratches she would leave (like always), and how it would sting, but she really didn't care. She had to get a hold of something—anything—or else she'd lose it. She arched upwards, pressing her stomach against his, while her body curled around his and her head buried in his neck. Her lips began busily working on his skin and her tongue caught droplets of sweat as they rolled down his neck. She could hear him grunt and moan her name and it only caused her to do the same.
Sheldon pulled out and slammed back in again with a wild force. Penny clung to him as hard as she possibly could and tried to meet each of his thrusts with a roll of her hips. He was animalistic though; his body seemed specifically designed to pummel into her body with a power unlike any she had ever experienced before. Oh boy, if the Penny from the past would laugh at this exact scenario, the Sheldon from that timeline would probably join her, laughing. If only she could brag the guys—to everyone—who seriously thought Sheldon was asexual, how great, no, amazing Sheldon was and would ever be over them. Asexual, her pretty little ass. After their first time, it didn't take a second for Sheldon to get aroused by just the sight of her in her normal clothing—a tank top, and short, shorts. However, she wore those on purpose, and it worked. Now, she wore those to bait Sheldon, and though it took a while and an argument first, she always got what she wanted and was left satisfied.
It was a mystery how Leonard (and the neighbors) never heard her—though, Leonard might have already heard her, and had chosen to stay quiet. He knew that she was seeing other guys, but he didn't have to know who it was—especially, when he was still trying to get back with her. Unfortunately for him, Sheldon really wasn't giving her a reason for her to give their relationship another chance. Ha.
Her trail of thought was interrupted when Sheldon started to slow down his pace, and Penny leaned her head back to look at him. His face—and entire body—was covered in sweat, his hair was a mess, and his eyes were focused on hers. Crap, did he somehow manage to read her mind? She gave him a questioning look, and wondered, again, if it was possible to look inside the glorious mind of the brilliant Dr. Cooper. "Are you okay?" She asked as she stifled down a moan to keep her gaze on him, as he continued thrusting in and out of her. He blinked, pursing his lips as he stared back down at her—and Penny thought that he looked absolutely irresistible. "I just noticed that your eyes are a pleasing shade of green, that's all." There it was, the gentle Sheldon that she rarely saw. Sheldon was unpredictable like that—he would get all rough and demanding, then he'd be soft and caring then he'd revert into a whackadoodle. This was why she was always wondering about everything—if he really did feel something for her, more than friendship, of course. Because random moments like this were the reason why it was hard for her to end this, and to stop herself from falling for him.
"Now, Penny," his tone dropped again, possibly lower and huskier than before. "I want you, to come for me."
Then, Sheldon's movements quickened, slamming in and out of her—and forced her to scream in pleasure. To hell with the neighbors, to all of them, actually. His pace was quicker, and he suddenly became rougher—yet not rough enough to hurt her, and Penny could feel her orgasm building up inside her. She could tell that Sheldon was close, too, and that made her cling on to him again. She pushed him forward, causing him to sit up, and proceeded to grind down on him as he thrusted into her. Her eyes flew open and her mouth gaped in a soundless scream when she felt her body begin to shake. Penny clamped her teeth on Sheldon's shoulder, clawing her nails down his back even harder as she came. Her body shuddered against him, pressing herself onto him as she shook. He wasn't stopping yet, she realized as another wave overtook her and her legs began to shake. Sheldon was still moving, becoming faster, and rougher as he neared his orgasm.
A groan reached her ears as he orgasmed, his hands tightening on her hips as his body convulsed. They stayed that way, Sheldon sitting up on the bed and Penny clinging to him as they tried to regain their breaths. Once their breathing had returned to normal, Sheldon pulled himself out of her and allowed Penny to lie down while he disposed of the condom. He stared at the trash can, giving it a menacing glare, before taking a seat at the edge of Penny's bed and turning to her. "Will you change the sheets after this?" Aaand, the old Sheldon was back, the one who was a neat freak and hated germs and touching. Right after their exploits, Sheldon always instructed her to change the sheets, and to take a shower for good hygiene. She listened, of course, but there would always be a part of her that was annoyed with this Sheldon. She didn't hate it, since it was Sheldon, but hygiene lessons after sex weren't fun—especially when Penny still wanted another go. She was always like this after sex with Sheldon, she just couldn't have enough of him. He could last hours when he wanted to, that was usually when his darker side came out, and Penny loved that, too. One time, when the guys went to a convention that Sheldon had no interest in, they had gone at it for hours, and the only reason they stopped was due to Mary Cooper calling him. The thought alone of Sheldon's mother made them both realized how tired they were, and decided to just play Rock Band.
"Was there a time when I didn't do as you said?" Penny teased, causing Sheldon to scowl at her. She glanced at his back which was peppered with scars and fresh, angry red lines that her nails had left. In some odd way, she found the sight appealing. Penny wasn't a sadist or anything, it was just that the sight of the lines made her feel like Sheldon was hers, and hers alone. As if she was the only one who would ever see him like this, and that gave her a sense of relief. She was getting slightly clingy, and possessive—and she knew that, but she just couldn't help it. These kind of things never ended good—she of all people should know that—and with Sheldon being Sheldon, she couldn't see herself getting what she wanted. Whoever said feelings wouldn't get involved deserved to get shot in the head by a rocket launcher. Or a tank. If that was every single person's belief, then damn, the world would go into chaos. Cause fuck, feelings were always involved and she had never seen one where it wasn't. Just look at her! She was pining for the same idiot who banned her from the apartment just because she took his onion ring—and now with the friends with benefits arrangement involved, the feelings she so desperately tries to hide got even more amplified! Emotions were always involved, and that was the plain damn truth that people in sex with no strings relationships always failed to learn.
She would be lying if she said that she didn't want an honest to goodness relationship with Sheldon. She would also be lying is she said that she didn't see this—everything—coming. The emotional turmoil, the heartache, the heartbreak—she knew that it would happen from the first time she kissed Sheldon. Arrangements like this always led to a whirlwind of emotions, both happy and sad. This might be karma for stealing guys from girls back home, and for leading so many men on—like Leonard, and for so many other things she did wrong. But did she regret it?
Fuck no.
"As much as I'd absolutely love to point every single one out," Sheldon twisted his body towards her, a small hesitant look on his face. "We have little time left before the others return, and I still need to take a shower."
"Can I join you?" Penny gave him a sultry look, running a hand down her legs. Sheldon had a torn expression before raising an eyebrow and swallowing. "You can, but you may not." Penny pouted at him, turning to get on her hands as an idea came to mind, raising her voice a bit. "Aww, but I had so many fun things in mind," she started to slowly crawl up to him, her pout turning into a smirk as she kneeled beside him. "I've always loved water," she placed a hand on his shoulder, and slid one down his chest, trailing it down to his growing erection. "And think, not only do we get to have some fun, but you also get the chance to teach me what proper hygiene is." She watched Sheldon close his eyes as she wrapped her hand around his entire cock, stroking it with increasing speed. She added a second hand to the pressure she was applying to his erection and laughed gently as she passed her thumb over the tip of him. He jerked against her and she grinned wickedly.
"T-the guys are—"
"Are what, Sheldon?" she whispered, teasing his earlobe with her tongue. "Coming back? They might be, but they might not. What is the math telling you?" Suddenly, a loud buzzing sound erupted from her nightstand and with much hesitation, she tore herself from the physicist and reached down to check her phone. "Who is that?" Sheldon growled—probably annoyed at the idea of someone distracting her from him. He made it clear, he didn't like it when something ruined activities he enjoyed. Coitus with her was officially one of them. Take that, Sheldon from years ago. "It's Leonard."
"What did he say?" She could sense that Sheldon was trying to not sound jealous and demanding. His tone changed with each word. She opened the message, and found herself inwardly cheering at what she read. "He says that he'll be coming home a bit later cause they're going to eat out." Original message: Hey Penny, it's Leonard, but you already knew that. I have something I wanted to give to you, but it seems that we're gonna be home a bit later than expected. Raj was craving for dumplings and practically guilt tripped us to going with him. Is it okay if you check on Sheldon? He probably got the message by now, but I just want to make sure. I'll just drop by later. End long message. She wasn't going to tell Sheldon the real message, nope. Besides, the message didn't mean anything—it's not like she was going to get back together with Leonard anytime soon. Which was why she really felt bad about leading him on, but what was a girl to do? Leonard was more than willing to give her what she (desperately) wanted from Sheldon... but even so, she's not going to lose the one chance she had. Maybe sometime soon, Sheldon would feel the same way about her.
That sounded a bit crazy, stalker-ish.
"Do you think that they'll take their time?"
"Yeah, probably." Then she felt something warm behind her, and turned to find Sheldon staring at her with lust filled eyes. "We have time." It was all Sheldon said before he pushed her onto the bed, climbing over her and kissing her quickly on the lips. She grinned and raised her eyebrow softly. "I think we have a lot of time." Sheldon smiled softly, before driving himself far and deep inside of her.
So, no, she really had no intentions of ending things with Sheldon anytime soon. Even though there was a tight chance of him falling helplessly in love with her like she had for him; and this might not end well, but even the smallest glint of hope could keep her going. If there was one thing she was sure of, it was her feelings for Sheldon. She may sound desperate, but it was the cold hard truth that hit her like a ton of bricks, and this time, she wasn't going to give up.
What could she say; a woman in love would go through a lot just to get the man she loved to love her back.